I am an adoptee and I discovered my real family (parents and siblings) on the Facebook. They searched for me.
I know my parents get jealous because I knew the reality and they are afraid if I turn my back to them.
There should be a happy medium, where both sets of parents can be an active part of your life. Selfishness on either part will only cause a division.
romari, if the "jealous" parents you're referring to are your adoptive parents, there's at least the chance you're incorrect in thinking they "get jealous" if they don't seem "all happy" at the idea you're in touch with your birth family. I'm a mom of 3 kids, and one is adopted from infancy. I know it's different when kids are adopted older than infancy.
In any case, my concern with my son's meeting his birth family (and I was the one who encouraged him to respond when his birth mother contacted an agency to try to meet him) was that the family who hurt him as an infant would hurt him again (in one way or another, not physically but emotionally; mostly because they obviously weren't the most nurturing people in the world, and I didn't think they'd necessarily know the best way to share whatever had to be shared with him, without causing him to "go through some kind of thing" associated with having to digest whatever they did, said, or shared.
I don't know you or your parents, but I'd hope (for the sake of your relationship with the parents who probably love you more than you can know) that you leave room for the possibility that your parents aren't jealous of your birth family at all. Maybe they're just worried about how that family will impact you and your emotions. Most adoptive parents know their child will meet and talk with the birth parents/family one day. It's just part of the deal. Sometimes the reunion is a happy one that adds great things to the life of the adoptee. Sometimes, even if it starts out seeming great, things go bad; and it is the adoptive parents who will be there, trying to help their child deal with having been hurt by the birth family yet again. Maybe none of this applies in your situation, but it definitely is how things can work sometimes.
My foster parents got dibs where importance is concerned. They show love and affection beyond all measure. The love they show, if all parents were like that, this world would be a better place. Love and appreciation to all foster parents.
As a grown up person, romari, you can establish healthy relationship with all your parents, it's up to you to set up boundaries and make it pleasant and useful experience for all of you. Easy said than done though.
I was adopted as well and met my biological mother years ago. But the one who was there for me (adopted mom) was the one who got my love.
by waterbottle 7 years ago
i feel as if they need another chance, because most of the time it is not their fault for the position that they are in. so tell me how you all think about this topic... and also would You ever become a foster parent?
by Leaderofmany 11 years ago
Are Foster Parents using the payments they receive to benefit the child or they using it to benefit themselves?
by rikabothra 8 years ago
Which is more important family or friends?Except your parents, do you think you can count more on close friends than your family?
by colp 13 years ago
I was always aware from a very early age that I had been adopted at only 7 days old and it was arranged before I was born. This may fly in the face of what everyone says but I always wished I NEVER knew, that I'd never been told... I grew up feeling different from everybody else and my...
by Grace Marguerite Williams 7 years ago
Which birth order is considered to be the MOST jealous, envious? Why? Conversely, which birth orderis considered to be the LEAST jealous, envious? Why?
by Paul Richard Kuehn 11 years ago
Which is more important, commitment to one's spouse or commitment to one's job? Why?If you had to choose between your job and spouse if it meant being separated from your spouse for a long period of time, which would you choose and why?
Copyright © 2024 The Arena Media Brands, LLC and respective content providers on this website. HubPages® is a registered trademark of The Arena Platform, Inc. Other product and company names shown may be trademarks of their respective owners. The Arena Media Brands, LLC and respective content providers to this website may receive compensation for some links to products and services on this website.
Copyright © 2024 Maven Media Brands, LLC and respective owners.
As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, hubpages.com uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.
For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at: https://corp.maven.io/privacy-policy
Show DetailsNecessary | |
---|---|
HubPages Device ID | This is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons. |
Login | This is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service. |
Google Recaptcha | This is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy) |
Akismet | This is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy) |
HubPages Google Analytics | This is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy) |
HubPages Traffic Pixel | This is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized. |
Amazon Web Services | This is a cloud services platform that we used to host our service. (Privacy Policy) |
Cloudflare | This is a cloud CDN service that we use to efficiently deliver files required for our service to operate such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy) |
Google Hosted Libraries | Javascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the googleapis.com or gstatic.com domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy) |
Features | |
---|---|
Google Custom Search | This is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy) |
Google Maps | Some articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy) |
Google Charts | This is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy) |
Google AdSense Host API | This service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy) |
Google YouTube | Some articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy) |
Vimeo | Some articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy) |
Paypal | This is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy) |
Facebook Login | You can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy) |
Maven | This supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy) |
Marketing | |
---|---|
Google AdSense | This is an ad network. (Privacy Policy) |
Google DoubleClick | Google provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy) |
Index Exchange | This is an ad network. (Privacy Policy) |
Sovrn | This is an ad network. (Privacy Policy) |
Facebook Ads | This is an ad network. (Privacy Policy) |
Amazon Unified Ad Marketplace | This is an ad network. (Privacy Policy) |
AppNexus | This is an ad network. (Privacy Policy) |
Openx | This is an ad network. (Privacy Policy) |
Rubicon Project | This is an ad network. (Privacy Policy) |
TripleLift | This is an ad network. (Privacy Policy) |
Say Media | We partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy) |
Remarketing Pixels | We may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites. |
Conversion Tracking Pixels | We may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service. |
Statistics | |
---|---|
Author Google Analytics | This is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy) |
Comscore | ComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy) |
Amazon Tracking Pixel | Some articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy) |
Clicksco | This is a data management platform studying reader behavior (Privacy Policy) |