An Alcoholic In The Mirror
Have you ever just stopped and looked into a mirror? What did you see? Did you see a beautiful and loving person or an alcoholic in the mirror?
All through my earlier years I was always a vane person, had to look good and look healthy. I would look into the mirror and just say to myself just how fortunate I was to be healthy, happy and loved by the best parents in the world.
There came a time in my life when I was introduced to the filthy habit of alcohol abuse and continued to abuse it for many many years. Little did I know that my world would soon fall to pieces in the upcoming years due to my alcohol addiction.
I would look in the mirror in the morning as we all do, getting ready to start my day. Each and every week that went by I noticed small changes in my appearance, my looks and my weight. Me, being so vane and always wanting to look as good as I could, did not want to admit to myself that I was changing in my appearance and also my outlook in life.
I saw this, but didn't want to make a change in my life and quit drinking alcohol. As much as I wanted to, I just could not, the addiction got the best of me. We have all heard the old saying "that pictures and mirrors never lie". As much as I looked into that mirror and saw my world changing before my very eyes,it still wasn't enough to make me quit drinking.
I knew I needed help but was embarrassed to ask due to trying to hide my addiction from others. I wasn't hiding anything, my changing appearance was telling the true picture to many of the people that knew me well.
They would say just joking around, so I thought, "man .... putting a little weight on there Mark aren't you?" Statements such as that made me really feel like crap and I STILL didn't want to change my life around.
With small hints like that from my friends, co-workers and even my own family I started to be really self conscience of what they were saying to me and how seeing how I was changing. That made me really start to think that I was truly destroying myself and ruining the great family life I once had all for the bottle. I started to put my addiction in front of everything in my life.
I would look in the mirror and say "who are you standing there"? You don't look like the person I used to know. When I finally got so sick and tired of what I was seeing in that mirror I then decided to try and change my life for the good and start to feel good about myself again. I am now going to devote my life to my family and my sobriety. Never to have a negative thought again and to keep a Positive Attitude from now on in my life.
I had to make that number one on my list, to admit I had an alcohol addiction, and in order to change my life I would have to surrender to my demons and say good-bye forever. And so I did and have been sober seen then and there is nothing like a clean and sober life, take it from me.
I love my sobriety and love myself again and the new life I now have.
© 2010 Mark Bruno
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