A Grandmother I Never Knew

I wish I had met her but I never did. As a child I remember her picture up on the living room wall. Mom never said much about her and for some reason I never really asked. But I wish I had known her. Sometimes I imagine what kind of grandmother she would have been. Mom said she was 8 years old when her mom passed away.

That always made me sad. It made me sad to know that mom had to grow up without her own mom to spoil her like I imagine would have been the case. Without her mom to giver her advice, how did she do it? Life would have been so much better with a mom for a growing girl.

What kind of grandmother would she have been to me? I try to imagine through the only image I have of her. And, although I don't see that picture often, (my mom owns it) the image is still in my head. Was she funny? I don't know.

Was she a serious person? If so, perhaps I get it from her. I can be serious, so I'm told. But, I love to have fun too. What about my grandmother? Did she like to have fun? I only wish I had known her, but I never did. I wonder how smart she was? What kind of house did she live in? Where did she live?

If only I had asked. I need to ask now. I need to know the answers to these questions. My mom just turned 60 years old. I need to ask her all these questions. I need to ask her now. I'm not sure why I need to know. Is there a fear I have? What will it change?

If I did find out all this stuff about her, then what? What would I do with the information? I could share it with cousins at family reunions. I could try to figure out who among our relatives inherited her traits.

Does my mom bake bread because of her mom? I always assumed she baked because of my great-grandmother, my dad's grandmother. How can I long for something I never had? What kind of meals would she have cooked?

What kind of nickname would she have had for me? Would she have spoiled me rotten like my mom has my son spoiled? What would be her view on religion? What about politics?

What significant events did she witness in the past? Did she own and drive a car? I don't know. I feel like these are too many questions to ask my own mother. I don't know if she has many answers and I never want to make her sad over not knowing.

My mom just recently lost a sibling to cancer; one of the sisters that took care of her when her mom passed on. I think this is what reignited my curiosity. Nevertheless, I will begin to find out.

Comments 14 comments

Cardisa profile image

Cardisa 5 years ago from Jamaica

Hi Capncrunch, long time no see. This hub reminds me of a grandfather I never knew. There was no picture but I heard stories. He died before I was born and that left a sort of void for me.

Nice hub!

marcoujor profile image

marcoujor 5 years ago from Jeffersonville PA

Capncrunch~~ I only knew one of my (4) grandparents who died when I was 8yo... fortunately Mom told me many stories and wrote in some journals I gave her of our Family Tree and some traits/ things I can now share with my siblings...

I am so glad you are talking to your Mom about some of this now/ you seem so sensitive that I am sure she will only share what she feels comfortable/ have you considered giving her a journal or a tape recorder for some of her memories~~ you will be so grateful for the insight and the wisdom you gain.

Voted UP & AWESOME~~ thank you!

QudsiaP1 profile image

QudsiaP1 5 years ago

I never got a chance to know any of my grand parents so I know how you feel.

Very well written.

dearabbysmom profile image

dearabbysmom 5 years ago from Indiana

Very thoughtful hub, and from the heart. Totally understandable why you want to know these things. It might not change anything to know, but then again, if you had things in common with her it could give some insight for your own life. It will probably be good for your mom to talk about it, losing her own mom at age 8 had to be awful.

capncrunch profile image

capncrunch 5 years ago from New Orleans Author

Hello Cardisa,

Sorry about taking so long to reply. I was out with an illness. I really appreciate your reading my Hub and commenting. I guess this type of article will remind others of their family members too. Thank you for reading, commenting, and voting up!!

capncrunch profile image

capncrunch 5 years ago from New Orleans Author

Hey marcoujor,

I will take the journal suggestion into consideration. It would be ashame to let more memories slip away. Thank you so much for reading and commenting!!

capncrunch profile image

capncrunch 5 years ago from New Orleans Author

Hello QudsiaP1,

I am sorry you had no opportunity to experience either of your grandparents. They are very special humans and usually have unconditional love. I thank you for reading and commenting!!

capncrunch profile image

capncrunch 5 years ago from New Orleans Author

Hello dearabbysmom,

Thank you for your thoughts on my Hub. I consider my mom a very strong person. Maybe it was by the events she had to endure. Some were pretty bad. And yes, I do wonder about qualities I may have inherited. Your comments are appreciated!!!

ripplemaker profile image

ripplemaker 5 years ago from Cebu, Philippines

Hi cap :) Your hub made me appreciate that I was able to have the blessing of having a wonderful grandma. Although she passed away already, I have beautiful moments with her. And I think if your grandma was with you, she'd love you for sure! :)

capncrunch profile image

capncrunch 5 years ago from New Orleans Author

Hello ripplemaker,

I am delighted that you were able to appreciate having a grandma. I am often drawn to elderly persons and find myself chatting in grocery stores even for a few minutes. Some enjoy the company for a little while as we cross paths. Thank you so much for reading and commenting!!

Darknlovely3436 profile image

Darknlovely3436 5 years ago from NewYork

My Grandmother is no longer with us, but somehow your hubs, made me think of her this moment, thank for sharing

One love

capncrunch profile image

capncrunch 5 years ago from New Orleans Author

Hello Darknlovely3436,

I am greatful that my Hub made up think of your Grandmother! Thank you for reading. Your comment is appreciated.

RTalloni profile image

RTalloni 5 years ago from the short journey

Good for you! By all means, begin to find out!

From an objective standpoint, it would be easy to just close with a blithe comment about the fact that you just never know what you might find out!

However, family is important, and history is important--for a lot of reasons.

capncrunch profile image

capncrunch 5 years ago from New Orleans Author

Hey RTalloni,

I agree. Family is important for many reasons. Too often I have let work get in the way of family and have been making changes in that area. Thanks for reading and commenting!

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