Watch Out for Your Closest Family Members
There are family members who are preying on their own families. Many families have these types of people in their family, but failed to recognize it until it is too late. Generally, signs are very inconspicuous, you just think your relative is going through a hard time. (names have been changed to protect the innocent and the guilty)
After graduating from high school, Pamela got married and started family right away. For a while life was good until Pamela found something was missing in her life. The problem was Pamela didn't know who she was. Pamela's marriage ended with her getting custody of her children. Pamela wasn't established enough to live on her own, so she ended up moving in with her mother and siblings.
Pamela did ok at first, but she began to spend more time socializing. Since this behavior continued, Pamela's children went to live with their father for a while. Pamela got married later to a man name Marcus. Marcus was the type of man who says he's done it all, but he has nothing to show for it. For two years, Pamela and Marcus moved from one place to another. They stayed at her mother's house, then they moved to each of her two brothers' home.
Finally Pamela and Marcus moved in with her mother again. Pamela's mother was now living with and caring for Pamela's grandmother on a full time basis. Both Pamela and Marcus were unemployed. Pamela's mother only agreed to allow them to live with her, if they would help around the house and occasionally help with the grandmother. Everyone seem to be in agreement. As months past, Pamela became more distant and cold to her mother. Marcus was kind of cold, but he changed and started being more helpful.
Marcus was acting more like a son, than Pamela was a daughter to her mother. Marcus volunteered to take the grandmother for walks. He would work around the house, and repair things. The only problem, Pamela's mother did have with Marcus is whenever they would go to the store, Marcus would always ask her to buy items for the home and she would never see those items again. Pamela on the other hand, when she was asked to do anything, her response to her mother would be "Can't you do it" or "You ain't doing nothing".
This was an insult to Pamela's mother. Pamela's mother was caring for the grandmother twenty-four hours a day, seven days a week. Pamela's mother never charged them for rent, she even offer them food, when they didn't have any money.
Their relationship had its ups and downs, but no one thought it would escalate to this. One day, Pamela came in her mother's area of the home and took a bottle of lotion. Pamela's mother wasn't disturb by it, but she did feel Pamela should have asked first. When Pamela's mother asked Pamela to ask first. Pamela flew off the handle and it ended very badly.
That following morning, the police came knocking at the door. The police asked to speak with Pamela's mother. The police claimed that the grandmother had been to the police station several times in the past three months, with complaints about Pamela's mother. The police said that the grandmother said she was not happy with how things were being ran in her home. Pamela's mother was very surprised and dumbfounded. When Pamela's mother asked the grandmother about the police being there. The grandmother replied that she wanted to be to herself and she had someone else who would look after her. The police went a step further and show Pamela's mother papers where her name was stripped from the power of attorney, healthcare, and deed of the home. Pamela's mother asked the grandmother did she want her to leave. The grandmother said yes. Pamela's mother asked if Pamela and Marcus were going to leave also. The grandmother said that's Pamela's and Marcus's business. The grandmother told Pamela's mother she had someone from the church coming to look after her.
Pamela's mother made arrangements to stay until she found a place. But it wasn't long after that Pamela and her mother had another argument. The next day, the police came and told Pamela's mother, she had to vacate the premises. This is when Marcus stepped up and notified Pamela's mother that he had the power of attorney and she must leave. Pamela's mother was told by the police that she could come back after twenty-four hours to get the rest of her things. Pamela's mother was only allowed to take what she could carry for right now.
Pamela's mother went to stay with a friend, but one of the neighbors who lived by the grandmother called later on that night and said Marcus was placing her things in the yard inside the fence. Pamela's mother went to see for herself, when she arrived there was her personal belongings in garbage bags and boxes outside in the yard. The police arrived and informed Pamela's mother, they could not get involved because it was a civil matter. Pamela's mother was not in a position to afford a moving van nor had anyone to help move her things. The police were kind enough to make Marcus move everything back into the house.
A couple months past before Pamela's mother was able to get money for a place. When Pamela's mother return to the grandmother's home to check on her belongings, Marcus would not allow her back into the house and he placed her belongings outside in the yard again. Pamela's mother had to contact the services for the elderly and ask for the advocate to check on the grandmother. According to the advocate, the grandmother was of a sound mind, and there was no grounds for accusing Marcus of unduly influencing the grandmother.
Pamela's mother never was allowed to get all of her belongings. Marcus gave her what he felt belong to her. Marcus went as far as convincing the grandmother to file an order of protection against Pamela's mother, which was later dismiss because the grandmother did not show up for the court date. All while the events were transpiring, Pamela's only comment was she did not have anything to do with this, and she was going to look out for herself.
Pamela's mother only question was "How can Pamela and Marcus come and put her out of a place, after she allowed them to come and stay?" "How can her own mother whom she nursed back to good health, treat her this way?" Pamela and her mother have not spoken to each other since the incident. Pamela's mother has relied on her other children for help.
Pamela's brothers said they had already stop communicating with Pamela. They said that Marcus's own family complained about them, and have no contact with him at all.
There a lot families who have relatives that prey on other relatives. It is so easy. They go after the relatives who are the most caring and forgiving.
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