The Funniest, Most Hilarious Trivia Game Ever Written: Questions and Answers

Try searching Google for "funny trivia". And I'm not talking about trivia that's fun because most good trivia is fun. I'm talking about laugh-inducing trivia. Stuff that's really funny. I was looking for trivia that was well written as well as funny. There's just not that much of it out there.

This game is intended to cause laughter. Hopefully it's like a comedic version of a trivia game. That being said, the game is still a good trivia game. It's got all the requisite things a trivia game needs to work.

I just wanted my players to laugh through the entire thing. While not every question is funny, the overall intent is there. The game is intended to be played between two teams. The tossups are read until one team answers. The team that answers then receives a bonus question only that team can answer. The game is suitable for bar trivia, similar to the format of Geeks Who Drink. Watch the video for an example of how the game is played.

Enjoy!

Tossup Questions

  1. Who is the only member of ZZ Top who doesn’t have a beard?
  2. Who were the first television couple to be shown in bed together on prime time television?
  3. Who was the first Twitter user to reach 20 million followers? Her songs include The Edge of Glory, Judas, Born This Way, Bad Romance, and Poker Face?
  4. Trivia team name trivia. Here’s the team name: “Was anyone surprised about Jodi Foster. She starred in a movie called The Beaver.” Who was the lead actor in The Beaver?
  5. Millicent Roberts is the middle and last name of what iconic children’s toy?
  6. “All that money, and he’s still got hair like a fu***** dinner lady” is something said about Elton John by what former singer and author of the 1995 autobiography TAKE IT LIKE A MAN.
  7. According to David Letterman, Sarah Palin experienced an awkward moment at a Yankees game when her 14-year-old daughter, Willow, was knocked up by what player?
  8. Both of these things come in a posh box: a Rolex and what British soccer star?
  9. What former American Basketball Association player, when told that his planes departure time was 8 a.m. but would land in St. Louis at 7:59am due to a time zone change said “I ain’t goin’ on no time machine” and rented a car instead?
  10. Based on a red carpet interview, of what Oscar-winning actor did Joan Rivers comment: “he makes Hitler look warm and funny”? The actor’s movies include Love Story, Eyes of Laura Mars, JFK, The Client, and The Fugitive.
  11. More trivia team name triva. Here’s the team name: Stuffing Torrey’s Holes Like Tiger. In what state is Torrey Pines located?
  12. “His mother should have thrown him away and kept the stork” is a quote from this famous actress, who had a notorious feud with Raquel Welch.
  13. “He has Van Gogh’s ear for music” was a quote from this director, whose films include “Buddy Buddy”, “Fedora”, “The Front Page”, “The Fortune Cookie”, and “Irma la Douce”.
  14. “They can’t play baseball. They don’t wear sweaters. They’re not good dancers. They don’t play drums. They are never seen drinking cappuccino in Italian restaurants with oriental women.” Who are they?
  15. More trivia team name trivia. Here’ the team name: “Lance Armstrong finally had the ball to come clean.” Armstrong was the second man to “win” the Tour five times in a row, so who was the only man to win the Tour five times in a row?
  16. “Germans are flummoxed by humor, the Swiss have no concept of fun, the Spanish think there is nothing at all ridiculous about eating dinner at midnight, and the Italians should never, ever have been let in on the invention of the motor car” is a quote by what writer, author of “A Short History of Nearly Everything” and “A Walk in the Woods”.
  17. What singer/actor gave Marilyn Monroe a white poodle named Mafia?
  18. Who wrote Barry Manilow’s chart-topping hit “I Write the Songs?”
  19. “The Sad But True Story of Ray Mingus, The Lumberjack of Bulk Rock City, And His Never Slacking Stribe in Exploiting The So Far Undiscovered Areas of the Intention to Bodily Intercourse From the Opposite Species of his Kind During Intake of all the Mental Condition That Could Be Derived From Fermantation” is the longest song title ever at 305 characters by what group?
  20. “I cut down trees. I eat my lunch. I go to the lavatory. On Wednesdays I go shopping and buttered scones for tea.” Who am I?
  21. He had a reaction to the aluminum powder in his make-up and had to abandon his acting role to go to the hospital. Name this actor, the original Tin Man in The Wizard of Oz.
  22. 1997’s “Perdita Durango”, directed by Alex de la Iglesia and starring Rosie Perez as the titular anti-heroine is the only sequel to any of David Lynch’s movie. Name it.
  23. Hoyt Axton, who plays inventor Rand Peltzer in “Gremlins” was a renowned singer/songwriter. His most famous song, “The Pusher” was covered by Steppenwolf and used in the soundtrack to what iconic Peter Fonda film?
  24. “A Bug’s Life,” “Battle Beyond the Stars,” and “The Magnificent Seven” all owe a debt of gratitude to what Akira Kurosawa film?
  25. More trivia team name trivia. Here’s the team name: “Bruce Willis is a ghost and Batman dies at the end also Gwyneth Paltrow’s head is in the box.” Name the three films.
  26. Nora Ephron was married to Nicholas Pileggi and used Henry Hill’s experiences in witness protection from Goodfellas for which of her films, starring Steve Martin?
  27. What Alfred Hitchcock film features a flushing toilet for the first time?
  28. The rock band Seven Mary Three formed in 1992 when Jason Ross and Jason Pollock met while attending The College of William and Mary. The band took its name from the radio call sign that the character Jon Baker used in what show?
  29. Identify the artist or song from the misheard lyric: “Got my first real sex dream. I was five at the time. Played it till my fingers bled. It was the summer of 69.”
  30. “I didn’t attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it” is a quote from what American humorist and author.
  31. “Music journalists like Elvis Costello because music journalists look like Elvis Costello.” Was a quote from this musician whose solo albums include Skyscraper, A Little Ain’t Enough, and Diamond Dave. He was also the lead singer of a band, but was replaced by Sammy Hagar.
  32. “My pony plays the mamba” is the misheard lyric from this song. The real lyric is “Marconi plays the mamba.” Name the song or group.
  33. He was allergic to carrots. He was a famous voice artist. He voiced a famous cartoon character. The cartoon character was a rabbit. Who was he?
  34. Billie Holiday was the babysitter for what future Oscar host?

Bonus Question #3

Name these celebrities from their high school yearbook photos
Name these celebrities from their high school yearbook photos

Bonus Questions

Famous people often have cause to insult other famous people for one reason or another. I’ll provide a famous person and a quote, you tell me who they were referring to.

  1. Who was Winston Churchill referencing when he said: “My dear, you are ugly, but tomorrow I shall be sober, and you will still be ugly.”
  2. Who was Frank Sinatra referring to when he said: “Well, at least he has found his true love – what a pity he can’t marry himself.”
  3. Who was Bette Midler talking about when she said: “She loves nature, in spite of what it did to her.”
  4. Who was Liam Gallagher talking about when he said: “She can’t even chew gum and walk in a straight line, let alone write a book.”

Identify the following celebrities from their high school yearbook pictures.

See picture above.

Identify the artist and song from the misheard lyrics:

  1. “Might as well face it, you’re a dick with a glove.”
  2. “Steak and a Knife, Steak and a Knife.”
  3. “Let’s pee in the corner, let’s pee in the spotlight.”
  4. “You look like Medusa with Hair-Rollers in the night.”

Athletic injuries are no laughing matter, unless you’re one of these guys. Identify the sports star from the injury that sent him to the bench:

  1. This former cub missed three weeks with a back injury after he sneezed violently.
  2. This former Atlanta Braves pitcher ironed his shirt… while he was wearing it.
  3. This former Blue Jay, Indian, Cub, Giant, Mariner, Yankee, and Angel had a dream he was being chased by a giant spider, jumped out of bed, and sliced open his foot on a glass table.
  4. This Rockie broke his collarbone carrying deer meat up to his apartment.

I’ll give you the title of a porn film, you tell me the director of the real movie upon which it is based.

  1. Dyke Hard
  2. Sorest Rump
  3. Saturday Night Beaver
  4. Free My Willy

I’ll give you a singer or band who had a top 40 hit at the same time another singer or band had a top 40 hit with that singer or band’s name in it. You identify the other act.

  1. While the Beatles had 7 top 40 hits going, who had a top 40 hit with We Love You Beatles?
  2. While Bruce Springsteen had a hit with “Born to Run” who had a hit with “Bruce”?
  3. While Nirvana had a hit with “Come as You Are” who had a hit with “Smells Like Nirvana”?

Identify the actors in the following celebrity feuds given the description of their feud:

  1. This actress supposedly threw a coffee cup of urine in this director’s face when he wouldn’t let her take a bathroom break during a scene in his 1974 masterpiece.
  2. This actor was saddled with a supposed gerbil rumor by his co-star, who also got him replaced in The Lords of Flatbush.
  3. This feud goes all the way back to 1935 when this actress married the other actresses co-star in Dangerous, Franchot Tone.
  4. These television co-stars have gone out it long after their show was cancelled with one actor calling the other “the biggest douche” and the other one complaining he was the only cast member not invited to the other’s wedding and that nobody cared that said actor had come out of the closet.

Identify the song and artist from the misheard lyric:

  1. “Because the night belongs to lawyers. Because the night belongs to lawyers.”
  2. “I love the feel of Lorainne on my face. I love the taste of Lorainne on my lips.”
  3. “I’ll never leave your pizza burnin’.”
  4. “You had to be a big shot ninja.”

One of Jimmy Kimmel’s funniest segments is Celebrities reading mean tweets. Identify the celebrity based on the tweet:

  1. “I’d would rather chop my arm off and fuck myself with my detached limb than watch “This singer: the movie”. What the fuck is wrong with the world?
  2. “Dear God, give us back 2Pack and we’ll give you this singer.”
  3. “If you change the “I” in this actress’s last name to a “t”, you get Anna Farts. Interesting.”
  4. “This actress is so fucking ugly. Way too ugly to play snow white in snow white and the huntsman.”

Athletic injuries are no laughing matter, unless you’re one of these guys. Identify the ports star from the injury that sent him to the bench:

  1. This former Brooklyn Dodgers pitcher with the same name as a former 49ers running back cut his hand while adjusting the strap of his wife’s bra.
  2. This former Broncos quarterback injured his foot while getting off the couch.
  3. Now a city mayor, this former basketball player dislocated his shoulder giving his teammate a hug.
  4. This former Baltimore Colt left guard, who was a key protector of QB Bert Jones, pulled his hamstring running onto the field for the coin toss.

When celebrities attack other celebrities, we all benefit. Identify the person being spoken about given a celebrity and their insult.

  1. “He said now’s the time to get back to work. I thought, yeah you have to get back to work to buy crack. Crack doesn’t buy itself.” Spoken by Gilbert Gottfried about what politician?
  2. “She said that small towns, that’s the part of the country she really likes going to because that’s the pro-America part of the country. You know, I just want to say to her, just very quickly: fuck you.” Jon Stewart’s insult about whom?
  3. Who did Don Rickles say this to: “Oh my God, look at you. Anyone else hurt in the accident?”
  4. Of what actor did Mamie Van Doren say: “He’s the type of man who will end up dying in his own arms.”

Identify these athletes based on an injury they sustained.

  1. This hall-of-famer was off to a white-hot start in 1986, hitting .404 as late as June 6. But that’s when he tried to kick off his cowboy boots in a Toronto hotel room, lost his balance, and fell ribs first onto the arm of a couch. He ended the year at .357.
  2. This former Padre, Ranger, Philly, Oriole, and Rockie, was so excited to open his double DVD copy of Backdraft and Happy Gilmore that he stabbed himself in the stomach trying to get the shrink wrap off.
  3. This rotund Knicks center was just taking a break from practice when he sat on a blue physioball and it exploded. He scraped his wrist and missed game time.
  4. This former Broncos quarterback sprained his ankle tripping over his dog, which was after he fell on a teammate’s driveway and knocked himself unconscious.

I’ll give you the title of a porn film. You tell me the director of the original and the year it was released.

  1. In Diana Jones and the Temple of Poon
  2. Throbin’ Hood, Prince of Beaves
  3. Breast Side Story
  4. Riding Miss Daisy

Identify the 2013 television show from where the following quote originated:

  1. “When I met you, I was perfectly happy with what I had – eating night cheese and transitioning my pajamas into day wear.”
  2. “Up yours, Proclone.”
  3. “Yes, all men must die. But we are not men.”
  4. “I watched Jane die. I was there. And I watched her die. I watched her overdose and choke to death. I could’ve saved her. But I didn’t.”

Identify the celebrities from their high school yearbook pictures.

See photo below.

Identify the artist and song from the misheard lyrics:

  1. “Let’s get fizzy cold, fizzy cold.”
  2. “My anus is the center hole.”
  3. “I’ve got two chickens to paralyze.”
  4. “I left my brains down in Africa.”

Identify the 2013 television show based on the following quote:

  1. “Not great, Bob!”
  2. “He’s hungry. My nipples are no use to him.”
  3. “People have judged me because of my eyebrow. I can’t control my eyebrow. I can’t control it. I can’t control what’s on my face 24/7."
  4. “My body is very attracted to your body, but when you speak, my brain gets angry.”

Identify the musical group from the details of their break-up.

  1. As Rolling Stone says: “When you put a bunch of junkies and a megalomaniac in a band together, the shit will hit the fan sooner or later.” Three years after their biggest album, they pushed out original drummer Steven Adler due to his severe drug addiction. Shortly thereafter, the lead singer started showing up for shows ridiculously late until one night they signed away the rights to the band’s name.”
  2. This duo managed to hold it together for 20 years until one brother showed up drunk to a show and kept screwing up the lyrics until the other brother smashed a guitar over his head and stormed out.
  3. In a 2007 Rolling Stone interview, this lead singer said of the band’s break-up: “We didn’t have a great deal in common. We were different generations, in Andy’s case, welded together by a flag of convenience. Part of the frustration was that Stewart and Andy were driven to write. It’s difficult to tell somebody it’s not a good song and it was usually me.”
  4. This group came unglued during a 1980 benefit show for Senator Alan Cranston. One member didn’t want the band involved in political causes and when the senator’s wife visited backstage, he said: “Nice to meet you, I guess.” That night, one of the other members started threatening the first band member on mic. “That’s three more, pal.” He was actually counting down the songs remaining before he administered a backstage beatdown.

We all know how embarrassing it is to give a wrong answer, particularly while under the pressure of your scowling teammates, but doing it on the air is another thing altogether. Provide the wrong answer to these easy questions:

  1. When asked “Where is Cambridge University” on “Beg, Borrow, or Steal”, this contestant gave this answer, home of the Kilworth House Theater, Bradgate Country Park, and Welford Road Stadium.
  2. When asked who had a worldwide hit with “What a Wonderful World” and then being prompted with hints such as “what do you call the part between your hand and your elbow” and “if you’re not weak, you’re….” and “what was Lord Mountbatten’s first name, this contestant came up with this member of the Rat Pack.
  3. When asked on “University Challenge” what Gandhi’s first name was, this contestant came up with this answer, which is what you get when you pinch somebody's butt and add a "y" at the end.
  4. When asked on “Richard and Judy” which American actor is married to Nicole Kidman, the contestant gave this answer, a title to an Oscar-winning Robert Zemeckis film.

Identify the movie from what’s considered to be one of the worst pieces of dialogue of all-time:

  1. “Must be weird not having anybody cum on you.”
  2. “I hate to disappoint you, but rubber lips are immune to your charms.”
  3. “Sack of wine!”
  4. “It’s turkey time. Gobble. Gobble.”

Identify the celebrity from the incredibly stupid quote:

  1. “Whenever I watch TV and see those poor starving kids all over the world, I can’t help but cry. I mean, I’d love to be skinny like that but not with all those flies and death and stuff.”
  2. “My sister is expecting a baby and I don’t know if I’m going to be an uncle or aunt.” Is attributed to Chuck Nevitt, a former North Carolina State basketball player explain to what deceased coach his reason for appearing nervous at practice.
  3. “Fiction writing is great. You can make up almost anything” is attributed to this famous wife, now ex-wife, after her first novel, “For Love Alone.”
  4. “Smoking kills. If you’re killed, you’ve lost a very important part of your life” is attributed to this “Blue Lagoon” star.

In honor of Donald Sterling, answer these questions about other racist figures in sports.

  1. This famed handicapper ended his career by uttering a diatribe on the superiority of the black athlete and Civil War breeding.
  2. What Washington Redskin player was Howard Cosell referring to with his infamous "little monkey" comment?
  3. What golfer said of Tiger Woods as Woods was running away with the 1997 Masters: "You pat him on the back and say congratulations and enjoy it and tell him not to serve fried chicken next year. Got it? Or collard greens or whatever the hell they serve.”
  4. What commentator, when questioned about why NASCAR driver Juan Pablo Montoya wasn't included on a top five drivers list said "he's out having a taco."

Identify the object of vilification given the song title and artist:

  1. Hank Williams, “Keep the Change”.
  2. 50 Cent, “Back Down”.
  3. Foo Fighters, “I’ll Stick Around”.
  4. Alanis Morissette, “You Oughta Know”.

Bonus Question #16

Name these celebrities from their high school yearbook photos
Name these celebrities from their high school yearbook photos

Tossup Questions With Answers

  1. Who is the only member of ZZ Top who doesn’t have a beard? (FRANK BEARD)
  2. Who were the first television couple to be shown in bed together on prime time television? (FRED AND WILMA FLINTSTONE)
  3. Who was the first Twitter user to reach 20 million followers? Her songs include The Edge of Glory, Judas, Born This Way, Bad Romance, and Poker Face? (LADY GAGA)
  4. Trivia team name trivia. Here’s the team name: “Was anyone surprised about Jodi Foster. She starred in a movie called The Beaver.” Who was the lead actor in The Beaver? (MEL GIBSON)
  5. Millicent Roberts is the middle and last name of what iconic children’s toy? (Barbie)
  6. “All that money, and he’s still got hair like a fucking dinner lady” is something said about Elton John by what former signer and author of the 1995 autobiography TAKE IT LIKE A MAN. (BOY GEORGE)
  7. According to David Letterman, Sarah Palin experienced an awkward moment at a Yankees game when her 14-year-old daughter, Willow, was knocked up by what player? (Alex Rodriguez)
  8. Both of these things come in a posh box: a Rolex and what British soccer star? (David Beckham)
  9. What former American Basketball Association player, when told that his planes departure time was 8 a.m. but would land in St. Louis at 7:59am due to a time zone change said “I ain’t goin’ on no time machine” and rented a car instead? (MARVIN BARNES)
  10. Based on a red carpet interview, of what Oscar-winning actor did Joan Rivers comment: “he makes Hitler look warm and funny”? The actor’s movies include Love Story, Eyes of Laura Mars, JFK, The Client, and The Fugitive . (TOMMY LEE JONES)
  11. More trivia team name triva. Here’s the team name: Stuffing Torrey’s Holes Like Tiger. In what state is Torrey Pines located? (CALIFORNIA)
  12. “His mother should have thrown him away and kept the stork” is a quote from this famous actress, who had a notorious feud with Raquel Welch. (MAE WEST)
  13. “He has Van Gogh’s ear for music” was a quote from this director, whose films include “Buddy Buddy”, “Fedora”, “The Front Page”, “The Fortune Cookie”, and “Irma la Douce”. (BILLY WILDER)
  14. “They can’t play baseball. They don’t wear sweaters. They’re not good dancers. They don’t play drums. They are never seen drinking cappuccino in Italian restaurants with oriental women.” Who are they? (FISH HEADS)
  15. More trivia team name trivia. Here’ the team name: “Lance Armstrong finally had the ball to come clean.” Armstrong was the second man to “win” the Tour five times in a row, so who was the only man to win the Tour five times in a row? (MIGUEL INDURAIN)
  16. “Germans are flummoxed by humor, the Swiss have no concept of fun, the Spanish think there is nothing at all ridiculous about eating dinner at midnight, and the Italians should never, ever have been let in on the invention of the motor car” is a quote by what writer, author of “A Short History of Nearly Everything” and “A Walk in the Woods”. (BILL BRYSON)
  17. What singer/actor gave Marilyn Monroe a white poodle named Mafia? (FRANK SINATRA)
  18. Who wrote Barry Manilow’s chart-topping hit “I Write the Songs?” (BRUCE JOHNSTON)
  19. “The Sad But True Story of Ray Mingus, The Lumberjack of Bulk Rock City, And His Never Slacking Stribe in Exploiting The So Far Undiscovered Areas of the Intention to Bodily Intercourse From the Opposite Species of his Kind During Intake of all the Mental Condition That Could Be Derived From Fermantation” is the longest song title ever at 305 characters by what group? (REDNEX)
  20. “I cut down trees. I eat my lunch. I go to the lavatory. On Wednesdays I go shopping and buttered scones for tea.” Who am I? (A LUMBERJACK)
  21. He had a reaction to the aluminum powder in his make-up and had to abandon his acting role to go to the hospital. Name this actor, the original Tin Man in The Wizard of Oz (BUDDY EBSEN)
  22. 1997’s “Perdita Durango”, directed by Alex de la Iglesia and starring Rosie Perez as the titular anti-heroine is the only sequel to any of David Lynch’s movie. Name it. (WILD AT HEART)
  23. Hoyt Axton, who plays inventor Rand Peltzer in “Gremlins” was a renowned singer/songwriter. His most famous song, “The Pusher” was covered by Steppenwolf and used in the soundtrack to what iconic Peter Fonda film? (EASY RIDER)
  24. “A Bug’s Life,” “Battle Beyond the Stars,” and “The Magnificent Seven” all owe a debt of gratitude to what Akira Kurosawa film? (THE SEVEN SAMURAI)
  25. More trivia team name trivia. Here’s the team name: “Bruce Willis is a ghost and Batman dies at the end also Gwyneth Paltrow’s head is in the box.” Name the three films. (THE SIXTH SENSE, THE DARK KNIGHT RISES, SEVEN)
  26. Nora Ephron was married to Nicholas Pileggi and used Henry Hill’s experiences in witness protection from Goodfellas for which of her films, starring Steve Martin? (MY BLUE HEAVEN)
  27. What Alfred Hitchcock film features a flushing toilet for the first time? (PSYCHO)
  28. The rock band Seven Mary Three formed in 1992 when Jason Ross and Jason Pollock met while attending The College of William and Mary. The band took its name from the radio call sign that the character Jon Baker used in what show? (CHIPS)
  29. Identify the artist or song from the misheard lyric: “Got my first real sex dream. I was five at the time. Played it till my fingers bled. It was the summer of 69.” (BRYAN ADAMS, SUMMER OF 69)
  30. “I didn’t attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it” is a quote from what American humorist and author. (MARK TWAIN)
  31. “Music journalists like Elvis Costello because music journalists look like Elvis Costello.” Was a quote from this musician whose solo albums include Skyscraper, A Little Ain’t Enough, and Diamond Dave. He was also the lead singer of a band, but was replaced by Sammy Hagar. (DAVID LEE ROTH)
  32. “My pony plays the mamba” is the misheard lyric from this song. The real lyric is “Marconi plays the mamba.” Name the song or group. (STARSHIP, WE BUILT THIS CITY)
  33. He was allergic to carrots. He was a famous voice artist. He voiced a famous cartoon character. The cartoon character was a rabbit. Who was he? (MEL BLANC)
  34. Billie Holiday was the babysitter for what future Oscar host? (BILLY CRYSTAL)

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Bonus Questions With Answers

Famous people often have cause to insult other famous people for one reason or another. I’ll provide a famous person and a quote, you tell me who they were referring to.

  1. Who was Winston Churchill referencing when he said: “My dear, you are ugly, but tomorrow I shall be sober, and you will still be ugly.” (MP Bessie Braddock)
  2. Who was Frank Sinatra referring to when he said: “Well, at least he has found his true love – what a pity he can’t marry himself.” (Robert Redford)
  3. Who was Bette Midler talking about when she said: “She loves nature, in spite of what it did to her.” (Princess Anne)
  4. Who was Liam Gallagher talking about when he said: “She can’t even chew gum and walk in a straight line, let alone write a book.” (Victoria Beckham)

Identify the following celebrities from their high school yearbook pictures.

  1. Glenn Beck
  2. Rachel Maddow
  3. Pamela Anderson
  4. Madonna

Identify the artist and song from the misheard lyrics:

  1. “Might as well face it, you’re a dick with a glove.” (ROBERT PALMER, ADDICTED TO LOVE)
  2. “Steak and a Knife, Steak and a Knife.” (BEE GEES, STAYIN’ ALIVE)
  3. “Let’s pee in the corner, let’s pee in the spotlight.” (REM, LOSING MY RELIGION)
  4. “You look like Medusa with Hair-Rollers in the night.” (MANFRED MANN’S EARTH BAND, BLINDED BY THE LIGHT)

Athletic injuries are no laughing matter, unless you’re one of these guys. Identify the sports star from the injury that sent him to the bench:

  1. This former cub missed three weeks with a back injury after he sneezed violently. (SAMMY SOSA)
  2. This former Atlanta Braves pitcher ironed his shirt… while he was wearing it. (JOHN SMOLTZ)
  3. This former Blue Jay, Indian, Cub, Giant, Mariner, Yankee, and Angel had a dream he was being chased by a giant spider, jumped out of bed, and sliced open his foot on a glass table. (GLENALLEN HILL)
  4. This Rockie broke his collarbone carrying deer meat up to his apartment. (CLINT BARMES)

I’ll give you the title of a porn film, you tell me the director of the real movie upon which it is based.

  1. Dyke Hard (JOHN MCTIERNAN)
  2. Sorest Rump (ROBERT ZEMECKIS)
  3. Saturday Night Beaver (JOHN BADHAM)
  4. Free My Willy (SIMON WINCER)

I’ll give you a singer or band who had a top 40 hit at the same time another singer or band had a top 40 hit with that singer or band’s name in it. You identify the other act.

  1. While the Beatles had 7 top 40 hits going, who had a top 40 hit with We Love You Beatles? (the Carefrees)
  2. While Bruce Springsteen had a hit with “Born to Run” who had a hit with “Bruce”? (Rick Springfield)
  3. While Nirvana had a hit with “Come as You Are” who had a hit with “Smells Like Nirvana”? (Weird Al)

Identify the actors in the following celebrity feuds given the description of their feud:

  1. This actress supposedly threw a coffee cup of urine in this director’s face when he wouldn’t let her take a bathroom break during a scene in his 1974 masterpiece. (FAYE DUNAWAY, ROMAN POLANSKI)
  2. This actor was saddled with a supposed gerbil rumor by his co-star, who also got him replaced in The Lords of Flatbush. (RICHARD GERE, SYLVESTER STALLONE)
  3. This feud goes all the way back to 1935 when this actress married the other actresses co-star in Dangerous, Franchot Tone. (BETTE DAVIS, JOAN CRAWFORD)
  4. These television co-stars have gone out it long after their show was cancelled with one actor calling the other “the biggest douche” and the other one complaining he was the only cast member not invited to the other’s wedding and that nobody cared that said actor had come out of the closet. (WILLIAM SHATNER, GEORGE TAKEI)

Identify the song and artist from the misheard lyric:

  1. “Because the night belongs to lawyers. Because the night belongs to lawyers.” (10,000 Maniacs, Because the Night)
  2. “I love the feel of Lorainne on my face. I love the taste of Lorainne on my lips.” (Eddie Rabbit, I Love a Rainy Night)
  3. “I’ll never leave your pizza burnin’.” (Rolling Stones, Beast of Burden)
  4. “You had to be a big shot ninja.” (Billy Joel, Big Shot)

One of Jimmy Kimmel’s funniest segments is Celebrities reading mean tweets. Identify the celebrity based on the tweet:

  1. “I’d would rather chop my arm off and fuck myself with my detached limb than watch “This singer: the movie”. What the fuck is wrong with the world? (KATIE PERRY)
  2. “Dear God, give us back 2Pack and we’ll give you this singer.” (JUSTIN BIEBER)
  3. “If you change the “I” in this actress’s last name to a “t”, you get Anna Farts. Interesting.” (ANNA FARIS)
  4. “This actress is so fucking ugly. Way too ugly to play snow white in snow white and the huntsman.” (KRISTEN BELL)

Athletic injuries are no laughing matter, unless you’re one of these guys. Identify the ports star from the injury that sent him to the bench:

  1. This former Brooklyn Dodgers pitcher with the same name as a former 49ers running back cut his hand while adjusting the strap of his wife’s bra. (ROGER CRAIG)
  2. This former Broncos quarterback injured his foot while getting off the couch. (JAKE PLUMMER)
  3. Now a city mayor, this former basketball player dislocated his shoulder giving his teammate a hug. (KEVIN JOHNSON)
  4. This former Baltimore Colt left guard, who was a key protector of QB Bert Jones, pulled his hamstring running onto the field for the coin toss. (ROBERT PRATT)

When celebrities attack other celebrities, we all benefit. Identify the person being spoken about given a celebrity and their insult.

  1. “He said now’s the time to get back to work. I thought, yeah you have to get back to work to buy crack. Crack doesn’t buy itself.” Spoken by Gilbert Gottfried about what politician? (Rob Ford)
  2. “She said that small towns, that’s the part of the country she really likes going to because that’s the pro-America part of the country. You know, I just want to say to her, just very quickly: fuck you.” Jon Stewart’s insult about whom? (Sarah Palin)
  3. Who did Don Rickles say this to: “Oh my God, look at you. Anyone else hurt in the accident?” (Ernest Borgnine)
  4. Of what actor did Mamie Van Doren say: “He’s the type of man who will end up dying in his own arms.” (Warren Beatty)

Identify these athletes based on an injury they sustained.

  1. This hall-of-famer was off to a white-hot start in 1986, hitting .404 as late as June 6. But that’s when he tried to kick off his cowboy boots in a Toronto hotel room, lost his balance, and fell ribs first onto the arm of a couch. He ended the year at .357. (WADE BOGGS)
  2. This former Padre, Ranger, Philly, Oriole, and Rockie, was so excited to open his double DVD copy of Backdraft and Happy Gilmore that he stabbed himself in the stomach trying to get the shrink wrap off. (ADAM EATON)
  3. This rotund Knicks center was just taking a break from practice when he sat on a blue physioball and it exploded. He scraped his wrist and missed game time. (EDDY CURRY)
  4. This former Broncos quarterback sprained his ankle tripping over his dog, which was after he fell on a teammate’s driveway and knocked himself unconscious. (BRIAN GRIESE)

I’ll give you the title of a porn film. You tell me the director of the original and the year it was released.

  1. In Diana Jones and the Temple of Poon (STEVEN SPIELBERG, 1984)
  2. Throbin’ Hood, Prince of Beaves (KEVIN REYNOLDS Kevin Costner version 1991)
  3. Breast Side Story (Jerome Robbins, Robert Wise, 1961)
  4. Riding Miss Daisy (Bruce Beresford, 1989)

Identify the 2013 television show from where the following quote originated:

  1. “When I met you, I was perfectly happy with what I had – eating night cheese and transitioning my pajamas into day wear.” (30 ROCK)
  2. “Up yours, Proclone.” (ORPHAN BLACK)
  3. “Yes, all men must die. But we are not men.” (GAME OF THRONES)
  4. “I watched Jane die. I was there. And I watched her die. I watched her overdose and choke to death. I could’ve saved her. But I didn’t.” (BREAKING BAD)

Identify the celebrities from their high school yearbook pictures.

  1. Sarah Palin
  2. Gwen Stefani
  3. Rene Zellweger
  4. Louis C.K.

Identify the artist and song from the misheard lyrics:

  1. “Let’s get fizzy cold, fizzy cold.” (OLIVIA NEWTON-JOHN, PHYSICAL)
  2. “My anus is the center hole.” (J. GEILS BAND, CENTERFOLD)
  3. “I’ve got two chickens to paralyze.” (EDDIE MONEY, TWO TICKETS TO PARADISE)
  4. “I left my brains down in Africa.” (TOTO, AFRICA)

Identify the 2013 television show based on the following quote:

  1. “Not great, Bob!” (MAD MEN)
  2. “He’s hungry. My nipples are no use to him.” (GREY’S ANATOMY)
  3. “People have judged me because of my eyebrow. I can’t control my eyebrow. I can’t control it. I can’t control what’s on my face 24/7.” (THE BACHELOR)
  4. “My body is very attracted to your body, but when you speak, my brain gets angry.” (THE MINDY PROJECT)

Identify the musical group from the details of their break-up.

  1. As Rolling Stone says: “When you put a bunch of junkies and a megalomaniac in a band together, the shit will hit the fan sooner or later.” Three years after their biggest album, they pushed out original drummer Steven Adler due to his severe drug addiction. Shortly thereafter, the lead singer started showing up for shows ridiculously late until one night they signed away the rights to the band’s name.” (GUNS N’ ROSES)
  2. This duo managed to hold it together for 20 years until one brother showed up drunk to a show and kept screwing up the lyrics until the other brother smashed a guitar over his head and stormed out. (THE EVERLY BROTHERS)
  3. In a 2007 Rolling Stone interview, this lead singer said of the band’s break-up: “We didn’t have a great deal in common. We were different generations, in Andy’s case, welded together by a flag of convenience. Part of the frustration was that Stewart and Andy were driven to write. It’s difficult to tell somebody it’s not a good song and it was usually me.” (THE POLICE)
  4. This group came unglued during a 1980 benefit show for Senator Alan Cranston. One member didn’t want the band involved in political causes and when the senator’s wife visited backstage, he said: “Nice to meet you, I guess.” That night, one of the other members started threatening the first band member on mic. “That’s three more, pal.” He was actually counting down the songs remaining before he administered a backstage beatdown. (THE EAGLES)

We all know how embarrassing it is to give a wrong answer, particularly while under the pressure of your scowling teammates, but doing it on the air is another thing altogether. Provide the wrong answer to these easy questions:

  1. When asked “Where is Cambridge University” on “Beg, Borrow, or Steal”, this contestant gave this answer, home of the Kilworth House Theater, Bradgate Country Park, and Welford Road Stadium. (LEICESTER)
  2. When asked who had a worldwide hit with “What a Wonderful World” and then being prompted with hints such as “what do you call the part between your hand and your elbow” and “if you’re not weak, you’re….” and “what was Lord Mountbatten’s first name, this contestant came up with this member of the Rat Pack. (FRANK SINATRA)
  3. When asked on “University Challenge” what Gandhi’s first name was, this contestant came up with this answer, which is the word for playfully pinching somebody's behind and adding a "y" on the end. (GOOSEY)
  4. When asked on “Richard and Judy” which American actor is married to Nicole Kidman, the contestant gave this answer, a title to an Oscar-winning Robert Zemeckis film. (FORREST GUMP)

Identify the movie from what’s considered to be one of the worst pieces of dialogue of all-time:

  1. “Must be weird not having anybody cum on you.” (SHOWGIRLS)
  2. “I hate to disappoint you, but rubber lips are immune to your charms.” (BATMAN AND ROBIN)
  3. “Sack of wine!” (TROY)
  4. “It’s turkey time. Gobble. Gobble.” (GIGLI)

Identify the celebrity from the incredibly stupid quote:

  1. “Whenever I watch TV and see those poor starving kids all over the world, I can’t help but cry. I mean, I’d love to be skinny like that but not with all those flies and death and stuff.” (MARIAH CAREY)
  2. “My sister is expecting a baby and I don’t know if I’m going to be an uncle or aunt.” Is attributed to Chuck Nevitt, a former North Carolina State basketball player explain to what deceased coach his reason for appearing nervous at practice. (JIM VALVANO)
  3. “Fiction writing is great. You can make up almost anything” is attributed to this famous wife, now ex-wife, after her first novel, “For Love Alone.” (IVANA TRUMP)
  4. “Smoking kills. If you’re killed, you’ve lost a very important part of your life” is attributed to this “Blue Lagoon” star. (BROOKE SHIELDS)

In honor of Donald Sterling, answer these questions about other racist figures in sports.

  1. This famed handicapper ended his career by uttering a diatribe on the superiority of the black athlete and Civil War breeding. (JIMMY THE GREEK)
  2. What Washington Redskin player was Howard Cosell referring to with his infamous "little monkey" comment? (ALVIN GARRETT)
  3. What golfer said of Tiger Woods as Woods was running away with the 1997 Masters: "You pat him on the back and say congratulations and enjoy it and tell him not to serve fried chicken next year. Got it? Or collard greens or whatever the hell they serve.” (FUZZY ZOELLER)
  4. What commentator, when questioned about why NASCAR driver Juan Pablo Montoya wasn't included on a top five drivers list said "he's out having a taco." (BOB GRIESE)

Identify the object of vilification given the song title and artist:

  1. Hank Williams, “Keep the Change”. (PRESIDENT OBAMA)
  2. 50 Cent, “Back Down”. (JA RULE)
  3. Foo Fighters, “I’ll Stick Around”. (COURTNEY LOVE)
  4. Alanis Morissette, “You Oughta Know”. (DAVE COULIER)

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2 comments

crankalicious profile image

crankalicious 2 years ago from Colorado Author

Thanks for reading!


jcgoloubev profile image

jcgoloubev 2 years ago from Yokohama-shi, Kanagawa, Japan

Excellent quiz!

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