Admitting an Eating Addiction
A compulsion is something that you do even if it hurts and is harmful
In this video Dr. Neal Barnard MD explains why certain foods are physically addictive, and people who are addicted to food turn to these foods over any other
A few days ago, I decided to do something for myself. I decided to admit that I have an addiction to food.
My addiction goes further than just liking food. I also compulsively eat large amounts of it.
A compulsion is something that you do even if it causes you physical harm. Most drug abusers could be considered compulsive.
The Reasons I Overeat
Stress is probably the biggest reason that I overeat. I find comfort in having good-tasting food in my mouth, and in feeling full in my gut.
When I am angry, or agitated I often find myself in the kitchen looking for something chocolate or noodley. I could literally live on chocolate and Ramen Noodles.
I use food to put myself to sleep when nothing else works. A friend of mine said this was the weirdest thing she had ever heard, but it's true. If I ingest enough carbs, it's better than the best sleeping pill for putting myself to sleep. I am fully aware of why this works, and exactly how unhealthy it is, yet I do it because it is effective. Again, I am a compulsive eater, and I do it even though it is hurting me.
Lack of Time
Because of my trouble sleeping, I have trouble staying on a decent schedule. I am also self-employed, so when I have slept in, the first thing I want to do is work. Sometimes hours go by before I eat, and then I am famished, and ready to eat half of the kitchen.
I also eat out a lot, because I don't feel that there is enough time in the day to cook. This of course has led to a lot of unhealthy eating habits coupled with overeating due to the enormous portions that are now the norm in our restaurants.
What am I Going to Do About It?
What Doesn't Work
Around 7 years ago, I lost 124 pounds, but I didn't keep it off. I think this was because I put all of my effort into losing weight, without really addressing my addiction to food first.
After about a year of intense exercise and dieting, my weightloss hit a plateu, and I began to lose all motivation. I think it was a pan of breadsticks that broke my diet, and since my body was not used to the intense drop in calories I had achieved, it held on to every calorie in the half a pan of bread sticks I ate, and in one night I gained 10 pounds. I was devistated by the ease of gaining weight in comparison to the back-breaking work it took to lose it, and I gave up completely. Maybe I should have been more focused on the fact that I had beaten my addiction to food for over a year instead of being so focused on the weight loss that came with doing so.
Knowing is half the battle, right? I think the other half of the battle is knowing exactly what you are facing, and planning your attack accordingly.
What I am facing is an addiction to food, and a compulsive habit of eating too much.
Now that I know and accept this, I can begin to wage war against my enemy. I have started a blog in order to offer myself accountability, and I have completely outlined my battle plan, starting with giving myself some structure, since this seems to be what causes me the most stress, and opportunity to overeat. I am scheduling myself time to work on every aspect of my life.
I started this blog about a week ago, and since then I can already see an improvement in the amount of food that I eat.
I really do feel that knowing is half the battle.
I know that I am addicted to food, and I know that I am strong enough to quit overeating.
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