The Super Smash Bros Drinking Game
Introduction: Super Smash Bros.
If you're here, then I'm sure you have at least heard of Nintendo's Super Smash Bros. If you haven't, then you either had a lame childhood or have lived in a cave for the entirety of your life. Super Smash Bros. is a fighting game featuring characters from some of Nintendo's most successful game franchises, including Pokémon, The Legend of Zelda, and Mario. The game was released exclusively for Nintendo game systems in 1999 and sold millions of copies within the first year. The game was such a success that it paved the way for multiple Super Smash Bros. installments to be released, including Super Smash Bros. Melee and Brawl games.
Needless to say, Super Smash Bros. has gone down as one of the most popular and successful games ever to be released for the Nintendo 64. It has been entertaining men, women, and children of all ages across the world for almost 15 years now. So, now that you have a very brief history lesson of the game, let's get to the part where we start drinking.
Here's What You Need
In order for this drinking game to be a complete success, I am going to give you an incredibly detailed list outlining exactly what you will need. Here it goes:
- A Nintendo 64 and appropriate cords
- Nintendo 64 controllers (depending on how many people will be getting in on the action)
- Super Smash Bros. game
- Friends, acquaintances, to-be friends, strangers, homeless people, your teacher, the guy who picks up your garbage, your dentist, anyone and everyone you want
- A television, the bigger the better, obviously
- Beer (or any alcohol of your choosing)
Pretty simple, yes?
Now that you've got everything you need to get the party started, it's time to play. Before you start every round, be sure you have an ice cold beer in front of you. Or wine. Or vodka. Or absinthe. Just pick your poison and make sure you have a full drink in front of you. Pick your character, stage, and seating arrangements. It's almost time to get started.
It's time to set the rules. Make the game a stock game, rather than a timed games. Killing your friends (well, their characters) doesn't have to be timed. While you're there, change the game to a five stock game. Lastly, the items. Go to the item select screen and turn on the following:
- Invincibility Star
- Home Run Bat
These are all the items you need; well, for this version of the game, at least. Once you have set your rules, chosen your character, the game stage, and have a comfortable seat with a full drink in front of you, you're ready to start.
When the game starts, so does the drinking. Here's when you'll be chug-a-lugging:
- When you lose a life, take a drink.
- If you get the Invincibility Star, drink for the duration of your invincibility. That's right, put your controller down, pick up your drink, and chug til the music stops.
- If someone hits you with a Bomb-Omb, take a gulp.
- If you hit a bumper, take a drink for every single hit.
- If you throw a Pokeball and its one of those damn Goldeen, drink away until that little guy has stopped uselessly flopping back and forth.
- If you get KO'd by a home-run bat, you have been embarrassed and will finish your drink.
- If you commit suicide, take two drinks. Killing yourself is more shameful than getting killed.
At the end of the round, the kills leader gets to distribute the number of kills he/she got during the match to anyone in the room. Get 8 kills? Give all 8 drinks to the hottie on the other side of the room. Two hotties? Give each one four. Get the picture?
And with a winner, there has to be a loser. And when there are empty bottles and cans at the end of the round, someone has to throw them away. So why not the loser? Loser wears all the cans and bottles used during that round. I don't care how, you'll find a way. Put them in your pocket, between your man (or woman) breasts, between your legs, up your butt. Doesn't matter. Give that trash a home, just not the garbage can.
Gargle, rinse, repeat. Play until you cannot play anymore. And, trust me, the time will come eventually.
Games like this literally have endless possibilities in terms of making new rules, adjustments, etc. I'm sure your creative mind will wander during the game and that little light bulb will flash on top of that smart brain of yours. Come up with something good and comment on this video; I'd love to know how you folks play. Heck, if I like it enough, I'll put in the article and will be sure to site you in it!
So, be creative, have fun, and most importantly, please be responsible. The same rule applies to any drinking instance. No drinking and driving. No drinking and skateboarding. No drinking and riding pets. Just don't do it. It's not worth your safety.
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