How to get a teenager's attention!
When you go grocery shopping, buy only broccoli!
Whatever you do, do not buy pop tarts, potato chips, or pizza! Teenagers have been known to live for six months at a time in their rooms under piles of dirty clothes and dishes and eating nothing but pop tarts, potato chips, and pizza.
When you go shopping, buy only broccoli! When you hear the dreaded question, "Mom, what's for dinner?" or the "What is there to snack on?" You do not have think, well there is chicken, pudding, or jello. Or make up a list that has 14 things for them to reject. You have a set and easy answer: Broccoli. God's healthiest food. This should get the attention of even the most "whatever" kid in the world. After eating nothing but broccoli for at least a month, ask, "Would you like to help with the grocery shopping this week?" The likelihood that you will get his/her attention is high. If you don't, please check for a pulse.
Add a tilting platform to his bed.
When your teen is gone to school one day. That should be happening at least one day a week. Have a tilting platform installed under his bed. The next morning when it is time to get up and you have heard the snooze alarm go off three times, just use the remote control and activate the platform. It happens so fast that the teen is standing up and saying "What the.....?" As he looks around the bed is back to normal and he thinks he just had a paranormal experience. He calls out, "Mom, something weird just happened!" You reply, "Oh, good, you are up early today!" "Hurry down, your Broccoli is getting cold." I think this is going to get his attention for sure.
Oh shuks, the Cable is Out.
Have a off switch installed on the cable. It must be hidden and not used all the time. It works best if most of the entertainment in your home is cable activated: tv, computer, xbox live, etc. You can turn off almost everything with one push of a button. When you hear, "Mom, something is wrong with the cable again," Smile, chuckle and serve another bowl of broccoli soup. You may have company for dinner.
The most vital cyber-hardware-body possession in a teen's arsenal of "I don't need anything else to survive" is his celly. Caution: messing with a teen's celly could result in erratic or dangerous behavior. Texting is a way of staying connected with anyone the teen has ever known.
Don't bother asking "Who are you texting?" There is only a 50-50 chance that it is someone they know. There is more than a 100 percent chance that your simple question will be viewed as as invasion of privacy.
Here you have to establish a tactic that works with teens. Just buy a 'call as you go' cell phone and plan. Be sure to keep it hidden. Text your teens with "Hello, how ya doin?" They will reply immediately. Nothing is intriguing as a stranger who wants to chat. You will now have an unbreakable link to your teen day and night. Next text them when they are in the shower, or in bed. You will be surprised at how easy it is to get their attention. If you want to mess with them, text them when they are in biology or English. They will never resist.
Now you've got their attention what next?
It is a monumental task, but you have done it. You have the teen's attention. It is important to make the most of it. Here are 5 things teens want to hear, but may have trouble hearing:
1. I love you
2. I am proud of you
3. I accept you and I am glad I have you just as you are
4. I want to be close to you, I have your back
5. I am not perfect, forgive me for the dumb stuff I do and say.
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