Baby Homecoming Tips For Dads!

www.flickr.com  Father with new baby
www.flickr.com Father with new baby

Childbirth is obviously a female thing. Apart from the mother giving birth, there are the nurses at the hospital, the midwives and even all the female relatives flapping around cooing and hugging the new baby.

But what about the father of the new baby? He soon starts to feel left out. After the mother has given birth the whole world and its wife wants to give advice, send flowers and just go all gooey over the new baby.

Sometimes new dads just need to feel wanted too. Lets face it, they were part of the baby making scenario.

They have held their wives hand, helped her breath properly and sat down with the new screaming bundle with a look of bewilderment and joy on their faces. But then they start to feel a bit redundant.

What can they do now? Apart from wetting the babies head down the nearest pub with their mates it seems that their little piece of fatherhood has come to a grinding halt. At least until the new baby and mother gets home.

So here's a few tips on how to keep the new dad involved in their brand new offspring, and help their partner get home to a child friendly house that they can both enjoy.

www.wisegeek.com  Scrub that carpet1
www.wisegeek.com Scrub that carpet1

Need To Know?

Cleaning

First of all the house needs to be scrupulously clean and tidy. You can't bring a baby home to a house that has barf on the carpet! yes I know you went out to celebrate the birth with your mates, but seriously guys you need to start scrubbing. And yes that means washing up too!

As a guy living at home for a few days on his own, especially after running backwards and forwards to the hospital, the house is going to smell and look like a tip. Time to get scrubbing.

Check the fridge too. A couple of stale yogurts, a gone off pint of milk and a candy bar are not going to be sufficient for a first night homecoming. And no, you do not want that half eaten stale pizza, throw it away!

Throw everything, and I mean everything in the washing machine. This includes bed sheets, clothes 'hung up' on the floor, and cushion covers. Anything that looks or smells stale.

Don't panic, you may not have to iron all of it after washing. But if you do, the iron is that funny shaped thing under the sink that goes on top of the other funny shaped thing in the corner.

Just plug it in and follow the instructions, or lack of! Don't get it too hot, you don't want a dirty great hole in the bed sheets. Or cushion covers either!

Flower Power

Yes I know that the hospital has been filled up with flowers from the in laws, your parents and just about everybody else including the woman from the local deli who is just being nosy.

But that's not the point. The one person who hasn't sent the new mother and baby flowers is you.

You don't have to go mad and smother the house in so many bunches of roses and tulips that it looks like Kew Gardens.

Just a few vases of fresh cut flowers dotted around the house will look and smell lovely.

There's nothing like beautiful displays to make the house look welcoming.

Freshen Up The House

Open the windows and let the clean air rush through. Don't overdo it with the air freshener, but some of those plug in ones will do nicely.

If you are a smoker now is the time to quit. If you find that you can't quite give up those cigarettes, then make sure from now on that you only smoke outside.

There's not a lot of point cleaning a house from top to bottom, opening the windows and washing everything if you are going to puff obnoxious smoke around the house.

Smoking is dangerous for babies. It is a factor in cot deaths, and pulmonary problems in infants. So for goodness sake throw them away.

Clean the windows, doors and worktops. Along with stale smoke stains, dirt and grime gets in all the little nooks and crannies. Don't use too much bleach. It can stink a room out at fifty paces.

Just use perfumed cleaners or disinfectant. They smell great and get rid of all the long standing smelly stuff.

startcooking.com  Stock up on the food! and no curries!
startcooking.com Stock up on the food! and no curries!

Fill Up The Food Cupboards

Now is the time to hit the shops. You need to buy essentials such as bread, milk, and basic foods. Think carefully about what the new mother wants to eat when she gets home. And no, a stomach churning hot curry will not do!

Soups, sandwiches and other easy to make foods are the way to go. She won't feel like cooking, and if you can't cook without burning water then its not a good idea to suddenly decide that Cordon Bleu cooking is the way forward!

Hopefully with all the in laws and your parents getting involved I am sure that at least one of them will be willing to provide food such as stews and soups for you both. If not, give them a hint. I am sure that they will want to do something to help.

www.mamasandpapas.com Hey dad, this is a mobile!
www.mamasandpapas.com Hey dad, this is a mobile!

Cots And Cribs

Have you put the cot or crib up yet? No? Why not? If you decided to leave it to the last minute, well, this is the last minute!

Whether its done or not, it's a good idea to go up and check that everything is safe. Check the cot. Has it any pointy edges?

Is the bedding all ready and clean? Check plugs to make sure they are fire safe. Make sure that lamps are fireproof and there are no wires running across the floor.

You and your partner will be doing a lot of walking up and down in that room trying to get baby to sleep. We don't want any accidents now do we?

Hand a mobile to the cot. No, not a mobile phone! A mobile is a hanging toy with balloons or airplanes on bits of string!

Lay baby wipes, diapers and cleansers on the nearest dressing table. I know this sounds obvious, but believe me, when you have a baby in one hand and the wrong stuff in the other its a real pain when you can't find what you are looking for. This is the time that you have to learn to juggle!

free stock images Wine, because she deserves it!
free stock images Wine, because she deserves it!

Did Someone Say Wine?

Now you have all the essentials put away, cleaned the house and finished the washing there are just a couple more things to do. Yes I know, you are totally worn out by this stage but bear with me.

Check to see if there is anything you have been putting off for months. Did you finish putting up that shower curtain in the bathroom? What about sorting out the dripping tap? Done? Great!

Now you can get down to the essentials. Go out and buy a couple of bottles of Wine. Believe me, your partner will appreciate the gesture.

She won't be able to drink a lot with the new baby, but a glass of wine will help her relax after she has been home a few days. Just the actual idea of sitting down and relaxing will help her settle back in.

I am sure that after all the hard work that she has done, she will appreciate the fact that you have gone to all the effort to make her and the new baby's homecoming really special. And hey, you both have to wet the babies head!


(c) Copyright Nell Rose

Dads, what did you forget to do?

  • Forgot to put up the Crib!
  • Clean the house
  • Get the food in, well I thought she would like curry!
  • Nothing, I am the perfect dad!
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Comments 53 comments

molometer profile image

molometer 3 years ago from Cambridgeshire, England

Hi Nell,

Excellent advice for the newbie Dad.

I am passing this on to some very special people.

All the votes.


drbj profile image

drbj 3 years ago from south Florida

Very inclusive and informational for new dads, Nell. I would amend the 'Fill Up the Food Cupboards' section to highlight the information that foods that are the BASIC necessities are required. Not Snacks which many men may believe cover all the basic food groups.


prasetio30 profile image

prasetio30 3 years ago from malang-indonesia

Very inspiring hub. I learn much from you, Nell. I love your tips. Now, I am ready become a father. Thank you very much. Up and useful :-)

Prasetio


Jackie Lynnley profile image

Jackie Lynnley 3 years ago from The Beautiful South

Very good tips. I came home with both my babies to have to clean house! And I was in hospital 10 days with both, so it wasn't like he didn't have time. Wow, Nell the memories this hub brings back!!!! lol

Great one, voting up and across!


Faith Reaper profile image

Faith Reaper 3 years ago from southern USA

Excellent tips here for the Dads!!! Sometimes men just need little suggestions, hints and a big push to get them thinking along these lines. Every expectant mother should print this off and tape it to the fridge.

Voted up +++++ and sharing

Blessings, Faith Reaper


mariasial profile image

mariasial 3 years ago from united kingdom

Very nice and unique tips ... Excellent hub


ChitrangadaSharan profile image

ChitrangadaSharan 3 years ago from New Delhi, India

Very thoughtful hub!

After the birth of a baby, lot of changes come in the life of couples and while everyone focuses on the mother, fathers have to make lot of adjustments too. He has to take extra care of his wife, the newborn and to some extent household affairs as well.

Here you have pointed out some useful tips to the expectant father.

Very well done! Thanks for sharing!


carol7777 profile image

carol7777 3 years ago from Arizona

I remember the mania before each baby was born. I rewashed the kitchen curtains about three times and cleaned the house like I would never have another moment. And with the second one..a day before labor I was cutting out a skirt on the floor to make for afterwards. We had one clean house...Thanks for a great hub and bringing back memories.


Nell Rose profile image

Nell Rose 3 years ago from England Author

Thanks michael as in everything else I got the idea from someone who has no idea what he is doing! lol! thanks!


Nell Rose profile image

Nell Rose 3 years ago from England Author

Hi drbj, lol! yes you are right there! thanks I will go back and take a look, nell


Nell Rose profile image

Nell Rose 3 years ago from England Author

Hi pras, you will be a great dad! and I am sure you wouldn't need all these tips, always great to see you, nell


Nell Rose profile image

Nell Rose 3 years ago from England Author

Thanks Jackie, I think that happens a lot, the guys are so excited about the new baby they just forget about everything else like cleaning! lol!


tillsontitan profile image

tillsontitan 3 years ago from New York

This is a perfect compliment to my hub on new babies! Your humor shines through every line..."you and your partner will be doing a lot of walking"....your tips are right on the mark and every expectant Dad should read them.

My son is a Sergeant in the National Guard and brings his superior cleaning habits home...no dust bunnies in that house!

Voted up, useful, funny, and interesting.


Nell Rose profile image

Nell Rose 3 years ago from England Author

Hi Faith, lol! thanks so much, glad you liked it, nell


Nell Rose profile image

Nell Rose 3 years ago from England Author

Thanks mariasial, glad you liked it, nell


Nell Rose profile image

Nell Rose 3 years ago from England Author

Hi ChitrangadaSharan, thanks so much for reading, nell


Nell Rose profile image

Nell Rose 3 years ago from England Author

HI carol, lol! sounds a bit like I was when my son was born! thanks as always, nell


Nell Rose profile image

Nell Rose 3 years ago from England Author

Hi Mary, congrats again on your new grandchild! yeah! lol! I think we all need to be married to a guy in the services, sounds good to me, I know they learn to do all that cleaning! thanks so much, nell


christopheranton profile image

christopheranton 3 years ago from Gillingham Kent. United Kingdom

It's great to be just an uncle. You get to give the kids back. So much work! Just thinking of it makes me feel tired.


Nell Rose profile image

Nell Rose 3 years ago from England Author

Hi christopher, you got the best of both worlds! lol! thanks as always, nell


MsDora profile image

MsDora 3 years ago from The Caribbean

Simply beautiful--and practical. Forwarding to my son who already brought his baby home, but might still be able to pick up on a few tips. Thank you and Voted Up!


Nell Rose profile image

Nell Rose 3 years ago from England Author

Thank you MsDora, I am glad you liked it, I started writing it for a friend who didn't have a clue what to do! lol!


kimkennedy 3 years ago

NELL.....??? your not trying to tell us somethin are you? you pregnant?? or are you gunna be a nan?? lovely blog hunny but when i had my kids i had to do EVERYTHING!!!!!! on my own even my ...haha...parents didn,t help me. it would have made it soooo much easier AND special if i would of came home and everythin was clean and tidied FOR ME but i done it ALL before i went in. even down to painting n decorating the baby,s room. i was on my hands and knees painting skirting boards at 8 months (with my middle child) i DO have to give MASSIVE thanx to my bf of nearly 4yrs and dad to my 2yr old (my 3rd child) because he,s BRILLIANT and helps me soooo much. (should of met him YEARS ago) just want to say that if i would have been given even half the help when i had my kids would have been soooo appreciated so to anybody thinking of helping someone who,s having a baby, IT WILL be appreciated very much no matter how small, believe ME. ; ))))


AudreyHowitt profile image

AudreyHowitt 3 years ago from California

Lovely write--and so very practical--I love it!


Nell Rose profile image

Nell Rose 3 years ago from England Author

Hi kim, lol! long time no see! no don't panic, I am not pregnant, I wish! or a granny, it was a friend of mine who was moaning that she was doing everything as she is pregnant! Her boyfriend just stood there looking bewildered and so I thought, well, why not! lol! great to see you, nell


Nell Rose profile image

Nell Rose 3 years ago from England Author

Thanks Audrey, glad you liked it, nell


Ruchira profile image

Ruchira 3 years ago from United States

Where was this hub when my kid was born...Nell

I had a tough time instructing my better half.

Useful hub...sharing it across


Vellur profile image

Vellur 3 years ago from Dubai

Great advice and tips, voted up.


shiningirisheyes profile image

shiningirisheyes 3 years ago from Upstate, New York

Nell - What a thorough and incisive tool you have provided for those new dads!


Fossillady profile image

Fossillady 3 years ago from Saugatuck Michigan

Hi Nell, I remember how much my husband's sense of protector took over his entire being when he first became a father to our two sons. He helped as best he could running errands. He was a real hands on dad . . . not so much help in the dish doing department, though . . . lol!


aviannovice profile image

aviannovice 3 years ago from Stillwater, OK

Sounds good, Nell. Dad really needs to know what he can do to help, and I'm certain that he really wants to do that. This makes a lot of sense and will make him feel like he is part of the picture. Great work, awesome and up.


Nell Rose profile image

Nell Rose 3 years ago from England Author

Thanks Deb, so many guys seem to get lost in that time between the baby coming and homecoming, hopefully this will give them an idea what to do, thanks so much, nell


Nell Rose profile image

Nell Rose 3 years ago from England Author

Hi kathi, no dishes? lol! seriously that's great, mine just helped a bit but not that much! thanks as always, nell


Nell Rose profile image

Nell Rose 3 years ago from England Author

Hi shining, thanks so much, nell


Nell Rose profile image

Nell Rose 3 years ago from England Author

Hi Vellur, thanks for reading, nell


Nell Rose profile image

Nell Rose 3 years ago from England Author

Thanks Ruchira, sorry to hear that, yes some guys just don't get it do they? thanks for reading, nell


kittythedreamer profile image

kittythedreamer 3 years ago from the Ether

Great tips for new dads, Nell. Boy where was this article when I had my baby? LOL.


Nell Rose profile image

Nell Rose 3 years ago from England Author

Hi kitty, lol! yep me too! my husbands idea of helping was to just carry stuff around, that was it! thanks as always, nell


teaches12345 profile image

teaches12345 3 years ago

What a great post and one that many new dads will find helpful. These suggestions will really make the difference for the new mom as well.


Nell Rose profile image

Nell Rose 3 years ago from England Author

Hi teaches, thanks so much, I am surrounded by friends and friends daughters who are expecting at the moment! lol!


Nell Rose profile image

Nell Rose 3 years ago from England Author

Hi teaches, thanks so much, I am surrounded by friends and friends daughters who are expecting at the moment! lol!


phdast7 profile image

phdast7 3 years ago from Atlanta, Georgia

Terrific Hub Nell. Sp practical and sensible and yet written with warmth and humor. :)


Nell Rose profile image

Nell Rose 3 years ago from England Author

Hi phdast, thanks so much for reading, nell


Glimmer Twin Fan profile image

Glimmer Twin Fan 3 years ago

I love that this is geared to fathers. So often they are overlooked. Really useful suggestions Nell!


Nell Rose profile image

Nell Rose 3 years ago from England Author

Thanks so much Glimmer, I am glad you liked it, yes fathers do seem to have been overlooked poor things! lol!


justmesuzanne profile image

justmesuzanne 3 years ago from Texas

Wonderful advice for new dads! I am glad to see a parenting focus on advice for men these days. :) Voted up and awesome!


Nell Rose profile image

Nell Rose 3 years ago from England Author

Thanks so much suzanne, glad you liked it, and yes I do see your point, men do tend to get forget in all the hoo ha of new babies! lol!


mary615 profile image

mary615 2 years ago from Florida

Too bad all new Dads aren't required to read your Hub, Nell. Good advice for them, and I know the Mother's would appreciate it if Dad did al this!

Voted UP etc.


Nell Rose profile image

Nell Rose 2 years ago from England Author

Thanks mary, I think many people forget about the dad, and he can help in so many ways to feel part of the new baby, nell


Greenhousewife profile image

Greenhousewife 2 years ago

Great advice, Nell! We recently had our own bundle of joy and are approaching his 4th week of life. My husband has been a real savior these last few weeks but would still benefit from reading your tips! Voted up!


Nell Rose profile image

Nell Rose 2 years ago from England Author

Hi Greehhousewife, Congrats! that's wonderful! And I am sure your husband is a real help too, sending all my good luck and wishes your way!


OhMe profile image

OhMe 2 years ago from Pendleton, SC

I will have to share this with our son. He and his wife are expecting twins so I am sure he will appreciate reading your tips. Thanks.


Nell Rose profile image

Nell Rose 2 years ago from England Author

Hi OhMe, that's great! congratulations to all! and thanks for reading, nell

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