Sumotori Drunk Robot Sumo Wrestling PC Game

If the title of this piece does not already have you salivating, then you're a lost cause. A lost cause, I tell you! Sumotori is a simple 96k robot wrestling game for the whole family to enjoy, especially that one relative of yours who is always drunk, they will love this game, I promise you that. In fact, whilst they're playing, you could take the opportunity to wall them into the room and deny them any more liquor. In that respect, Sumotori acts not only as a game, but also as an intervention / impromptu imprisonment facilitation device.

The charm of Sumotori is that, unlike other games, which reward people who practice hard and develop real skills, Sumotori rewards idiotic button mashing. In Sumotori, two drunk robots will face off against one another for a total of about three seconds after which one or the other will inevitably tumble brokenly out of the sumo field then roll around, dismembering itself and breaking everything within striking distance.

This is a game that takes ragdoll physics and shows it who's boss.

Perhaps one of the best elements of Sumotori is the fact that it is utterly and totally free to download. Also, unlike other utterly totally free games that hack your computer and send your account details to Chinese hackers (Evony online, I'm looking at you,) it's only 324 kb. That's right 324 kb. When was the last time you saw a game that could actually be run and played on one of those stupid Palm Pilot devices that were all the rage back in 2004?

Sumotori is sure to find favor among college students, children, middle aged people worrying about the fact that their mortgage is worth more than their house and any other human who sometimes wishes that the world was a simpler, less co-ordinated place.

Let me give you a quick run down, traditional game review style.


Gameplay 10/10
Graphics 10/10
Sound 10/10
Literacy 10/10
Political Correctness 10/10
Inebriation 10/10
Originality 10/10
Price 10/10

That's a massive 80/80, that's right! No other game has been rated this highly ever and that's because Sumotori breaks all the rules of modern gaming and leaves them crying in a corner.

You can download Sumotori for free here. But first, why not watch this video that demonstrates some of the more exciting encounters you'll experience whilst playing Sumotori! Oh the laughter and the joy! Christmas truly has come early this year for the gaming community.

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Comments 5 comments

brian 4 years ago

i wanna play this game

ashley 4 years ago

love this game

kieran 3 years ago


Edward 3 years ago

I am a drunk man so...

I WANT TO PLAY THIS GAME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

blake 2 years ago

you can get it on apple devices

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