Your Own SPA at Home. Pamper Yourself.

Ahhhhh.....mmmmm....warm soothing bubbles.
Ahhhhh.....mmmmm....warm soothing bubbles.
Massage tender muscles
Massage tender muscles

Coping with the heaviness


It happens to every one at some point or another. Sadness, a heaviness within that can zap our strength and steal our joy. Keenly aware of this mood, we may understand how it grabbed hold of us. Yet sadly, some of us are not quite sure how we came to feel so listless. We simply know we don't like it. In a moment of self-protectiveness we also know it's up to us to try to get through this valley.


Please resist the urge to dig deeply into self-analysis. Save your strength to pull yourself up and out. Once out from under the cloud, you'll have a better view and a more positive outlook.. For the moment it's that image in the mirror, that tired & pale reflection you can no longer disguise that requires attention. Look yourself in the eyes and resolve to help yourself.


You are a caring and compassionate individual. You've been self-less with your time and efforts in support of friends and family. You are there for them at a moment's notice. I believe it is time to befriend yourself.

You know how to do this. Your creative mind is filled with means of giving comfort. As a parent, friend and lover, you know all about TLC. At this moment take your own advice and take yourself by the hand.


You've stood before the mirror and have seen that sad, tired face. You think aloud, " I don't feel my usual, happy self and not much seems to make me smile. Besides all this, I hurt all over"

Time to put a plan together. Yes, it's time to pull yourself up and out of a nasty funk. No need to spend another minute feeling down and out.

An easy method for immediate relief: Relax and follow the steps.

On a comfortable surface..(blanket on the floor?) stretch your entire body like a baby with arms and legs, outstretched. Breathe slowly and deeply, holding briefly on IN and relaxing on OUT. After just a few breaths, this activity has a natural tendency to spread a calming sensation throughout your body. Tensions begin to ease-up and muscles begin to release their grip

You're in your familiar your own private SPA. Give yourself a Two-Hundred- dollar-session of attention, complete with all the pampering..


Create a serene atmosphere and ambiance of sensuality. Lavender scented candles emit a soothing fragrance, while the sweet strings of violins fill the atmosphere with gentle sound.

Slip into a warm bath sprinkled with mineral salts or bubbles,or both! Allow the gentle ripples to engulf every taut nerve and tendon. Kick back and enjoy feeling weightless, as you rest your eyes, again breathing deeply and slowly.

Imagine your favorite fantasy......bring to mind a comforting memory. Block negative emotions from invading your private space. Lay silently, floating freely, no cares, no worries....just tranquility Easy listening, caressing waters, gentle thoughts......effortless breathing.....all things hypnotic give rise to an all-consuming calmness.

Tenseness and tightness soon begin to disappear. You will feel free and light and eager to indulge yourself further. Move slowly, gracefully....there's no one there but you....alone and free to love yourself uninhibited. Choose your favorite soothing oils and lotions to prepare to massage and knead the muscles of your body from head to toe. Take pleasure in the tightness slowly melting away.

Retire to a quiet place and lay back in silence and relaxation. Invite the lightness & luxury of the moment to embrace you......soothe you gently as if you are floating, weightless.

Feeding your body the pleasures of comfort it deserves, is a sensual gift we may give ourselves. In this moment of self love and care, you're ecstatically aware of your own worth.

With your body relaxed, you feel any mental stress or heaviness free itself from your being. You've released all tensions. Focus on beautiful thoughts, positive affirmations, as you shut out ugly thoughts that may disturb you.


In keeping with a theme of pure serenity, maintain your focus on joy of what pleases your senses. Embrace every second of a tranquility that created this sense of well-being.

You've given yourself a luxurious gift of pampering....a perfect gift to appreciate in private, yet familiar surrounding. This offering of kindness will manifest itself in more wonderful ways than you may have expected.

Your body will feel regenerated but relaxed. Your mind will have settled down beside a comfortable & peaceful place. No longer are you sad or tense, but pleased and calm.

Your Spirit will have perked up and taken notice of all the personal attention and caring. . Sleep will come and your dreams will be pleasant.

When morning arrives, you can greet the sun with a smile and a promise. A promise to be as kind and caring to yourself as you always are to others, for you are valuable as well.

We learn more each day. We discover how necessary it is to take care of ourselves. We must fend off the world and it's monsters that would rob us of our happiness.

Always remember to take care of you. For when you do, you become a better, fuller being, capable of patience and understanding for those you love. You may give of yourself with passion and abandon.

You are valued and worthy of love. Love yourself......allow others to love you more.

Tips for daily care

Once you have taken the time and care to pamper yourself with a luxurious spa treatment, you can easily maintain the sensation of a relaxed mind & body. Taking ten to fifteen minutes of your day to put aside the stressful activities of daily living and simply focus on yourself.

You'll find it amazing that a few stretches and some slow deep and steady breathing will quickly erase any tension in your neck and shoulders. Choose to give yourself a refreshing 10 minute facial or if you prefer, a warm foot bath with mineral salts. Both of these simple regimens are guaranteed to perk up and renew your entire attitude. Just before returning to your work, jot down what you've accomplished the first half of your day and create your goals for the remainder of the day.

Keep in mind, you can decide to use this 15 minute break in any way you choose. Quite often it's a great idea to use that time for simple stillness. Make yourself a cup of herbal tea and find a peaceful setting outdoors, put your feet up & soak in the pleasures of nature.

You'll be treating your senses to the hypnotic sounds of leaves rustling in the breeze as your eyes take in the vibrant colors of nature and freshness of the air fills your lungs. These are the simple moments that create lasting rewards. Make this a habit as often as possible and I promise you will thank yourself.

Luxury Bath Treatment at home.

Sweet Dreams
Sweet Dreams

Is it needless to mention?

I would hope that it stands to reason that what I'm suggesting here, is sound advise for the occasional slump or short-term listlessness.. A profound sense of worthlessness that seems to consume your entire being, for days on end, without a ray of hope, requires immediate professional/medical intervention. There should be no doubt or hesitation of the importance of attention to a serious issue, for yourself or on someone's behalf. Consult a Mental Health Professional.

Soothing sound of Serenity....."Yanni"

More by this Author

Comments 33 comments

Sunshine625 profile image

Sunshine625 2 years ago from Orlando, FL

We both deserve it! xo

fpherj48 profile image

fpherj48 2 years ago from Beautiful Upstate New York Author

Treat Yourself with love & kindness. You deserve it!

Sunshine625 profile image

Sunshine625 2 years ago from Orlando, FL

I'm ready for some sweet slumber and a weekend at the SPA! :)

fpherj48 profile image

fpherj48 2 years ago from Beautiful Upstate New York Author

Thank you for such a thoughtful comment based on personal knowledge & experience ! Peace, Paula

GiftsByDiana profile image

GiftsByDiana 2 years ago from Hubbard, Ohio, USA

I've fought this all of my life. It ran through my Dad's family like it was chasing us - and it was.

It is one of the reasons that I became an organic gardener and started to make my own herbal teas and pampering stuff.

Knowing that it is within you is half of the battle.

Training yourself to notice when it is about to strike again and then knowing what works for you is the other half.

fpherj48 profile image

fpherj48 4 years ago from Beautiful Upstate New York Author

Thank you so much for stopping by!! I appreciate your visit!

poojasd7 profile image

poojasd7 4 years ago from India

Here I am reading your hub on beating the blues!

Nicely put and great remedies! :-)

fpherj48 profile image

fpherj48 4 years ago from Beautiful Upstate New York Author

iamaudra.....I'm glad you found this helpful. I think we can always be nicer to ourselves than we usually are....because we have a tendency to be hard on ourselves....but nice to everyone else! Know what I mean?

Thanks for stopping by.

profile image

iamaudraleigh 4 years ago

Paula, You have alot of valid points than can be helpful to your readers. Your hub can help me too! Thank you for writing this!

fpherj48 profile image

fpherj48 5 years ago from Beautiful Upstate New York Author

poeticmentor....Do not despair! I promise you, one day, in a "light-bulb" moment, that little character within us, aka, "self-protector," will get your undivided attention and help you to realize that YOU are worthy of love, comfort and assistance...and what's more, you can do it for yourself!!

editorsupremo....How wonderful that you have such a relaxing and comforting talent! Piano music is so soothing. I have beautiful piano music C.D.'s and use them for this very purpose! Thank you for your valuable input.

editorsupremo profile image

editorsupremo 5 years ago from London, England

Another brilliant hub! Depression is an awful illness which can eat away at your soul especially when you are down on yourself. Sometimes we can tear ourselves apart more and worse than any other person can. Try to find something that might lift your mood when you find yourself in the realms of despair and dark places. I play the piano when I get low.

poeticmentor profile image

poeticmentor 5 years ago from New York City

This is wonderful. I have to be consistent with these practices. I never say NO. and I always feel obligated to others. When I treat myself I feel a bit guilty sometimes. Great hub.

fpherj48 profile image

fpherj48 5 years ago from Beautiful Upstate New York Author

mikeq107...Welcome to my hub. S.A.D is very real, as you discovered. I'm glad that you were able to find the answer for your issue. I'm sure it has made all the difference in your frame of mind. Move to Maui? What an absolutely splendid idea! It's a paradise. Peace!!

profile image

mikeq107 5 years ago

Great know for years I thought I was depressed and yes we all have those days...but then I found out after a trip to Maui that I had S.A.D...Basicily lack of Sunshine ..natural Vit..D...I live In Portland Oregon and I grew up In Sun there LOL...So During the long grey winter and sadly most of summer in Oregon I use a Happy Light/ blue light to write with and carry it with me...well the Best part is..we have decided to Move to Maui..I loved the person I became in natural sunlight..My Wife did too...Anyway Have a great week!!!pleased to meet you ...

Mike :0)

fpherj48 profile image

fpherj48 5 years ago from Beautiful Upstate New York Author

Cogerson....what a GUY! I'll never disqualify YOU again! lol

Victoria Lynn...Been there my friend...Very familiar with all 11 letters of "overwhelmed." MOST unpleasant and only WE can figure our way out! I encourage you to "ditch" whatever you order to "re-adjust" to MUCH less stress and more peace & enjoyment.

Victoria Lynn profile image

Victoria Lynn 5 years ago from Arkansas, USA

fpherj--I struggle nearly daily, but much of it is my stress at work right now, and being so busy outside work that I'm overwhelmed. I need to ditch my full-time job to have time to do what I need to do! Thanks for the hub. Nice reminder....

Cogerson profile image

Cogerson 5 years ago from Virginia

An interesting hub that I had not read for your HubPage resume. Thanks for the suggestions that will help beat the blues and the blahs. Voted up and useful.....PS I enjoyed reading your tribute hub from lord de cross....and yes I have decided to let bygones be

fpherj48 profile image

fpherj48 5 years ago from Beautiful Upstate New York Author

Hello again Martie, my friend....good to hear from you! Music and dancing....YES! Just recently had a chat w/ a friend of mine who battles depression as well as bi-polar disorder....she took up "ZUMBA" dance-exercize to Salsa music! She's hooked, says she hasn't felt this "good all over," in years! Even lost 20 pounds in 8 weeks. I say GREAT!...keep dancing! It IS difficult to pull out of that damned bottomless pit, Martie....sadly, I've been down there. It's dark, lonely and frightening. I found that eventually I become so extremely ANGRY, I scream out "Sancho! My Armor, My Sword!!!" and like Don Quixote, the Man of La Mancha, I fake my way into battle, using any means of fantasy until it becomes my reality. We all have our takes some time in practise. YOU have the power within to "follow that star, no matter how hopeless, no matter how dream the impossible dream......."

MartieCoetser profile image

MartieCoetser 5 years ago from South Africa

Excellent advice: “Resist the urge to tear yourself apart or dig deeply into an attempt at self-analysis. Save your strength and focus on pulling yourself up and out.”

I find music (and dancing) an instant mood changer - cheerful music gets me in a mood to dance… the physical activity stimulates the brain to release serotonine – the body’s natural anti-depressant.

But it takes willpower to do this, because I rather FEEL like drowning in my own sadness. Fortunately I know – had the experience – I don’t sink slowly, but fall like a rock into a bottomless pit of depression – not easy, almost impossible, to get out again.

So rather kill the sadness without delay.

fpherj48, I am boots and all on your page about beating the blues.

zzron profile image

zzron 5 years ago from Houston, TX.

Thank you fpherj48, you are very kind and I appreciate that.

fpherj48 profile image

fpherj48 5 years ago from Beautiful Upstate New York Author

And Peace & happiness to you as well, zzron. Now, during these very difficult times in our fractured country, it is ever-more vital to be self-motivated and open our hearts and minds to our suffering fellow man. You have a very positive attitude and compassionate nature, my friend...The world needs more like you.

zzron profile image

zzron 5 years ago from Houston, TX.

Very motivational and up lifting. This seems to be a popular topic with some of my hubs as well. I do like to learn as much as I can about positive thinking being self-motivated and helping others to overcome depression and the stresses of life. Peace and happiness to you, Happy Thanksgiving!

fpherj48 profile image

fpherj48 5 years ago from Beautiful Upstate New York Author

Oh Sharon...the ever constant lament of nurturing females. What IS our problem anyway, girlfriend?? It's rather crazy that we have to WORK at being generous with ourselves...but alas...tis true! Oh, I don't think the Kardashians have this same you?? LOL!

Sharyn's Slant profile image

Sharyn's Slant 5 years ago from Northeast Ohio USA

Hi Paula,

Great advice ~ now if I can only take it to heart for myself :) I am just too darn good at given it and not taking it. Hmmmm, hope all is well with you!


profile image

Arlene V. Poma 5 years ago


fpherj48 profile image

fpherj48 5 years ago from Beautiful Upstate New York Author

Nancy's a pussy cat...and also a Total Feminist. You would like her.

profile image

Arlene V. Poma 5 years ago

One??? You are only giving me ONE to CHOOSE FROM??? Okay. Voted up, useful, interesting, beautiful and AWESOME. I just had my breakfast smoothie, and I am quite passive right now. Thank you for the free advice, Paula. You are so right on. Thank you! By the way--I don't watch Nancy Grace. She looks mean.

fpherj48 profile image

fpherj48 5 years ago from Beautiful Upstate New York Author

Arlene...tsk tsk. I seem to recall you requesting some online "counseling". Ok, dear, you got it! Here goes.

Sure, Arlene it COULD be any number of things that give you the BLAHS...but to this trained Pro, sounds a bit like self-inflicted resentment. Easy now, take a deep breath...let down the defenses. Are you referring to the man you love when you say, "Blob?" So, he's in the LR playing games and watching the tube.....and he's healing from an injury (poor baby) What disturbs you most? Choose only ONE. 1. His Presence? 2. His location? 3.The game playing? 4.TV viewing? 5.the 4 more weeks? 5.That he's injured? You don't have to divulge what you chose...only you need to know. You make my job easier by being a bright, articulate woman. I can state the facts w/o having to explain them like I'm talking to a 3 yr. old. It will not hurt you one bit, 1st & foremost, to use the Home Spa trick...but that's your decision. Whether you do or least find yourself a quiet spot to be alone. Read your comment to yourself, changing positions w/ HIM. You're in the lounge and he's feeling what YOUR feeling about him...Give yourself some time to think about this. How does this TRULY impact you.....if it does? If you choose to share that answer with me, I'll continue. If not....hey, this was FREE!

profile image

Arlene V. Poma 5 years ago

Hmmmmm. Could it be that I feel BLAH because I have another four weeks with the BLOB in my living room who is playing Facebook games on his laptop and watching all kinds of TV 24/7 until his foot heals in four weeks? Or should I move the La-Z-Boy out to the street??? I could use a pedi, but I have this thing about people touching my feet . . . Hmmmm. Hmmmmm. Hmmmmmm.

fpherj48 profile image

fpherj48 5 years ago from Beautiful Upstate New York Author sweet man! Such kudos coming from you have started my day with a big smile...(or is that a big head?) lol Thank you so much.

Dexter Yarbrough profile image

Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States

I would hate to contaminate your outstanding hub with my worthless dribble because you wrote it so eloquently. So I will just say - Amen! Oh and hey, hey, voted up, up and away!

fpherj48 profile image

fpherj48 5 years ago from Beautiful Upstate New York Author

Hi there Sunshine! There IS definitely an element of PUSHING one's self..we can't allow ourselves to fold up and get stuck in a storage facility! Or what's the name of that facility? You're one damned smart lady!

Sunshine625 profile image

Sunshine625 5 years ago from Orlando, FL

Hi fpherj! I've been there and done it many times...yes even sunshine has her off days! I've found the best way to beat the blues is to try your darn best to laugh, even on days when you feel you aren't capable of cracking a smile...making someone else laugh will help the process along. Fantastic, helpful hub to many! Way to go! Voted UP among many others! Thank you for sharing :)

    0 of 8192 characters used
    Post Comment

    No HTML is allowed in comments, but URLs will be hyperlinked. Comments are not for promoting your articles or other sites.

    fpherj48 profile image

    Paula (fpherj48)848 Followers
    96 Articles

    Paula has freelanced for nearly 40 years. She has a passion for her forte of Behavioral Science & continuing education in this field.

    Click to Rate This Article