Super Model Recipes, NO DESSERT! supermodel

Yummy!

Pea Mignon

Ingredients: 1 Pea

9 Bacon Bits

To prepare the Pea.....open can...or bag if frozen Pea.....put on plate!

Sprinkle bacon bits on napkin....pick the nine smallest bits (NOT THE BIG ONES FAT ASS!) and evenly surround the Pea. Cook in microwave for approximately 3 seconds.....serve with eye of potato and....or....three drops of Koolaid. ENJOY!

DO YOU WANT TO BE FAT LKIE HER?

Corn Ala Thummy Lettuce Delight!

Ingredients: 1 Corn

1 half piece of lettuce

To prepare the Corn....open can....or frozen bag....or pick with nail file from ear.

To prepare the lettuce......take leaf of lettuce....put thumb on lettuce....tear excess lettuce from around thumb (NO CHEATING YOU COW!)....put Corn in center of lettuce....pre-heat oven at 400 degrees....gently set lettuce with Corn placed on top in center of pan...on 3 drops of olive oil...let bake for 2 minutes....serve with string of bean or smoked smoke.


GET THAT BARBIE BOD!

LE SUFLONE AHH SHISKA BORBIE!

Ingredients: 2 Oyster Crackers

1 Tip of Gherkin (Pickle Dumbass)

1 Dime slice of Gouda cheese

1 3 inch long and 1/4 inch wide strip of turkey bologna

To prepare Oyster crackers....open box.....pick two crackers.....place one cracker on tooth pick....place 1 tip of Gherkin on tooth pick....place one dime size slice (NOT A ROLL OF DIMES YA FAT SOW!) on tooth pick...wrap cheese and Gherkin with bologna strip...place final cracker on tooth pick.

Pre-heat oven to 475 degrees...place one end ot tooth pick in boyfriends steak...cook for 32 seconds....serve with minty dental floss.

ENJOY....YOUR AGENT WILL LOVE YA!

WARNING!  These are full course meals and are not intended for daily consumption!

Comments 37 comments

Mighty Mom profile image

Mighty Mom 7 years ago from Where Left is Right, CA

Very creative! Do you think maybe you should put a warning on here that the menus are NOT intended to be consumed in the same day or even the same week. This kind of pig out needs to be saved for a special occasion only!


Tom Cornett profile image

Tom Cornett 7 years ago from Ohio Author

Thanks MM....I will...LOL!


G-Ma Johnson profile image

G-Ma Johnson 7 years ago from NW in the land of the Free

corn ala thummy lettuce....hummm now that sounds really special...when do we eat? ....and is there any chance of desert???HUMMMM.....Love G-Ma :O) and Hugs


Paper Moon profile image

Paper Moon 7 years ago from In the clouds

Christ, now I'm starving!


Tom Cornett profile image

Tom Cornett 7 years ago from Ohio Author

Hi G-Ma....LOL....the desert is dental floss or a half a Chicklet. :) Big Hugs!


Tom Cornett profile image

Tom Cornett 7 years ago from Ohio Author

Paper Moon...I have a pop tart left! Half a beer too! :)


Princessa profile image

Princessa 7 years ago from France

Yummy recipes and easy to prepare. They are perfect to get in shape for the summer... Cos "I am a Babie girl, in my Barbie world, life's fantastic..." You forgot my favourite luxurious dessert for those days when you feel you deserve a treat: One strawberry with the tip coated in edulcorant ;-)


Anna Marie Bowman profile image

Anna Marie Bowman 7 years ago from Florida

Dessert...hmmm...maybe a tic-tac!! Only one calorie...maybe that's too many...


Hawkesdream profile image

Hawkesdream 7 years ago from Cornwall

All this food and I am starving lol


Miss Behaving profile image

Miss Behaving 7 years ago from Memphis, TN

hmmmm tasty! I would suggest that all these meals be eaten while standing up, as it is well known that food eaten hovering over the sink, or off someone else's plate, is a reduced calorie food!


Triplet Mom profile image

Triplet Mom 7 years ago from West Coast

Oh yes these meals are great and will help me to stay full all week. I love the lightheadedness I feel! LMAO.


RKHenry profile image

RKHenry 7 years ago from Neighborhood museum in Somewhere, USA

I like odd, twisted humor. Thanks Tom! Creative Hub.


G-Ma Johnson profile image

G-Ma Johnson 7 years ago from NW in the land of the Free

....but I am still HUNGRY......:O(


Pete Maida profile image

Pete Maida 7 years ago

I think it's time for dinner.


k@ri profile image

k@ri 7 years ago from Sunny Southern California

I'm with G-Ma, still hungry!


Tom Cornett profile image

Tom Cornett 7 years ago from Ohio Author

Thanks Princessa...Anna Marie...Hawkesdream...Miss Behaving...Triplet Mom...RK Henry.....G-Ma.....Pete...and K@ri! Whew! Now I'm hungry! :)


cindyvine profile image

cindyvine 7 years ago from Cape Town

Wow, I'm full just reading about those huge meals!


Ktoo profile image

Ktoo 7 years ago from Atlanta, Georgia, USA

That was tres amusing.


Tom Cornett profile image

Tom Cornett 7 years ago from Ohio Author

Thanks Cindy and Ktoo! :)


SoulaBee profile image

SoulaBee 7 years ago from United States

Tapered Air pudding for desert. Frieda B. swears by it.


Tom Cornett profile image

Tom Cornett 7 years ago from Ohio Author

LOL! Thanks SoulaBee.....What's the recipe? :)


Miss Behaving profile image

Miss Behaving 7 years ago from Memphis, TN

have you ever tried dust? it is very tasty....


Tom Cornett profile image

Tom Cornett 7 years ago from Ohio Author

Cat walk dust? :) Thanks for commenting Miss Behaving! :)


Cris A profile image

Cris A 7 years ago from Manila, Philippines

you should work for some celebrity - they would lurve you, well, at last your humor :D


JamaGenee profile image

JamaGenee 7 years ago from Central Oklahoma

ROTFLMAO! This explains the little old lady who brought the checkout line to a halt one day when her entire order consisted of one lettuce leaf, one tiny mushroom, and two other produce items I can't remember, but which weighed *nothing*.  Nada.  Zip. The checker couldn't figure out how much to ring up because none of the items would register on the scale.  Musta been an ex-model stocking up. ;}


Tom Cornett profile image

Tom Cornett 7 years ago from Ohio Author

Thanks Cris....I wonder if Twiggy needs a cook? :)

Jama Jenee....Thanks...had to be an ex-model...LOL! :)


deanstar888 7 years ago

HA HA ! Thats gr8...luv it!


cgull8m profile image

cgull8m 7 years ago from North Carolina

Hilarious, these are dieters dream food recipes :)


Tom Cornett profile image

Tom Cornett 7 years ago from Ohio Author

Thanks cgull8m....a dream would be more filling! :)


Tom Cornett profile image

Tom Cornett 7 years ago from Ohio Author

Thanks deanstar888.........grrrrins. :)


sharrie69 profile image

sharrie69 7 years ago from Trinidad (an island in the Caribbean)

Hahha...too funny.. I have another great recipie - windpies and nothing chops! It's the latest in super model cuisine! ;-)


Tom Cornett profile image

Tom Cornett 7 years ago from Ohio Author

sharrie.....those sound sniffy good! :)


Jewels profile image

Jewels 7 years ago from Australia

That was hysterical. Can we have more of those recipes. I'm on a diet and need variety. :)


blondepoet profile image

blondepoet 7 years ago from australia

This is super cool LMAO your imagination is wider than the equator. Yahoooooo


Tom Cornett profile image

Tom Cornett 7 years ago from Ohio Author

Thank you blondepoet....grinning! :)


Lgali profile image

Lgali 7 years ago

very differnt hub thanks


Tom Cornett profile image

Tom Cornett 7 years ago from Ohio Author

Thanks Lgali...oops ...I'm a little late on this one. :)

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