Why?

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   gmwilliamsposted 9 years ago

   
   What makes people who grew up in the worst possible circumstances such as lower socioeconomic status, even poverty; abusive environments; and other daunting setbacks succeed phenomenally while others who were born in the best of all possible circumstances such as socioeconomic affluence and all the opportunities imaginable fail abominably in endeavor after endeavor, job after job etc., often meandering and floundering through life, often blaming others and outside circumstances for their failures?
   
   Here is the link::
   http://richhabits.net/lessons-from-the-affluent/

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      Credence2posted 9 years agoin reply to this

      GMWilliams, you have to acknowledge though that statistically a greater number with the favorable life conditions have a better chance to succeed and do succeed than otherwise. There are always going to be the exceptions, but they are more unlikely, few and far inbetween.

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      wildernessposted 9 years agoin reply to this

      Perhaps those "worst of possible circumstances such as lower socioeconomic status, even poverty..." are good circumstances to learn how to overcome and succeed in whatever is chosen, whether it be wealth, love or other?  It strikes me that to be born with a silver spoon is often a roadmap to failure as extraordinary effort is never required or learned.  Failure is unknown and a complete disaster when it happens (and it happens to all of us).  Even the common work ethic is not learned as it is never needed, with the result that those children never learn the value of labor and self respect.
      
      Plus, of course, those children born with the silver spoon never learn that the best things in life are not monetary in nature...

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         gmwilliamsposted 9 years agoin reply to this

         THANK YOU!   Many people born into impoverished conditions such as Mark Wahlberg saw their poverty as a strong impetus to success.  Mr. Wahlberg indicated that he worked for extras as a young kid.  He used this impetus as a rapper, then an actor and producer, and now a mogul.    Many poor children have the drive not to repeat their familial socioeconomic circumstances and to get out of poverty.   They have THE DRIVE.   
         
         Whereas many affluent children have everything given to them.  They do not have the drive because they were not given the opportunity to develop it.   They felt that things should be smooth and easy so despite the immense opportunities they were given, they never obtained even a modicum level of success.   Many don't use their potential, just meandering through life., wondering why they are not as successful as they would like.

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            gmwilliamsposted 9 years agoin reply to this

            I would like to add that I grew up in a middle class development.   Many of the children who graduated from college did not work until 25, being cushioned by their parents.  Although they worked in crappy jobs, they had the best of worlds because their parents supported them.   One of them even got serially fired from many jobs but no bother because of mom's and dad's support.   
            
            Yes, affluent children aren't in a pressure to find a job like poor children have to.   I, for one, know many middle class adult children who did not have to work until their mid-20s.  They also did not have to work in summers in college like poor children did.  I was one of the lucky ones who never worked summerswhen I was in college; volunteered though.   Many of them did not succeed to their expectations because they were cushioned. 
            
            In contrast, there were poor children I knew who worked from the beginning.   In college, these were the children who majored in business and the practical fields.  One of them informed me that she majored in business because she intended to be rich(her goal was fulfilled). 
            
            The middle class children that I knew, including myself, majored in the soft sciences. Many of them had Mcjobs or clerical jobs and never lived up to their potential; many of them in their 40s/50s STILL live with their parents and after their parents died, have ownershp of the apartment.  They never had to worry about being kicked out after the death of their parents. In fact, it is the middle/upper middle class children who lived at home after adulthood because of the affluent circumstances they grew up in.

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      kenneth averyposted 9 years agoin reply to this

      Drive and determination to succeed and out to prove to themselves that they WILL not take second place for any reason.
      The ones, I think, who are born in near-ideal circumstances, somehow feel a cushion beneath them for when they fail, someone will be there to pick them up.
      I knew a wealthy shipping merchant years ago who came to our hometown to live for a short time, and he had this lovely, spoiled daughter so spoiled in fact that on a whim, she broke a friend of mine's heart and led him to believe she wanted to be his wife, so "daddy," gave her a blank check to finance their new digs and she only bought the best, but halfway through the remodeling, she up and left the poor sap in the middle of the night--no note. No phone call. Vanished.
      I think I have made my point.

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         gmwilliamsposted 9 years agoin reply to this

         You are extremely succinct in your premise.   When one has a socioeconomic cushion, one does not need to push himself/herself that hard but when one is naked without that socioeconomic cushion, it is DO or DIE.....That is probably why so many megawealthy parents refuse to leave their children an inheritance, they feel that by not leaving their children an inheritance, it will SPUR them to work hard and succeed.   
         
         Sting, a multimillionaire, indicted that he WON'T leave his children an inheritance because he(came from humble beginnings) feel that his children will lose motivation and become lazy.  Anderson Cooper indicated that his mother, Gloria Vanderbilt, did not leave him an inheritance and he is GLAD that she didn't.

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            kenneth averyposted 9 years agoin reply to this

            I am grateful for knowing you, gmwilliams. You are certainly a person of high I.Q. But you also have room for a person such as myself.

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            John Holdenposted 9 years agoin reply to this

            This is in complete contradiction to your thread claiming that all poor are profligate and does rather back up my point at the expense of yours.

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   gmwilliamsposted 9 years ago

   There are those from more affluent socioeconomic circumstances and had opportunities but they flounder in life.   Everything was given to them on a silver platter but they just don't succeed the way they want to in life.   Surely, you have seen this.   People from middle, upper middle, and upper income backgrounds who cannot hold a job and did not achieve up to their potential although they had myriads of opportunities.  They have jobs that are beneath their education which they hate.   In contrast, there are people who grew up poor to impoverished yet achieved things beyond what is expected of their particular socioeconomic class.  In other words, they achieved and became successful beyond their wildest dreams and imaginations.   These people used their impoverished backgrounds as an impetus to succeed and achieve.

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      Credence2posted 9 years agoin reply to this

      I hear you, but these people that succeed with so much going against them are exceptional people, not your run of the mill Joe. Money and social standing provide a cover for most of the lazy and unproductive  that they otherwise would not have. I hear what you are saying, it is just for every 1 that succeed under adverse circumstance there are 99 that do not. The opposite can be said to be true to those blessed with the advantages going into the game. You have to work hard as Donald Trump's kid to find yourself destitute, even though he may be as dumb as a stump.

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         gmwilliamsposted 9 years agoin reply to this

         More poor kids(lower-middle, lower income, and impoverished) succeed than what is common.   Many poor kids get out of poverty but it isn't broadcasted because they aren't in celebrated or noted status.  You would be surprised as to the poor kids who become socioeconomically successful. 
         
         I was talking a younger woman who is a highly placed executive and she informed that she was born in the projects, went to public school throughout high school and had a scholarship to a prestigious college.   One of my former bosses, a very highly placed professional, was born on the Lower East Side( a poor New York City neighborhood).  There are people that I went to high school with from poor neighborhoods such as the South Bronx, Hell's Kitchen, Alphabet City, and other poor neighborhoods who went on to great socioeconomic success.   Yes, there are poor kids who become successful but that is seldom mentioned as only the poor kids who aren't successful are routinely mentioned but seldom the ones who overcome the socioeconomic odds.

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   mdscogginsposted 9 years ago

   Great question gmwilliams.  I think it comes down to parenting and providing our children with the best "on the job training" as possible.  I just had that discussion with my children.  If I do not teach them as a parent what is ahead of them in adulthood then I am failing them terribly.  So unfortunately for them childhood is just a quick and dirty OJT that will prepare them for the rest of their lives.  If I don't teach them about adversities, consequences and how to be dependable then I am steering them wrong.  We can not only teach our children about the roses and flowers of success.  Success follows hard work, much of which was not enjoyable.  None of what I described takes money or power just the knowledge to pass on what you have acquired and providing them a supportive household where they can make mistakes.  That way the mistakes of the world do not crush their poor little egos.  Happy Parenting

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      gmwilliamsposted 9 years agoin reply to this

      Many affluent parents shelter their children from any type of onerous responsibilities, believing that this will impair their children.  They believe that childhood should be as stress free as possible.   Many middle-middle, upper-middle, and upper class children do not know about the more difficult aspects of life until they become adults.   Oftentimes, they are quite shocked when things are difficult and some become quite daunted by such difficulty because they never had to experience such difficulties as their parents handled them everything on a silver spoon with much effort on their part.
      
      Also many middle-middle, upper-middle, and upper class children have parents with connections.  One person that I know had parents to get jobs; only to be fired from each and every one of them.  This person never had to get anything by effort.  In fact, this person still does not have a substantive profession; never living to his/her potential.   Many impoverished, lower, and lower middle class children had to work from childhood.  They know the meaning of difficulty and hard work.  They know what it is like to make their own way in life.  From this experience, they aren't daunted by difficulty.  In fact, difficulty makes them much, much stronger and determined.   Oftentimes, these children are the ones who become inordinately successful because they have the DESIRE, MOTIVATION, and CAN DO attitude.  Many times, they OUTSUCCEED their more affluent counterpart and the latter wonders how the poor kid is rich and successful and they are only meandering or living off their parents.

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