I'd like feedback on my Hub: What Is the Family System and How to Strengthen It.

1. 0

   threekeysposted 7 years ago

   Hi Hubbers,
   
   I'd like some help with passing the Quality Assessment Process. Will you please give feedback on my Hub What Is the Family System and How to Strengthen It.. What can I do to improve? Thanks!

   replyreport
   1. 96

      theraggededgeposted 7 years agoin reply to this

      Do you think your title is going to be searched for? How about using the keywords 'family structure'?
      
      https://hubpageshelp.com/content/Learni … ndly-Title
      
      Don't mention 'hub' in the hub. Readers are reading an article. They'll be puzzled by the word 'hub' because it is not one generally used to describe a piece of writing.
      
      "Multigenerational transmission process. That is, transmission of diminutive differences of differentiate..." Uh? No idea what that means. Assume your readers have a comprehension level of high school graduates.
      
      It looks like you are promoting Dr Murray-Bowen and his software. Don't be overly promotional. The link gen-pro leads to a energy company's site. It doesn't work from the hub in any case. I had to copy and paste it.
      
      The quote that begins, "Big house..." is not relevant to the content. It's an observation of society in general and not specific to families.
      
      The image of 'interconnecting links' is meaningless. Don't use it just because you can. Make sure the image directly relates to the content.
      
      The link to 'strongbonds' doesn't work. You can add references without links. Sometimes reference links will cause a hub to fail the QAP. I might have explained this to you before. If people want to explore your sources they can Google them by name.
      
      Hope that helps.

      replyreport
      1. 0

         threekeysposted 7 years agoin reply to this

         I appreciate your instructive tips! I will now make the changes. Thanks very much theraggededge:)

         replyreport
   2. 72

      manatita44posted 7 years agoin reply to this

      I'm tired, my Sweet, or I would offer to help. The Hub can be presented better. There are mistakes as well and I would also make the quotes neater. Use 'Family Unit/Structure in your title. Generally, you can progress slowly into the article rather than hitting it head on. Give it 'flow.' Add more text capsules. Much Peace.
      
      If I feel better on Saturday and have the time, then I will help you. Much Love.

      replyreport
      1. 0

         threekeysposted 7 years agoin reply to this

         Rest manitita. I have taken up the feedback kindly given so far and have made alterations. I have done what I can do-for me. I do have a long way to go at improving my writing/communication ability. I hope time will correct and flourish my skills.

         replyreport
         1. 72

            manatita44posted 7 years agoin reply to this

            Read some good books; practice, practice ... practice...

            replyreport
2. 85

   Marisa Wrightposted 7 years ago

   You  have identified your three photos as public domain - are you absolutely sure about that?  They do not look like typical Public Domain photos.
   
   If you got them from a free photo site like Pixabay, then they're actually under a Creative Commons licence, not public domain.   You don't need to put anything in the source box at all, but you can support the photo site by mentioning their name if you wish (e.g. in a credit at the end of the Hub).

   replyreport
   1. 0

      threekeysposted 7 years agoin reply to this

      Hi Marisa
      Yes the photos were from Pixabay. Thank you for the tip. I will in future put Pixabay.
      
      What did you think of the content? How could I improve to have it published by Hubpages, Marisa? Any pointers would be gratefully appreciated.

      replyreport
3. 85

   Marisa Wrightposted 7 years ago

   I wanted to think about this one.
   
   Raggededge has made some excellent suggestions.  Note what she says about the use of the word "Hub":  if you're successful on HubPages, 90% of your readers will not be members of the site.  So write for the general public, not other members.
   
   I'm not sure about the opening picture.  A picture to open a Hub is a great idea, IF it tells your reader what the Hub is about.  However, you seem to be saying that a family doesn't have to be the conventional Mom, Dad and the two kids, so perhaps the picture is misleading?   If you are trying to reach out to people with unconventional families, then that picture would make them click back.  Just a thought.
   
   There are quite a few grammatical mistakes.  For instance, a flower can flourish (meaning grow well) but if you talk about flourishing something, that means "displaying it", not making it grow well.   "Having healthy relationships with others support a strong foundation when differences or upsets arise." - either it supports or it provides a strong foundation, not both.   And it's the having, not the relationships, that supports so it's supports not support. etc.
   
   I think you need to consider how you're trying to help the reader, and make it clear at the beginning of the Hub what you're offering. Otherwise people looking for help will get tired of the generalisations and click back to the search results. 
   
   You have two links.  The first one doesn't work at all - and if I follow it manually, it leads to some totally irrelevant website.   I would find a website which talks about his theories and link the doctor's name to that.   Your second link at the bottom is broken.

   replyreport
   1. 0

      threekeysposted 7 years agoin reply to this

      Yes that picture was chosen to show im open to all family forms. I am planning to write a few hubs on different aspects of relationships/emotional units. Whether that be a typical family/emotional unit....sibling emotional unit...step/adopted emotional family unit...gay emotional family unit...etc. See how I go....
      
      I probably should have left the hub content material settle for a longer period so that I could pick up on my grammatical errors before submitting it to hubpages. But it's true there's nothing like a second pair of eyes!
      
      I will now go and follow up on your feedback. Cheers Marissa!

      replyreport