Funny stories about politicians
This is the first of several hubs I am going to write about funny stories. It is one of the things I have been doing online which has made me happy and I hope that has made others happy too.
This time I will start with a couple of little comical tales about politicians.
I know, it is easy to joke about politicians but I am just starting and other subjects will follow. But if you like this ones I can make another one, I have lots of politicians jokes to share.
Well, in fact they give us comical material almost every day.
I will not personalize this jokes to avoid any chance of hurting someone´s feelings but of course you can think about your "favorite" politician while reading this stories. That won't kill him, that is for sure!
They are all...
A bus full of politicians hits a tree on the side of the road near a very remote farm.
There was a witness in that place when the accident took place and he started to burying all the politicians.
A few days later comes a researcher who sees the crashed bus and asked the witness what happened to all the politicians who were inside the vehicle.
- I bury them! Said the man.
- But were they all killed? Asks the investigator.
The man answered:
- There were some of them who said they weren't. But you know how politicians are, they are always lying...
Where should we put them?
A politician had an accident and dies.
His soul reaches the Paradise and found St. Peter at the entrance.
-- "Welcome to Paradise! Before you could get in, there is a little problem... We rarely seen politicians here, you know… So we do not know what to do with you..."
-- "I see, no problem just let me enter." says the politician.
-- "I though I would like to let you in but I have higher orders as it´s known… We will do the following: You pass one day in Hell and one day in Heaven. You can then choose where to spend eternity."
-- "It is not necessary, I have already decided. I want to stay in Heaven." says the politician.
-- "Sorry, but we have our rules."
So, St. Peter takes him to the elevator and he comes down, down to Hell. The door opens up and he sees himself in the middle of a beautiful golf course.
In essence, the club where were all his friends and other politicians with whom he had worked. All very happy.
He was greeted, embraced and then they started to talk about the good times when they got rich at the expense of the people.
They played golf, relaxed and then ate lobster and caviar.
Who was also present was the devil, a very friendly guy who spent all the time dancing and telling jokes. They enjoyed themselves so much that before they realize it was time to go.
After a lot of redundant hugs and words of farewell he enter into the elevator.
He rises, rises and the door opens up again. St. Peter was expecting him.
-- Now it´s the time to visit the Paradise.
He spends 24 hours in paradise among a group of happy souls who go from cloud to cloud playing harps and singing. All went very well and before he noticed the day comes to an end and St. Peter returns.
-- "Now what? You spent one day in Hell and one day in Heaven. Now choose your eternal home."
He thought for a minute and answered:
-- "Look, I never thought to make this decision… The Paradise is very good but I think I'll be much better in Hell."
Then St. Peter takes him back to the elevator and he comes down, down to hell.
The door opens up and he saw himself in the midst of a massive ground full of garbage and a horrible smell. He saw all his friends with the clothes torn and very dirty searching the rubble and putting it in black bags. He also saw some of his friends in dispute to take pieces of rotten food.
The devil put the arm by the politician´s shoulder.
-- "I do not understand?" Mumble the politician. -- "Yesterday I was here and it even had a beautiful golf course, a club, lobster, caviar and we danced and had fun all the time. Now I see that it´s only full of very smelly garbage and my friends are totally tear down!"
The devil looks at him… Ironically smiles and says:
-- "Yesterday we were in campaign season before election. Now we have your vote... I´m sorry, this is the reality!"
Politics can be funny
Mark Thomas political comedy stand up show
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