21 Ways To Justify A World of Warcraft Addiction

Also,Warcraft occasionally makes people dress like this...

Warcraft addiction is a real concern for some people who find themselves immersed in the world of Azeroth to the point that they are unable to function unless they have had their daily dose of Warcrack. Of course, as many players would argue, playing Warcraft is infinitely preferable to a drug fuelled rage ending in the invasion of a foreign country and decades of cruel oppression, which is the only logical conclusion to events should a dedicated player decide to quit the game.

It is said that some people have stopped playing WoW and gone on to lead normal lives, but these people are undoubtedly mythical, like unicorns, or government subsidized health care.

Those who have yet to kill 10 wolves, maim 20 bears and pick 15 flowers over and over for months on end may not understand the lure of Warcraft, but they may nevertheless be placated by the following justifications:

  • By playing Warcraft I can fulfil my urge to stockpile weapons without turning the house into a bunker.

  • I'm doing a study on Orcs in their natural environment.

  • I might be human on the outside, but on the inside I was born night elf. Playing Warcraft allows me to be who I really am.

  • At the current rate of pollution of your so called 'real world' soon Azeroth will be the only inhabitable part of Earth.

  • Playing Warcraft all day prevents me from breeding, thereby saving the planet lord knows how many surplus humans. Even with a trap breaking racial bonus, its just not worth procreating these days.

  • I tried quitting Warcraft, but ganking IRL is apparently a crime in several countries.

  • In Warcraft, I can turn into a bird and fly away from danger. In real life I must claw my way through a hysterical crowd like everyone else.

  • Training and equipping an Epic Mount in WoW costs 5200 gold. In your world, 5200 gold will barely get you off the lot in a Lada.

  • I believe in Warcraft. Like God. Respect my beliefs.

  • Jobs and friends are so mainstream. I prefer to inhabit the edge of reality, socializing with people I will come to know largely for their ability to take and deal damage.

  • In WoW, I can fight a war on terror and actually win.

  • In WoW I die, then I resurrect in the graveyard or run back to my body and resurect there. Nobody screams, calls me a zombie or tries to put a stake through my heart.

  • In WoW, allegiances are clearly defined. Red or Green. Not like the real world where the reds and greens mate and then kill each other anyway.

  • The world economy never crashes in WoW.

  • Pixels are people too.

  • My guild needs me.

  • In WoW, a stranger will ride up to me on a mechanical bird and ask me where to harness a mammoth. In real life, people simply ask for directions to the nearest supermarket.

  • In Warcraft, there's no heaven. John Lennon's dream has come true.

Still not convincing anyone? Here are two entirely compelling reasons guaranteed to win over even the most skeptical among us:

  • Shinies!

  • You no take candle!

And finally: The Murloc Dance

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Comments 4 comments

Simon 7 years ago

Wow, (pun intended) I have to join in.

- In WoW, I know exactly how skilled I am at something. In the real world I can't say I'm an artisan programmer with skill 291.

- In Wow, I can actually catch fish.

- In WoW, there's no dishes to do after cooking.

- In WoW, it's normal for men to wear dresses. (Robes)

I bet I could get another 21 if I tried hard enough.


Hope Alexander profile image

Hope Alexander 7 years ago Author

Please do jon in! The more the merrier! ;)


Najee 7 years ago

hahaha awesome I played WoW too, 70 Hunter, 80 Death Knight Dethsought, 80 Mage Eejan, 70 Warrior Sonta, used to be a addict but then i got help from the local clinic :P


Hope Alexander profile image

Hope Alexander 7 years ago Author

Yeah I have quit Warcraft, any game that requires 20 + hours a week to be considered evern mildly proficient isn't a game - it's a job.

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