An Alcoholic In The Mirror
Have you ever just stopped and looked into a mirror? What did you see? Did you see a beautiful and loving person or an alcoholic in the mirror?
All through my earlier years I was always a vane person, had to look good and look healthy. I would look into the mirror and just say to myself just how fortunate I was to be healthy, happy and loved by the best parents in the world.
There came a time in my life when I was introduced to the filthy habit of alcohol abuse and continued to abuse it for many many years. Little did I know that my world would soon fall to pieces in the upcoming years due to my alcohol addiction.
I would look in the mirror in the morning as we all do, getting ready to start my day. Each and every week that went by I noticed small changes in my appearance, my looks and my weight. Me, being so vane and always wanting to look as good as I could, did not want to admit to myself that I was changing in my appearance and also my outlook in life.
I saw this, but didn't want to make a change in my life and quit drinking alcohol. As much as I wanted to, I just could not, the addiction got the best of me. We have all heard the old saying "that pictures and mirrors never lie". As much as I looked into that mirror and saw my world changing before my very eyes,it still wasn't enough to make me quit drinking.
I knew I needed help but was embarrassed to ask due to trying to hide my addiction from others. I wasn't hiding anything, my changing appearance was telling the true picture to many of the people that knew me well.
They would say just joking around, so I thought, "man .... putting a little weight on there Mark aren't you?" Statements such as that made me really feel like crap and I STILL didn't want to change my life around.
With small hints like that from my friends, co-workers and even my own family I started to be really self conscience of what they were saying to me and how seeing how I was changing. That made me really start to think that I was truly destroying myself and ruining the great family life I once had all for the bottle. I started to put my addiction in front of everything in my life.
I would look in the mirror and say "who are you standing there"? You don't look like the person I used to know. When I finally got so sick and tired of what I was seeing in that mirror I then decided to try and change my life for the good and start to feel good about myself again. I am now going to devote my life to my family and my sobriety. Never to have a negative thought again and to keep a Positive Attitude from now on in my life.
I had to make that number one on my list, to admit I had an alcohol addiction, and in order to change my life I would have to surrender to my demons and say good-bye forever. And so I did and have been sober seen then and there is nothing like a clean and sober life, take it from me.
I love my sobriety and love myself again and the new life I now have.
© 2010 Mark Bruno
More by this Author
Here is feeling lost and empty after an alcoholic stops drinking alcohol and my story and thoughts on just how I got through the torture. I call this torture because alcohol was my life, my best friend, and something I...
Everyone one in the world has had or has problems in their life. Many choose to correct the problems in the best way they can and figure those problems out in a sober way.
Back in 1987 I overheard my present boss talking to the Diocese regarding him leaving his position as Supervisor of Maintenance in a Catholic High School, to taking on a position as Manager of a 32 acre cemetery is...