I know we all wonder or have wondered when are we going to find the one? How long is it going to take and where the hell is he or her? And whats taking them to long to come? Do you believe he or she will ever come and why?
You know the best thing you can do is stop looking! Instead pursue your interests with passion and give love freely! When you become the best "you" you can be and dole out generous portions of love you will attract others that wish to return that love and that share your interests and values!
First she or he should stop searching he or she. Correct yourself and be perfect. Create a good opinion of yourself. No one likes those who are crazy on finding their pair. If we go on looking at other things, that pair will certainly meet one day and everything will be settled.
I used to know a lady who seemed to have the perfect marriage. Whenever anyone else had marital problems, she would praise her husband and say how lucky she was to have found her soul mate. It turned out he was having an affair when they went on their always separate vacations, which I always thought was a very interesting set-up. She may have just been hanging out with her kids and friends, but it turned out he had other ideas. So here was this lady who claimed that her husband was perfect and loved her only, but look what was happening on the side. She decided to stay with him and she may still be deluding herself into believing he is perfect/faithful/ect, but her situation made me think. There are exceptional relationships out there, but how well do we ever know the person we are dating, or let alone how well do we know the person we marry? "Finding Mr. or Mrs. Right" does not gurantee they will always be faithful, or even if they are faithful that things will always be perfect. Relationships take hard work and do not end as with Cinderella.
How to find Mr. or Miss Right? I definitely I am no expert in this field. However, I do have one piece of advice although it might seem strange. My piece of advice is look for a "fair fighter." It's unavoidable, in every relationship, there will be fights. However, the way a couple fights can make or break a relationship. Hence, when you have your first disagreement look for these things.
Do they remain calm during a disagreement?
Do they listen to what you have to say without interrupting?
Do they get defensive?
Do they try to turn the argument around and place the blame on you?
Do they try to sidetrack you and make you lose your focus?
After the disagreement, do they give you the silent treatment? Do they seek revenge later on? Are they able to let go of the argument once its over?
Do they bring up past arguments or unrelated topics?
Are they verbally or physically abusive during an argument?
Have they learned to pick their battles or do they argue about every topic that comes up?
Are they able to compromise?
If they did something wrong which caused the argument, are they able to say I'm sorry?
These are just a few things I can think of off the top of my head. However, from what I've noticed through the course of relationships in my life, the way a person argues reflects alot about their personality. It's only natural to disagree, but if you see any of these warning signs in the beginning, pay attention to them. It can make the difference between a happy or unhappy relationship. One final thought, my grandpa used to say, "Never go to bed angry."
My god, If I looked for a person that doens't have none of those I would still be single!
When there are discussions things tend to get ugly one way or another... tht's why it's called a discussion anyway! As long as prople work it out, that's fine.
It might be good for this person to hold out for those things if they know that is what would make them happy in a relationship. So many people jump into relationships blindly and then argue later on about issues where they do not agree. It is far better to be single and keeping an open mind to possibilities than constantly arguing in a relationship. My list is not exactly theirs, but I prefer being single over being in a relationship where someone is going to upset me constantly.
Thank you for your input, Sweetiepie. In my defense to Profiler, it's not that a person has to meet all that criteria. However, they are red flags to watch for in a relationship. It's a surety that people are going to have disagreements. However, if you're with someone who would rather argue and point the finger at someone else, it's going to be all the harder to reach a mutually acceptable compromise. I don't know about everyone else, but I hate arguing. It's emotionally draining. And even when the argument is over, especially if it was a particularly bitter one, it puts a damper on the day. I would far rather be with someone who is willing to listen and compromise to work problems out.
never find or search cause love is in the air:) you ll never notice that he/she is beside you. just be sensitive enough!
I say it's when you quit looking that that person will come to you. I searched and searched, and when I told God that I was done and He could bring that person when he was ready, was when that person came. And he is so Mr. Right. We've been together for 4 wonderful years now.
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