Why Does One Choose Suicide?

I just received a call from my Daughter-in-law. Her brother shot himself in the chest with a shot gun. They don't expect him to make it through the night. And yes it was self inflicted. Why? I really do not know. I could make a lot of guesses, but probably will never get it right. He is 46, nice looking man, a body builder. He has a wife, 2 great sons, a grandson and granddaughter, and is very prosperous. It is baffling to me why one would do this. I cannot imagine taking my own life. By doing so I would be hurting the people that I love with all my heart and leaving them with such a terrible thing to deal with.

I had a 19 year old brother that shot himself. He was angry with his Dad. He too used a shotgun. But it was instant death for him. My Mother was devastated for years. My Father also shot himself. For the life of me I do not understand how someone can take their own life. I just wonder what goes through their head as they are in the process of doing this act of selfishness. Yes, to me it is selfish. They surely are not thinking of the ones left behind to find the body, to ask WHY?, to have so many unanswered questions, to deal with the grief of such a horrible act. Not to mention the interrogation by the police. Of course this is to be expected, but the family is already reeling from the shock of the unexpected and then the police are throwing all these questions at you and you are slow to think because of the images in your head of the scene that you have just witnessed. And these images stick with you for the rest of your life. Believe me it is so surreal. The one that commits this act of course does not think of what they are going to put their family and friends through. They are only thinking of their own misery as they put the thought into motion.

I try to defend them in some way, to try to make some sense of it. I would think one has to be so deeply in pain, mentally, physically or emotionally that they cannot think clearly at all. Things must be in slow motion in their minds and they just can't quite get past the moment of decision to keep them from following through. I think maybe if they would just wait 10 minutes, sleep on it, wait til in the morning, maybe they wouldn't do it. But then who knows? My Dad planned his death for some time before he shot himself. I have thought about this much over the years and to me when it comes to suicide there is a fine line between courage and cowardice. It has to take great courage to put that gun to your head, knowing the end result and pulling the trigger. Then on the flip side it is a cowardice way out of life because you do not want to face your problems and work through them. I think most of the time there is no preventing someone who is determined. In an instant it is all over, an instant, with no turning back.

I wonder what their last thoughts are before they pull the trigger, or run their car into a tree, or whatever other way one commits suicide. Do they think at the last second ' I want to live ' but it's just to late? Do they talk to God? Do they cry? Do they wish someone would stop them? The questions never end. Then the ones left behind feel guilty.' If only I had done this or done that.' ' I should have known.' I know I felt the same way, thought the same thoughts. But it is over and done, nothing can be done and probably never could have been done, because we cannot read others minds. We cannot always know how they are feeling. And of course we never think a loved one would do such a horrendous thing. So here we are left with the questions and the guilt, sitting in stunned disbelief. If you have never been through it, I do so hope you never have to go through it.

I cannot imagine ever taking my life, but then I have never been at rock bottom. I hope never to be there to get a glimpse of why someone would take their own life. All I can say is love each other and be kind to each other. Say, ' I love you' every chance you get. Your kinds words may, or may not, save someone from themselves someday. But you will know that they knew you loved them. You have to remember if someone close to you chooses to take their life, it is not your fault. It is ultimately their choice. Chances are there is nothing you could have said or done to change their mind. Life is so precious, and suicide is just a total waste of life when there are many who are struggling to stay alive.

I just got the call and he did not make it. Another grieving family, for such a senseless act. My thoughts and prayers go out to them.

Comments 53 comments

_cheryl_ profile image

_cheryl_ 6 years ago from California

Such a sad story. I do agree that in the end, it is ultimately their choice. Doesn't make it any easier to deal with, but it has to be viewed with that fact in mind. I've never been in that dark of a place in my life so I know I have no room to talk. I do strongly believe that as humans, we naturally are weak in flesh. It's important to do all we can to strengthen our minds to prevent us from falling into a mentality of choosing suicide.

Your hub has brought this quote to my mind: "Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring, all of which have the potential to turn a life around." ~ Leo Buscaglia

Sorry to hear of such a loss, and may his family be blessed to find peace through this all.


singlmomat52 profile image

singlmomat52 6 years ago Author

Thank you for your thoughts. The quote is beautiful and so very true. Even when we do theses things though, with the mind set of some it will have no effect on. But so true, we must try. At least in trying we know we have done the best that we can, the best our hearts have to give. The rest is up to them. Thank you again.


sheila b. profile image

sheila b. 6 years ago

It's my belief that many who commit suicide are so depressed they just cannot go on. And while in that frame of mind, they feel they are a burden to everyone. They convince themselves their loved ones will be better off without them and their problems.


singlmomat52 profile image

singlmomat52 6 years ago Author

I agree with you. There are so many grey areas with suicide it is truly hard to detect when one may be thinking in that direction. In my experience with it there have been several reasons that were the possibility and this, as you mentioned, is one of them. Thank you for sharing.


Dim Flaxenwick profile image

Dim Flaxenwick 6 years ago from Great Britain

Oh I am so sorry for what has happened but cannot possibly know how helful. how timely this hub came for me. I am in a terrible situation at the moment where someone I love keeps threatening suicide and has even spelled out to me how she will do it.

Her sister phoned and told. me that whatever happens I mustn't blame myself, I know your suffering must be horrendous, yet I have to thank you for making me feel not so alone. God bless x


singlmomat52 profile image

singlmomat52 6 years ago Author

You are not alone Dim. I am sorry for what you are going through. But as I said, you do what you can ,especially since she has spelled it out for you. If she is determined to do it, it is out of your hands. She will find a way when no one is looking. So please do not blame yourself if she follows through. It is her choice. I know that doesn't make you feel any better, but it will be by her own hand. Just keep loving her and praying for her, that's the best you can do. God bless you Dim.


Dim Flaxenwick profile image

Dim Flaxenwick 6 years ago from Great Britain

Thank you very much. I do try to show her love, remind her her she is worth more than she allows herself to think and always, always listen, if she just wants to talk. Yet still there are days when nothing helps and wants to end it all.

I am very grateful for you replying to me. It weighs heavy on me sometimes because I know she tell no-one else the full extent of her feelings. Thank you so much my new friend. God bless. xxxxx


singlmomat52 profile image

singlmomat52 6 years ago Author

I can only imagine how this must be on your mind 24/7, just wondering when it will happen. That is no way to live, It's like you are holding your breath waiting for that call. It is good that she shares with you but she does not realize the heaviness she has put on your shoulders and on your heart. I am praying for you and her Dim, that there will be peace for you both. You obviously are a loving, caring friend, she is blessed to have you in her life. She is blessed to still have her life. If you need to talk you make contact me anytime. God bless Dim. xxxx


Dim Flaxenwick profile image

Dim Flaxenwick 6 years ago from Great Britain

Thank you very much. You have been a great help. So glad you wrote that hub.!!

I hope your daughter-in-law and all the family are coping with this latest horrendous incident. God Bless, Dim x


singlmomat52 profile image

singlmomat52 6 years ago Author

Many of my Hubs I write in hopes that it will touch or help someone. I am so glad that this is one that will hopefully help you in some small way.

They are coping as well as possible. His wife is blaming herself. Just sad situation all the way around. Thank you for your concerns for them.

Take care Dim. God bless xxx


meja 6 years ago

thanks madre i love all your hubs but thanks for this one especially it means alot you are the best madre love ya lots and bunches


singlmomat52 profile image

singlmomat52 6 years ago Author

To you, Meja, I say 'I am so sorry for your loss. I pray for comfort, peace and strength for you and your family.' God bless! Love your Madre


demorfellis 6 years ago

I appreciated this well-written hub and the kind, supportive thoughts you have expressed. I do take exception, though, to your characterization of suicide as a selfish act--although I often hear that from people. For many suicide victims (and survivors of suicide attempts), they are thinking almost exclusively of their loved ones. They believe with all their hearts that they are the cause of so much pain and trouble to their family and friends that their death would provide them with relief. When I attempted suicide, I didn't feel like I couldn't deal with my own pains, but rather that my depression was causing those I loved so much anguish that, in time, my death would bring them great relief.


singlmomat52 profile image

singlmomat52 6 years ago Author

I am glad that you did not succeed in your attempt. I stand corrected, at the time I wrote this the painful memories it brought back made me angry that my Father took his life. I am sure that the reasons could go both ways, selfish or not. It is a very deep process one goes through for either the suicide victim or those left behind. So please forgive me for being selfish in my pain. Thank you so much for reading my Hub and for your comment. I also wrote 'When Time Stood Still' about my Dads suicide. Thanks again.


jon86 6 years ago

One month ago, I woke up late in the morning with a single thought on my mind. I dressed, walked to my gun cabinet, and took out a Chinese type 56 infantry rifle. I cased it, opened an ammo box, and withdrew a single 7.62x39 cartridge. I left a note on the kitchen cupboard, got in my truck and drove about a half hour to a secluded chopping. I got out, took the gun out of it's case, and dropped to me knees. I cocked the weapon, placed the muzzle on my forehead and pulled the trigger. I repeated this about a half dozen times. I pulled the bullet from my pocket, pushed into the magazine, and chambered the round. I looked at the sky for a couple minutes, listening to the sounds of nature on a late summer day. I put the barrel to my head, and clicked off the saftey. Then I started to push the trigger. All I could think about was the people who cared about me, and as the trigger began to break I moved, and sent the shot thundering past my head. I looked down at the empty smoking casing laying in the dirt, and was overcome with fear. I have never told anyone about that day. Someday I will forget thier love, and soak the earth with my blood.


singlmomat52 profile image

singlmomat52 6 years ago Author

jon86, I am so glad that did not pull that trigger on yourself. Please don't ever do that!!! You cannot ever forget their love, it will always be with you in your mind and especially in your heart. Tomorrow is always a new day and you never know what that day will hold. I do not know why you were going to do this but I do know that loves wins out overall, and the people that care about you must love you very much for you to stop at the last second and turn the gun away. That love is what stopped you, that love got in the way of that bullet, that love is more powerful than your thoughts, that love pulled you through. Please hang in there and let your loved ones love you back and one day you will look back and be so grateful that you stayed with them. God bless you always!!!!!!


jon86 6 years ago

I know what tommorow holds. Dissapointment and heartache. Life's an awful brute, the sooner gains the courage to liberate oneself from it, the better. My loved ones will learn to cope. If they care, they will understand and accept.


singlmomat52 profile image

singlmomat52 6 years ago Author

Yes life can be brutal, but life is not always brutal. If you do this you are right they will have no choice but to learn to cope. But is that fair to you or them?? Please do not do this, you were given life for a reason, your life means something, your life is important to those who love you, your life must be important to you!! You do not know what tomorrow holds, not one of us do!! When my Dad shot himself it haunted me for years!! I wondered why he did it? What was he thinking when he pulled the trigger?? I loved my Dad as did my kids and my and his other grandkids. I miss him to this day. I think of all the things he could have taught my boys, all the rich history he could have told them of, all the love he could have gave them and they him.

This too shall pass! Please just give yourself some time, work through whatever it is that is bothering you. Please love yourself and accept the love your family has to give. They need you!!! You need them!!!


jon86 6 years ago

Do not trouble yourself with the passing of a stranger, people die everyday. There is nothing to let pass, there is only what is, what always has been, and what shall remain. I see you are a woman of Christ. I am familiar with your text, and it's two siblings. I ask this of you: if there is an afterlife, pray I see niether heaven or hell, pray that I pass on as if I never was, and if I have a soul, that it will fade to the shadow from whence it came, and be as nothing. Do not let one death trouble your mind. 23 years is longer than I cared to have stayed anyway.


singlmomat52 profile image

singlmomat52 6 years ago Author

23 years isn't long enough, you have your whole life ahead of you!! Why do you feel the need to take your own life. Can you at least tell me that?


Dewey Cheatem profile image

Dewey Cheatem 6 years ago

I never really understood the finality of death. I had lost uncles and grandparents but I thought....this IS normal. Then one day the phone rang and it was my brother who had been in a bad accident. I never thought he would die as I drove to the hospital. When I got to the hospital I learned that he had died. I walked into the room and looked at my Mother sitting next to his bed in the trauma room. The tears rolling down her face haunt me to this day. I hope jon86 thinks about the people in his life who love him. I never understood the devastation of a close relative dying. My brother died seven years ago. My Mother's face still has those tears on it. Even when she laugh's, it's not the same laugh that I remember. Life is full of ups and downs. Sometimes the downs seem to take forever to get over. The ups never last long enough. BUT you do have to look for them.


jon86 6 years ago

Why do you care where my reasoning lay? I suppose I could show you the world through my eyes as some small contribution, but to what Singlemom?

As for Dewey; Do not pretend to know the depths of my lows, and do not patronize me for my choice, I know full well the effect this will have on my family. I have not made the decision lightly, I suffer with the guilt of it daily. But I am sorry for your loss, especially for your mother.


singlmomat52 profile image

singlmomat52 6 years ago Author

jon86 I care because I am a mom of two sons, my youngest is 26. It would rip my world apart if anything happened to either of my boys. I care because your life has meaning. No Mother wants to bury their child, we are suppose to go before our children. Do you have children?? If so, how would you feel if it was your child having the feelings that your are having? Would you not do all you could to discourage such thoughts? No I am not your mother, but you have reached out to me for some reason. Why???


jon86 6 years ago

I didn't reach out to you, I posted this cause I thought it was fitting place. You want to know, fine. My name is Jonathan, I'm 23, 6 foot 1, broad shoulders, brown hair, brown eyes. I'm a fourth year machinist apprentice. My life has been a slow downward decline since I hit middle school. I found it difficult to cope with the sudden change as people tried to figure themselves out by trying out different personas. High school was a bit of a prick, I hated the works of it. Things got no better as time progressed, I started a trade in an economic downturn, and found it hard to get going. I moved away from friends and family to a crap job, and hated it. My closest friend knifed me in the back soon after, I loved him as a brother, I have never recovered from this. I found a job in a city I loved, living with one my dearest friends. The company I worked for went under, and I lost my job, a job I loved. i was forced to move home. The same year my teenage sister was diagnosed with a serious spinal disease. Recently I lost my new job in a mass layoff, had a head with an Oak tree with my best friend in his jeep, and lost the only woman I have ever loved in the span of three days. I have had 7 girlfriends in my life, and she is the only one I have loved. She shared with me her most intimate secrets, and worries, and gave me her heart. I gave her mine, with all I had I gave her my love. And as we were becoming a couple, up comes a man from her past. She took her heart back, and tossed mine. I have never suffered such emotional trauma in my life. I have excluded details, and many other events to keep it brief.

I awoke this morning to my best friend banging my window, for a breakfast invitation. Later another close friend , and I went scouting for game. We're going grouse hunting tommorow. I sat at the bar this evening with my Rugby team after practice planning our game this weekend. I will also help a freind clear land for his home, and attend a house party, and see a movie. This is how i appear on the outside. Happy, social.

on the inside i'm bleeding and hurting from each successive blow, culminating in the loss of her love. Each morning her beauty is chased away by the sunlight, and I awake with tears in my eyes. No one knows, the shame I carry for these feelings, or the hopelessness i feel inside. Perverse that now a complete stranger knows.


singlmomat52 profile image

singlmomat52 6 years ago Author

jon, I am so sorry for your loss. This is something you have to give yourself time to get over. I have been deeply hurt too many times by many people, I will not pretend to know the depth of your pain, but your pain is nothing to be ashamed of. You have a right to grieve, and I am sure that you do feel hopeless, but there is always hope. I told you last night this too shall pass, and it shall, but you have to give yourself time to heal.

I am sorry that you have learned at such a young age the pain of heartache. But you are young and strong and you have a lot going for you, and yes you do have your whole life ahead of you. I know the pain feels like it will never go away, but given time it will. Sometimes when I am hurting and it just feels like my very soul is sick from it, then I just put those thoughts to the back of my mind and get busy doing something, and each time that thought tries to ease in I push it back. Then as time passes and I can breath a little better, til I am healed in my spirit, then I can think back on that pain then let it go and move on. I know it is not easy, but it is how we get through the storms in our lives. And we all have storms.

I am by no means minmizing your pain and grief, I know your pain is genuine, but listen to me, it is not worth taking your life over. Take one day at a time and give yourself time to grieve and one day you smile again and it will come from the inside. There is a young woman out there that will love you unconditionally, whom you will have beautiful babies with. Do you want to miss out on seeing your little boy or little girls eyes light up when they see you? Please all I am asking is give yourself time, your young and healthy. There are people who would give anything to be healthy, people battling life threatening diseases, people who have very little time left and yet they are fighting for each and every second to live.

So just give it time, the pain will ease and you will be able to move on with your life. Things will not always be blue skies and ice cream, but we must learn to dance in the rain when it storms.

I am glad you posted a comment here. I thank you for sharing your heartache with me, I do understand better now, but give yourself time and one day you will think back and say I can breath again and you will wish her well in your mind and let it go.

Just take one hour at a time, then one day at a time. It sounds as though you have a lot of love to give, don't deprive some special woman of experiencing your love, and do not cheat yourself of the love you will recieve in return. It will come. Just give it time, please.


jon86 6 years ago

She is but a small piece. look at this world, and see the hatered, and agony that fills it, I don't wish to stay here. I'm not going to. Next week I will die from gunshot, or nitrogen inhalation, whichever my resources can allow. I am not sad to die,I am happy to escape. This is not your fault.


singlmomat52 profile image

singlmomat52 6 years ago Author

Well, you will be missed and although I do not know you, it makes me very sad that the world will lose a great young man who could have made a difference in this world that has hate and agony, you must remember that in your frame of mind that is all you are seeing. There is more love and joy than you know, or will let yourself know. And yes, you could make a difference. How?? One kind act at a time, one smile at a time, one kind word at a time, one small touch at a time, one great thought at a time, one breath at a time. They say that if you do something for someone else it always makes you feel better, I know this to be true.

I do hope that you change your mind and one day I get a comment from you saying that you chose to live and are very happy. You feel empty now, but given time you will feel that hollowness gone and joy will be the filler.

I know this is not my fault, but I hurt for you and know from my own experience it takes time to deal with the pain. I will be honest with you, once many, many years ago, I was in similar pain and it crossed my mind, but I wanted to live and realized no one or no thing is worth taking my life over. I am happy and grateful that I am here today!!

I am praying for you, praying for healing in your spirit and your joy to return. I will not pray for the things you have asked me to. May God bless you always.


jon86 6 years ago

My concern for the people in my life stays my hand. I feel as though I am doing something very selfish. Like I am harming them not me. But in the end I must make choices that are best for me. This is the hardest decicision I have ever had to make.


singlmomat52 profile image

singlmomat52 6 years ago Author

If you do this you will devastate the people in your life, your family and your friends. Some of them will blame themselves and will be haunted by it the rest of their lives. It is good that your concern for them stays your hand, and truly they will be the ones left behind to deal with it all ~ the whys, the how could he do this, the guilt, the what ifs, the arrangements, seeing the pain in others eyes, feeling their own pain so deep they do not want to be in their own body, and then reminded daily for years to come by the emptiness they feel with you not there. So I do hope you choose life, you are important, and obviously you are loved!!


jon86 6 years ago

Your words hurt. How can I sit through this despair, and disappointment, that's all that ever comes! This is a prison, and the only way out is through a wall of people's hearts. I don't want to go any further, I want peace.


singlmomat52 profile image

singlmomat52 6 years ago Author

I am sorry that I hurt you, but my words do not hurt as bad as your death will hurt those that love you. We all have despair, heartache and disappoiment in our lives. It is how we grow and learn. Without these how would we ever know the true joy and happiness of the UPs in our lives. It is through trials that we learn to cope with the storms and appreciate the sunshine!!

I am glad that wall is there, but you have to realize that wall of poeples hearts and love is your support system, they will help you in any way possible. Don't push through the wall, embrace it, let them help you get through this tough time. Don't be ashamed to tell them of your despair. You sound like a very smart young man, this pain will ease and eventually you will let it go completely, the pain you would cause will never go away!


jon86 6 years ago

I suppose you are right. You are older, and I must yeild to your greater wisdom. In this festering culture of moral decay, I find these people are all that matter. Life is hard enough for them as it is, I will not contribute to thier burden. I will live for them, and them alone, life for me will be a gift of selflessness. I will have to get up out of this hole, to what end I'm not sure, I'm certain the powers that be will hurl to it's depths again. I used to think that if a man worked hard he would come ahead. That if he loved he would be loved in return. But I'm discovering that as my age grows, my knowledge shrinks, and that I am certain of nothing. I can't grasp our culture, or the people it encompasses. A man does not prosper now on the sweat of his brow, he either gets by on the grace of the wealthy, or joins thier ranks, and prospers on the backs of the poor. A man who is loving, caring, and faithful is not rewarded, he is no longer the social norm, he is an obsolete relic of a forgotten age. But I will carry on with family and friends in mind.


singlmomat52 profile image

singlmomat52 6 years ago Author

I am proud of you for thinking this through, you will be glad that you made the choice to live. Just breath and take one day at a time, it will get better. Please take care of yourself and let me hear from you from time to time and let me know how things are. I am glad that you reached out whether it be conciously or not, you did reach out for some reason.

What good you do will come back to you, it is the law of the Universe!!

God bless you and take care.


jon86 6 years ago

Can't do it anymore. I realized thier pain will have no relevance after I am dead, i won't be here to see. I can't do this anymore, and I'm not.


singlmomat52 profile image

singlmomat52 6 years ago Author

Nor can I, I wish you well and hope that you change your mind. I have done all I can to help you through this. Take care and God bless.


Healing Touch profile image

Healing Touch 6 years ago from Minnetonka, MN

singlemomat52,

Your hub is helpful. I just wrote on youth suicide in my hub. Please check it out. It is called Dear Dear Lord, Why?

I hope this jon in these comments is not real, for if he is he needs to call a crisis line. There is one in every state.

Every crisis line is free and you can talk talk talk.

God bless you singlemom52 and jon if your real


ahorseback profile image

ahorseback 6 years ago

Singlemom, This is an excellent hub , and I feel for your loss' , no one should have to experience these things,...... Jon86 , if you only knew how a life can change for the better in time! You are very young in the cycle of life, A lot of lifes greatest expeiences await you and the losses you think are so large now , will seem small in the future. Give it time ....give the losses time and you will see how the dissapointments of life diminish with this passing of time, it sounds a bit like the anxieties get to you . I don't know you at all, but depression is a dark , dark place , and I have been there , You said you like to hunt and spend time in nature , that may be your salvation,it was mine ! Go there and seek serenity. There is a little light that you see in the end of the tunnel, each day , each time you see it. Go to it. Tomorrow is a better day . Peace is the answer , seek it.


ahorseback profile image

ahorseback 6 years ago

Great job talking about this serious subject and sharing your life! Singlemom, I am torn about the choices that some have to make , There is always a reason to try harder at life's trials though. Our tomorrows are full of promise. Yes! Thanks again for sharing your life.


singlmomat52 profile image

singlmomat52 6 years ago Author

Healing Touch thank you so much for stopping in. This is a hard subject to write about but my hopes are that it will help someone in need. Thank you for your comment!

ahorseback, I do appreciate that you read my hubs, and I thank you for reading these comments as well. As you can see I have said all I can to jon86 in hopes that he would change his mind. Thank you as well for lending your kind words to his situation. I hope that one day he will look back and say I am glad I took their advice. There is another hub that I wish he would read that I wrote, When Time Stood Still, it is about my Dad's suicide. This is a devastating action to take to all involved. He is very young and I do hope he thinks before he acts. Thank you for stopping in and for your comments, they are always welcome!! And you are very welcome!!


ahorseback profile image

ahorseback 6 years ago

Singlemom, I have read our hub , 'when time stood still', I truely feel for you and anyone going through that. The nightmare of suicide is just that. And as with all survivors of these things , abuse , suicide ,rape, it is the survivors who pay the heaviest costs. Some go through life making a huge wave and the rest have to deal with the consequences , I hope jon86 is just out for a little attention . It became easy for me in my maturing to accept that I've done all I can for a certain type of people, always a good listener ,at times I think some will take advantage of you for that. You are the type to always help , some will always take. Stay well and positive , you are a blessing to all.


singlmomat52 profile image

singlmomat52 6 years ago Author

Thank you for your kind words but this is just who I am. I was born with a kind, compassionate heart and I want no attention for it. I love people and I feel that life is very fragile, it wouldn't be the fact that I saved someones life, it would just be the fact that someones life goes on. It really frightened me, this young man still learning what life is all about, thinking of chucking it all and snuffing out his future. I am really not sure how to explain this. If I could be a healer of people, totally anonomously, I would like that. I want no accolades, I just love to help. Thanks for coming back and commenting, and you are a blessing to all as well my friend. Thank You!!


vrajavala profile image

vrajavala 5 years ago from Port St. Lucie

I have to disagree with you, when you say that when one commits suicide, "it's ultimately their choice."

Our body was given to us by God.

For those who kill themselves, their karma will be to exist as a ghost, jealously trying to inhabit someone else's body.


singlmomat52 profile image

singlmomat52 5 years ago Author

Everyone has their own personal belief and if you think about it we all have minds of our own and ultimately the choices we make ARE our own. Thanks for your comment.


pris 5 years ago

ahorseback y a u attacking john n saying he jst wants attention none of us choose this. i bought poison bt the thought of my mum's greef the day they tel ha of ma death stops me. i jst dnt knw how long i'll keep on.


Sad and Hopeless 4 years ago

Sorry, the above asdf post is me, just checking to see if I had to sign in or not to post.

I'm not going to say I'm sorry for your pain, because I don't know or care about you, but if it happened to me, I definitely would not like it, but would accept it as a part of life.

You say:

"Then on the flip side it is a cowardice way out of life because you do not want to face your problems and work through them"

Of course you think it's cowardice, because it's more convenient to blame them than to try and understand them because you cannot wrap your mind around what they were going through.

Do you think people with terminal illness "do not want to face their problems and work through them"? I'm suuure you meant to say that for except those people, everyone else is a coward.

No one asked to be born, no one asked for their problems, and no one is forced to live except by people like you that have their fear-of-death mechanism kicking into overdrive. Understand that you are a biological machine that is installed and designed with features to prevent your death because life wants to use you as a tool to go on, and when someone close to you dies, your own mortality comes into question because that person that just passed was somehow contributing to your own survival.

Herein lies the problems with humans, our imagination far exceeds our grasp. We can imagine a heaven, beautiful angels, and life after death, but it just isn't so. How do I KNOW this? because I understand how human beings work and operate. I don't care how complex or sophisticated someone thinks they are, I know why you do everything you do, and it's just boring really.

I am suicidal myself. What does that mean besides being bored with life? It means, to me, that I have realized that I have been born with a brain that does not correctly function to produce a constant and stable mood to function in life(out of my control). It also means that I have tried medication, therapy, counseling, and a host of other treatments(big pharma). It also means that I have to ask myself, "should I stay a live in unending mental pain and psychic agony just so my family and friends don't have to deal with my death, or should I consider sympathy for myself, and just leave so as to not suffer any longer?"(the selfish core of all humans)

The people who think it's cowardly have been spoon fed religion. If the message was "It's ok to kill yourself if you don't have the resources or even the genetic disposition to see yourself out of the unending pain, or it is just a personal choice for whatever the reason", there will be no one left for religion to control.

You have been taught to "pray" when someone dies or is in pain, because you would rather not go out of your way or spend your resources to truly help them but still want to feel like you did something. You really think someone is listening to you when you pray? There is nothing listening to you, that's you deluding yourself because you prefer illusion rather than despair.

Study hard, and understand that most of what you have been ALLOWED to learn is complete garbage made to program you into a good little worker bee.

People didn't get married until the church came along, heaven didn't exist until the church came along, and when people killed themselves to get into heaven faster, the church said "uh oh, there will be no one left to control", so then hell came along. How convenient.

Sorry, but you are all religious saps that one, cannot function any other way, and two, cannot grasp at the fact that death is a part of life and it can come at any moment, either by will, or by way, and all the exercise and healthy eating you have done didn't do a damn thing to stop it. You have been taught to FEAR death to buy into all the religious/spiritual/medical/pharmaceutical nonsense just to make a profit for them.

Wake up, there is no God, there was no God, and there never will be, whoever thought of it, is the greatest genius of all time.

Religion would have been a good thing if it was actually administered by a benevolent God, but consider the source ever since it surfaced with no actual proof of who brought it here.

So it is truly you who are selfish because you cannot deal with the reality of life. Good day to you.


singlmomat52 profile image

singlmomat52 4 years ago Author

Thank you for reading my Hub. You are entitled to your opinion just as we all are. You have your beliefs and I have mine and I will say this to you, I would rather live my life as if there is a God and die to find out there isn't , than life my life as if there isn't a God and die to find out there is. Good day to you.


wearenotthesame00 profile image

wearenotthesame00 4 years ago from My Own Fantasy World...

Most commit suicide because they feel so put down, depressed and useless. They feel like they can't free themselves so the only way to be free from being miserable life is to escape, in this case, to die.

Others, it's just the state of mind they're at during that time. And to many that commit suicide, they don't think life's precious, but miserable, a disaster, horrible, etc. They couldn't handle the pain, and they felt like they couldn't do it anymore.

For example, most of my friends are atheist, so they don't say prayers, 'cause it's their belief. They were just hoping someone would come along the way and free them from what they were in whether abuse, rape, or etc.

Everyone has a reason why they do something, just like committing suicide. Whether it being their last outlet, only escape or just to feel free. They all have a reason behind the tragedy.


singlmomat52 profile image

singlmomat52 4 years ago Author

wearenotthesame00 thank you for your comment and yes you are right there are many different reasons for this sad act against ones own soul. We are all alone in our heads and sometimes anothers words do help but then sometimes it is something they do not want to hear so do not take in and consider good sound advice. Thank you again for stopping in and reading. It is interesting to get others thoughts on this tragic subject. Blessings!


wearenotthesame00 profile image

wearenotthesame00 4 years ago from My Own Fantasy World...

You're welcome...


NP.QUEEN profile image

NP.QUEEN 4 years ago from Dubai

Hi singlmomat52

I think if we opened our mind to somebody i mean if we discuss our matters to others definitely we will get relief

and all the evil thoughts will go. For everything there is a way.rt ?


singlmomat52 profile image

singlmomat52 4 years ago Author

Yes for everything there is a way but some seem not to see that and have no one they feel that they can talk to. But if we treat people kind, say a kind word, a touch of their hand,a big hug, we may never know that we did, just by some small gesture, save their life in that moment. Thank you for your comment. Blessings!!


Kailey 21 months ago

You're the one with the brains here. I'm wacihtng for your posts.


Abhi 21 months ago

This post has helped me think things thruogh

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