For DAD and MOM, from a Sorry "AVERAGE" CHILD
... I am JUST ME...
This slide show has touched me as a child and as a parent. But before making more comments, I would like to translate it in the English language.
This is a message of a child to his parents. Here it goes:
I AM SORRY
Tomorrow, our report cards will be given to you. My sister is so excited, while I am truly nervous. Surely, she is at the top rank. I am just an average student who would be so lucky to have an 84 mark.
Mom and Dad will hug her so happily. And they would tell me, “Why not try to be like your sister? You never do anything but paint! Will you get rich with that?...”
Mom and Dad are saving for my sister’s college education. She is going to take up Medicine.
I study real hard but I could not do better… I don’t understand.
I could not have a face to show you, Mom and Dad… I’d like you to be proud of me. But my head aches as if it will blow. It is so difficult.
I am sorry. I am just ME…
It’s my birthday next week; I wish I could still be with you.
I have a painting under my bed… I kept it there until you read this letter.
In that painting, you are hugging me… I like to feel that you love me even if I could feel it only through a painting.
By the way, Mom, I won a painting contest, I deposited my cash prize at my sister’s bank account to add for her savings.
My sister, I am so proud of you. I know you will be a doctor. It’s just so unfortunate that you can’t cure me.
Dad, Mom- I am dying… Sorry I did not tell you, I have a brain tumor. You just did not notice because you are busy.
Do you still remember when our school called you and you did not come? You thought I did something wrong. On that day, our school awarded me with recognition for being honest because I returned a lost wallet to the owner.
You got mad because I got home late, but I came from an awarding ceremony on that day. Please open my cabinet; I have several medals, trophies and certificates of recognition. They are all for you.
Please promise me to keep them. They may not be important to you, but I was somehow happy because of them. I am sorry if you can’t see any reason to be proud of me. I hope you can accept me for who I AM. I LOVE YOU SO MUCH- I hope that is enough.
Daddy, Mommy, I AM SORRY… goodbye.
Last week, I spent time with a friend, complaining how difficult for his son to be taught at school. He has low grades and he is too lazy to study. I told my friend to just encourage his son and stop comparing him to his older brother who is a constant honor student. She shrugged and said, “It is easy for you to say that, because your son is smart and learns as fast as a blink of an eye…” I was surprised. I never really had the guts to advice her with such, just because my son is smart as she said, but because I have learned from life that everyone is equipped with a talent that is uniquely theirs. And I thought her son is turning into something that she does not like because of the pressures he’s been getting from her.
As a parent, I never really
compared my son to anyone. He is imperfect, but whenever I hear other people
comparing him with other kids may he be the better one or not, I just keep a smile
to myself and I hug my son lovingly, because I don’t even have to find ways to
be proud of him. To me, he is more than perfection. I am and will always be
proud of him, HE DOES NOT EVEN HAVE TO TRY.
This has reminded me of one of the many lessons I have learned about life, that NO ONE is comfortable whenever he is being compared to others whether directly or indirectly, and that NO ONE should ever be pressured to be someone they are not and be forced to be like someone else.
Every human is unique in his own way… and it is his right to be himself. Any man who does not sabotage the rights of others by being himself has all the right to be what and whoever he is.
At some point in my life, I admit
with teary eyes that some people who should love me for who I am expected me to
be someone I am not… and I could still feel so hurt whenever I remember. I can
testify that having such kind of experience can really hurt one so bad, that it
could really make one feel so unloved and unappreciated. Luckily, on my part, my parents and family were there for me, and there are many people who neutralized the effects of such an experience and I can say that I have traveled from hell and back with flying colors. Think of this, if one can be hurt so bad by other people for being unappreciated, how much more if one feels that kind of treatment from his own parents?
Children should never be compared to anyone else. In their young heart and mind, they think that you are always right, especially if you are their parents. Never instill in the heart of your children that there is a “boss” and a “slave” between them. Never tag them with some sort of things that will just harm their ego whether directly or indirectly. Never belittle anyone of them in front of anyone especially in the eyes of their siblings. Do not ruin your own family by creating gaps between your kids just because of favoring one from the other. Show them respect and love for whatever and whoever they are.
In this life, no parent could ever really shield his child from people and things that can make or break him. But as long as one keeps trying to be good parent, and as long as one keeps holding on to God to guide him to be one, one can never fail to have children who can be the best of who they are. Respect every child in his own silver lining. Make him realize that it is okay to fall, what matters is how he gets up each time he fails. Let him keep in mind that every card is an ace as long as it is uniquely his own, and that life is not all about winning or losing but it is how he lives it that matters.
Keep in mind, that your children are humans, not robots that you can program the way you wish to. You don't own your children, they are individuals who has a mind and feelings that are uniquely theirs. If your ideas and preferences don't meet, be gentle enough to say so but show them that you respect their opinions. Make them feel loved and appreciated even if you don't think the way they do. What matters is that they don't ruin their own life. Be there to guide, but not dictate them.
Realize as a parent that nothing will ever be the same if you lose one of your kids. Let them be who they are, help them realize their potentials through encouragements and not by pressuring them to be like someone else. Never laugh at them in front of others and don’t hinder them and deprive them of chances to explore and develop their talents.Show them people to look up to but never put in their heads that they should be like them.
"I learned to love life because my parents loved and is loving me for WHO I AM..." (DjBryle, "I Owe It ALL To YOU...")
If YOU want YOUR KIDS TO BE WELL ROUNDED and LOVING, TEACH THEM IN A LOVING WAY...
Other HUBS by DjBryle
- Mending A Soul (Why Forgive... and Forget When You Are Hurt?)
Forgive and forget?...
- Why, MOM?
You're still there but Im alone...You heard me cry but you...
- I Write...
all the pieces of you are scattered in my entire being
- Journey to Pregnancy (Planning It Right)
Pregnancy is one of the most exciting and wonderful experience...
To My Son...
I AM PROUD OF YOU...
Not just because you are smart and witty, just like others always say...
...Not just because you are sweet and cute...
Not just because you can sing the Bohemian Rhapsody...
... Not just because I feel so blessed for having you...
But because of WHO YOU ARE... and WHATEVER YOU CHOOSE TO BECOME...
There are many wishes in my heart that I hope you would be....
But, I will always be here to support you in whatever road you may choose to follow someday...
I won't be afraid, because I believe that you will always have enough knowledge and wisdom in choosing what road to take...
You know why I have such confidence?... It's because I LOVE YOU!
I am writing this hub not only for my readers, but most especially for MY SON. I hope that when he grows up, he will take time to read this... So that I could truly make him realize that he is my most wonderful miracle, the BEST gift I ever had. He has changed me into a better person who just realized that a good life can be more beautiful... much more than I have ever imagined. I love you so much, MY PRINCE. I know that I will never be a perfect mom... but I will always love you perfectly for who you are...
Copyright by DjBryle, 2010
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