How To Be A Dad, Pregnancy and Labor

Making Babies

We all know how babies are made, sperm meets egg; they have a little party and then they divide a couple of million times until inside the mother sits a fully developed baby waiting to come out into the world kicking and screaming.

You have had your wicked way with the mother to be and a month or two later she tells you "We need to talk". This is your first big test "I am Pregnant," she says.

Now how you react at this point of time can be an indicator of how things are going to pan out between you and her and the baby to be.

When those words hit home, and the initial shock coupled with the inane screaming in your head stop, how are you going to react?

Scan Picture

My son Jason before birth 2010
My son Jason before birth 2010 | Source

Becoming a Dad

"I'm Pregnant" always a moment of stunned silence when you hear those words, then there is the reaction.

  1. My darling that is wonderful!
  2. How, why, what how did that Happen?
  3. Is it mine?
  4. Run away, change your name and never be heard of again.

If number one is your reaction, then there is a good chance that you will all be a happy little family together.

If number two is your reaction, it may not have sunk in properly yet and there is still a good chance that you will become a part of a great family.

If number three is your reaction, you are accusing your girl of cheating on you, of course this is just your first reaction to stunning news, there is still a chance to be part of a happy family so long as you grovel and plead for forgiveness and then accept that the baby is yours.

If number 4 is your reaction then you need to do a bit of growing up and if another girl is stupid enough to let you into her bed make sure you wear protection.





My Four Bundles of Joy

Left to Right: Jennifer, Jason, Bryan and Robert
Left to Right: Jennifer, Jason, Bryan and Robert | Source

Dancing Ultrasound Baby

Daddy and Pregnancy

So you are going to be a daddy, your little sperm, instead of landing in a tissue or a towel this time, has done what nature intended and has created a new life, your girlfriend is pregnant and your life has just changed forever.

They say that men get it easy during pregnancy. That the woman's body is doing all of the work while he breezes through life. As a father of four little darlings I can tell you that this is not the case being pregnant affects you too.

A good father to be will be there for his pregnant girlfriend, through all of her "little phases" Her hormones will be going on a rollercoaster ride and you will be there all the way holding her hand and supporting her.

You may be one of the very few lucky men who has a girl that breezes through her pregnancy as if nothing had ever changed but for those of us who aren't that lucky, pregnancy can be just as hard on us as it is on her.

Morning sickness

When your good lady is going through morning sickness you had better hope that you work during the daytime, I made the mistake of working an evening job with our first born.

Standing behind her rubbing her back whilst she brings up her breakfast and last nights supper may sound easy, but this is when she first starts blaming you for her condition. Thank goodness, her head is down the bowl because some of the words that come out of her mouth would put a nun in a coffin.

Crying

Her hormones are going wild and she will suddenly break down in a flood of tears, it is very difficult to console her, especially when she does not even know the reason why she is crying. You have to be there to reassure her, hold her hand and again accept the blame for your part in the conception.

Cravings

A pregnant woman is prone to strange cravings, pickled onions, ice cream, mustard and pineapples and some women go the whole hog and crave items that are not usually eaten such a coal or chalk. Woe betides you if she has a craving and you do not have what she wants in the house. No matter what time of day or night, you will have to get it for her. Thank goodness, for 24/7 stores, just pray that they have what she is craving. Of course, by the time you get back home, she has changed her mind and you have to go out again.

Jason and Alison Seconds after Birth July 2010

Jason was born at home just as the ambulance arrived
Jason was born at home just as the ambulance arrived | Source

Daddy and Labor

In days gone by, men were told to fetch sheets and plenty of boiled water when his girl went into labor. Now we get to see every single gory detail in glorious Technicolor as we are invited into the labor ward to share in the wonderful miracle that is childbirth.

Now that men are invited into the labor ward, they get to play a very important role in the birth of their child, they get to sit next to their woman and hold her hand, comfort her and help with her breathing or panting through labor pains.

Sounds so easy doesn't it?

In reality when she feels pain, you feel pain she screams so loud your eardrums shatter. She squeezes your hand so hard your fingers almost break and when you are supposed to be helping her to pant properly, you hyper ventilate and almost pass out. At the same time she is shouting so many profanities at you, some that you have never heard before, that the nun in the coffin is now turning in her grave.

This can go on for hours and it usually does.

Daddy And Birth

When you hear the words "I can see baby's head," this is not the time to pass out, you will be left where you land, everyone else is too busy dealing with the birth of your child to bother about you. Try to stay upright because when they see baby's head the action is just about to begin, it's all hands on deck time, this is not a drill, baby is on the way and nothing whatsoever is going to stop it from happening.

Another couple of screams, a little more damage to your ears and fingers and suddenly baby is here slime blood and body fluids and all, but none of that matters because at that precise moment in time when you see that child for the first time you lose control of your emotions. You may cry, you may laugh, and it may be that you are too overwhelmed to show any emotion but as soon as you see that child in mom’s arms, you fall in love, a different love than you have ever felt before. A warmth engulfs you and you forget all that has gone on during the course of the pregnancy as you realise that this is the most perfect moment in your entire life.

Jason and Daddy

There is no feeling on earth greater than holding your baby for the very first time
There is no feeling on earth greater than holding your baby for the very first time | Source

Life Begins For Baby And Daddy

The Birth of your child is just the beginning, you have the rest of your life to get to know each other, to learn and grow with each other. To be there for your child whether needed or not, to spend time with your child to love your child unconditionally as your child will you.

Any man can father a child but not every man can be a father, if you try to do your best for your child through good and bad times then you are well on the way to being a great dad.

More by this Author


Comments 55 comments

Gordon Hamilton profile image

Gordon Hamilton 4 years ago from Wishaw, Lanarkshire, United Kingdom

Jimmy, what a great Hub. You're a very lucky man. It's my biggest regret in life (apart from starting smoking) that I never became a father and knew what it was like to have my own child.


Nell Rose profile image

Nell Rose 4 years ago from England

Hi jimmy, you made me laugh, you made me cry, this is funny, beautiful and totally true! My husbands hand was never the same again! lol! your family is beautiful, and by now you probably know the drill completely! voted up across the board, brilliant!


jimmythejock profile image

jimmythejock 4 years ago from Scotland Author

Thanks for your visit and comment Gordon, I regret the smoking too....jimmy


jimmythejock profile image

jimmythejock 4 years ago from Scotland Author

Thanks for your visit and kind words Nell, I am glad that you enjoyed this hub.....jimmy


freecampingaussie profile image

freecampingaussie 4 years ago from Southern Spain

I enjoyed your hub ! We have 3 daughters & my husband had to help the midwife deliver the 2 nd one ! I never screamed or swear with any of them .


missolive profile image

missolive 4 years ago from Texas

Jimmythejock, I LOVED this! You captured so many wonderful emotions with heart and humor - my favorite combination. You are truly blessed and I must admit I feel blessed to have been welcomed to share these wonderful intimate moments through your writing.

Well done.


livelonger profile image

livelonger 4 years ago from San Francisco

I loved this. It is a classic Jimmythejock Hub: chock full of wisdom, wrapped up in terrific humor. You've been down this road four times, so you really know what you're talking about. Your children are blessed to have you as their father, and we readers are for having read this Hub! :)


wilderness profile image

wilderness 4 years ago from Boise, Idaho

A good hub - great combination of wisdom and information all bundled with humor. A fun read - thanks.


ThePracticalMommy profile image

ThePracticalMommy 4 years ago from United States

What a great hub from the other perspective! And to think you survived it all four times. Your poor hands! My husband lucked out with that; both of my babies were born via emergency c-section, so there was no hand squeezing. ;)

Your kids are lucky to have a great dad. Well done with this hub!


chrissieklinger profile image

chrissieklinger 4 years ago from Pennsylvania

Nicely done. Becoming a parent changes your life and you hit on many key points that dads should be aware of.


GoodLady profile image

GoodLady 4 years ago from Rome, Italy

Wonderful 'Dad' point of view of the miracle of having a baby and I enjoyed your humor. A woman could never write like this!


SimeyC profile image

SimeyC 4 years ago from NJ, USA

Wonderful! Great way to convey the excitement and stress of pregnancy!


LauraGSpeaks profile image

LauraGSpeaks 4 years ago from Raleigh, NC

Good looking glass into pregnancy through a guy's point of view. Very funny!


Janis Goad profile image

Janis Goad 4 years ago

I love the hub, Jimmy. It is so good to read the father's perspective.


rahul0324 profile image

rahul0324 4 years ago from Gurgaon, India

What a wonderful hub! Makes it clear.. what my dad must have though when I was born...

Great great hub!


wynnestudios profile image

wynnestudios 4 years ago from Phoenix, AZ

I'm a step-dad to four beautiful girls and feel like a real father. It's not an easy job but is very rewarding!


greeneryday profile image

greeneryday 4 years ago from Some tropical country

Great Hub...having family is a wonderful experience


Just Ask Susan profile image

Just Ask Susan 4 years ago from Ontario, Canada

What a beautiful hub. I really enjoyed reading this and seeing all the pictures of your family.


christin53 profile image

christin53 4 years ago from UK

I loved reading this hub you sound like a wonderful dad and your children look beautiful.


Patty Inglish, MS profile image

Patty Inglish, MS 4 years ago from North America

Happy Father's Day, Jimmy. Blessings to you and your family.


onlineconsultant profile image

onlineconsultant 4 years ago from UK

Great article - I've posted a link on my Facebook, so hope you get some hits!


Marcy Goodfleisch profile image

Marcy Goodfleisch 4 years ago from Planet Earth

Awwww - beautiful thoughts! Happy Father's Day - and thanks for this delightful and touching hub. Congrats on the HOTD!


Ciel Clark profile image

Ciel Clark 4 years ago from USA

Funny and sweet.

My husband made me laugh more than once while I was in labor (!!!).

My father was the only person present at my birth except my mother. And me (eventually).

Thanks for a great hub and thanks to all the great dads out there.


Outbound Dan profile image

Outbound Dan 4 years ago from Niagara Falls, NY

Well done and heartfelt. As my wife is expecting our first in about a month in a half, this is all quite prevalent to me. Congrats on the HOTD!


Mmargie1966 profile image

Mmargie1966 4 years ago from Gainesville, GA

Oh thank you for publishing this hub! My daughter is just newly pregnant, and the father is not denying his child, just wants to take off.

You are such a great Dad! Thanks for sharing!


Sunshine625 profile image

Sunshine625 4 years ago from Orlando, FL

Congrats on HOTD Jimmy! Happy Father's Day to you!!


Kristine Manley profile image

Kristine Manley 4 years ago from Atlanta, GA

Wonderful Hub! Your children are beautiful. This Hub goes to my FB page.


Kathleen Cochran profile image

Kathleen Cochran 4 years ago from Atlanta, Georgia

Finally - A Hub of the Day that pulls at your heartstrings. Been waiting for one and this is a great one.

Happy Father's Day to obviously a great Daddy.


Jools99 profile image

Jools99 4 years ago from North-East UK

Jimmy, well done on your accolade! This is a great hub and you deserve it. Great that you made this light-hearted and serious at the same time; it has an excellent tone and is very, very honest and useful!


ktrapp profile image

ktrapp 4 years ago from Illinois

Thanks for the dad-to-be perspective of pregnancy and childbirth. I loved the last line, "Any man can father a child but not every man can be a father..." Happy Father's Day to you and congratulations on HOTD!


tjdavis profile image

tjdavis 4 years ago from Moscow, Texas

Awesome article. So nice to see a Daddy stepping up. Thanks for sharing your family with us.


Robie Benve profile image

Robie Benve 4 years ago from Ohio

What a great HOTD for father's day! Congratulations to you, and thanks for writing with such good humor about a truly special phase in every father's life.

I was a good pregnant wife, never had sickness, or craving at odd times of the day, besides ice, ice, ice. But I did confuse him quite a bit crying for no known reasons.

Ah, it makes me laugh now just thinking about it. :)

Happy father's day!


ashish04joshi profile image

ashish04joshi 4 years ago from India

Really beautiful, James...

I too can take a lead or two from this hub (obviously when MY time comes).

Thanks for this.


colombostock profile image

colombostock 4 years ago from Colombo Sri Lanka

Great Hub. Becoming a Dad is one of the most important event in our life.


glassvisage profile image

glassvisage 4 years ago from Northern California

Happy Father's Day! This is a wonderful Hub and perfect for this day of recognition. Congrats on such beautiful children and I wish you continued happiness and success as a father :)


Vinaya Ghimire profile image

Vinaya Ghimire 4 years ago from Nepal

What a wonderful hub to read on Father's Day.

Congrats for well deserved hub of the day.


Daughter Of Maat profile image

Daughter Of Maat 4 years ago from Rural Central Florida

Happy Father's Day!! Absolutely fantastic hub. My husband was there for me the entire time I was pregnant, and he still reassures me that I wasn't all that bad compared to most pregnant women. (Ya right, but thanks honey). At any rate, he's an awesome dad. Thank you for a great tribute hub to dad's everywhere! Voted up, awesome and shared all over!!


2patricias profile image

2patricias 4 years ago from Sussex by the Sea

This is the first time that I have rated a hub funny AND beautiful. This is a brilliant hub for Father's Day. Thanks so much for sharing your family photos.


jimmythejock profile image

jimmythejock 4 years ago from Scotland Author

Thank you all for your kind words, I can't believe this got Hub of the day woo hoo! thanks again everyone.....jimmy


coffeegginmyrice profile image

coffeegginmyrice 4 years ago from Toronto, Ontario

Happy Father's Day to you Jimmy! What a beautiful hub as beautiful as your babies! I enjoyed every bit of this hub from beginning to end and brought chuckles in between. Funny and beautiful! Congratulations to you for being a great dad and to this Hub of the Day!!

Sharing it :)


Uninvited Writer profile image

Uninvited Writer 4 years ago from Kitchener, Ontario

Way to go Jimmy :)


bn9900 profile image

bn9900 4 years ago from Alger WA

Great hub, Jimmy, but I was drawn to the first poster,Gordon, said he regretted not having kids. Don't regret it, if you have family that has kids become a favorite uncle, spend time with them. Volunteer at a place that helps children, those are the kids that need someone like yourself. If you would like, adoption is always an option. But I will tell you, the one thing you have that every father doesn't is sleep. Enjoy that. Happy Fathers Day to all!


urmilashukla23 profile image

urmilashukla23 4 years ago from Rancho Cucamonga,CA, USA

Congratulations on Hub of the day award! Keep it up.


Victoria Lynn profile image

Victoria Lynn 4 years ago from Arkansas, USA

Awesome! You sure prepared the expectant father! Well done with humor and beauty. Many votes on this one and sharing, too!

Congrats on being Hub of the Day on Father's Day! Very cool!


Dina Blaszczak profile image

Dina Blaszczak 4 years ago from Poland

Absolutely beautiful hub, your lady and your children are very lucky with such loving father!

Voted up and beautiful.


mary615 profile image

mary615 4 years ago from Florida

Happy Father's Day, and congrats on HOTD. It is a wonderful Hub for Father's Day. You are rewarded with four beautiful children, and I know how proud you must be of them. I voted this UP, etc. and will share and also on my FB.


Riverfish24 profile image

Riverfish24 4 years ago from United States

wow, wow, wow...awesome hub and perfect timing for HOTD. This needs to be saved for future reference and sharing with going-to-be-dads! Great job.


wheelinallover profile image

wheelinallover 4 years ago from Central United States

Ahh life in the fatherhood lane. I remember it like it was yesterday. My personal experience doesn't match yours.

There were only two children brought into the world from my seed. I wasn't in the delivery room either time. Life was different for men when my children were being born. It was between the "sheets and hot water" and "being allowed in the delivery room" era's. For my second son I am glad he was born in a hospital. He would not have survived a home delivery.

My first son died at three months old. I would not have wanted to survive if my second son had not been born. Most of my second sons birth was visible to me even though I wasn't in the room. When his head crested it was blue so they opened the door to let others in.

My son is grown and gone. Not liking to be alone I started taking young abused mothers in. It started when a young friend had an emergency situation. In each case there have been children involved so they become roommates also.

To date we have taken in six mothers, two fathers (men can be abused too) and a total of 20 children. People coming out of abusive relationships have a lot to learn so they are with us sometimes a year or more. Bn9900 is right even in the role I fill a full nights sleep is not an option most nights.


fordie profile image

fordie 4 years ago from China

Simply brilliant. You made my day


jpcmc profile image

jpcmc 4 years ago from Quezon CIty, Phlippines

Here's antoher reaction to I'm pregnant...I knew it, you're getting fat for no reason...although thatmay be followed by a slap on the face.

I remember the time when we learned we were having a baby - that's not something you can adequately describe but elated and blessed are two that comes to mind. Congratualtions on the hub of the day!


kelleyward 4 years ago

What a fantastic hub for Father's Day. You have some beautiful kids! Thanks for sharing what some of us tend to forget. How important father's are ! Voted up! Congrats for HOTD! Kelley


chamilj profile image

chamilj 4 years ago from Sri Lanka

Congratulations on Hub of the day award! Great Article.


softhard profile image

softhard 4 years ago from Kathmandu

Congratulations for the hub of the day.

Great hub.


Janine Huldie profile image

Janine Huldie 4 years ago from New York, New York

Finally getting a chance to leave a comment and want to thank you for the great hub. As the mother of 2, I related to this on the other end of it, but still quite enjoyed it.


Brite-Ideas profile image

Brite-Ideas 2 years ago from Toronto, Canada

Jimmy there is nothing more beautiful than a dad who is totally invested in his children. A beautiful page, and photos! I have 4 sons, and my husband's love for all the kids is immeasurable. A great page for dads (and moms)

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