To enter some houses you use steps, you can use a step stool, or even step in the way of a car? If you remarry and children are involved, they are your children. Not "step children". Anyone can father a child, but it takes a real man to raise a child. Just my opinion, what are your thoughts?
I agree. When you adopt a child they become "your child", because you are the one who brings them up and cares for them. Why should this be any less so when you come into the child's family through marriage?
I loved your comment and I totally agree. After having been a single mum for 4 years, I have met a wonderful man and re-married. Now my 2 sons have a Father. He is so devoted to the boys and treats them as if they were his own in every single way. The boys call him "daddy" (without ever being prompted), because that is exactly what he is.
I think there are times the word is used correctly. I have one father and one mother. I'm not calling anyone else my parents and I have no problem with the fact that I would be labeled a step child. Our children call my father's wife by her first name. She isn't grandma either. This isn't disrespect for her and she is aware of it. It's respect for the woman who bore us.
My husband's son is of the same opinion. I would do anything in the world for him but we don't possess the bond of blood.
Children who need that extra layer of security should be given it, freely. Those who don't should be loved the same, but extended family should be sensitive to their wishes. Step child is just a name.
having been one something of a put down for the child
The 'step' part of it is just a word, what would you change it to? Step suits the situation, its a step in one direction or another, for both the new partner and the child, and is universally understood.
I think it depends on the situation and the age of the children. Many step parents and step kids are fine with the term.If children are older, however, it may seem too weird to call someone else mom or dad. In my situation, my kids started calling my husband "dad" right away. They were young, and they chose to call him that. And he is their dad in every way but biological.I think it bonds a family in a way, and it has been a very good thing for us.
My mother remarried when I was about 12 years old and I NEVER heard the word step child used or step father. I had several new siblings which were my brothers and sister. My dad never introduced me as anything except his daughter and I introduced him as my dad. I simply had two dads so I was pretty lucky! I remarried when my son was 3 months old and he grew up with two dads as well. He was lucky to be loved by both fathers like I was. My husband has always introduced him as his son and our son has always introduced him as his dad. I think it is a healthy way to raise a family when divorce and remarriage are an issue and children are involved. Everyone belongs to everyone and no one feels second to anyone else!
I refuse to use the term step-child in my home. Nobody stepped on anybody! They are my children. Period. The only time I ever refer to them as step-children is when (and I despise this) if I have to fill out a form and it asks for the relationship to the child and has no other option but natural or step. I think it should be changed to say, "child by marriage."
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