HORMONES GALORE - TEENS - TWEENS AND MORE
From Kid To Tween To Teen
It happened so fast!! I know everyone knows this!! I have memories of many people saying this to me when I was pushing a stroller a long time ago! Well "voila!!" It has finally happened to me!! It is like a "growing pill!" You don't know what to expect but it just keeps happening!
I have a son that is fourteen years old and in his last year of middle school and he has changed rapidly in the past few months. My daughter is now going to enter middle school next year. Both of my children are three years apart. Well almost! My daughter seems to be changing faster then my son and she is the youngest. I have heard that girls mature physically a bit quicker then boys. Well, that is happening in my house! Hormones galore!!
When it started...
Well I have to say I noticed the first change when my son turned twelve years old. Some of the usual "hissy fits" and "meltdowns" I used to call them no longer seemed important and they slowly drifted away over time. By the time he turned thirteen, he seemed to be drifting into his own world. Being a single mother, I have had to play both roles at times and this was challenging with my son who wanted to know EVERYTHING and asked me a million questions about sex. I have to say that it was not easy to know what to say and what was "too much." His curiosity was "relentless." I often found myself trying to explain in all sort of creative ways. I will never forget when he looked me in the eye and said "Mom, I promise I will not have sex until I am "40." I tried so hard not to laugh. I really did! One of those moments a mother never forgets. He was trying to make sure I didn't worry! Well that rule has since changed (well in his mind anyway!! ha )!!
I take the "5th" now every time he asks me something. It is hilarious at times!! The best thing you can do is have a good sense of humor. The most important thing you can do is make your child feel safe enough to ask these questions.
The Clash In The House Between Siblings
Well, things have gotten better. I mean much better then when my son was changing and my daughter was not close to being a "tween" yet. The hard part was when my son was changing and the once "very close siblings" were hitting heads. My son was slowly changing into a tween and saw his younger sister as a nuisance. My daughter who was ten at the time wondered where her big brother had gone. This was the hardest transition in the house during this time. Now that my daughter is changing also, they are learning how to get along again in a different way. The only problem is now when they fight, it can get nasty! Both of them are very strong personalities and now that little sis is bigger, she does not get pushed around that easy. Things have really heated up this year. I blame hormones, attitudes and bad name calling! It has gotten to a place sometimes where I feel like I'm in a courtroom, but there are no "bad word" coin jars!
Let's just say they are wizards at "pushing each others buttons." It does not heat up that often but once the name calling starts and they keep going it can spiral into something nasty. Since my son is older I have had to have him learn how to have more self control when the younger one goes after him "just because." Now, if anything heats up he immediately leaves the room or ignores her. He no longer lets the conflict spiral into craziness. Sometimes his younger sister wants his attention but she goes at it in the wrong way. Lets just say "they are learning."
Learning To Know Each Other Again
As they both change they are learning to know each other as individuals with their own ideas and ways that they do things. It has gotten better since my little one got to age eleven and a half. They no longer say stuff like that (a half), but things have gotten smoother. My little one will be twelve in September and my son fifteen in December. He has his interests and she is finding hers. Eventually they will drift and go their own ways. I'm guessing next year they will not hang much with each other. It is interesting at this time to see how much they develop in their own lives away from their sibling. This is natural of course but it has been a journey for sure! Like anyone who goes into a room of new people they adjust just like we adjust. All and all they are really close and this bond is indeed a special one. Nothing makes me happier when I hear them laughing with each other in the other room. I hear them conversing in their own ways and it makes me smile indeed! I feel next year will be yet another transition as my son enters high school and starts juggling all sorts of things. Academics, music, his band and girls.
We All Hope For This One Day...
We can all hope for this one day. That our children will grow in the best of ways and eventually remain close. I can't say how important it is to be close to a sibling as you get older. My little sister and I are closer then ever and it makes life so much more wonderful. Even though we have had some blocks in the past, we were able to get through them and I honestly believe it is because of the relationship we had when we were younger. We were really close and we loved each other so much that no matter what we would never truly hurt each other.
Hub Pages Author - GPAGE
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