Sean Kinn's "Famous" APO 7-Step Diet
So. You're ready to lose weight, but you're stuck overseas at a U.S. military installation with limited shopping?
Step 1 - Get off work. Drive off base to a local store (your Commissary may have some of these items, but they will usually be cheaper off base). In Germany, for example, look for an Aldi. When you walk in, head straight for the cooler department, then look for the salad section. Buy one green salad with dressing (some come with dressing, some come without), and one tuna, chicken, or egg salad. These prepared salads come in small plastic tubs, or in small sacks; the sacks require you to purchase dressing separately - German salad dressing is phenomenally better than American dressing - everyone knows that.
Step 2 - Go home. Eat your two salads. As soon as you're full, go through your cupboards and throw away any food that is not the two salads. I'm not sure how to word the previous sentence other than: "Go through your cupboards and throw away any food that is not the two salads," so I'll leave it like that. You can leave some cold water and salad dressing in your refrigerator. Although stating this is somewhat tongue in cheek (if you live by yourself, you're good-to-go; if you live with other family members, you may not be able to get away with this).
Step 3 - Go to work the next day. Eat at your base dining facility. Eat cups of fruit, applesauce, or yogurt, and two hard-boiled eggs. Have a cup of coffee or tea, but no sugar - put skim milk in the coffee. If you don't drink coffee or tea - drink mineral water. No SOS (gravy and biscuits). No bacon or eggs. None of those great powdered eggs. Don't drink the fruit cup syrup.
Step 4 - Snack on fruit in between meals at work. This one is the most important step of all, because (because!) fruit is a metabolism-speeder-upper (not a word, I know). Nuts and seeds are OK, too, but not the trail mix variety. They must be real nuts like hazelnuts, pecans, shelled sunflower seeds - like that. You're burning calories while seated at your desk snacking on fruit. It's almost as good as going on a long walk. Apples are good. Grapes are good. Bananas are good, but only eat them half a banana at a time. Oranges are OK. Fruits in general are way more than just vitamins - they are multipliers:
- They speeds up your body's metabolism, which is important if you're slightly aged like me, or if you've gained a few pounds but can't figure out where they're coming from, or are obese (twenty pounds overweight = obese, technically).
- They provide roughage.
- They provide minerals.
- No unhealthy fats.
- No cholesterol.
- And that's the short list (most important aspect of fruit, again, is that while you're sitting there munching on an apple, the apple is speeding up your metabolism; it is literally burning fat off your body - and not from the calorie burn of your jaw movements).
Lean chicken, turkey, and fish are are also metabolism speeder-uppers.
You can see where we're headed for lunch, aye?
Step 5 - Go to lunch at the dining facility again. Grab a bowl and make a salad, but no ham or bacon bits, maybe a few croutons, but mostly cucumbers, leafy stuff, or whatever your favorite vegetable salad stuff is. Ask for a piece of skinless chicken, fish, or turkey from the dude with the cool hat behind the counter. A couple of potatoes or some rice on the plate, too. No roll or cornbread. No desert. Don't stop at your on-base convenience store for a large cappuccino before heading back to work.
Step 6 - Snack on fruit in between meals. You know the drill. Drink lots of cold water throughout your workday.
Step 7 - Get off work. Drive to Aldi. Buy your two salads and a rack of mineral water. Don't eat anything after the salads. Means you'll probably have to go to bed relatively early, otherwise you'll get hungry. That stuff you usually eat at night on the couch while watching the boob tube is the main foodstuff that adds to your poundage.
Sean Kinn's Famous "APO 7-Step Diet," can literally burn one (1) pound a week, which means 52 pounds a year. Realistically, if you mind the details, and pay attention to the discipline portion of the equation - sticking to the diet 21 meals a week - you might be able to lose more than that.
Don't forget: No Twinkies (and don't forget to buy your weekend salads!)
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