ASSERTION vs. AGGRESSION, And The PERKS Being HUMBLE

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Before anything else, I like to greet all my friends at Hub Pages and all my readers a very HAPPY AND BLESSED NEW YEAR! Pardon me for the very tardy greeting, the holiday season was so tremendously busy for me and its aftermath is still so overwhelming to this moment. Now I have to relax and finally give myself a chance to enjoy the very loving ambiance of my second home, where I am free to write and express my thoughts and at the same time indulge in the very refreshing hubs of my favorite hubbers.

I would like to celebrate not only the new year but my life as well through a never ending desire to write hubs which are although imperfectly written, I hope they could somehow inspire or at least be given a moment or two to be pondered on.

I am smiling…

I don’t really know how to begin with this very first hub that I am about to write for this year. For the past few days, I have been bombarded with things that made me ponder more on the significance of HUMILITY, and the difference of ASSERTION and AGGRESSION.

I can still remember what a millionaire friend’s father once told us, “Be humble enough to live a simple life, live within your means, and you will surely have all the chances to be wealthy materially and spiritually…” Those are words that I will always be in my heart and I still thank God to this day for having met my friend and her family.

Humility in the dictionary is likened to being modest, not showy, elaborate or pretentious. It is also associated with being respectful or the ability to show appropriate deference. As kids were always told that one of the most vital virtues that any person should possess is being humble.

…on ASSERTING ONE’S SELF, yet REMAINING HUMBLE…

In this world that we live in, being assertive is also a must. Assertion is the ability to act confidently and being forceful or noticeable. Most of the time, we mistake its meaning with being arrogant, so that for most, one can never be humble and at the same time be assertive.

Let us keep in mind that having the ability to assert one’s self is not really a manifestation of being arrogant. Assertion is being forceful enough so as to communicate a fact or a reality without being contemptuous and with much regard and reverence for others. Arrogance on the other hand is manifested by showing self- importance, with contempt and disregard for others. And these acts can be defined in one word which is AGGRESSION.

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ASSERTION vs. AGGRESSION

Assertive people can state a fact without humiliating others and without being proud. Arrogant people always try their very best to show the world how important or even “intelligent” they are so that most of the time, they tell lies to “lift” their image. They are hostile whenever they need to prove something even if it’s a lie and they attack others even without provocation.

Humility therefore can always be present with assertive people who are smart enough to know when to be loud and knows so well when to keep their mouth shut. They know how to choose their words to explain and prove a fact without being hostile.

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Why should we remain HUMBLE?

It may be so elementary for some but here are a few most forgotten reasons why being humble is always a very good weapon as we face our life’s battles:

  • Humility keeps us human. It never fails to remind us that nothing, not even much intelligence and wealth can keep us from needing others, and most of all the Almighty as we face each day.
  • It gives us bigger chances to win real friends. Being humble is not being pretentious, so we don’t act like someone we are not nor do we have to manipulate what is true just to be loved and accepted because we are humble enough to admit our foibles although we celebrate our strengths. The best gift that we can give to ourselves and to others is being true and having the humility to accept what is real.
  • It gives us the chance to learn things as much as we want to. I once read a book which says, “If you don’t know something, be smart, and learn to ASK.” Being humble enough to admit that one does not know something and having the humility to ask is an advantage.
  • Having the humility to know that we do not know everything no matter how intelligent we are gives us bigger chances to discover things.
  • It makes us a happier person because we are not stressed to cope with our own arrogance.
  • It gives us the chance to be noticed and be truly respected without trying hard. Most of the admired and respect worthy people are the ones who have so many things to be proud of but they manage to keep their feet on the ground. They know so well how to get along well with other people of all kinds even to the most ignorant. These are the people that we give our utmost respect because we look up on them, which is far more different than the civility we give to arrogant people not because we respect them, but because we are human.

… keeping HUMILITY in our being…

These are just few reasons to be humble. It keeps one’s life truly meaningful. To stay humble, let us keep these few things in mind:

  • Life is uncertain, what we have today may be gone tomorrow, what we wish for may come today yet everything is as fleeting as a smoke. As they always say, “Life is like a wheel…”, so never fail to keep in mind where you came from and have the humility to accept that you will never know what comes next.
  • We are just this world's visitors. We don't own anything. EVERYTHING is borrowed from the ONE who loved us even before our time. We may own the world, yet we can never bring anything in our grave. So, as we take our life's journey, let us try to give our very best to keep vital virtues to make our journey more meaningful and leave beautiful footprints in the hearts of people who are part of our life.

Humility is a virtue that give so much value to a person who truly possess it and knows the art of keeping it glued in his whole being even in times when he has to assert himself. Above all, it gives him so much room to fly as high as he wish, yet it gives him the security and serenity to know that he will have so many loving and caring hands to catch him in whatever time that he may fall.

I am still smiling because I look forward to more than just a truly happy new year ahead of us… have a BLESSED AND HUMBLE LIFE for 2011 and the years to come my friends! Thanks so much for spending time with me at my page. Wishing us all the best that life may bring. Cheers, with love and peace always!

Copyright of DjBryle, 2011 (ALL RIGHTS RESERVED AND AUTHORIZED BY LAW)

Images courtesy of Simon Howden and Idea Go at Freedigitalphotos.com

"...for the PROUD shall be HUMBLED, and the HUMBLE SHALL BE HONORED" (Luke 18:14)

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Comments 29 comments

Mentalist acer profile image

Mentalist acer 5 years ago from A Voice in your Mind!

In my humble opinion,this is a well thought out and meaningful hub,DjBryle...though I might add to the thin line of assertion and interuption.Asking a question with you intention included within is a diplomatic devience.;)


The Pink Panther profile image

The Pink Panther 5 years ago from Sydney, Australia

Great hub!


VioletSun profile image

VioletSun 5 years ago from Oregon/ Name: Marie

Very well written, inpiring, uplifting hub! I so agree, that we are only visitors in this planet, so as guests is best to acquire virtues that allow for a pleasant stay.

Your description on assertiveness is right on. Lots of folks think aggresiveness makes them powerful, actually expressing one's mind firmly without putting another down is an expression of spiritual and emotional maturity, this is where the true power is.

Loved your comments on humility as well.

Happy, Humble Year to you and everyone! :)

Voted up!


DjBryle profile image

DjBryle 5 years ago from Somewhere in the LINES of your MIND, and HOPEFULLY at the RIPPLES of your HEART. =) Author

Mentalist Acre, and Violet Sun- Thanks so much for the kind words and for always giving me blessings by adding more substance to my hub! Cheers and God bless! See you around!

Pink Panther- Thanks so much, Wishing you a blessed new year! See you around!


Lita C. Malicdem profile image

Lita C. Malicdem 5 years ago from Philippines

Humility is the birthmark of someone who is a product of his own good family breeding. We don't buy it, we are born into it. We can't fake ourselves to be humble. It flows like water from within us- touching others, influencing others to be good as well.

This is well-written. Maintain your humility and be blessed all life through. Thanks for sharing this.


Pearldiver profile image

Pearldiver 5 years ago from Tomorrow - In Words & NZ Time.

Nice work and well written Dj. I found this is an interesting hub as I think many people actually don't take the time to consider whether or not someone is arrogant or assertive, as they often too busy trying to promote themselves, often as you have mentioned, with a lie or other irrelevancy. I am a very confident writer and person in real life and just hate having to put up with fools that consider themselves to better, so I come across as arrogant in the forums whenever those ones pop up. However, you will never find anything above humble in any of my writing or poetry... that is from the heart... as I suspect your writing is also.

Thanks for sharing your talent.. as I said, you can tell a lot from one's writing over that of which is said in a forum to an idiot - (which sadly we occasionally get swamped with on the net!).

You Take Care and Good Luck with your 2011 goals!


From YESTERDAY 5 years ago

Hi,Jen! I am so happy to meet a truly respect worthy yet remains glued to the ground like you. I love your blogs and I admire you so much.


DjBryle profile image

DjBryle 5 years ago from Somewhere in the LINES of your MIND, and HOPEFULLY at the RIPPLES of your HEART. =) Author

Mam Lita- Thanks so much for adding more substance to my hub once again. As always, you never fail to inspire me to write what's in my heart and you are one of the people who make HP a better place for wannabe writer like me. May you be blessed always! See you around. =)

Pearldiver- I agree with you, there are times when we can be arrogant due to some provocations by more aggressive people, and that is so natural because we are but humans to be provoked. Thanks for dropping by and for adding more substance to my hub too! It is an honor to have you here, my friend! =)


DjBryle profile image

DjBryle 5 years ago from Somewhere in the LINES of your MIND, and HOPEFULLY at the RIPPLES of your HEART. =) Author

Yesterday- Hey! Have we personally met? Thanks for dropping by and for the warm, comment. Wishing you the best for 2011 and for the years to come!


Micky Dee profile image

Micky Dee 5 years ago

Absolutely DjBryle. Thank you for a great reminder to be humble. God bless you and your family!


DjBryle profile image

DjBryle 5 years ago from Somewhere in the LINES of your MIND, and HOPEFULLY at the RIPPLES of your HEART. =) Author

Hey, Micky! I am so happy to see you here! Thanks too for the kind words and for dropping by. God bless you more!


Steph Harris profile image

Steph Harris 5 years ago from Cambridgeshire, United Kingdom

Wonderful, you have written a truly beautiful, inspiring hub that can do nothing but bring out the best in everyone who reads it. Thank you.


DjBryle profile image

DjBryle 5 years ago from Somewhere in the LINES of your MIND, and HOPEFULLY at the RIPPLES of your HEART. =) Author

Thanks Steph, you brought up my best mood today! God bless! =)


katiem2 profile image

katiem2 5 years ago from I'm outta here

Amen, I agree and very sage advice for all of us to enjoy a better quality of life! :) Katie


dablufox profile image

dablufox 5 years ago from Australia

An inspiring hub, I'm afraid I'm have been often guilty of arrogance but for most people the battle inside us to keep our ego's under control never ends. Humility and assertiveness are not easy to define but you have done an excellent job.

I think assertiveness is being confident in your own self value without being obsessed with it or feeling the need to prove your worth but at the same time possessing the courage to defend yourself when attacked, ridiculed or mistreated.

There is a fine line I think between being assertive and being arrogant and your hub has made the differences a little clearer through your wonderful insight, thank you.


DjBryle profile image

DjBryle 5 years ago from Somewhere in the LINES of your MIND, and HOPEFULLY at the RIPPLES of your HEART. =) Author

Katie- Hey! I am so happy to see you at my page again! Thanks for another kind words, you never fail to inspire me, my friend! God bless! =)


DjBryle profile image

DjBryle 5 years ago from Somewhere in the LINES of your MIND, and HOPEFULLY at the RIPPLES of your HEART. =) Author

Dablufox- Thanks for adding more great substance to my hub, my friend! I am honored to know that you spent time for my hub, and leaving me some thoughtful comments. Thank you more! See you around! =)


From YESTERDAY 5 years ago

If I tell you that I once told you that I always wish you were really my daughter, would you remember me? hahaha! I hope. You will always be my "bunso". God bless you and your family too. We enjoy reading your blogs.


DjBryle profile image

DjBryle 5 years ago from Somewhere in the LINES of your MIND, and HOPEFULLY at the RIPPLES of your HEART. =) Author

Yesterday- lol! Salamat po! God bless you more! =)


prasetio30 profile image

prasetio30 5 years ago from malang-indonesia

Very inspiring hub. I try to be humble and I thought we want it too. But it depend on us. I hope we always do the right things...amen. God bless you!

Love and peace,


DjBryle profile image

DjBryle 5 years ago from Somewhere in the LINES of your MIND, and HOPEFULLY at the RIPPLES of your HEART. =) Author

Prasetio- Thanks for adding more substance to my hub! Take care, my friend! =)


James A Watkins profile image

James A Watkins 5 years ago from Chicago

This Hub is simply wonderful. You got your lovely message across with eloquence. Thank you for the good read. Where I come from, they call me Mr. Humble. :D


DjBryle profile image

DjBryle 5 years ago from Somewhere in the LINES of your MIND, and HOPEFULLY at the RIPPLES of your HEART. =) Author

James- Hey, I know so well that you are one of those people who deserve such reverence, my friend. You are one of the best hubbers at HP and yet you give time to read hubs from wannabe hubbers like me. =) You are a blessing to know! Thank you more for being around!


Joshua526 5 years ago

A really great hub! A must read, well thought and very thought provoking!


Aley Martin profile image

Aley Martin 5 years ago from Sumner, Washington,USA

I love this Hub! I remember not knowing the difference in my younger days and thinking that being assertive meant being aggressive and demanding. When we realize the difference, there is a strange calm that can surround us and we can then say and do those things we before could only imagine doing...thanks great Hub!


kimh039 profile image

kimh039 5 years ago

Up and beautiful. Thanks DjBryle. This was a good explanation of humility and arrogance. I loved the pics and the video, too.


DjBryle profile image

DjBryle 5 years ago from Somewhere in the LINES of your MIND, and HOPEFULLY at the RIPPLES of your HEART. =) Author

Joshua526,

Thanks so much for leaving your kind words! Happy hubbing!


DjBryle profile image

DjBryle 5 years ago from Somewhere in the LINES of your MIND, and HOPEFULLY at the RIPPLES of your HEART. =) Author

Aley,

Hey! Thanks so much for adding more substance and meaning to my hub. I am so honored to have you at my page! See you around!


DjBryle profile image

DjBryle 5 years ago from Somewhere in the LINES of your MIND, and HOPEFULLY at the RIPPLES of your HEART. =) Author

kimho39,

Thanks for your kind words, my friend! I am so glad to know that you liked this hub and the video too. Happy hubbing! =)

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