Lisa Beaman on Parenting and Family

There are so many deep and complex challenges facing families and parents in today’s society. It seems as if every time we turn around there’s a new attack on the values we teach our kids or there’s one more thing for parents to worry about. Watching the news or reading the paper can send terror into the heart of mothers everywhere.

Even though I'm sure that every generation has had it's parenting challenges, the ones we face today are unique and unprecedented. With every new trend we as parents pass through uncharted territory. Between the constant access to technology and continuous pressure of the media, many struggle with balancing parental guidance.

Yet even though our times and culture is changing at a rapid pace, there are still some aspects of parenting that remain the same. Toddlers still scream, busy moms still get overwhelmed and stressed out, parents still struggle trying to make ends meet, and couples still have gaps in communication. The new issues simply compound the original challenges.

As a wife and working mother of three children, I know I don’t have all the answers. I feel as if I learn something new each day. Yet through trial and error during my 19 years of marriage and 17 years of motherhood, I have learned a few things that are worth sharing. I've written several hubs about parenting, family, and marriage.

For the parenting hubs, I’ve put them in groups according to interest. If you have young children, teenagers, or are battling with technology or an over-crowded schedule, you should be able to easily find helpful information. I hope you will take the time to visit some of the hubs outlined below.

Grace-Based Parenting
Grace-Based Parenting

If you find yourself anxious about all of the responsibilities you face as a parent, take some time to read Grace-Based Parenting by Dr. Tim Kimmel. His book presents a whole new way to nurture a healthy family

 

For Parents with Young Children:

Getting Noisy Kids to be Quiet: Kids are noisy! They giggle, scream, yell, laugh, talk, chatter, bang toys, jump, and then giggle some more. Even as they get older, the noise level never really seems to decrease. What help is there for parents who want to get the noisy kids to be quiet? There are several things you can do to control the noise level with your children at home, when riding in the car, when eating at restaurants, or even while visiting the library. The how-to tips found in Loud Children: Getting Noisy Kids to be Quiet will help to relieve stress, bring peace and calm and they are as easy as a whisper. Learn how to calmly get those noisy kids to be quiet!

Simple Rules to Help Kids Obey: Getting children to obey their parents is often overwhelming. Misbehavior and disobedience are common frustrations among parents today. As parents, we all want our kids to be good and well behaved, happy, respectful, and polite. While sometimes a child seems defiant and rebellious, sometimes, they really just aren’t sure what is expected of them. What can moms and dads do to help their kids mind? Read How to Use Simple Rules to Help Kids Obey to find out how establishing simple rules can help parents get their kids to obey. By setting clear boundaries and expectations early, you can set your kids up for success and help them learn to obey.

Revolutionary Parenting: What the Research Shows Really Works
Revolutionary Parenting: What the Research Shows Really Works

Parenting today requires a different approach, a revolutionary approach. I love George Barna's book on Revolutionary Parenting. If you want to be a revolutionary parent, check out this book!

 

For Parents with Teenagers:

Combating Negative Influences: How do you help your child make the right friends? What do you do when your child has a friend that your don’t approve of? How do you respond when you feel your son or daughter is being negatively influenced by someone else? It’s difficult for parents to sit by and watch the values we’ve taught our kids slip away. One of the toughest things about parenting has been combating negative influences. These influences can come from a variety of sources, such as television, radio, internet, extended family, and friends at school. Our job as parents is to help our children navigate through these other influences to help them learn how to make wise choices. How to Combat Negative Influences From Friends will offer some suggestions in helping your child choose friendships wisely, how to respond when you don’t approve of their friends, and what to do when the negative influence takes control.

Parenting through the teen years: Surviving the teen years as a parent can be quite a challenge. Even the best of parents can struggle with their teenagers. Yet these years are so important! Decisions they make now can have huge consequences for their future. Keeping the lines of communication open with your teen can help them learn to make good choices in life. If you are struggling with your teenager, hubs like Surviving Teenagers! How Parents Can Influence Their Kids in the Teen Years and Having Trouble Talking to Teens can give you some suggestions on how to survive these crazy teen years.

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Technology and Parenting

When do you give your child a cell phone? Every child wants one. As parents we’ve all heard the pleas and the arguments. We’ve been told that every other kid at school has one. But how do we decide when our own kids old enough to have their own cell phone? When should parents allow their children to have access to the world at their fingertips? The answer will be different for every parent and every child. When to Give Your Child a Cell Phone: Advice for Parents takes a look at the things that parents should consider before deciding if their kids are ready and includes some suggestions for once they have a phone of their own. If your kids are asking for a phone, this Hub is a must read!

Kids and Social Media: It's tempting for parents shy away from social networking sites such as Facebook. I'm often amazed at who I find on Facebook... and who won't even go near it. Facebook, however, can be used as a valuable parenting tool. Know what your child posts on social networking sites can give parents a glimpse of what's going on in their real social lives. If your child is using social media or is asking for permission to have a Facebook page, read Using Facebook as a Parenting Tool: Social Media Do's and Don'ts for Parents for tips on how to make the most of Facebook and other social networking sites.

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Money Saving Tips

Moms love to save money! Especially now that times are tight, families need all the help we can get. For my family's budget, I try my best to pinch pennies and make those dollars stretch as far as they can go. I'm constantly on the lookout for better ways to save and bargain shop. You can read a few of my hubs on some of the tips and tricks I've learned:


Tips for Busy Moms

Organizing Housework: It’s difficult to balance a career, family and housework! If you don’t have the funds to hire a cleaning lady, then it’s easy for a working mom to be overwhelmed with household responsibilities. Developing some organization, however, will help busy moms with housecleaning chores. With a little preparation, you too can conquer the cleaning and get your kids and family involved! With a few simple tips, you can relieve the stress, have a clean house and find some time to have fun and relax. Be sure to read Organizing Housework: How to Organize Family Chores with Kids for some practical how-to tips on house work organization and delegation.

Preparing Meals: The two most asked questions in my house are, "Is the Dishwasher Clean" and "What's for Dinner?" The dishwasher question is an easy one... but what's for dinner? That one used to make me cringe! Planning meals for your family can get tiring. I used to feel as if I made the same meals over and over and I never really had time to do them right. Coming home after a long day of work, the last thing I wanted to do was cook a big meal. Recently, however, I've learned a few things about freezer cooking. By using the Once a Month Mom blog, I can prepare meals for my family for an entire month on one big cooking day. This makes the question of "what's for dinner?" a lot easier to answer! Read Busy Moms Save Time and Money With Freezer Cooking to see how my experience with the Once a Month Mom cooking system helped organize my day and feed my family good meals.

The Love Dare
The Love Dare

If you are struggling in your marriage or relationship, I highly recommend reading The Love Dare. This book will help give you a new perspective on your self as well as your significant other.

 

Love and Marriage

My husband and I have been married now for 19 years. Through the years we’ve had our ups and downs. Along the way I’ve learned what works and what doesn’t. While no marriage is perfect, these Hubs are written to help others in their relationships.

Keeping score: Have you ever noticed how much more work you do around the house than anyone else? Do you ever look around and wonder why your husband is sitting on the couch while you do the laundry, wash the dishes, or help the kids with homework? When was the last time he appreciated you for what you did? When was the last time he helped out without being asked or nagged? If you are having these feelings, you are not alone. Many women feel the same way and struggle with the same thoughts. In fact, it’s human nature for us to keep track of the offenses. It’s normal for us to keep score. It is human nature, and it’s normal, but it’s not healthy. Read Healthy Marriage Tips: Who's Keeping Score for some ideas of a new way to play the game.

Common mistakes you can avoid: We are surrounded by poor examples of marriage. Television, movies, and commercials are full of dysfunctional couples who make us laugh at their antics. While these marriages may make a great comedy, they give us a terrible example that becomes all too easy to follow. While I believe that deep down we know better, we can easily be misled into believing that this is the way marital relationships should be. When that happens, we can fall into the same trap, making the same mistakes. Read What's Wrong With My Marriage: Common Mistakes Made by Husbands and Wives and to see if you are making any of the commonly made mistakes.

One of the most important things I've learned during my years of marriage and parenting is that jumping to conclusions will get you in trouble every time. Don't be quick to judge other parents for their decisions, don't be quick to get angry with your spouse, and don't be quick to punish your child when you're angry. Moms need to stick together. Moms and Dads need to stay on the same page. And sometimes kids mess up and need to learn from their mistakes.

Thank you so much for reading. I hope you can find something helpful in one of the hubs above. If you enjoyed reading this, please be sure to vote it up! If you have something to add or would like weigh in on these topics, I would enjoy hearing from you in the comment section below. Don't forget to share this hub with your friends!

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13 comments

Cagsil profile image

Cagsil 5 years ago from USA or America

Okay, I know this isn't my type of hub, simply because I'm not a parent and the only family I have is my mother(my sister doesn't count because she wants nothing to do with me, and doesn't want her daughters to have anything to do with me either). But, as per usual, I found your hub very useful to others, who are parents and have family. So with that said, voted up! Marked useful and interesting. That's the best I can do. No insight knowledge on this topic or at least none I'm willing to share, simply because I've no family to speak of and am not a parent. :)


Spacey Gracey profile image

Spacey Gracey 5 years ago from Essex, UK

Thanks for sharing this Cagsil - its a good read. Great work Lisa.


Cagsil profile image

Cagsil 5 years ago from USA or America

Hey Spacey Gracey, what are you talking about? I didn't share this article. At least I don't remember sharing it. Sorry, cannot take credit for doing something I don't remember doing or didn't do. But, I'll agree with you, it's a good read. :) I did "like" it via Facebook link if that's what you were referring to. That much I did do. :) LOL!


lisabeaman profile image

lisabeaman 5 years ago from Phoenix, AZ Author

Thanks Cagsil! I really appreciate your comments... even though your aren't a parent, I really appreciate the vote of confidence. (I'm sorry to hear about your sister)

Thanks Spacey Gracey too! However you found this hub, I appreciate you for taking the time to read it and leave a comment!


Pamela99 profile image

Pamela99 5 years ago from United States

I think you covered many important facets of parenting. I think there is a lot of be learned by reading your hub and rated it very useful.


lisabeaman profile image

lisabeaman 5 years ago from Phoenix, AZ Author

Thanks Pamela! I really appreciate your kind words. I'm glad you found my hub useful. I know how hard parenting can be and I'd really like to be a resource for other parents.


Seafarer Mama profile image

Seafarer Mama 5 years ago from New England

Hi Lisa,

Thanks for this summary of your marriage and parenting hubs. These are the relationships that are the most significant in everyone's world...and the break dysfunctional cycles...especially when extended family have a vested interest in keeping them going...is so difficult. But we keep on going, doing what we feel is best...doing our best to balance reflection and action. :0)

So...great summary hub! :0) And thanks for hooking up with me on LinkedIn. :0)


lisabeaman profile image

lisabeaman 5 years ago from Phoenix, AZ Author

Hello Seafarer Mama! Thanks so much for reading my hub and for the kind words. You're right about our family relationships being the most significant. I'm sure most of us have some dysfunctional cycles we want to break. For me, I tried too hard at first to do everything the opposite of what I'd seen growing up, but that just made things dysfunctional in another way! I had to learn to take the good and get rid of the bad... which sounds like your words of "doing our best to balance reflection and action". Thanks again!


JT Walters profile image

JT Walters 5 years ago from Florida

Hi lisabeanman,

Really great hub and it is so comprehensive. I am sharing this one with my friends hwo have teenagers who struglle fighting over technology.

Vote Up.

JT


lisabeaman profile image

lisabeaman 5 years ago from Phoenix, AZ Author

Thanks JT Walters! I'm so glad you enjoyed it and I hope your friends find some helpful suggestions. Technology really is giving parents new levels of challenges. Thanks for reading & for the vote up! :)


JT Walters profile image

JT Walters 5 years ago from Florida

I did share with my friend and she asked if yu could write a hub on who to hack her daughter's facebook page and I said I doubted it. Apparently, facebook is really giving parents challenges because their children are talking about very private things on facebook.

I never mind voting up good useful articles.

JT


lisabeaman profile image

lisabeaman 5 years ago from Phoenix, AZ Author

Thanks JT... that is a tough one. There's such a fine line between checking on your kids and spying. I'm afraid that hacking into her daughter's facebook would be spying and I would only do that if I feared the worst. It would be much better for your friend to try and talk with her daughter and keep the lines of communication open. It's important for her not to lose her daughter's trust.

You're right though, facebook really can be a challenge! I hope this is one that your friend will overcome. You might want to suggest the hub I wrote about social media. There's a link to it in this hub under "Technology and Parenting" She might find something helpful.

Thanks again!


Jt Walters 5 years ago

Hi Lisabeaman,

I think my firend is concerned that her child is being over expeosed by social media and not being loowed to make the same silly mistakes all children make because hse is doing it so publically. My friend hasn't hacked her daughter's facebook account because of privacy issues but I tell her children under 18 are just that children and we as parents have rights to protect them.

I also think it is important tht our children keep our trust by behaving in public.

Thanks for the addition information. I am certain all parents can use it.

JT

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