At what age should kids leave home/the nest as it's called? :)

1. 59

   Dviewsposted 13 years ago

   At what age should kids leave home/the nest as it's called?

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2. 73

   breathe2travelposted 13 years ago

   The answer to your question varies as individuals are different.
   Some parents prepare their children to be responsible and independent at an early age, by teaching them lifeskills and increasing personal responsibilty as they mature.
   Some parents fail to instill lifeskills, and thus, should help support their children until the child acquires the ability to function successfully on his/her own.
   
   Having said that, I personally believe a child should be able to function in society productively by the age of 18, even if they are in college.  If a child is in college, I think it is appropriate for a parent to still support the child.  If a child is not doing anything to improve his/her own life after they graduate high school, I think parents inflict more harm than good if they refrain from placing requirements: getting a job, volunteering, community service, etc.
   
   I have a cousin who earned his college degree on a soccer scholarship.  When he graduated, the job market was tight, to put it mildly.  He moved back in with his parents.  He is now 23, and is saving money to move into his own place.  He said at a recent family gathering, "It's just time.  It's part of growing up and becoming a man.  My family is great and all, I have a wonderful situation.  But, I just need to support myself and be out on my own."  His goal is to have saved enough money to live on his own comfortably for a few months.  He will continue to work while looking for employment in his specialty.
   
   I think anywhere from 18 to 24.

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3. 60

   Michael C Murphyposted 13 years ago

   There is no age, they should leave when they are ready.  Parents should do everything they can to help their kids get ready.  If they're not out by age 30 something is wrong.

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4. 67

   MermaidMoneyposted 13 years ago

   18 years and one second! LOL! 
   
   Just kidding of course!  I am thinking that while my kids are actively pursuing a college degree, I will happily house them in our home if they attend locally.  After they have graduated, I will give them about 6 months to find employment and they start paying for rent and expenses and from that point on, they will have a year to find their own place.
   
   I will push them towards an independent status gently but firmly at the same time.  They both have expressed to me that they don't want to be "30 year old loser living at home" ha ha!  But then again they are only 8 and 10, so we have a ways to go!
   
   I think a happy medium is within 18 months of college graduation.  BA Degree.  If a child wants to have a Masters or PhD, I think they need to fend for themselves, that is a pretty grown up decision and jumping off point. Cut those purse strings at that time!

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5. 59

   Dviewsposted 13 years ago

   Michael C Murphy, breathe2travel, MermaidMoney thank you for all your insightful answers.
   
   Michael I agree with you, if that if they're not out by 30 something is definitely wrong. If someone on the other hand has left home and then needs a temporary stop over 2-3 months sure
   
   breathe2travel I agree with you they should be ready by age 18.
   
   MermaidMoney you are funny LOL, you are kind giving 1 second over. I like your practical approach too, let them foot some bills in training, good stuff
   
   Thank you all.

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