Why First Time Parents in Their Thirties Make Better Parents
First Time Parents in Their Thirties are More Mature and Financially Stable
There ought to be a law mandating that people should not be parents until their thirties. When a person is in their twenties, they are just exploring life issues in terms of their careers and personhood. Very few people, if any, are ready to be parents in their twenties. The twenties are a time to explore further career/educational opportunities and personal/social choices.
Many people who become parents in their twenties report that they are missing life growing opportunities such as attending parties with friends, having more dating opportunities, doing extensive traveling, and broadening their career/educational choices. They remarked that they feel tied down at an early age. They often wished that they waited until their thirties or later to have children. Oftentimes they feel resentment towards friends who have kept their options open. Many times, these people take out their resentment on their spouses and children.
Usually couples who have children in their twenties often enlist the help of their parents to raise their children. For example, two of my aunts had their children in their twenties and they felt frustrated and tied down because they were missing things in their lives. They usually screamed at their children and had my grandmother help raise their children. They were bitter because they could not advance in their jobs because they needed the time to raise their children. Also they could not return to school to further their education and had to settle for low-paying, dead end jobs.
Conversely, first-time parents in their thirties, especially their mid-thirties, have completed their educations and have regulated their careers. Furthermore, they have traveled and have other life experiences. They have lived and now can devote their time to raising their children. They are usually affluent and can give their children more cultural and economic opportunities than parents in their twenties can. Parents in their thirties are more settled and enjoy being with their children more. They often stay at home more with their children than parents in their twenties who usually want to go out every weekend.
When one is in his/her thirties, there is a growing maturity and mellowing of behaviors. Parents in their thirties are more understanding of children's behaviors and use time out and talking to their children as a form of discipline. Parents in their twenties are usually not as emotionally developed in terms of disciplining children. People in their twenties are not equipped to raise to raise children as many sociological studies show. Many sociological studies contend that one's adolescence extend to the twenties. To reiterate, the twenties are a time of exploration regarding relationships, educational, career, and related social opportunities before settling down. People are more educated and sophisticated today and they no longer rush into marriage and parenthood in their twenties. Furthermore, older people because of their age and experience are more equipped to raise children. This is why many people elect not to marry and become parents until they reach their thirties and beyond.
© 2010 Grace Marguerite Williams
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