Women........Teach The Younger Women In Your Life To Be The Best They Can Be

Women

There was a TV ad for a perfume that went something like this, "I can bring home the bacon, fry it up in a pan, and never let you forget that you're a man, cause I'm a woman, W-O-M-A-N." For the most part, that describes the role of a woman today. Think about it, the days of women being able to stay home and take care of home and family are all but a thing of the past. I'm not saying it's not done anymore, however there are a fortunate few, and they are just that, a few. The norm is that a woman must be the bread winner, or at least a contributor , and still carry herself like a lady. You might think chauvinism, but let's face it, it is what it is. Of course, being a wife and mother is not all a woman should aspire to be. Growing up in my day, being a wife and mother was the aspiration of the majority. However, today, there are many career choices, and paths that women choose, and those too are to be celebrated.

Women are said to have to work twice as hard to get half as much as a man. While learning that, life's lesson, we must not forget that we are still expected to be a lady. Being a lady is nothing to be ashamed of, womanhood is to be celebrated, not denigrated. That being said, what can we do as older women to help our younger counter parts, realize that fact and celebrate it?

The state of womanhood today

The state of womanhood today leaves a lot to be desired. It's too bad that, through the proliferation of sexually oriented material, the negative attitude of some men toward women, the absence of quality training at home, low self esteem, and the lack of pride, some of our young women have all but lost their way. For instance, some lack a sense of dignity, and decency, hence their style of clothing, attitude, and mannerism. Meaning the provocative style of dress, leaving practically nothing to the imagination. Their hardened attitude, seemingly not caring about anyone or anything. Hence the reason some young women remain in the news, displaying that very attitude. Let's not forget the relationship between each other. Relationships between women often suffer greatly, just in the process of the day to day living. Not to mention the competition among them.

Low self esteem, and lack of pride is a major contributor of why some young women are experiencing difficulties in their lives today. For this reason some allow themselves to be denigrated by their male counterparts. It seems that they don't know what the word no means, especially in their relationships with men. Spousal abuse runs rampant, either, physically, verbally or emotionally. Because physical abuse has visible signs, and the effects are readily apparent, it might appear that it is the worse form of abuse. However, the unseen verbal, and emotional abuse takes a heavier toll on the human spirit than any physical weapon ever could. It's been said, words are like bullets, once they're out of the mouth, irreparable damage is done, and with the repeated campaign of such, self esteem and pride are all but forgotten.

How older women can help

Changing ones self is very hard, changing someone else is next to impossible. So, we're not focusing entirely on change, however, when that happens it is welcomed. What we want to do is help our young ladies see that they have choices in their lives. For instance choices concerning the decisions they make as to how they live their lives, the paths they take, and what they ultimately choose to be, and do. They need to know that their future is entirely in their hands. They also need to know that pride, self esteem, and self sufficiency should be among the positive qualities they should strive for. We have to set the bar high for them, and help them get over it.

Mothers, aunts, grandmothers, older sisters, female teachers, etc, we must examine how we react to various situations in our lives, for instance, how do we allow men to treat us? How much respect do we show to our male counterpart? What is our attitude towards our "sisters?" What is our manner of speech? When it comes to working relationships with men are we competitive to a fault. How do we dress? Just how do we carry ourselves in general?

In answer to those questions, we must honestly examine ourselves, and answer accordingly. Are we so desperate to have a man in our lives that we will accept any treatment that's meted out. Could we, perhaps, show our young women what it would be like to take charge of our lives, and maybe, just maybe spend some time alone, or at the very least not let that particular man in our lives control our every action.

Concerning our attitude toward both genders, are we showing respect? Could we, not always be in competition, sometimes working along side, and not always having to win? What about showing respect to our male counterparts, and our "sisters" at all times? Oh yes, and, our speech, is it the kind that we would not be ashamed to hear uttered from our young women? Even if our language is not always what we would like it to be, could we perhaps, not use it around them.

Let's address, our dress, (a little play on words), proper decorum, despite popular opinion, is not out of date. Our attire, at times, tend to dictate how we are treated, by both sexes. At times it even dictates how we ourselves act. In all that's been discussed, consider the saying, "you can lead a horse to water, but you can't make him drink." Let's not worry about making them drink, (change), just lead them in the right direction, and let them choose for themselves, after proper guidance, how they will ultimately live their lives


Conclusion

So, to reiterate, what we do, and how we act can go a long way in setting an example for our young ladies, on what their eventual outcome can be as a responsible member of society. Help them to see that pride, and self esteem are qualities that should be essential parts of their makeup, and that self sufficiency is a goal to which they should strive to attain. May we take the lead in helping them realize their full potential, and never stop believing in themselves about what they can accomplish, alone or in concert with another. So in essence, older women, take your responsibility seriously, and teach the young women in your lives to be all that they can be.

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Comments 71 comments

\Brenda Scully 7 years ago

hi lovely hub as always..... you are sooooo wise


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create a page 7 years ago from Maryland, USA

fastfreta you did it again. Congratulations for a job well done. You have chosen what I deem to be a very difficult topic to write on without being personal. Keep up the great work. Now the elders, women, men, young adults and children have no excuse. Everyone was addressed.


fastfreta profile image

fastfreta 7 years ago from Southern California Author

Thanks, Brenda and create a page for stopping by.


alittlebitcrazy profile image

alittlebitcrazy 7 years ago

Heck ya, freta! I am woman, hear me roar! Men who think we are any less than equal or superior are living in a delusional world!


fastfreta profile image

fastfreta 7 years ago from Southern California Author

Thank you alittlebitcrazy, for stopping by and reading the newest hub. Come back again soon.


BkCreative profile image

BkCreative 7 years ago from Brooklyn, New York City

Hi fastfreta!

I do take my role as an elder woman quite seriously - and I love it!

Fortunately, I had a mother who thought women were the best thing that ever happened - and a father who agreed! It was truly an advantage to grow up with a mother who thought so highly of womanhood - and had a great opinion of herself.

Thanks for this hub to remind us to lead by example! No excuses!


fastfreta profile image

fastfreta 7 years ago from Southern California Author

Hip, hip, hooray for your parents. Seriously they are to be celebrated, because to have one parent be that supportive is good, but to have two, was, I'm sure, the greatest. You were very blessed BK with parents like yours. Thanks for sharing that with us.


Feline Prophet profile image

Feline Prophet 7 years ago from India

I think older women should also steer the young men in their families in the right direction so they learn how to treat women right. :)


bingskee profile image

bingskee 7 years ago from Quezon City, Philippines

interesting hub. it is really necessary that older women should guide the younger ones. except for some exemptions where it is the adult women who are being taken care of and guided.


fastfreta profile image

fastfreta 7 years ago from Southern California Author

I totally agree bingskee with your assessment, because sometimes that is the case.


James Ginn profile image

James Ginn 7 years ago from Ohio

Enough cannot be said about mentoring. It does not ALWAYS have to be about the elder passing wisdom on to the fledgling. My Pastor is ten years younger than me and we are in a mentoring relationship. I yearn for his wisdom and thank you for yours.


fastfreta profile image

fastfreta 7 years ago from Southern California Author

Thank you James, it's so true, so often we don't give credit where credit is due. Thanks again for stopping by, come again soon.


BJC profile image

BJC 7 years ago from Florida

You are awesome!! God has been putting on my heart to work with young women to build their self-esteem and be dependent on themselves. As I tell my female students - middle schoolers are not like we remember middle schoolers - finsih school then you are in a position to make more intelligent choices.

Love it - keep it up!!

BJC


fastfreta profile image

fastfreta 7 years ago from Southern California Author

Thank you very much BJC, you inspire me to continue on in this new journey of mine. Thanks for stopping, come back again soon.


Bail Up ! profile image

Bail Up ! 7 years ago

Very well said, Amen !


fastfreta profile image

fastfreta 7 years ago from Southern California Author

Thanks guys for stopping by, please come back again soon!


FRANCES4ES profile image

FRANCES4ES 7 years ago from DC

Hi Fastfreta. Just kind of stumbled upon your hub this morning. Glad I did. What a great topic. I agree with you totally. Hope that the young people (young ladies, in particular) realize how important your message is and try to take heed to it. Keep up the good works!


fastfreta profile image

fastfreta 7 years ago from Southern California Author

Thank you FRANCES4ES, for stopping by, and thank you for your validation of my hub, please come again soon.


ladydijay 7 years ago

I feel so sorry for the young women today. That is in general, there are those who do make a success of their lives. There are many who are in need of help though. There is room for all of us females too help one another on this highway to life.


fastfreta profile image

fastfreta 7 years ago from Southern California Author

So true ladydijay, may we take our responsibility seriously and do just that, help.


deestew profile image

deestew 7 years ago from Kentucky

This is just a reminder that young ladies are watching us. It is truly the fulfillment of Titus 2:2-4 does talk about the older women teaching the younger women. As an older woman I haven't always wanted to teach...I have to be honest but I know that whether I want to or not, I am teaching those who are watching. The key question I must ask myself is what am I teaching? Great Hub.


fastfreta profile image

fastfreta 7 years ago from Southern California Author

I agree, deestew, sometimes without a word, we can teach, so we must always watch our actions around our younger counterparts. Thanks for stopping by, please come again.


DynamicS profile image

DynamicS 7 years ago from Toronto, Canada

fastfreta, thanks for an hub well written and timely. You are so right about the state of our young people. I have been speaking with my daughters friends ever since they were in middle school about RESPECT. Giving it and receiving respect of self as well.

I must say that I am proud of them because they are all responsible, independent and ambitious young people. They know what they want in life and will not accept less in their personal lives or otherwise. I hope that they can be mentors for others.

Thanks for writing about such important topic...


fastfreta profile image

fastfreta 7 years ago from Southern California Author

Thanks DynamicS, you, your daughters and their friends are very fortunate that they have learned these lessons, encourage them to mentor as they get older and even now.


roseanda 7 years ago

hey that was great reading right there. I have enjoyed ur wise words and hope to read something else of urs soon. hey why dont u take a look at mine it's under roseandab and relationships and why do we need them. Then I have another one that I would like u to read and it at roseandab.blogspot.com. I want ur opinions. u remind me of someone special that I know.


fastfreta profile image

fastfreta 7 years ago from Southern California Author

Thanks roseanda, I will go over to your hub. Thanks for stopping by, come again soon.


Shalini Kagal profile image

Shalini Kagal 7 years ago from India

It's such a pleasure reading your hubs fastfreta - yes, it's so important that older women help younger ones to realise their full potential. Very often, you find this happening in families, passed down from one generation to the next so perhaps it was leading by example. For the women who weren't as fortunate, maybe becoming older is the time to see how they can change the course of things and not let history repeat itself because more often than not, women are women's worst enemies!


Silverlining profile image

Silverlining 7 years ago from Port Elizabeth

Some really great advice! By the way I'm one of those mommies who decided to stay at home with my baby...And I wont let anyone make me feel bad about it, I think its the best thing any mom can do for their child! ;-)


trish1048 profile image

trish1048 7 years ago

A wonderful hub. I was blessed with a wonderful mother and grandmother, who both greatly influenced who I am today.

This hub is a great reminder to all females. It could well apply to the males out there as well.


fastfreta profile image

fastfreta 7 years ago from Southern California Author

Thank you Shalini, Silverlining, and trish1048, for those wonderful comments, which could have been added to my hub, so now by extension, through your comments they will. I hope others read your comments.


ashleyr24 7 years ago

Wow Fastfreta you have a lot of encouragement on this Hub. A lot of what has already been said is what I wanted to say. Thank you very much for this Hub, it has inspired me to get out there and mentor some of the young ladies in my life! Keep it up, can't get enough of you!


fastfreta profile image

fastfreta 7 years ago from Southern California Author

Aw, thank you ashleyr, I always appreciate hearing from you. Please come back soon.


Tom Cornett profile image

Tom Cornett 7 years ago from Ohio

Very wise....I should have read this hub first before I commented on your hub about young men. You have a wonderful insight....blessings! :)


fastfreta profile image

fastfreta 7 years ago from Southern California Author

Thanks Tom, I thought you would find this one to be an answer to your thoughts on young women. Thanks for stopping by. Please come back again!


Annie83 profile image

Annie83 7 years ago from houston, tx

sadly nowadays the younger generation dont see anything wrong with what they do.. They think its sexy to flaunt their "goodies". i like your wisely writen hub. this is my first hub read since i just created a profile. Looking forward to reading more of your hubs.


fastfreta profile image

fastfreta 7 years ago from Southern California Author

Thank you Annie 83, for stopping by, and I can't agree with you more. Please stop by again soon.


drpastorcarlotta profile image

drpastorcarlotta 7 years ago from BREAKOUT MINISTRIES, INC. KC

I am loving this HUB!!! True what James Ginn said, wisdom can come in all walks of life young and old! Very NICE! Blessings to you and much love.


fastfreta profile image

fastfreta 7 years ago from Southern California Author

Thank you drpastorcarlotta for you comment. Come back again soon.


Useful Knowledge 7 years ago

Very well written. This is a great hub and it broings out the forgotten points of values and morals that society has lost.


fastfreta profile image

fastfreta 7 years ago from Southern California Author

Thank you so much Useful Knowledge for your comments and compliments. Please come back again soon.


DeBorrah K. Ogans profile image

DeBorrah K. Ogans 7 years ago

Excellent Hub fastfreta,

Full of wisdom and sound advice. We really need to hold up a standard for the younger women and some of the older one's too. Today just about anything goes.

It was not by accident I came across this hub. I am most thankful that I was blessed with a Mother who was a "Grand" lady! Solid morals and values makes a very interesting package that merits respect as well as it gives it.

Again Thank you. You are an inspiration. I will visit often

Blessings


fastfreta profile image

fastfreta 7 years ago from Southern California Author

Thank you DeBorrah for stopping by. I appreciate your inspirational comments. Please come back again soon.


Lady_E profile image

Lady_E 7 years ago from London, UK

An important Hub. We all have a responsibility to do this and not only to our loved ones but to young ones we meet outside. (We might never meet them again, but a positive seed has been planted).

You are my Oprah on Hubpages. ((Hugs)). :)


fastfreta profile image

fastfreta 7 years ago from Southern California Author

Why, thank you Lady E. I also admire you and your writings. Looks like we have a mutual admiration society going on here. Please come back soon.


annb106 profile image

annb106 7 years ago

That is a true statement and a must in order for the younger generation of women the realize their potential.

Barbara


fastfreta profile image

fastfreta 7 years ago from Southern California Author

Thank you annb106, for stopping by, please come again soon.


habee profile image

habee 6 years ago from Georgia

This is GREAT advice! I try to be a strong female role model for my daughters and their friends.


fastfreta profile image

fastfreta 6 years ago from Southern California Author

Thanks habee, judging from your hubs, no doubt you are succeeding in your attempts. Thanks for weighing in on this one, hope to see you soon.


dawnM profile image

dawnM 5 years ago from Camarillo, CA

Hi fastfreta, so true what you said, and how lucky the few children left that can actually have a mom home for the first five years of their life, with a home cooked meals, a good breakfast in the moring, and someone to tuck them in at night and read them stories, what happened to those days. I thank my lucky stars for my mom and dad and the fact that I had that growing up and I was able to at least give that to my kids in the early years. Great hub and nice to have met you in Hollywood!


fastfreta profile image

fastfreta 5 years ago from Southern California Author

Thank you so much dawnM for stopping by and taking the time to leave an encouraging comment. Again, nice to put a real face to the name at Hub Camp. Hope to see you again soon.


jessicab profile image

jessicab 5 years ago from Alabama

I teach my daughters to be independent and do not depend on a boyfriend, or even a husband, and to be strong. I just had a scam ran on me in my religion,some one was trying to trick into a marriage, but when I realize what was happpening I stop being that person friend who was trying to scam me into a marriage with his. But long story and maybe I will write a hub about.


fastfreta profile image

fastfreta 5 years ago from Southern California Author

What an experience, glad to hear that you were able to get free. It's good that you are training your daughter, I'm sure she'll appreciate it in the long run.


Mighty Mom profile image

Mighty Mom 4 years ago from Where Left is Right, CA

As usual, FF, you hit the hard truth right between its overly made up eyes. I agree with everything you've said here (surprise, surprise!). I had not thought on a formal basis of the need for us women of a certain age to take action to reinforce real self-esteem and self-confidence in younger women. And that also includes (IMHO) teaching our sons and grandsons to value and respect women!!

A bit late on seeing this, but rating it up and ESSENTIAL! (ok, there's no "essential" button, so I'll just go with AWESOME!). Keep up the great hubbing, FF, MM


fastfreta profile image

fastfreta 4 years ago from Southern California Author

Coming from a real true writer, I'm humbled to say the least. Thank you so much MM for your encouragement. By the way I did write one to the fellows, about something similar. Oh that touch about the "overly made up eyes," was cute.

In the midst of a somewhat dry writing spell I decided to tweak some of my older hubs, and release them for my new followers, since when I wrote most of these, I only had a few hundred followers. And so many of them have hundreds of followers on Facebook, and Twitter, I might have a better chance of being read now than before.

Anyway, thank you so much for stopping by, and reading this one and taking the time to leave a comment. I'll see you soon.


perfectperception profile image

perfectperception 4 years ago from USA

Perfect!


fastfreta profile image

fastfreta 4 years ago from Southern California Author

Thank you perfectperception.


Wooded 4 years ago

What a wonderful hub. Such an important message you have shared here - Voted up - Thanks!!! =D


fastfreta profile image

fastfreta 4 years ago from Southern California Author

Thank you so much Wooded, now if it could just get to the right people, (smile).


nina64 profile image

nina64 4 years ago from chicago, Illinois

Hello Fasfreta, you have done it again!!!! Reading this hub just made me realize how fortunate I am to be blessed with raising a daughter. Our young women today are faced with so many challenges in our society. It seems as if there is a constant need for competition and validation. It is my hope to teach my daughter to have self respect and a healthy self esteem about herself. I know that she will face a lot of obstacles in her life, but she knows that I'm always available to help her to get through any situation. I tell my daughter everyday that I love her and want only the best for her. With those words, I hope that she will grow to be the person she is called to be. Beautiful hub!!!!!!


fastfreta profile image

fastfreta 4 years ago from Southern California Author

What a beautiful and heartfelt comment. You almost made me cry. Nina, I hope your daughter knows how fortunate she is to have a mother like you. Thank you so much for stopping, please, please do stop again.


Ask TeTe profile image

Ask TeTe 3 years ago from Pennsylvania

Hi FastFreta! I am new to hub pages and am perusing around the site. This is a wonderful article!!! I believe we teach others more than we realize by example. A few years back, I had a gentleman mention to me that I was a lady. I said of course, I'm a female. He said no, I'm not referring to your gender, but to how you act. Your mother must have taught you to act like a lady which is becoming less and less common with each generation. I never thought about how I was raised until then. His comment made me so thankful to have such a wonderful mother and I hope to follow in her footsteps with my own daughter. Thank you for writing such a beautiful Hub!!!


fastfreta profile image

fastfreta 3 years ago from Southern California Author

Well, first of all TeTe, welcome to the sight, I hope you enjoy it here as much as I do.

It's so nice to see to that there are still ladies left in the world. Too bad that some young women today don't see the importance of comporting themselves as such. Hooray for you, and your mother, I wish more mothers would see the importance of home training.

Thanks for the comment, please pass the article on to whomever you meet that could benefit from it.


Ask TeTe profile image

Ask TeTe 3 years ago from Pennsylvania

Will do, your article is beautifully written!

Let me know if you like the pesto, it's one my favorites! I make a few extra batches in the summer to freeze so it can be enjoyed it all winter long.

I don't know what pinning is, but if it's a good thing, thank you.


fastfreta profile image

fastfreta 3 years ago from Southern California Author

Thank You! Oh I will let you know.

At the beginning of the article to the right it says "Pin it" in red. However you have to have a Pinterest account to Pin it. You get that by clicking it and signing up. It's very easy and it is the newest and hottest thing on the web as far as Social Networking is concerned.


Ask TeTe profile image

Ask TeTe 3 years ago from Pennsylvania

Oh, ok, I will check it out...thanks!!!


Frangipanni profile image

Frangipanni 3 years ago

Brilliant hub! Thanks for sharing fastfreta, I love your style. Voted up and following. Have a nice day


fastfreta profile image

fastfreta 3 years ago from Southern California Author

Thanks Frangipanni for stopping and taking time to leave a comment.


Mary Merriment profile image

Mary Merriment 3 years ago from Boise area, Idaho

This is a beautiful article. All too often I see more and more girls and women losing their way. Most simply do not seem to understand how to balance independent strength with femininity.

I enjoy your articles very much. They are filled with such inspiration and wisdom.


fastfreta profile image

fastfreta 3 years ago from Southern California Author

Thanks Mary for stopping, I've been off the grid lately, and haven't paid a lot of attention to my site. I'm back now, at least for awhile. I so appreciate your attention to this article, and for taking time to leave this wonderful comment.


Thundermama profile image

Thundermama 3 years ago from Canada

What an absolute treat to find such a magnificent writer on HubPages! Every word you wrote resonated with me as I try to parent my three girls. I love the concept that it is a job for all of the women in a family to model and discuss what it is to be a woman. Voted up and shared!


fastfreta profile image

fastfreta 3 years ago from Southern California Author

Thanks Thundermama, you're too nice. Thanks for taking time to read and leave a comment. I'll be back over and read more soon,

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