I'd like feedback on my Hub: The amazing facts of Brown Paper Bags

1. 60

   picobagsposted 7 years ago

   Hi Hubbers,
   
   I'd like some help with passing the Quality Assessment Process. Will you please give feedback on my Hub The amazing facts of Brown Paper Bags (must be signed in to view). What can I do to improve? Thanks!

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   1. 91

      chasmacposted 7 years agoin reply to this

      To get this Hub featured, you would have to remove all references to Pico Bags including the Youtube video and the company logo on the pic. The content itself is fine as it highlights the environmental advantages of paper bags over plastic, but the fact that your name (Picobags) is the same as the company that your video and pic promote will ensure your Hub is seen by HP as thinly-veiled spam.

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   2. 97

      theraggededgeposted 7 years agoin reply to this

      Hi there,
      
      You need more photos - preferably your own. Shouldn't be difficult. Showing all the uses you mentioned.
      
      Where are the 'amazing facts'? There are none in your article. Surely there is more to them than 'gifting and shopping'?
      
      Do some research on plastic bags. They don't take thousands of years to biodegrade. It's somewhere between 10 and 100 years. However, it's possible that the plastic granules they are made of never decompose. By the way, it took me 30 seconds to go and look those facts up. I'm sure you can do better.
      
      Are you 100% sure that paper bags are eco-friendly? Some are coated with chemicals.
      
      Here are some 'amazing facts': http://www.allaboutbags.ca/papervplastic.html
      
      Hope that helps.

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   3. 78

      NatashaLposted 7 years agoin reply to this

      Your last line seems like nothing more than an advertisement for Pico Bags.
      
      This Hub would be enhanced by a brief history of paper bags.
      
      Throughout this Hub, you make general statements but don't expand on them.  Here are some examples of what I mean:
      
      "Previously, brown paper bags were considered extremely fragile and everyone avoided loading them with heavy items."
      ~~Instead of just telling us that brown paper bags were "once considered extremely fragile," tell us when they were considered fragile.  Why were they considered fragile?  What improvements have been made to make brown paper bags more durable?  Even better, post pictures of bags that were once considered fragile and compare them with today's bags.
      
      "Paper bags are more durable, impressive and have become more useful and functional than before."
      ~~According to whom?  What makes brown bags more impressive than before?  How have brown bags "become more useful and functional than before"?  (Never mind that I probably wouldn't call a brown paper bag impressive...)
      
      This Hub is in the wrong category.  Brown paper bags are not shoulder bags.  Shoulder bags are like purses. 
      
      Cite your source for the statement that "Plastic bags do not decay and take thousands of years to degrade. Paper bags are 100% eco-friendly and biodegradable. Once discarded in the open, they mix with the soil easily. When burnt, plastic release harmful toxic gases unlike paper bags. There are many companies who recycle paper bags to produce more paper every day. Thus, paper bags are all purpose environment friendly utility bags."   Granted, this may be general knowledge for many, but citing a reputable environmental source would lend credibility to these statements.  You could also link to scientific articles that support these and other statements.  Name some of these well-known companies who have switched to paper bags or are recycling paper bags.
      
      I don't see what's amazing about using paper bags at stores or for gifts.  Use superlative words like "amazing" only when something truly IS amazing.  It would be amazing, for example, if someone made a life-sized origami elephant out of paper bags. 
      
      Your grammar and usage throughout this Hub need work.  I suggest installing the Grammarly extension on your browser, and visiting UsingEnglish(dot)com to read the lessons, ask questions, and converse with other English language learners.  For you, word choice and punctuation seem to be the most noticeable issues.  I suspect that your English is the reason this Hub didn't pass QAP.
      
      You may be able to find some videos on YouTube that explain the environmental benefits of brown paper bags.  If you can find a good one, add it.
      
      Breaking up this long text with some images or subtitles would make this Hub more readable.
      
      I think this Hub could pass QAP if given enough TLC.

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2. 95

   Rupert Taylorposted 7 years ago

   There are some punctuation issues particularly with the use of hyphens. When a compound adjective is used before a noun it should be hyphenated so
   
   "all-purpose, environment-friendly utility bags." and "The modern-day brown paper ..."
   
   When a compound adjective follows a noun a hyphen is not necessary, so "paper bags have become sturdy and long lasting ..."
   
   Your headline should use headline face consistently, so "The amazing facts of Brown Paper Bags" should be "The Amazing Facts of Brown Paper Bags."
   
   Also, there's a per peeve of mine - Since is not a synonym for Because. However, this grammar rule is so frequently broken that it's almost accepted.
   
   Apologies if this sounds a bit nit-picky.

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3. 88

   Chatty Chatposted 7 years ago

   A lot of this is common knowledge. You need new (and perhaps bizarre) facts about paper bags.  Do more research next time.

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