For DAD and MOM, from a Sorry "AVERAGE" CHILD

... I am JUST ME...

This slide show has touched me as a child and as a parent. But before making more comments, I would like to translate it in the English language.

This is a message of a child to his parents. Here it goes:

DADDY, MOMMY

I AM SORRY

Tomorrow, our report cards will be given to you. My sister is so excited, while I am truly nervous. Surely, she is at the top rank. I am just an average student who would be so lucky to have an 84 mark.

Mom and Dad will hug her so happily. And they would tell me, “Why not try to be like your sister? You never do anything but paint! Will you get rich with that?...”

Mom and Dad are saving for my sister’s college education. She is going to take up Medicine.

I study real hard but I could not do better… I don’t understand.

I could not have a face to show you, Mom and Dad… I’d like you to be proud of me. But my head aches as if it will blow. It is so difficult.

I am sorry. I am just ME…

It’s my birthday next week; I wish I could still be with you.

I have a painting under my bed… I kept it there until you read this letter.

In that painting, you are hugging me… I like to feel that you love me even if I could feel it only through a painting.

By the way, Mom, I won a painting contest, I deposited my cash prize at my sister’s bank account to add for her savings.

My sister, I am so proud of you. I know you will be a doctor. It’s just so unfortunate that you can’t cure me.

Dad, Mom- I am dying… Sorry I did not tell you, I have a brain tumor. You just did not notice because you are busy.

Do you still remember when our school called you and you did not come? You thought I did something wrong. On that day, our school awarded me with recognition for being honest because I returned a lost wallet to the owner.

You got mad because I got home late, but I came from an awarding ceremony on that day. Please open my cabinet; I have several medals, trophies and certificates of recognition. They are all for you.

Please promise me to keep them. They may not be important to you, but I was somehow happy because of them. I am sorry if you can’t see any reason to be proud of me. I hope you can accept me for who I AM. I LOVE YOU SO MUCH- I hope that is enough.

Daddy, Mommy, I AM SORRY… goodbye.

Love, Migs

Source

Last week, I spent time with a friend, complaining how difficult for his son to be taught at school. He has low grades and he is too lazy to study. I told my friend to just encourage his son and stop comparing him to his older brother who is a constant honor student. She shrugged and said, “It is easy for you to say that, because your son is smart and learns as fast as a blink of an eye…” I was surprised. I never really had the guts to advice her with such, just because my son is smart as she said, but because I have learned from life that everyone is equipped with a talent that is uniquely theirs. And I thought her son is turning into something that she does not like because of the pressures he’s been getting from her.

As a parent, I never really compared my son to anyone. He is imperfect, but whenever I hear other people comparing him with other kids may he be the better one or not, I just keep a smile to myself and I hug my son lovingly, because I don’t even have to find ways to be proud of him. To me, he is more than perfection. I am and will always be proud of him, HE DOES NOT EVEN HAVE TO TRY.

This has reminded me of one of the many lessons I have learned about life, that NO ONE is comfortable whenever he is being compared to others whether directly or indirectly, and that NO ONE should ever be pressured to be someone they are not and be forced to be like someone else.

Every human is unique in his own way… and it is his right to be himself. Any man who does not sabotage the rights of others by being himself has all the right to be what and whoever he is.

At some point in my life, I admit with teary eyes that some people who should love me for who I am expected me to be someone I am not… and I could still feel so hurt whenever I remember. I can testify that having such kind of experience can really hurt one so bad, that it could really make one feel so unloved and unappreciated. Luckily, on my part, my parents and family were there for me, and there are many people who neutralized the effects of such an experience and I can say that I have traveled from hell and back with flying colors. Think of this, if one can be hurt so bad by other people for being unappreciated, how much more if one feels that kind of treatment from his own parents?

Children should never be compared to anyone else. In their young heart and mind, they think that you are always right, especially if you are their parents. Never instill in the heart of your children that there is a “boss” and a “slave” between them. Never tag them with some sort of things that will just harm their ego whether directly or indirectly. Never belittle anyone of them in front of anyone especially in the eyes of their siblings. Do not ruin your own family by creating gaps between your kids just because of favoring one from the other. Show them respect and love for whatever and whoever they are.

In this life, no parent could ever really shield his child from people and things that can make or break him. But as long as one keeps trying to be good parent, and as long as one keeps holding on to God to guide him to be one, one can never fail to have children who can be the best of who they are. Respect every child in his own silver lining. Make him realize that it is okay to fall, what matters is how he gets up each time he fails. Let him keep in mind that every card is an ace as long as it is uniquely his own, and that life is not all about winning or losing but it is how he lives it that matters.

Keep in mind, that your children are humans, not robots that you can program the way you wish to. You don't own your children, they are individuals who has a mind and feelings that are uniquely theirs. If your ideas and preferences don't meet, be gentle enough to say so but show them that you respect their opinions. Make them feel loved and appreciated even if you don't think the way they do. What matters is that they don't ruin their own life. Be there to guide, but not dictate them.

Realize as a parent that nothing will ever be the same if you lose one of your kids. Let them be who they are, help them realize their potentials through encouragements and not by pressuring them to be like someone else. Never laugh at them in front of others and don’t hinder them and deprive them of chances to explore and develop their talents.Show them people to look up to but never put in their heads that they should be like them.

"I learned to love life because my parents loved and is loving me for WHO I AM..." (DjBryle, "I Owe It ALL To YOU...")

If YOU want YOUR KIDS TO BE WELL ROUNDED and LOVING, TEACH THEM IN A LOVING WAY...

Source

To My Son...

I AM PROUD OF YOU...

Not just because you are smart and witty, just like others always say...

...Not just because you are sweet and cute...

Not just because you can sing the Bohemian Rhapsody...

... Not just because I feel so blessed for having you...

But because of WHO YOU ARE... and WHATEVER YOU CHOOSE TO BECOME...

There are many wishes in my heart that I hope you would be....

But, I will always be here to support you in whatever road you may choose to follow someday...

I won't be afraid, because I believe that you will always have enough knowledge and wisdom in choosing what road to take...

You know why I have such confidence?... It's because I LOVE YOU!

........................................................

I am writing this hub not only for my readers, but most especially for MY SON. I hope that when he grows up, he will take time to read this... So that I could truly make him realize that he is my most wonderful miracle, the BEST gift I ever had. He has changed me into a better person who just realized that a good life can be more beautiful... much more than I have ever imagined. I love you so much, MY PRINCE. I know that I will never be a perfect mom... but I will always love you perfectly for who you are...

Copyright by DjBryle, 2010

More by this Author


Comments 38 comments

Petra Vlah profile image

Petra Vlah 6 years ago from Los Angeles

The letter is hear breaking and I feels so bad for the parents who will understand too late what a wonderful person their child was.

Every child is special and precious in their own way and all want to be accepted and make their parents proud. Encouraging a child to develop and be his/her best is what moms and dads should do


acaetnna profile image

acaetnna 6 years ago from Guildford

This is a truly magnificent hub, my eyes welled with tears as I read it. Loving a child for just being them is so, so important. As a parent I will always tell my children just how precious they are and will love them equally. We are all different, no one is perfect but the most precious gift that you can give to another human being is to love and respect them for who they truly are. Loved your message here and I am so pleased I found you.


VioletSun profile image

VioletSun 6 years ago from Oregon/ Name: Marie

This was truly beautiful, a powerful message on unconditional love! Your son is blessed to have an aware mother like you.


onegoodwoman profile image

onegoodwoman 6 years ago from A small southern town

This broke my heart.........


bhebot profile image

bhebot 6 years ago from Philippines

another excellent hub! thanks for sharing your emotions.


QudsiaP1 profile image

QudsiaP1 6 years ago

Your hub really moved me. The video of that boy truly broke my heart. I wish parent could understand the value of their children instead of constant comparison.

I am lucky to have parent who always appreciate me.


Christy Zutautas 6 years ago

That's really sad and unfortunately it happens to too many children. Parents need to encourage their children and it helps when teachers encourage their young students as well. Really great hub!


Mama Sez profile image

Mama Sez 6 years ago from Canada

The story is heartbreaking, I hope more parents can read your hub and learn right away rather than be sorry later. Thanks for sharing :)


DjBryle profile image

DjBryle 6 years ago from Somewhere in the LINES of your MIND, and HOPEFULLY at the RIPPLES of your HEART. =) Author

@Petra: The letter made me shed tears. Thanks for leaving a very insightful comment. You add substance to this hub. Thanks for dropping by!


DjBryle profile image

DjBryle 6 years ago from Somewhere in the LINES of your MIND, and HOPEFULLY at the RIPPLES of your HEART. =) Author

Thanks for such a very touching comment Acaetnna. My eyes were filled with tears too as I was writing this hub. I am blessed for having met you at HP too! See you around! =)


DjBryle profile image

DjBryle 6 years ago from Somewhere in the LINES of your MIND, and HOPEFULLY at the RIPPLES of your HEART. =) Author

Thanks for finding this hub beautiful and powerful, VioletSun,having such a comment from a gifted hubber like you means a lot. God bless! =)


DjBryle profile image

DjBryle 6 years ago from Somewhere in the LINES of your MIND, and HOPEFULLY at the RIPPLES of your HEART. =) Author

The letter broke my heart too, so I was inspired to write a hub about it. Thanks for dropping by! =)


DjBryle profile image

DjBryle 6 years ago from Somewhere in the LINES of your MIND, and HOPEFULLY at the RIPPLES of your HEART. =) Author

Thanks too Bhebot, for dropping by! Here's looking forward to reading hubs from you soon! God bless! =)


DjBryle profile image

DjBryle 6 years ago from Somewhere in the LINES of your MIND, and HOPEFULLY at the RIPPLES of your HEART. =) Author

@Qudsia: I bet your paents are so lucky too because you well understand how much they apprecaite you. Thanks for dropping by! =)

@Christy: Thanks for spending time with my hub and for adding more significant details to it. It is a sad reality that some parents unconsciously hurt their child by expecting too much from them. It means a lot to see you at my page. See you around! =)

@Mama Sez: hey, mama Sez! I am so glad to hear from you again. Thanks so much too for spending time with this hub, it means a lot to me! See you around. =)


prasetio30 profile image

prasetio30 6 years ago from malang-indonesia

Very inspiring hub. This is super hub from you. I really appreciate your work, very touching my heart. With all my heart....I give my VOTE UP special fro you. Have a nice weekend.

Blessing and hugs,


SilentReed profile image

SilentReed 6 years ago from Philippines

Parents should be aware of the sibling rivalry they cause because of favoritism. the hidden talents that are prematurely strangled to death because of disparaging remarks and belittling attitudes towards their "average" children.


Mentalist acer profile image

Mentalist acer 6 years ago from A Voice in your Mind!

As a middle child,this touched my heart greatly DjBryle;)


debbiesdailyviews profile image

debbiesdailyviews 6 years ago

What a powerful writer you are.

You have produced a Hub that has a very important message.

And evoked so much emotion.

I love popping back to read your work, as you never cease to amaze us.

Thank you for posting this, it is wonderful.


DjBryle profile image

DjBryle 6 years ago from Somewhere in the LINES of your MIND, and HOPEFULLY at the RIPPLES of your HEART. =) Author

@Prasetion: Thanks so much for such a very warm appreciation my friend. I feel honored especially that they come from you. Thanks for the vote too and most of all for always spending time with my hubs. See you around. =)

@SilentReed: I agree with that. These parents do not only ruin the self esteem of their children but also the relationship the "average" child has with his siblings. Thanks so much for dropping by and for adding much needed substance to this hub. See you around! =)

@MA: I am honored to know that my hub has touched your heart my friend. Your parents must be so proud of you because not everyone can write as beautifully and as eloquent as you do. You are an extraordinarily gifted writer. I will always admire you and I want you to know that I feel so blessed having met you at HP. =)

@Debbie: Hey! You always make me blush with flattery my friend! Thanks so much too for spending time with my hubs, I am always so glad to see you at my page. =)


gr82bme profile image

gr82bme 6 years ago from USA

Fantastic! I am going to share your hub. I think more people need to read this.

Great job


DjBryle profile image

DjBryle 6 years ago from Somewhere in the LINES of your MIND, and HOPEFULLY at the RIPPLES of your HEART. =) Author

Hey Gr8, I feel fantastic for receiving such a very kind comment from you! Thanks so much and for dropping by... See you around! =)


Peggy W profile image

Peggy W 6 years ago from Houston, Texas

This is such a powerful message that everyone needs to hear and take to heart. Voting this up, useful and beautiful and also plan to tweet this. Great song in that first video!


Micky Dee profile image

Micky Dee 6 years ago

We are what we are. God bless you Dear DjBryle!


chinafood profile image

chinafood 6 years ago from china

I believe that your child will certainly be as good as you!


Lita C. Malicdem profile image

Lita C. Malicdem 6 years ago from Philippines

I never cried this loud- and alone-! In some point, I found myself where my 2 daughters are concerned, having done the habit of making comparisons. My eldest left her chance of landing in a good-paying job in Manila and found a low-paying one in the province instead which I believe isn't fit for her educational qualification. Both my daughters are law graduates- the younger passed the bar, while the eldest is yet to take another. She had already sacrificed a lot since their Dad died to augment our family income to support her sister in her bar exams.

I didn't really mean to hurt my daughter, I only wanted her to take the bar again, but she insisted she would rather establish her good job record first as it was hard to look for one after the bar again.

Of course my daughter isn't a future lawyer for nothing. She is now enjoying her perk in a respectable corporate firm. My dream is still the same, but I just keep it in my heart, as I see my daughter enjoying her new job- now in Manila.

I'm sharing this on top of your story to make parents aware, in case they are committing the same mistake. Thank you. I'm still crying. Hindi ko talaga mapigilan. {Can't help it). Thank you.


Sandyspider profile image

Sandyspider 6 years ago from Wisconsin, USA

Well written hub on unconditional love for your children no matter what. The letter broke my heart.


andromida profile image

andromida 6 years ago

I think every parents should follow your advice.When I was much younger I faced similar problems where I used to be compared with others and the same happened with my brother as well.Also I had to abandon doing some of my fav. things that I used to find great enjoyment.Actually, this type of dictatorial parents need psycho therapy,not the kids. I think

you are a great parents.I've twitted this hub to my friends.Thank you so much.


Karanda profile image

Karanda 6 years ago from Australia

This is heartbreaking but I loved the way you reminded us as parents how important it is to let your chilren know how special they are in their own way. Lovely, just lovely.


DjBryle profile image

DjBryle 6 years ago from Somewhere in the LINES of your MIND, and HOPEFULLY at the RIPPLES of your HEART. =) Author

@Peggy, Micky and Chinafood: Thanks so much for those comments and for always dropping by my page. I am always so happy to see you here! Take care and God bless! See you around! =) ...See you at Twitter too Peggy. =)

@Lita: Hey, mam Lita... cry no more. I am sure your daughters know how lucky they are to have you as a mom. Your daughter is so blessed because it was not too late when you realized what you've been doing to her, she definitely knows how much she is loved and will always be loved by you. Take care and God bless! =)

@Sandy and Karanda: Thanks so much for those warm comments. I am always glad to hear from you. See you around! TC and God bless! =)

@Andromida: Hey, I think it's not too late for you to do your favorite things again my friend! =) Your hubs are so well written, thoughtful, so unique and amazing... they show how well you overcame such an experience. Be proud of yourself and let your own colors shine through! Take care and God bless! See you around and I'll visit you at Twitter! =)


Maria Cecilia profile image

Maria Cecilia 6 years ago from Philippines

Jen this reminded me of my other write up still kept in the vault hahaha, I wrote a letter to my son, Part I and Part II, the sad thing is I lost the part II and I have no way of recovering it..... and you know why I wrote that in spite of me so single and still very young at those time because of my affection for someone whom I imagined as his dad... but still I had the same mind as your that in case this son of mine arrives, I will let him read the letter..... this is amazing...


Maria Cecilia profile image

Maria Cecilia 6 years ago from Philippines

Jen, I read maam lita's comment and that was then I realized the depth of this, I can't identify at some point because I am an only child and I guess my parents gave me the free will to choose what I like, but I know my father will be very proud (if he is still living these days)to see my articles in a magazine, write like this in hubpages, sayang when all these things are happenning to me I no longer have a parents who can rejoice with me. but on a lighter side hihihi ayaw ko ng parents talk baka makiiyak pa ako kay mam lita, I am like a parent to my dogs, and I have favorite si Peso, but it didn't mean I love my other dog less, it just that lalo lang nafocus attention ko kay peso when he became sickly, and my dog Pissy she was like my anchors when peso was sick, and then this march she surprised me with an ailment that until now I did not what... she died... it depressed me for months, and I am partly guilty...friends assumed my other dog gave up because she felt I needed Peso more... sad... but it's too late... tears can't bring her back to life


DjBryle profile image

DjBryle 6 years ago from Somewhere in the LINES of your MIND, and HOPEFULLY at the RIPPLES of your HEART. =) Author

Miss Macel, stop regretting now... we are but humans who can't do things perfectly. You know too well that you love Pissy. And of course you needed to take care of Peso too. Things happen for a reason. Dogs are sensitive, I know that Pissy felt how much you loved her. Take care! xoxo


images99 6 years ago

Thank you so much for sharing this sentimental page .I have so much to share on this subject, this is really very touchy.Thanks again.


DjBryle profile image

DjBryle 6 years ago from Somewhere in the LINES of your MIND, and HOPEFULLY at the RIPPLES of your HEART. =) Author

Thank you so much for appreciating this hub, Images99, and for dropping by! See you around!


maggs224 profile image

maggs224 6 years ago from Sunny Spain

I loved the first video and all that you wrote after that. It is so important to appreciate those who you have around you while they are still here. I would never want to be in the position of the parent who found a letter like the one in the first video when it was too late to do anything about it.


DjBryle profile image

DjBryle 6 years ago from Somewhere in the LINES of your MIND, and HOPEFULLY at the RIPPLES of your HEART. =) Author

Thanks so much for your kind words, Maggs. God bless! See you around.


Becky Puetz profile image

Becky Puetz 5 years ago from Oklahoma

Such an important message for parents. I have four grown children and it has never entered my mind to compare the success of one against the others. Each is special in their own way and has achieved their personal desired level of success. Heart touching story, awesome hub. Thanks for sharing.


DjBryle profile image

DjBryle 5 years ago from Somewhere in the LINES of your MIND, and HOPEFULLY at the RIPPLES of your HEART. =) Author

Becky- Thanks so much for warmly appreciating the message of this hub, my friend! I am always honored to have you at my page. Cheers! =)

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