When a "FATHER" Becomes a "DAD" (Happy Father's Day!)

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MY FATHER (by Yehuda Amichai)

The memory of my father is wrapped up in
white paper, like sandwiches taken for a day at work.

Just as a magician takes towers and rabbits
out of his hat, he drew love from his small body,

and the rivers of his hands
overflowed with good deeds.

____________________________________

I have kept this poetry deep inside my heart since I first came across it years ago. As a child who grew up and spent almost all my life having to live with the fact that my own father needs to be away almost all the time, I somehow feel comfort with the magic rhymes of the poem. It never fails to make me realize that physical absence will never be a reason of not having the chance to be loved and cared for by my own dad.

Time slips too fast, yet I would often wish to be a little girl again, who could just ask dad to carry me on his shoulders so that I could see the world at a higher angle. Who could just call dad and put some bondage on my wounded leg, or just run to him and have a big hug each time I am emotionally hurt.

I grew up looking at other children who spent their every dinner with their father, and at times, I wish I was like them. And I just find myself reading this poem again as I say my most fervent prayer that I could be physically there with my dad always.

But God is good all the time. And I am always thankful for all the times that my dad is physically here with us. And I find it even more magical to always feel his presence in those times that he is away. He never fails to give us a call and we spend long hours chatting and sharing our every day. And suddenly, this little child in me realizes that her dad may be physically away, but he was and will never be absent for a day.

As I look at other children now, I never wish to be just like them anymore. Looking back at life, there are many fathers out there who are always physically present, yet they never know their children as much as my dad knows his. There are fathers who could have all his time spending quality times with his kids, yet they fail to appreciate their presence. There are fathers who watched their children achieve in almost everything, yet they never show how proud they are. There are fathers who know so much, even knowing the colors of the neckties of famous man like Benjamin Franklin or Bill Gates, but have not even known the color of his own child’s eyes. There are fathers who are expert lecturers of how the heart beats yet he does not know his own child’s emotional state.

My dad is always there to uplift his children in their most trying times, and he is always there to share their victory. He is always proud of what his children could ever be, never minding if it was his dream for them to have it or not. What truly matters to him is that his children choose what makes them happy without ruining their own life. He never fails to give expedient moral and emotional support all the time. He has his own dreams for his children but he never fails to always be there even if his children choose the path that he did not expect. He manage to be there no matter how near or far the distance could get.

And, suddenly, at this moment, I JUST FEEL MUCH MORE THAN BLESSED WITH A SUPER DAD WHO MANAGES TO BE AROUND DESPITE DISTANCE AND TIME.

______________________________________________

"My father didn't tell me how to live; he lived, and let me watch him do it."(Clarence Budington Kelland)

My dad has taught me so many things about life that no book or any other human being have taught me. I was an instructor and I spent most of the time talking in front of my students yet deep in my heart I know that I could never be the wonderful and most effective teacher like my dad. He taught me facts about life, and I could share some:

  • To be humble and to never fight back with sharp hands and tongue.
  • To control my temper in my most temperamental moment.
  • To fight back if I truly need to, but before doing it, I have to think it over a thousand times if it will just make me look and feel bad.
  • To fight back with grace and courage.
  • To do worthwhile things to achieve my dreams rather than to spend time talking bad at the back of others.
  • To keep in mind the adage that says, “Cast no dirt into the well that gives you water.”
  • To artfully fight for my rights with assertion and trying my best not to be aggressive.
  • To be the best of who I truly am to others that I expect to be true to me.
  • To keep competing to no one else but MYSELF to have a good life.
  • To never insult anyone whether in public or not, for if one insults the other, he is putting no one else down but HIMSELF.
  • To never exchange dignity and prestige for money and other material gains.
  • To always keep my feet on the ground no matter what I achieve in life because broken ribs and fractured skull are hard to mend and is truly painful. And that I have to keep in mind that arrogance is a “health hazard” and outright “deadly”.
  • To make other people do what is best not because they fear of being humiliated and do the right things out of love and respect.
  • Most of all, to put GOD FIRST in everything that I do even if it means having to sacrifice my own life.

Of course, this is not even a handful of what my dad has taught me, it will literally take me a life time to put them all together here, but what I could say is that, if I have another life time to live and get the chance to choose my own father I WILL NEVER FAIL TO CHOOSE MY DAD.

"One father is more than a hundred schoolmasters." (George Herbert)

"The memory of my father is wrapped up in white paper, like sandwiches taken for a day at work...."

I take with me in a clear view the memory of my dad whether he is near or far no matter where I go. I have his love in every piece of my very soul, and in every strand of my whole being. Just like a magician who could just pop out anything he wishes from his magic hat, my dad pops out the best of his love in my every heart beat, and I feel him holding me close in every air that I breath... and I again I realize that I have a beautiful life.

“…..the rivers of his hands… overflowed with good deeds…”

And I feel that as I sail in this ocean of life, no matter how tamed or how enormous the waves could be, I will never lose the strength to sail because I HAVE A DAD WHO NEVER FORCED ME TO TRY HARD TO BE GOOD and COURAGEOUS, BUT I HAVE ALWAYS CHOSEN TO TRY BECAUSE I WANT TO LIVE A LIFE THE WAY HE DOES, I WANT TO HAVE A HEART JUST LIKE HIS. I HAVE A DAD WHO TAUGHT ME NOT ONLY WITH WORDS, BUT MOST OF ALL, WITH PRACTICE AND LOVING DEEDS THAT NO MATER WHAT LIFE HAS TO OFFER, GOD WILL WALK WITH ME AT MY BEST AND WILL NEVER FAIL TO CARRY ME AT MY WORST. I CHOOSE TO BE GOOD NOT BECAUSE I FEAR HIS WRATH, BUT BECAUSE I RESPECT and LOVE HIM MUCH MORE THAN HE WILL EVER KNOW.

"Any man can be a Father but it takes someone special to be a dad." - Anne Geddes

______________________________________________

…This ODE TO MY DAD, TATANG BEN is also dedicated to ALL MEN with children OUT THERE WHO DO NOT ONLY MANAGE to be a “FATHER” but has LOVINGLY BECAME A “DAD”. And of course to MY LOVING HUSBAND, WHO HAS EVERY RIGHT TO BE CALLED “DAD” by OUR SON.

I would also like to share this hub to all the children who are growing up and even the grownups who are with their dad physically at this moment or not, and to the ones who already had to lose their dad because the ONE who gave him to them has taken back his life. NEVER FAIL TO KEEP IN YOUR MIND AND HEART THAT NO ONE AND NOTHING (not even death) CAN EVER TAKE AWAY YOUR DAD FROM YOU. BECAUSE A GOOD DAD HAS ENGRAVED IN YOUR VERY SOUL ALL THE LOVE THAT A TRUE WONDERFUL AND LOVING DAD COULD GIVE.

“A FATHER brings the bacon in the HOUSE out of RESPONSIBILITY, a DAD gives you smiles and laughers while you eat the bacon he brought HOME with SO MUCH LOVE and UNDERSTANDING in his heart…” (DjBryle)

HAPPY FATHER’s DAY EVERYONE! And HAPPY FATHER’s DAY to MY DAD and to MY HUSBAND who both bring out the best in me even at my worst and make me feel beautiful at my ugliest.

Copyright by DjBryle, 2011

... as we take our steps in our own life, our DAD will always be there remembering us as kids. Let us make them feel that as much as they remember our "butterfly kisses" and short stories and all the nursery rhymes we sing at night, we will ALWAYS KEEP IN OUR HEARTS OUR "BUTTERFLY KISSES" THAT WE WILL ALWAYS GIVE THEM NO MATTER HOW GROWN UP WE BECOME...

... I will ALWAYS be my Daddy's little girl...

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Comments 5 comments

VioletSun profile image

VioletSun 5 years ago from Oregon/ Name: Marie

My father died many years ago at age 59 due to alcoholism, so I did not have a father growing up, yet, even in the midst of his dysfunction, I remember him with kindness because he was kind to his children. I stopped to read your hub because I know you always write from the heart and have pearls of wisdom. You wrote a very touching tribute to your Dad and all dads!

Voted up and beautiful, of course. :)


travel_man1971 profile image

travel_man1971 5 years ago from Bicol, Philippines

Great tribute, djBryle!!! My father died in 1998 due to lung cancer. He regretted it but it was to late. Good thing was he taught us, his eight children to be self-efficient with the help of my mother. I still saluted him for being my father.


always exploring profile image

always exploring 5 years ago from Southern Illinois

Such a beautiful tribute to your Father. I'm happy for you. You were truly blessed. Thank you for sharing. I also love the quotes.

Cheers


Treasuresofheaven profile image

Treasuresofheaven 5 years ago from Michigan

Simply beautiful djBryle! I love this. You dad taught wonderful lessons. Thanks for this wonderful share!

-Sima


ktrapp profile image

ktrapp 5 years ago from Illinois

This is magnificient. I love how you focus on what you do have with your father, and to me that seems like a very powerful, loving, strong, caring and giving relationship. And he is such a lucky man to have a daughter that sees all of this in him.

Of course I am voting this up, beautiful and awesome!

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