The teenage years are often complex. You are no longer a child but not yet an adult. You are in a no person's zone so to speak. The teenage years are years of exploration and discovering who you are. You are in the process of becoming increasingly independent of your parents and going your own way. As a teenager, did your parents consider you to be no trouble and an easy teenager or were you a rebellious hellraiser who was a constant thorn and quite a trial?
I was an idiot when I think back on all of the stupid things I did as a teenager the only thing that popped into my mind was how truly stupid I acted.
I was one big hot mess as a teenager. I had a dysfunctional family that consisted of a womanizing father, a narcissistic and controlling mother, and a little brother I tried to shield from all of the drama and abuse. I was anorexic, bulimic, a cutter, and suicidal at times. I had to leave to get better and thank God I am now living a great life with a wonderful husband and kids. I would not relive my teenage years for anything. It's hard figure out who you are when you are busy trying to survive your life.
I wrote a Hub about this very topic. I'm still pretty wet behind the ears, as far as HubPages is concerned, but it was one of my first Hubs.
You can read it if you like, but the short answer is that I was a ROYAL pain in the ass.
http://peachpower.hubpages.com/hub/Thin … r-Old-Self
until i was 13 i was a nightmare in my parents eyes. i moved out or ran away then and didn't see my parents for 3 years , so i guess i was then a dream child. lol
"Who WERE YOU Exactly As A Teenager?"
As for what my parents thought, who knows?
As for what I think, a mess.
As a teenager, I was an angel. It wasn't until I turned 21 that I became a devil.
Vainer, less reflective, conservative, and religious.
Now i am just a neurotic mess .
I was desperately trying to be a grown-up and fighting to be treated as one, (a losing battle!). My parents would have described me as trouble and as a rebel, but if they had borrowed any other teenager for a few days they would have realised that I was actually an angel.
I don't even like to think of those confusing years! Between 14 and 18 it was the worst, a mix of big dreams, big laughs, big fears and endless frustration. Feel free to throw more edgy emotions in there, I had them all.
Thank Goodness I was a good kid, and never got in trouble.
I love your question, gmwilliams
In my teen years I was so confused about who I was. Equally my parents weren't the greatest. They aggitated what I feel was a normal rebellious stage and made it more like HELL.
I fought everybody, hard. I smoked weed, drank 40's Old English and Heine's, had sex and then went to church on Sundays (on the weekends that I didn't run away from home.) I thought I was always in control of what I wanted to do. I was the rebel of the family, I mean my entire family. No one bothered me, now I know that no one wanted to be bothered with me. Because no one knew what to do with me. I got my but whooped alot but I still did what I wanted.
Can't go into all the details but I was the "Queen B" wish I could do it all over again.
Parents should be more understanding of their teenagers. Rebellion is a natural phase of life for many teenagers. While a few parents realize that their teens are individuating into adults, others become quite fearful and apprehensive of that, fearing discord in the family modus operandi.
I grew up pretty middle class, in Grand Rapids, Michigan. I was a straight A student all through grade school. Then, my father decided it was time for us to move, and we moved to a town of about 100 people in northern Michigan. There was 5 of us living in a one bedroom house, with no running water, we had to pump our water by hand, and the house was pretty much shit. My dad quit his full time job in GR, to take a job a furniture factory in Big Rapids, only to have that business go under and let everyone go, and we ended up on welfare. The new poor.
The 7th and 8th grade was ok, and, my dad tried to convince us that things would get better, but nothing changed. By 9th grade, I was really starting to hate my life, my dad, and everything about northern Michigan. It was like I had moved from Heaven into hell. I didn't care about anything, home, school, it just all seemed like it didn't matter. The straight A student became the uninterested, lazy kid, who just wanted to get as far away from this place as he could. I ran away a few times, and ended up in foster care for 2 years. But, the 2 years in that foster home, was 10 times better than being at home.
I was not a bad kid, and I loved my mom and dad, I was just very resentful of how people in this so called great nation are so easily treated like shit, when they no longer seem to matter. In foster care, I went to Big Rapids highs chool, which was 1,000 times better than the shit hole I went to. (White Cloud High) My grades went back to being around B and C average, I had new friends, and seemed to care about things again. But, knew that I would eventually have to go back home. I thought I was ready for that day, and I could handle it. But, when I returned things were just worse.
Home life was good, still had to live in the same crap hole, but I was happy to be back with my family. But, going back to WC was like taking a trip from sixth grade back to kindergarden. All the things that I had learned in Big Rapids in the 9th and 10th grade, were only available at Senior level, which meant going back to school there would mean that I would pretty much have to spend 2 years repeating what I already learned. Everyone said, well, then you should get really good grades then. I said, hell no, and decided not to go back to school at all. I dropped out at 10th grade level, and went for a GED, which I received in just 4 weeks of classes. While everyone else trying for their GED was on their 4th year of attempting to get one, some could not read at all. Very sad.
So, getting my GED was a success I guess. But, I felt so let down by the world, and around that time, I also found myself sexually confused. So, now, not only did I resent the world, I learned that it hated me just as much. For a 17 year old, it was pretty hard to deal with. But, I always knew deep down inside, that one day I would be a better person. So, being a teenager, didn't really mean that much to me. If I could go back and change a few things I would, but, only so that I would hope to be better off than I am today. But I would still be the same person.
Very sad story. I am so sorry to hear about this. Hope your life is much better now.
Oh it has been much better. I started working full time, and started a great life of my own for more than 20 years, until I lost my job in 2009 and haven't worked since. But, I have had some great times, made lots of friends, and I am fairly happy with my life. The teen years just sucked. Well, except for 2 years having a special friend. I'll always remember that.
'a rebellious hellraiser who was a constant thorn and quite a trial?' my parents nor me, knew if I was coming or going I had everybody in a whirlwind with a temper to boot. Hard to believe I'm so mellow today compared to those years
I had to figure out that people are not perfect and that took a while because I had looked up to my parents and the leaders at my church and my teachers without question. Then I had to figure out how I fit in with my peers, most of whom were wild. Finally, I discovered that my Father in heaven loved me no matter what, and then my view of people, myself, and the world in a whole new light. Life has been an adventure since and even with its ups and downs, great sorrows and wonderful joys, I am glad for the journey and know how it will end.
Hi gmwilliams-great question for us old ladies!
Wow, what do I remember of the 70's? Not much, haha. Yep, I was into Acid, Hashish, Marijuana and booze-experimenting with every 'consciousness-expanding' experience that happened to be available. Timothy Leary and the Mararishi were all the rage and I learned 'drop out'-not really-and to meditate.
All this I did while 'imprisoned' in an all-girls' boarding school, which wasn't so very imprisoning after all-actually we boarders were an awfully adventurous bunch. We learned how to sneak out past the guards at night-I was a classmate of J.Paul Getty's granddaughter, so when her cousin's ear was cut off and sent to grandpappy, the school had armed guards 'round the clock to protect my friend. It was the time of Patty Hearst, etc., the old days, for sure.
Despite the restrictions of a boarding school in general-housemothers and all-we played havoc in the dorms, stealing hearing aids out of housemother's rooms, taking back confiscated items from them (my mom once sent me a box of saltine crackers which I watched one h.m. eat in front of me!!), and getting high in our 'secret garden-we were terribly cosmic, you see.
Boyfriends were always fun to sneak out to see, esp. for the weekend. I had one friend, Robin Riker-who played the busty doctor in the original "Alligator"-sign me out as my chaperone for the weekend, then drop me off with my guy. She was awesome. It's cool to see her on re-runs. No bragging, but how can I not??
I was actually a 'good' girl before I was sent away to school, but BECAUSE of the boarding experience, became pretty wild-and it was the time, no?
My friend got sent away to boarding school in the 70s and she had a similar experience. She had never been into drugs before going to boarding school, she became basically promiscuous and got in all sorts of trouble. Her parents had sent her away to get away for the "common" people she was hanging out with.
I was good other than smoking pot once in a while and cutting classes. On vacation when I was 17 I tried beer and got drunk for the first time and my friend and I hitchhiked and actually got in a car and we had to sit between two guys (we were trusting ). And we got caught with two other guys on a different day in a car doing some heavy petting But that was rare for me ... I blame my friend's influence...she was crazy
Oh, and I also dropped out in Grade 10 and later got my high school equivalency.
I was screwed up! As a teen I had no idea who I was, what I wanted to be, or what to do with my life.
I was depressed, suicidal, anorexic, and miserable.
I didn't have many friends. My family didn't treat me well.
I was verbally and emotionally abused both at home and at school.
I felt like a total nothing and that the world would be a better place without me.
I tried to kill myself twice, clearly I didn't succeed.
I was intelligent enough to get good grades when I wanted to, but I had no ambition to do so.
I was artistic in drawing, poetry, short stories, and dance.
I acted in some school plays, only bit parts.
My mother saw everything wrong with her life, with her past, and with herself when she looked at me. She made sure to take it out on me physically, mentally, and emotionally. Everything was my fault and everything I did was wrong.
My sister made sure I knew that the worst day of her life was the day I was born and if I never existed her life would be so much better.
My father couldn't stand me. Since my parents divorced when I was very young, he didn't have to deal with me very often. Just two weekends a year. He always pushed me away during those times, wanting nothing to do with me.
So, my childhood & teenager-hood sucked. I hated myself. I hated my life. I had no self worth, no self value, no self esteem.... it was the longest, most difficult period in my existence.
I'm glad it's over & that I never have to go back there again.
I would also like to add here that despite how miserable I was, I never turned to drugs or alcohol. I just tended to sleep during my really depressed phases for about 14 hours a day.
mom kat! girl you are great and awesome, don't let anybody tell you any different ? ok? gbys= god bless your soul . I mean it.
I was very much the exact person I am today, just with 30 years less experience to utilize in my decision-making and much less control over the day-to-day details of my life.
I was an average teen.Did not cause much trouble and just wanted to excel in my studies.I was very friendly though and very social but I did not date a lot .I was always the life of the party and somewhat the ordained leader of the pack when it comes to having fun- i. e going to he beach , hiking in the mountains , movies and talk about boys back then .I had one crush in high school all the way to the senior year but i he was not interested in me.He was cute and somewhat of a nerd,LOL! I keep faling for nerds LOL! I married a very kind nerd and I had a high school crush who was somewhat of a nerd .He is now a neurosurgeon and I heard from our high school reunion that he is single and got divorced with 3 kids.Will be interesting to see if I ever see him again. Ha ha ha !!!
Gmwilliams, I know , life is not fair isn't it? (wink ) :-)) .I met my old buddy in high school after 40 years ( that gives you an indication how old am I,LOL) and it was great seeing my old high school buddy.This guy used to pull pranks with me in high school,like hiding my school bag and books and he is still is even now when we met a few months ago. LOL!
I became a teenager right after my father died from cancer and my mother basically had a mental breakdown. For three months my sisters and I did not know where my mom was. My sister, a year older than me, became pregnant at 14 and I followed her footsteps and became pregnant at 17. Between 13 and 17 I got into trouble for shoplifting and other things. But I soon learned that my mom and my sisters were the best friends I would ever have. They all helped me to turn my life around and go to college to become a teacher, despite the emotionally abusive marriage I was in. My teenage years - although not the best years of my life - made me who I am today.
This brings tears to my eyes. I am glad that you have remade your life. God bless!
wow justateacher,you are a survivor. It is amazing how you were able to beat all the odds against you. Keep it up girl! someone up there is watching over you!God bless.!
Well I was a mess, but I think most people had awkward teenage years.
I chose to wear all black, spiked jewelry, and painted obscure black and purple patterns around my face as eyeliner. Oh, and I also had died my hair black. And painted my nails black.
Yep, I was one of those goth kids.
I was quite a nondescript goody two shoes with an underlying wild and unconventional alter self! I was rebellious in my own way. It was during those years that I embraced feminism. It was at that time that I questioned marriage and decided to not to marry or if so, it would occur after much funfare! I questoined organized religion and every single thing. I am a better person for it today!
For the most part, a very shy prankster with good grades but terrible behavior which got me kicked out of high school. My relations with my parent were very good, and I never rebelled against them, I was a very happy teenager caring only about music, books, cars and girls. Come to think of it, I haven't changed that much !
For some reason, my parents thought I was up to more trouble than I actually was. Therefore I was under strict supervision as a teeny bopper. Looking back, I would probably tell them you are innocent into proven guilty instead of guilty until proven innocent. They could have done much better things with their time than to 'big brother' a good kid.
This is a great thread that should keep growing with stories of people surviving teenage years and coming out okay at the end of it, so that today's teenagers see evidence that their future can be just as good. I'm voting it up and awesome.
I never felt particularly smart but I was invited to join mensa at the age of 12. I remember being told at the time that 50% of gifted children lead wasted lives. As a teenager I was on track to be one of the wasted half. Fortunately I survived my teenage years (more good luck than good management) and somehow managed to fall into a successful career.
When I first became a parent I was determined that my children would never face the trials, tribulations and turmoil of my teenage years. They've had their ups and downs of course, but I am extremely proud of each of them. My natural children and my foster children were all very intelligent and potential candidates for trouble. I tried to keep them challenged and avoid them getting bored. I know the trouble I got in to when I was bored ....
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