Having an Only Child

Oftentimes when people meet our daughter for the first time they ask, "Is she your only child?" When I respond, "Yes, she is." I leave it at that. Usually I feel like they are waiting for an explanation as to why we only have one child. This is understandable. As one who grew up with four siblings, I too question why parents decide to have only one child.

There are many reasons couples may decide to have only one child. For me personally, there are a couple of reasons that Faith is our only child. She was born early for unknown reasons and has special needs as a result. Because of her special needs, all of our energy went towards her and we couldn't imagine trying to take care of her and another at the same time.

By the time things became less stressful for us, I was older and my cardiologist recommended that I not have another child. (I have a congenital heart defect with which there are several risks in going through a pregnancy). At one time, I would have gone through it all over again in order for our daughter to have a sibling. My husband, however was not so willing. Eventually, I came to have peace with the fact that Faith is our only child.

Me, my husband and our only child.
Me, my husband and our only child.

How Many Children Do You Have?

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Only Child Statistics

In 2003, a Current Population Survey showed that single-child families outnumber two-child families (20 percent versus 18 percent).

According to a 2007 Gallup Poll, from 1936-1967, most Americans preferred larger families, with over three children. In 1973, the numbers changed and more Americans began to prefer smaller families. The number of Americans who prefer a larger family has been declining ever since.

That same poll showed that six out of ten Americans believed that the ideal number of children was two or less. This includes 56% of Americans think it is best to have a small family of one, two or no children. Three percent of that 56% believe that one child is ideal.

According to Carolyn White, co-founder of Only Child Magazine, there are currently around 20 million only children in American households. And according to Wikipedia, 40% of New York City residents have only one child.

Source

Stigmas of The Only Child

Even though the number of only children in the United States is increasing, there are still stigmas attached to the only child. Some of these include:

  • The only child is selfish and spoiled
  • The only child is lonely
  • The only child is more aggressive
  • The only child has more of a tendency to play with imaginary friends
  • The only child is sickly
  • The only child is needy and clingy
  • The only child will have problems socializing

Some of these stigmas date all the way back to 1896 when psychologist G. Stanley Hall said, "Being an only child is a disease itself." These stigmas continue to stick despite years of research that suggests these stigmas are false.

Traits of an Only Child

When it comes to birth order characteristics, only children tend to have the same traits as the first-born, but to a higher degree. The only child tends to be:

  • Close to parents
  • Self-controlled
  • A Leader
  • Mature
  • Dependable
  • Demanding
  • Unforgiving
  • Private
  • Sensitive
  • Mature beyond their age

Carl Pickhardt, PhD, author of The Future of Your Only Child says that, "Three distinctive characteristics separate only child families from those with multiple children." These characteristics include:

  • The only child feels they have an obligation to do right by the parents. Usually, the only child family is not very laid back as everyone is trying hard to please one another.
  • The only child receives all of the social, emotional and material resources their parents have to offer. And because parents typically make a high investment in nurturing and providing for the child, parents have high expectations and they expect the child to turn out well. In response, only children tend to want to perform well for their parents.
  • Because the only child has no siblings with whom to connect, to be compared to, to compete against, or to do conflict with, the child becomes "adultized" (socially and verbally precocious) from identifying with and interacting with these primary parental companions.

After reviewing over 100 studies on only children, Dr. Toni Falbo, a professor of Educational Psychology and Sociology at the University of Texas states, "These children tend to score slightly higher in verbal ability, go farther in school and have a little bit higher self-esteem, and a lot of this just has to do with more parent involvement and uninterrupted time with adults.”

 

Parents praying with their only child.
Parents praying with their only child. | Source

Some Parents Thoughts on Having an Only Child

Despite all of the research that proves how well only children can do in life and the advantages of being an only child, there is still a tough reality that some parents face when dealing with having just one child.

On the Berkeley Parents Network under the topic Having Only One Child, several parents discussed their concerns including this one from a mom who is torn between having just one child and adding another to their family:

I have struggled with this over the last year and felt paralyzed by conflicting emotions of guilt for not giving my only child a much wanted sibling and the fear that adding another through adoption (our best option) will greatly increase my stress level which may in turn negatively effect my otherwise happy, if not perfect, marriage and the very close bond I have with my daughter. My husband is happy with one child and is ambivalent about a second. When we talk, he brings up finances, college funds, retirement, etc.. All fair/rational concerns. We're equally concerned about the effects of increased stress.

The main issues that come up on this site for having an only child include:

  • Guilt for not giving their only child a sibling
  • Struggling with trying to get pregnant with a second child, thinking about adoption or in vitro fertilization
  • Questions about how to raise an only child
  • Hard to reconcile not ever having another child
  • One spouse wants another baby, while the other spouse doesn't
  • Rude remarks from others when telling them you're only having one child
  • Pressure from family and friends to have more than one child
  • Tired of people asking when you're going to have the next child
  • Finding peace with having an only child
  • Discovering only children who were not very happy being the only child
  • Hard for parents to accept their child being alone after they die

According to research, only children have more help reaching their goals.
According to research, only children have more help reaching their goals. | Source

Disadvantages and Advantages to Being an Only Child

These disadvantages and advantages were posted by only children on various websites:

Disadvantages

  • Too much pressure from parents to perform well
  • No one to grow up with - it would be more fun with brothers and sisters
  • Loneliness
  • Too quiet in the house after being outside playing with friends
  • Worried about being the sole caretaker of elderly parents
  • Pressure to have children to carry on the family name
  • Overprotective parents
  • Harder to make friends
  • Will never have nieces or nephews

Advantages

  • Glad to not have to deal with siblings
  • Have friends who are like brothers and sisters but don't have to live together
  • Very attached to parents, have a great relationship
  • More awareness of self
  • Have more help pursuing goals
  • More independent
  • Have parents undivided attention
  • Don't have to share
  • Don't have to compare myself to siblings
  • Don't have to fight parents for conversation

Reasons for Having an Only Child

There are several reasons couples decide to have an only child. We know in some countries, such as China, they are prohibited from having more than one as a means of population control. There may be some in this country who agree with the thought of having an only child in order to help control the world population. But more common reasons for Americans to have an only child include:

  • Women marrying later in life
  • High divorce rates
  • Prioritizing career
  • Infertility issues
  • Personal health issues
  • Finances
  • Emotional issues
  • Personal preference
  • Fear regarding pregnancy
  • Age
  • Family stress

As you can see, there are many factors that come into play with families who have an only child. While some struggle with the fact of having an only child, others are perfectly happy with their only. While some kids like being an only child, others dislike it. In the end, no matter what decision is made regarding having an only child or more than one, the decision is up to the parents and they shouldn't feel guilty in making that decision or be made to feel it is a wrong decision.

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Comments 51 comments

Cara 6 years ago

As for people waiting for explanations regarding why Faith is your only child, I sympathize with you. My husband and I have been married for a number of years now, and due to various diagnosed and undiagnosed health issues he has, we've not been sure we'd be able to have any. What's been fascinating to me is observing how many people automatically assume (even when we're meeting them for the first time!) that our reproductive choices as a couple, whether voluntary or not, are automatically their business. It's been surprising to me how many people assume that they're entitled to ask this question at all, let alone their belief that they are somehow owed an explanation.

At any rate, Faith is lucky to have two such committed parents! Adorable pic of her in the hayfield there, by the way---

Thanks for the article! Interesting info--


bayoulady profile image

bayoulady 6 years ago from Northern Louisiana,USA

A very well arranged,informative, thoughtful hub! Wow!I wish they had emoticons for thumbs up!

I've always wondered how my daughter would have fared as an only child. Seems like it is working out fine for you.

My brain injured ,mildly autistic daughter was an only child for ten years. I could not have another child. After ten years, I adopted her first sibling, a sister.Three years later, we adopted a son. She thrived on the larger family, and taught them both their ABCs and some of their early reading skills.(She reads on a second grade level.)So it was good for all of us.


Hello, hello, profile image

Hello, hello, 6 years ago from London, UK

This is a very hard and almost impossible decision. There is never a right or wrong. I have an only son, now grown up, and he seems to be happy. I have a big brother but we never clicked and when he got married he ignored me completely every since.

Thank you for an interesting read and I very sorry to read about your daughter. She is beautiful and seems happy.


Pamela99 profile image

Pamela99 6 years ago from United States

Cari, This was a very touching hub. Many people have only one child. My mother was an only child. You don't really owe anyone an explanation. I thought your article was excellent as you wrote the pros and cons of an only child.


Vladimir Uhri profile image

Vladimir Uhri 6 years ago from HubPages, FB

Thank you for this hub. You have the treasure at home.


breakfastpop profile image

breakfastpop 6 years ago

People who ask when someone is going to have another child are intrusive and over stepping their bounds. Only children do very well in life and all of the negative stuff said about them has proven to be ridiculous. They have the undivided attention of their parents and that can't be bad. I am married to an only child and he rocks!


Specialk3749 profile image

Specialk3749 6 years ago from Michigan

Some people can be very rude asking questions that they shouldn't. As you know, in my case, it is always if I am done having babies. It gets to the point that I could scream. lol It really isn't anyone elses business.

No matter how many children you have, the main thing is to know that between you, your husband and God, you have made the right choice. If you are doing what God wants, who can argue with you?

I love reading your hubs, it has really made me appreciate special needs children. I love the family pictures!


Ingenira profile image

Ingenira 6 years ago

I also have only one child, and this hub conmforts me to a certain extend. Thank you.

I love the family picture.


Dave Mathews profile image

Dave Mathews 6 years ago from NORTH YORK,ONTARIO,CANADA

An only child, 7 years old, a daughter to a couple in my prayer group at church, came up to me a few weeks ago, and asked me If I would pray for her. I asked why and she told me that she hated being an only child and wished that her mommy and daddy would have another child so that she would not always feel so much alone. I wept inside for this little girl as we prayed. Lonliness is extremely difficult for an adult, but for a 7 year old to be experiencing such an emotion is unthinkable and unforgivable. After we prayed, I hugged her and kissed her cheek, and reminded her that she is never truly alone, she has God, but I knew deep down this was not really a comfort for her, but what else could I do??

Brother Dave.


sheila b. profile image

sheila b. 6 years ago

I have 2 granddaughters who are only children. I haven't felt they are deprived of anything. I didn't have a sister, and sometimes I thought I'd like one, but that sister of my imagination was like my best friend in school, not a little girl 2 or 4 or 6 years younger than I. Mainly, we all should be content to live the life we have. And mind our own business.


dawnM profile image

dawnM 6 years ago from THOUSAND OAKS

great article, and I have to say only child or no child, if a parent can only handel one child then so be it, many people have more and cant care for them so then what? I guess that it is what it is......great topic


coffeesnob 6 years ago

Cari,

Excellent hub - heartfelt, well thoguht out and inspiring. I have onnly one child (well a biological child anyway)As it turns out I married a family of four LOL. And when we married my only child was 12 and she had no problem inetegrating into the new family and sharing with three other siblings. She was never lonely, never sickly clingy or needy. She did tend to be aggrressive-but I think she learned that from me :-)

today she is a mother of 3 and an inspiration to me..The other three are my kids too..and I love them as well..but just wanted to share that our kids are what we teach them to be and in so many ways I am glad I had her to myself for 12 years...I think we did ok

CS


stars439 profile image

stars439 6 years ago from Louisiana, The Magnolia and Pelican State.

Dear Cari Jean : A very lovely hub, and a lovely family. God Bless You Dear Heart.


Cari Jean profile image

Cari Jean 6 years ago from Bismarck, ND Author

Cara - First of all, I'm sorry to hear about your husband's health issues. I pray that he would receive healing. And yes, it is amazing how people think your reproductive choices are their business! I like a comment I got on Facebook regarding this matter: " It's too bad that people can't simply rejoice in what IS, and not project their ideas of what should be onto other people!"

Thanks so much for your comment, Cara. Be Blessed!


Cari Jean profile image

Cari Jean 6 years ago from Bismarck, ND Author

bayoulady - It's so great to hear how your daughter thrived after you had two others join your family. That is wonderful! God knew that's what your daughter needed. For us, I know Faith would make a great big sister but I also know she has done as well as she has because my husband and I have been able to put all of energy and resources towards her and her alone. If God opens the door for us to adopt one day, that would be great but if not, we're completely happy.


AEvans profile image

AEvans 6 years ago from SomeWhere Out There

We adopted our son and he was an only child until we took our 13 year old niece in. He has acclamated well to our niece being around, but there have been times when temper tantrums have came in to play especially over video games. Overall he is well rounded, intelligent, caring and loving. Maybe that is due to owning 3 Cockers and 4 birds. lololo He is also responsible along with us of course.

We have been asked why we did not adopt again which sometimes stirs my emotions and overhelming guilt, yes we have also thought about adopting another but it has not came to pass. I believe along with our niece our home is full of love so there isn't any reason to add more to the household. Our world evolves around both of them.:)


Cari Jean profile image

Cari Jean 6 years ago from Bismarck, ND Author

Hello, hello - It's good to hear that your only son is happy. As is our daughter! But I'm sorry to hear about your brother. It seems that with siblings, things change when we grow up. I'm not as close to my four siblings as I once was. Thanks so much for your comment.


Cari Jean profile image

Cari Jean 6 years ago from Bismarck, ND Author

Pamela - Thank you so much for your comment. My mother-in-law was an only child as well and she is such a wonderful woman! It really has to do more with how your raised than the number of children in the family.


Cari Jean profile image

Cari Jean 6 years ago from Bismarck, ND Author

Vladimir - thank you so much for your kind words. Our daughter truly is a treasure.


Cari Jean profile image

Cari Jean 6 years ago from Bismarck, ND Author

breakfastpop - Love your comment! My mother-in-law is an only child as well and she is such a lovely woman. People really do need to learn how to stay out of each other's business.


Cari Jean profile image

Cari Jean 6 years ago from Bismarck, ND Author

Specialk3749 - It seems everyone makes it their business to question the reproductive choices of others. When people first get married it's always, "so when are you having a baby." Then when they have a baby it's ,"so when are you going to have the next one." Then like you said, it's "so when are you going to stop having babies!" People are ridiculous sometimes. But I love the part where you say the decision is up to you, your husband and God. That is right on! Who can argue with God? Also I'm glad my hubs have made a positive influence, thanks!


Cari Jean profile image

Cari Jean 6 years ago from Bismarck, ND Author

Ingenira - I really do hope this hub offers you comfort. Thank you so much for your comment and kind words about our family photo!


Cari Jean profile image

Cari Jean 6 years ago from Bismarck, ND Author

Brother Dave - it breaks my heart that this little girl is so lonely. You're right, what else could you do? All you can do is pray for her. Hopefully she will have a friend come along in her life who will fulfill her desire for a sibling. To paraphrase the Bible, a friend sticks closer than a brother. Thanks for your comment.


Cari Jean profile image

Cari Jean 6 years ago from Bismarck, ND Author

Sheila - Great comment, thank you so much for sharing. You hit the nail on the head: be content.


Cari Jean profile image

Cari Jean 6 years ago from Bismarck, ND Author

dawnM - thanks so much for your comment. Yes, sometimes parents can only handle one - sometimes that's how I feel. I see other people trying to care for more than one child and I think, Thanks goodness that's not me!


2besure profile image

2besure 6 years ago from Charlotte, North Carolina

Faith is simply a beautiful child and has your wonderful smile. It is a great act of love to choose to dedicate your time to care for Faith. Pam


Cari Jean profile image

Cari Jean 6 years ago from Bismarck, ND Author

coffeesnob - It sounds like you and your daughter did more than ok! She sounds wonderful and for her to integrate so well into a new family is a testament to how well you raised her. I don't think this is the case for most blended families. I really admire you as a mom. Thanks so much for sharing! Be Blessed!


Cari Jean profile image

Cari Jean 6 years ago from Bismarck, ND Author

AEvans - thank you so much for sharing a part of your life. It is a wonderful thing you have done - both with adoption and taking in your niece. I'm glad it is turning out so well for you. Be Blessed!


Cari Jean profile image

Cari Jean 6 years ago from Bismarck, ND Author

Pam - thank you so much for your kind and gracious words. Be Blessed!


Cari Jean profile image

Cari Jean 6 years ago from Bismarck, ND Author

stars439 - thank you so much for your beautiful comment. Be Blessed!


DaniS74 profile image

DaniS74 6 years ago

Incredible. I am an only myself, and all that you describe is true. I am mother of two, by the grace of God. My first was a preemie, and though not special needs (he has suffered no preemie problems) I was not 'young' when I had him and I too battled with the decision of having another. I knew what it was like to be a 'lonely only' and I didn't want that for my son. Eventually, I was blessed with the second, and now, have to deal with the oldest/youngest birth order traits, but at least I know that one day when I am gone, they will still have each other for family.


Cari Jean profile image

Cari Jean 6 years ago from Bismarck, ND Author

DaniS74 - So glad to hear your preemie is healthy and that you were blessed with a second child. I do think about where our daughter will go when my husband and I are gone but I know there are so many people who love her so much. I can honestly say I have peace because I know God will take care of her and place her where she needs to be. Thanks so much for your comment.


snewmanphd 6 years ago

As the author of Parenting An Only Child and someone who has been studying only children and their parents for two decades, I cheer Cari Jean for bringing up one of the major issues parents of one child face. She has given us a comprehensive look at the choice more and more parents are making--particularly in the current economy. As one parent of a singleton told me regarding those who meddle in the reproductive choices of others, What makes them right and me wrong?


Cari Jean profile image

Cari Jean 6 years ago from Bismarck, ND Author

snewmanphd - all I can say is WOW. Thanks for that great comment - I really appreciate it!


DeBorrah K. Ogans profile image

DeBorrah K. Ogans 6 years ago

Cari Jean, Informative, concise, useful and enjoyable read! You have brought forward some very interesting issues in having an only child!

I think you are a great parent who is sensitive to the needs of her child! Thank you for sharing, In HIS Love, Peace & Blessings!


Cari Jean profile image

Cari Jean 6 years ago from Bismarck, ND Author

DeBorrah - thanks so much, your comments are always encouraging - as a writer and as a parent! Blessings to you as well!


Lady_E profile image

Lady_E 6 years ago from London, UK

Very touching - This Hub is helpful to those with an only child and those on the other coin who wonder why people have an only child. From my point of view. The fact that one has at least one child is a Blessing. Some parents spend thousands in search of having a baby.

Also, if parents are stable the child will have a good foundation and grow up grounded. If I had an only child, I'd ensure they were social with neighbours kids, cousins etc. They socialise in school as well.

Clinton's Daughter is an only Child. She got married this month - both Bill and Hilary happy and fulfilled as parents :)


Cari Jean profile image

Cari Jean 6 years ago from Bismarck, ND Author

Lady_E - thanks so much for your comment. I totally agree - having a child is a total blessing. I actually thought about Chelsea while writing this - she seems like an amazing person - there are many other famous people who are only children as well.


Eiddwen profile image

Eiddwen 6 years ago from Wales

Loved this hub. I've got six children but I certainly wouldn't say it was wrong for someone to be an only child at all. There are good and bad factors for both cases and I think it's everyone's choice and we are all entitled to this. Can't wait to read more of your work.


Cari Jean profile image

Cari Jean 6 years ago from Bismarck, ND Author

Eiddwen - thank you so much for your comment. Whether someone has one child or six children, they are all blessings.


gmwilliams profile image

gmwilliams 5 years ago from the Greatest City In The World-New York City, New York

Cari Jean, great hub! Being an only child is great. I enjoyed being an only child. I had privacy, time to talk to my parents, and individualized attention which can sometimes be overattention. Being an only child makes one strong e.g. when parents get overbearing, one learns to argue a lot and this comes in very handy when interfacing with authority figures in the workplace. Only children are quite resourceful and not as needy as children with siblings.

As a result of being an only child, I can spend time alone without any angst. My mother, who was one of ten, could not understand when I loved to spend a lot of time alone as a child and as a teenager. My father answered her, stating, be glad that she is like that and not like the typical teenager who gives his/her parents a hard time. My father even told her be glad that she is settled and mature. I can go out by myself and I am quite happy. My mother, on the other hand, is very needy and will have friends at any cost. People who are needy for companionship are likely to be taken advantage of by people because they have a low sense of self. Only children do have a high sense of self because only children are raised to be self-actualized. We are not as catty, competitive, two-timing, and/or backstabbing as people who have siblings. If us onlies ruled the world, there would be more acceptance, live and let live, and more peace in the world. Peace.


Cari Jean profile image

Cari Jean 5 years ago from Bismarck, ND Author

gmwilliams - I so appreicate you sharing part of your life and how you felt you benefited from being an only child. My mother-in-law was an only child and I think she would completely agree with you on everything you said. She loved being an only child! I do think they tend to have higher self esteem, as you stated. Even my only child who has a disability has high self esteem!

Thanks again for your awesome comment and amazing insight!


Amanda 5 years ago

I do have only one child and I love it! When I think about have another one I think about all issues of pregnancy...life is beautifull I enjoy with my son...I grow up with total of 5 sisters and 2 brother is a shame no one calls me...so sibblings...they will get marriage and I will take car of my grandauther and grandson when he decides to have because he is only 9 years...so after 10 years start over.OMG...this is all about how we think..out there are lots of kids in need...one child is fine just keep him busy to not be bored and they will be very happy.


Cari Jean profile image

Cari Jean 5 years ago from Bismarck, ND Author

Amanda - I know how you feel, my siblings and I were all close growing up but now we don't talk a whole lot. I truly love having just our little girl - she alone is a true blessing.


Tabatha 5 years ago

I thought of another pros/con to submit to your list. One reason I only have one child is that my family had so much favoritism in it, and I felt the best way to avoid that would be to choose to put all my resources into one child. We have been so close, and I felt that if I had another child, would I relate more or less to child two? Would they both feel like there was enough love? It is heartbreaking sometimes to care for a child who is not for whatever reason clicking with the parents and watches a sibling get more care and attention. I think the absence of favoritism is a great reason to have only one child, and ironically for the child who doesn't get lavished or is even scapegoated, being in a group may actually be much more lonely.

Also, I wonder if there are statistics on the ages of the parents, because an older parent (as mentioned the moms tend to be older) will give more of themselves... and they are more mature parents as well.


Cari Jean profile image

Cari Jean 5 years ago from Bismarck, ND Author

Tabatha - thank you so much for your comment and for sharing your experience. I think it is always a fear for a mom that she will not love her next child as much as she loved her first. But I think sometimes it actually can happen that one child is loved more than the others in the family. It would be interesting to look into some of the statistics that you mentioned. Again, thanks for sharing.


ErinElise profile image

ErinElise 4 years ago from Near Sacramento, California

Hi CariJean,

I enjoyed reading your hub. Growing up as an only child, sometimes there were times when I wanted sibling(s). But my parents were 36 and 40 when they had me, after trying for nearly 10 years, and they only wanted one child. I remember people asking my parents if I was their only and when they were going to have another one. People acted like there was something wrong with just having one child. People would always comment about me being lonely, but I wasn't lonely. Just because you're the only doesn't mean you're lonely. I am glad I am an only child. I had only one son for eight years and then got pregnant with my next son. The boys are 19 and 10. But shortly after my 10-year-old was born, I became pregnant with twin girls who are 9. I never thought I would have more than one child, but I am glad I have them all. But I do long for quiet sometimes as there's hardly a quiet time in my house and there are times when I just need to be alone and it doesn't bother me at all. Probably because that's what I was used to. Anyhow, I came across your hub because I am also doing a hub on being an only child. Good job on your hub. Have a great day! Erin


Cari Jean profile image

Cari Jean 4 years ago from Bismarck, ND Author

ErinElise - thank you so much for your comment. I would love to read your hub and get your perspective on being an only child. I myself find that hard to imagine as I had four siblings growing up, which may be why I don't do well on my own because I am used to having a flurry of activity surrounding me! Me daughter seems content being the only child and loves being the sole object of me and her dad's attention and although at one time I longed for her to have a sibling, I couldn't imagine it any other way!


gmwilliams profile image

gmwilliams 4 years ago from the Greatest City In The World-New York City, New York

Cari, Only children and their parents have been inculcated to believe that one should have a sibling. That is the sibling culture. Although there is substantiative proof that onlies fare well this underlying prejudice still exists.

Not everyone wants and/or has siblings. Siblings are not the be and end all. Most people with siblings refuse to accept this. They portend that EVERYONE must have siblings. Sometimes only children "wish' for a sibling or siblings because sublimal messages negatively convey that they are "abnormal" because of their only child status.

Only children are just as valid as other birth orders. Only children have companionship in terms of parents, friends, acquaintances, and other relatives. Only children also fare well in adulthood and in old age. Illustruous and successful only children include Charlize Theron, Chelsea Clinton, Natalie Portman, Condoleeza Rice, Jerry Lewis, the late Hedy Lamarr, the fabulous Betty White, Ginger Rogers, Robert DeNiro, Robin Williams, and Swoozie Kurtz. Yes, we are fabulous in ourselves!

Betty White who is 90 years old is sharp and alert and full of life. She is also fiercely independent. Onlies and parents of onlies need to be proactive regarding our lovely and precious onlies. We have to be as fierce as those mothers who have megafamilies. Have you noticed that when people criticique the large family and parents of large families, they vehemently defend their family status. They are totally unapologetic. Well, onlies and parents of onlies need to be unapologetic regarding the choice to have only one child. Don't let other people bully you as to how many children you should have? Become proactive regarding our only children!


Ruchi Urvashi profile image

Ruchi Urvashi 4 years ago from Singapore

I am blessed with one child and I am content with that. I think it is personal choice that requires us to think deeper instead of just pleasing others.


greeneyedblondie profile image

greeneyedblondie 2 years ago

I do feel sorry for only children, even though I know a few people who absoulutly LOVE it. I have two siblings, but they're so many years older than me it's as though I am an only child. I was very lonely growing up and because of this I've decided one day I'll have many children. I will add that my loneliness was also caused by the fact that both parents and both of my siblings are introverts and I'm an extrovert.

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