Sextexting! Texting! & TEENS!

Keeping The Lines of Communication Open


Sextexting & TEENS


Do you have teens?

Living in this audacious, adventurous 21st century with all its technological advances has its advantages. You can keep the lines of communication open or stay in constant contact with anyone at anytime, just about anywhere in the world. You can call, talk, track or text message when you have the right, GPS system, computer, cell phone, I pod, TV, Smart TV blue tooth ear piece, Nintendo DSI, mobile devices or some other...

How often do you get a text?


On the other hand it is hard for some to just “be” in the moment, because they are always texting and calling someone else while in your presence. Their attention is divided between you and somewhere or some else? The quality of time spent is usually minimized. They have a hard time just being in the moment or giving their undivided attention to what’s going on “right now”. Having the capability to be accessible is great. But I believe it is really getting out of hand. Perhaps there should be some “rules of etiquette ” honored and accountability exercised when alone or while in public or in the presence of others? And what about the teens?


It is difficult being a teenager! You are too young to be a child and not old enough to be an adult! This time will shape the course of your life. Think hard and long before you make choices that will result in lifelong consequences. Wherever you are in life you can begin to choose to be responsible! Know that you are unique and special. You cannot undo anything that has happened. But you can go forward growing in grace, knowledge and wisdom. Enjoy this time and begin to seriously think about what you want to do with the rest of your life! You have the advantage of many technological devices and inventions use them responsibly and wisely. Check out the links at the end of this article as well!


Here are some examples to keep in mind and ponder...


Reina Hardesty is a 13 year old teen, from Southern California, who is an amazing, creative, prolific texter. How she ever managed to get anything else done? She actually sent approximately 500 texts daily that totaled 14,528 text in one month. It is a good thing that her father had unlimited texting. Otherwise, at 20 cents per text his bill would have been somewhere around a whopping $2,900 !!!

I wonder what this does as far as their overall health is concerned? How much time for homework or anything else for that matter? Is texting addicting? At what point is it considered so...


Wait there's more! Emilee Cox, another witty, vivacious, energetic, teen texter of 14 years, has smashed Reina's record. At 74 text per each hour she was awake, she texted over 35,000 text in one month according to Mirror.com News.


Miley Cyrus favorite hobby was going shopping. When she was a teen she also really liked Chinese Food and watching "High School Musical with her sisters. But apparently the once famous teen idol enjoyed texting as well! When she was younger Miley Cyrus and her then older boyfriend Justin were caught texting during Church service. They thought they were being discreet "They were not only busted but..." They both were scolded by her family's pastor.

Update! Miley Cyrus is really changing she is now in her twenties and has moved on to a new beau and another beau... But I think she has went a bit too far in one of her videos what a switch from Hanna Montana? She even grabbed Robin Thicke's crotch on stage. Hmm not really appropriate is it? I wonder how his wife that was in the audience felt? OH MY! This is why boundaries are so important. Hmm after Miley's "twerking" episode at the VMA's she and her fiancé called off the engagement. I think this nice girl needs a behavior check intervention real soon!



Hope Witsell, A young Florida middle schooler at the young age of thirteen hung herself after sending nude photos through sexting! It is alleged she sent the photo in hope to impress a boy. The photo was intercepted by a classmate who shared it with many of her school mates as well as neighboring schools. Hope was surrounded in the hallway and underwent gawking from students at school.

Hope's mother said that she had talked to Hope about proper internet conduct. She set rules and boundaries and restricted her, talked with her and continued to love her! However the peer pressure to be accepted was greater. Hope was dismissed as a school advisor and suspended as well. Hope hung herself in her bedroom. This is one on many unfortunate results due to sexting!


These are just a few examples there are many more! It is important to stress responsibility to your teens when they are allowed to have a cell phone or any other high tech gadget! Remind them that it is a privilege not a necessity.


It is also very important that we keep the lines of communication open with our teenagers. Peer pressure is real. It is becoming increasingly difficult to adhere to a chaste lifestyle or platonic relationship. Abstinence is a safe, dwindling alternative. It is becoming somewhat fashionable to just give in to their sexual urges. Many teens experience acute adolescent anxiety, localized alopecia, acne, anorexia, drug addiction,alcohol, low self esteem, venereal diseases, abuse and panic attacks are on the rise. Therefore Teens are under enormous peer pressure to engage in premarital sexual relationships as well. Resulting in much stress as well as the possible prospect of becoming teenage parents. There is always something lurking to pull them off track. Having a cell phone for emergencies is fantastic! We need to keep the lines of communication open! Yes, we should be concerned! They need constant moments of patience & guidance. The ability to stay in contact is a plus. But here too we also need some “rules of etiquette. ” These 21st century teens have taken texting to a whole new level.

*I KNOW what it is like when your children are away attending the University! I had three attending at one time... Make sure you stay in regular contact. Ask them to check in with you as well! This keeps them connected and in tune with their family values!


Remind them that not everyone they meet on line is who they say they are... Many irresponsible untrustworthy adults are taking advantage of children and teens on line. BE SURE to Warn them about SEXUAL PREDATORS! It is important that they NOT meet anyone they meet on line in person. If they ever do make sure that they are accompanied by a good friend in a public place. It is wise that they take some type of self defense class. You do not have to make them paranoid; just make sure that you do all you can to make them confident in who they are! In this day and age it is ALWAYS wise to be safe!

Here are a few more stats,

*Texting of this nature is nothing new. According to a 2008 Nielsen study, teenagers between the ages of 13 to 17 “text more than any other demographic group” clocking up an average of 1,742 texts a month.

Sextexting is also becoming a growing trend among teens. Sextexting is when revealing photos or messages are sent across a cell phone. It is actually flirting with danger. You do not always know how large or who your audience really is. PLEASE DO NOT DO THIS! Teens that are caught could possibly be prosecuted as sex offenders. Unknowingly they send pictures or messages with improper content that once they have been published they cannot be retrieved. it is just not a good idea to get so personal anyway. It is far better to leave some things for the imagination.... On many occasions they have sent messages to a friend, who sent it to a friend and that friend sent it to … Right now this is even being pursued by some prosecutors to possibly be considered as “child pornography.” So it is important to have a serious chat with them about being careful in this area. Nothing more than "G" rated texting allowed!


Remember to check their phones regularly. This is about keeping them safe from temptations!


Taylor Sauer unfortunately another teen has lost their life due to texting! Taylor Sauer, was a bright, bubbly, fun, delightful, intelligent witty, young lady who graduated with a 3.9 grade average! She was the salutatorian for her graduating class as well as a National Merit Scholar! No doubt that she had a bright future ahead of her! But time would not permit! Her final day came much too soon!

She crashed into a tanker truck while she was texting while going approximately 80 mph! She died instantly! Her cell phone records show that she was texting about every 90 seconds! Her last text was to a friend on face book... She leaves her grieving parents, friends, and love ones to mourn and wonder what could have been! GONE TOO SOON! Her devoted, loving parents are now fighting to help save others...

Please adamantly tell your children, friends and love ones NO TEXTING while driving! Many seem to still think that nothing will happen to them! Too many lives are being lost too many senseless accidents! There is NO EXCUSE! If you are too tired pull over to the side of the road! Then CALL someone for Help!


Oprah Winfrey dedicated a whole television show to the perils of America’s newest “OBSESSION” = texting while driving! Did you know that when you text or use a cell phone while driving you significantly increase the chances of having an accident? It is the equivalent of having 4 drinks while driving! You are driving with a decreased attention span. It is called “Distracted Driving! “ You are not only putting your life in jeopardy but the lives of many others as well! The show is inclusive of many who have experienced the consequences of someone using a cell phone while driving. The statistics of the many casualties are mesmerizing and alarming!

Ms Winfrey asks that everyone designate their car as a ‘”NO PHONE ZONE!” She goes so far to have a campaign asking you to sign a contract agreeing to do so. The contract is available on her website! During the show one mother is interviewed. Her story; As she approaches her home after a Dr.’s appointment she sees a little girl lying in the streets surrounded by a crowd! She sees a mangled bike… Much to her dismay the distraught mother realizes it is her little girl and the emergency crew are attempting to pull her clothes off ……. The little girl was “15 PEDALS “ FROM HER FRONT DOOR! The driver was on her cell phone! After intensive care in the hospital two days later her beautiful little girl dies… This is one of many. This show is a must see it will or might just save your life!

This show is a must see it will save your life!

Texting while driving is also hazardous. No sneaking a text in because no one's watching. Watch the road! Another big, No! No! We need to be in contact but we also need to give them guidelines. I think that a simple contract might possibly be a viable solution. If they are old enough to have a cell phone they should be responsible enough to make a contract that is reviewed often and renegotiated when or if necessary. Limiting their calling by giving them a restricted calling plan? Knowing that you are going to randomly review their messages, Hmmm...This really is to let them know that you care enough to take the time to show that you are concerned and they matter. Of course they won't see it this way...


According to a study by a reporter from the SF Gate at least 15% of teens are sexting on their cell phones and the number is growing... According to the Pew report "8% of 17 year olds are sexting and 30% of teens receive them." They are often in a romantic relationship and do this in lieu of having sexual intercourse...


The statistics are climbing on incidences involving cell phones why driving for teens! Take their phone if necessary rather than allow an accident to hurt, maim or take their life!



Please have a deep thoughtful and meaningful conversation with your teens and tell them not to send any risque, nude or partial nude photos over the internet. Nor should they ever send any explicit texts! As a matter of fact I recommend telling them to not send anything that they do not want their mother or father to see. Once they do their message or photographs become a permanent part of cyberspace. Teens also “hook up” on line with strangers not always knowing who the other person really is; not good. It is important that we keep the lines of communication open. Peer pressure is real no matter what the age they still need love, guidance, love and support from their parents.

Even if it is imposing “tough love” support does not mean letting them just do as they please. It means being there for them and letting them know that you take your role as a parent seriously! You are their parent first, rather you should be. You are not their friend there is a difference. Yes you can be friendly. When they become grown adults you can be their friend. NOW, Do whatever it takes to keep them safe! Including randomly checking their photos and phone messages. This should be a requirement of having the privilege of having a cell phone! This is also how you help them to become more responsible and accountable!



In this high tech society it may be hard. But, keeping the lines of communication open is very important! PRAY with them and PRAY for your teens when they are away! Put them on what I call "GOD WATCH" when they are out of your presence let them know that they are never not in the presence of the LORD! It is crucial and beneficial to make sure that you take the time to spend quality time with them without a television, computer, cell phone, I pod, CD player, blue tooth ear piece or some other distraction… Just maybe they won’t feel the need to take up sextexting?


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Comments 34 comments

no body profile image

no body 7 years ago from Rochester, New York

Parents need to be parents and parent! We need to know what our kids are doing and their friends. Thank you for the great hub.


DeBorrah K. Ogans profile image

DeBorrah K. Ogans 7 years ago Author

You are so right! Thank you as well for taking the time to stop by. Blessings


Cari Jean profile image

Cari Jean 7 years ago from Bismarck, ND

I actually like NOT having a cell phone so that I can't be tracked down!


DeBorrah K. Ogans 7 years ago

Cari Jean,

I agree! Thank you for visiting!

Blessings


MistHaven profile image

MistHaven 7 years ago from New Jersey

As someone who grew up with texting, I know just how potentially dangerous it can be. My parents don't even text at all, so it would have been hard for them to try and educate me on something they knew so little about. But parents need to step up and get to their kids before the problems start arising.


DeBorrah K. Ogans profile image

DeBorrah K. Ogans 7 years ago Author

Misthaven,

Thank you for sharing. Any Parents who see this perhaps they will as you say "step up." I think it is important for parents to monitor the cell phone activities of their children. Even if it requires taking out a manual in order to learn how to find out what's going on! To any parents out there your children are worth the time. Thank you

Blessings


itakins profile image

itakins 6 years ago from Irl

DeBorrah K-

Oh you are so right here about the whole etiquette thing-!-Parents do need to be aware of all the potential risks; kids seem to have cell phones so young,perhaps understandable in today's society,but firm rules need to be laid down,and what's given to them for their safety should not lead to tragedy.

God Bless.


DeBorrah K. Ogans profile image

DeBorrah K. Ogans 6 years ago Author

Itakins, "The whole etiquette thing" is important! I also think that parents should talk with their children/teens on a regular basis to see if the idea of having a cell phone is working or not? They may not like it but this helps them to have structure which they resist somewhat but at the same time is what helps them feel safe! Peer presssure is real! Your love and concern is important to them. Remember they are not grownups no matter how mature they are...

Are they being responsible? Use the cell phone to keep in contact. This is what determines there extra activities... Talk to them about improper texting....

They need to know that having a phone is a privilege that comes with responsibility. Not a requirement! You are quite right the rules need to be firm.

What makes it so difficult is because there are so many parents who don't spend time with their children and let them just do as they please.

If they fail to cooperate then they can just get a phone that only calls home or emergency numbers when they are out and about is another option for a season. Good open communication is really important. One can get creative because each child is different... Thank you for sharing, in His Love & Blessings!


garcilazoand profile image

garcilazoand 6 years ago from Los Angeles, CA

Interesting. As an avid texter myself I find this article fascinating.


DeBorrah K. Ogans profile image

DeBorrah K. Ogans 6 years ago Author

Garcilazoand, Thank you for visiting, please visit again and check out the "Oprah Winfrey" show on texting! Blessings!


habee profile image

habee 6 years ago from Georgia

This is getting totally out of hand! Thumbs up!


DeBorrah K. Ogans profile image

DeBorrah K. Ogans 6 years ago Author

Habee, Yes it really is! Thank you for stopping by! Blessings!


april 6 years ago

whooo texting isn't a crime gosh but sex texting is you guys nedd to stop


drpastorcarlotta profile image

drpastorcarlotta 6 years ago from BREAKOUT MINISTRIES, INC. KC

It seems to take up so much of your time texting!! I rather just dial!! lol, lol, This hub is very excellent DeBorrah but my heart goes out to the teens in this world, one trial after another they face! I just prayer for a covering of the Lord and protection over them and us as well! It's very dangerous out here driving, not knowing if the person coming the other direction is texting!! Be Blessed my love!


DeBorrah K. Ogans profile image

DeBorrah K. Ogans 6 years ago Author

DrPastorcarlotta, You are right about the teens they are faced with so much! The teens and children are our future! I think it is important to reach out to them... They need all the help they can get! So much spiritual warfare about them...Yes! Yes praying for their protection is a wonderful idea!

You are so right about the driving! Whenever we step out our front door we must ask the Lord that His ministering angels surround us!

May the Lord's Favor and protection rest upon you as you/we go forth in encouraging others to come to Jesus Christ!

Much Love & Blessings to you as Well! Have a Great & Marvelous week!


Dchosen_01 6 years ago

THis is an eye opening hub...

Parents need to step up really... Moreso that children are getting smarter and smarter everyday. Gone are those days when you give birth to a child and it takes 3days to even a week to open its eyes. Now, kids open their eyes some hours immediately after birth. It shows signs of increase in smartness. Hubs like yours are already equipping me to becoming a responsible parent someday, I am looking forward to reading more of your hubs..


DeBorrah K. Ogans profile image

DeBorrah K. Ogans 6 years ago Author

Dchosen_01 You are so right parents do need to step up! Children are getting smarter but being left alone more and more without adult supervision. With all the latest technological gadgetry at their disposal leaving them with additional things to get into… Children need love, parental interaction, structure and good boundaries. The fact that you are thinking in advance is great! Nothing can ever take the place of a good conscientious parent!

Thank you for stopping by to share your wonderful insight. Please do come again! in HIS Love, Peace & Blessings!


PegCole17 profile image

PegCole17 6 years ago from Dallas, Texas

Recently there was a news story on the growing epidemic of sleep deprivation in teens. Since cell phones are active 24/7 many teens are texting and talking to their friends during the night missing out on important developmental sleep. I agree with needing a set of guidelines and etiquette for our new evolving techno world but who will follow it? How can parents advocate and enforce rules if they don't follow them?

Enjoyed reading your thoughts on this important topic.


DeBorrah K. Ogans profile image

DeBorrah K. Ogans 6 years ago Author

Pegcole, Thank you for bringing up an EXCELLENT point! I think it is important for parents to think “Discipline” rather than Punishment! You want to help them at this point to learn how to “SELF CORRECT” their behavior and take responsibility for their actions! There are so many influences to pull them in every direction… You cannot be with them every moment of the day nor do you really want to. While they are still minors you really want to help them become stronger in who they are as an individual and encourage whatever natural gifts and talents they have.

Having a phone that has limited functions to exchange with them when they mismanage or abuse their privileges on their phone is an option. Requiring them to check in with you at a designated time! After a period of time they can regain the responsibility of having their own phone… Monitoring the websites they visit and enforcing a curfew on what time they must be home as well as how late they can log off the computer…. Don’t make rules if you can’t or do not plan to reinforce them. It is important to be consistent! It requires sacrifice and discipline on parents as well… But just think about it; that is what parenting is all about! It is only for a season and this time goes by really fast!

Your input here will be helpful to others! Thank you for taking the time to stop by and share. Please do come again! In His Love, Peace & Blessings!


stars439 profile image

stars439 5 years ago from Louisiana, The Magnolia and Pelican State.

Very interesting hub about texting. How do they ever get anything done I wonder. So busy texting. God Bless You Mr's Deborrah and you wonderful family.


DeBorrah K. Ogans profile image

DeBorrah K. Ogans 5 years ago Author

Stars, Texting is quite interesting! There is a growing obsession... I think that it is important for parents to helo them learn a balance... Thank you for stopping by to share, In HIS Love, Grace, Joy, Peace & Blessings to You & your family as well!


sweetie1 profile image

sweetie1 5 years ago from India

Hi DeBorrah K. Ogans ,

We call that SMS and i see everyone is doing it all the time. One hand would always be busy even if they are talking to you or someone one else. I dont know the health effects but i sure dont like anyone sending SMS while talking to me.


DeBorrah K. Ogans profile image

DeBorrah K. Ogans 5 years ago Author

Hi Sweetie, Welcome as always!

Yes! It is really becoming quite interesting. I think it is impacting the quality of relationships everywhere! Too often when you are with someone they are texting or calling someone else.... Their attention then becomes divided and they cannot focus on being in the moment!

What does the SMS stand for?


Exmoor 5 years ago

Great article, but you labelled it as sextexting and teens. I have a suggestion. If you label your article something, stick to that subject. Your article should have been completely about sexting, as it is now being called.


DeBorrah K. Ogans profile image

DeBorrah K. Ogans 5 years ago Author

Exmoor, I am glad you liked the article. However the article is about Sextexting & TEENS. It goes further to explain what is happening in the lives of TEENS! Peace & Blessings!

Have you changed the title of my article somewhere else?


zduckman profile image

zduckman 5 years ago

Great hub!!! we just had a discussion about the legal implications of "sexting" in my psychology class ...fascinating. I am a huge proponent of leaving your phone at home...or at least in the car. Use it more like an answering machine....cut the cord...YOU are in control


DeBorrah K. Ogans profile image

DeBorrah K. Ogans 5 years ago Author

zduckman, I think that the cell phone is used quite excessively by many ... However I think it is a great way to keep in contact with your teens. Calling them or having them call you at an agreed time can possibly lessen peer pressure... It also helps them become more responsible for their time. Thank You for sharing, Peace & Blessings!


Dolores Monet profile image

Dolores Monet 5 years ago from East Coast, United States

I am just glad that my own kids missed this whole texting thing. It's sad and pathetic that such young kids are into such inappropriate behavior.


DeBorrah K. Ogans profile image

DeBorrah K. Ogans 5 years ago Author

Dolores. I am thankful that I did not have to endure this while raising my children as well! But I do have some grandchilren who are coming along that I remain prayerful for. Yes it is sad... But I think parents must make it a point to regularly check their teens phone activities and make sure that they are remaining responsible. Like it or not that is a part of parenting this new technology makes "keeping the lines of communication open a lot easier...

Thank you for sharing, Peace & Blessings!


ubanichijioke profile image

ubanichijioke 5 years ago from Lagos

what a great way of exposing the dangers of the 21st century. Parents need be on guard so that their children do not dive into danger's way. All the issues discussed are quite relevant and does concern not only youths but adults as well. However, parents must be awake cos the syndrome called 'sextexting' is really taking over the stage. Sextexting is profane, disgusting & surely results in problems...

Thanks so much for this 'wonder' hub


DeBorrah K. Ogans profile image

DeBorrah K. Ogans 5 years ago Author

ubanichijioke, Thank you for sharing your encouraging, candid, honest and helpful comments! It is important that we all are mindful of the dangers and perils of "sextexting!"

Our teens especially in this day and age are in need of much help to navigate through these interesting times... They most defintitely need more responsible role models as well! You are so welcome and please do come again, Peace & Blessings!


Alladream74 profile image

Alladream74 5 years ago from Oakland, California

This I believe, is the curse of technology.Kids nowadays have minds that can multi-process. Yes they probably can do several tasks at one time but the danger lies within the environment they are in, from lack of attention on the streets,prone to the danger of sexual acts prematurely realized and the stranger on the other side onf the line.

Unfortunately,it is an uphill battle for parents to get up to speed with young minds that catch on so fast,I am not a parent so I can not prescribe any remedies, but i do think that a new way of parenting should be devised actively if the balance is to be achieved.


DeBorrah K. Ogans profile image

DeBorrah K. Ogans 5 years ago Author

Alladream, Your warranted observations are interesting!

I believe that technology has made extraordinary advancements that are beneficial worldwide. However I also believe that the parameters that protects our fleeting privacy and online security are terribly lacking in comparison! Our children and teens are bombarded by peer pressure and suffer greatly from the lack of parental supervision and cell phone irresponsiblities. Therefore I believe that parents should make a cognizant effort to monitor the cell phone and internet activities of their children and teens! If teens knew that their cell phone an online actitivies would be evalutated and monitored weekly to determine continued usuage this would help them to become more responsible! There are too many predators as well as unsupervised children who fall into folly and mayhem...

As you so wonderfully state "it is an uphill battle for parents to get up to speed..."

Thank You for stopping by to share, In HIS Love, Peace & Blessings!


Ron 4 years ago

This is very interesting post, I like your fantastic hub!

best regards,

Ron from Fitness http://www.intervalstraining.net

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