Am I Addicted To Alcohol
Are you an occasional drinker? Do you drink only at celebrations or parties? Do you drink everyday? Am I addicted to alcohol?
These questions are just some of the question I started to ask myself when I saw that I was slipping away from society and heading to rock bottom, a little at time.
All of the answers to the above were all Yes, and certainly the last question "Am I Addicted".was a BIG YES. When I had finally admitted that I had a true and real problem is when I had to stop and think of how I was going to get out of this addiction I was in without having any bad side effects.
The withdraw from my addiction was one of the reasons I really didn't quit drinking alcohol years before. I was afraid of what might happen after I stopped drinking alcohol. I had heard of so many people and how the suffered with withdraw that it worried me that it might happen to me.
As I hesitated to quit, because of worry, it led me deeper into my addiction. It was only hurting me to keep putting off what I truly wanted to due, and that was to change my life and become clean and sober again.
I would watch all the shows on A&E like Intervention and Addicted. They are excellent shows and I faithfully made sure I watched them to see how this process of recovery takes place. The problem that I had was that so many of them after leaving Rehab. relapsed shortly after returning to society.
So, I thought to myself, man this must be some brutal stuff I'm dealing with here. "How in the world am I going to do this and not relapse?" By watching these things unfold in front of me I became more hesitant to start down my road to recovery.
I began to think and say "these people are them, and I am Me". Just because they are having a problem getting out of their addiction has nothing to due with me at all. That is when I had a little hope that I could beat this addiction, and never mind what's happening to the world around me.
I wanted to be sober and I needed to get sober before it became to late. I was losing my family and friends, slow but sure, and I knew that I would lose my life also in time all due to my addiction. So, I started to make up a plan on how and when I was going to start preparing for my sobriety in a safe and clean manner.
I first picked a start date and tried to get my mind into a Positive mode instead of a Negative mode in which my life ran on. "Negativity". I always felt this way because I think that the alcohol would just bring me down to that negative part in my life. I really didn't have anything Positive in my life and the alcohol just made it worse.
I thought to myself, that I have been drinking for so long, and I thought it might be too late to make a change now. The damage has been done and maybe it is to late. This is what I thought, and just another reason that I hesitated on changing my life. i FOUND OUT IT'S NEVER TO LATE TO MAKE A CHANGE IN YOUR LIFE.
I said, I must Think Positive and tell myself that I CAN ACHIEVE this goal in my life and I will conquer the demons that have ruined my life for so many years.
I wanted to live the life I had before my addiction took over me. I love life, and I wanted the best for myself and my loving family that has been putting up with me for all these years. No one deserves to suffer in a family because one person is addicted drugs or alcohol.
What I have learned is that anything is possible in life if you truly want it bad enough. I did a lot of praying and asked God to help me overcome this addiction I had and give me my life back the way it was intended to be, by God.
Everything worked out just as I hoped it would. I'm Sober and finally surrendered to the demons that had control of my body and mind. I thank God for giving me the willpower, strength, and pour determination to achieve my Sobriety back with no sickness, accept for the first month or so, my demons continued begging me for the fuel for them to survive and trying to destroy me even more, as they had done to me in the past.
I put up the biggest fight of my life, and I WON, beating my alcohol demons that will never return into my life again. When you will a fight like that, it is something to truly be proud of and I am very proud of myself and what I have accomplished.
If you think you have an addiction of any sort and really want to change your life, just make your mind up, commit yourself to the change, Think Positive and Pray to our God for his help and your will succeed.
BELIEVE AND YOU WILL ACHIEVE!
© 2010 Mark Bruno
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