10 Hot Salsa Choices For People Who Like Things Spicy
I grew up in southwest Arizona where everything is hot. The sun is hot. The people are hot. And the food is hot! After doing some traveling, I've come to realize that not everyone in the country likes their food as spicy as we do down in the Southwest. But I've also learned that there are a select group of people in any city who just can't get their food hot enough. For those people, the best find to compliment almost any dish in the kitchen is a great hot salsa. But where do you go to get that spicy condiment if you're not living in a place like the Southwest where a burning tongue is truly appreciated?
Here is a look at some of the hottest salsa out there for you to consider importing into your own kitchen:
- Ass Kickin' Salsa. This is probably the most well-known super-hot salsa brand out there on the market. You can see these products sold in "general stores" in Southwestern tourist-attraction towns like Tombstone or Old Town San Diego. And you can order the products online. For most people, they are considered gag gifts because this salsa is so hot that it's going to bring tears to the eyes of anyone who puts it on their dish. For the true hot salsa lover, it's the perfect thing to stock the kitchen with! They've got a variety of different flavors including wild ones like peach rum and whiskey peppercorn but probably all you're really going to taste is the fire!
- Pain is Good Salsa. The masochist in all of us likes to try to take the hottest salsa that we can handle because we know that a little bit of pain feels just right. That's the premise behind the salsa line from this specialty foods company and the products certainly deliver on that premise. Their habanero garlic salsa is the hottest to go with but you can choose lighter pain in the form of products like chipotle con queso or Jamaican pineapple salsa. Just make sure that you've established a safe word!
- Screaming Sphincter Habanero Salsa. There is pain and then there is PAIN. This kind of heat on your tongue doesn't just cause your mouth to feel like it's ablaze; it penetrates through your whole body so that you feel that heat in every single pore! If you're afraid of having people see you scream then you should avoid this salsa at all costs.
- Religious Experience Salsa. There is some pain that goes so far that it takes you to the depths of what can be described as a spiritual experience. If you are the kind of person who wants to get there through the sense of taste then the Religious Experience brand of super hot salsa may be the product that can take you over to that other world. You may be wishing that there was some holy water around after consuming this salsa.
- Salsa Stoopid. A few people will avoid purchasing this product because they don't want to buy something that tells them right up front that it's stupid to put it in their mouths. Daredevils, on the other hand, will pour this jalapeno-heated salsa on to their favorite dishes and take the chance that they're going to feel stupid for doing so. As long as you really love salsa hot and spicy, you'll like what you get. Just make sure you've got some water handy in case you realize that this level of heat is just too hot!
- Dave's Insanity Salsa. How about a salsa that doesn't tell you that your stupid to try it but does warn you that you have to be just a little bit crazy to put something this fiery hot into your mouth? Those of us who grew up in 110-degree heat know that your brain has to be a little bit fried to like things this hot! And we love it anyway because we're crazy kids like that.
- Scorned Woman Salsa. Imagine the hellfire coming out of a woman that has been scorned. Now pour that directly into the batch of salsa that you are making and turn the heat up in your kitchen. You're going to find that this brand of salsa is too hot for most men to handle. If you're one of those guys that likes to play with fire even though you might get burned, this is the brand of salsa that is going to knock your socks off with its heat.
- Jump Up and Kick Yo Butt Salsa. Looking to pick a fight with a salsa that isn't afraid to fight back? This line of hot salsas isn't going to back down whether you're picking on the original habanero taste or its' peach mango habanero kid sister.
- Blair's Fresh Fire Roasted Tomato Habanero XXX Hot Salsa. Doesn't the name just say it all when it comes to this super hot salsa. It's so hot that it's not meant for kids under the age of 18! Okay, that's not quite true but you're taking some risks with your tongue when you consume this hot salsa.
- Xerarch's Severe Salsa. This is one of those salsas that tricks you because the first taste that you get of it is kind of sweet and not so spicy. It is only after you have had a few more bites that you suddenly realize that your entire mouth is on fire and that there's not anything that you can do about it. The salsa just laughs.
All of these salsa options are great for the individual who really wants a salsa that's got some bite to it. However, the best option for a hot salsa lover is to learn how to make it yourself. Doing it this way not only guarantees that you're going to get the freshest salsa possible but it also allows you to keep on adding the heat until you can't stand it anymore and finally have to get out of that kitchen!
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