Diary Part 1 : Everything Changes
Six years ago I was living in a cozy studio that I picked with french doors and a cute claw bathtub. There was a window that faced me from my bed where the sun would set everyday.I loved it there. The place had a sweet cedar smell that filled the room whenever you walked in. I would sit and do my homework for my art classes there. I met my boyfriend of six years there, thinking we would be happily married by now. It was pure love at first. We loved, listened to music, talked, fought, and cried there.
The first date was candles and wine. How romantic. It was in October. We met in September. I was brunette then with chestnut highlights, now I'm blonde. I was six years younger and felt like I had my whole life to live, school to finish and dreams to be made. I started taking pictures of myself. Pictures that made me feel free and beautiful. He loved me. At the time. It's been slow and steady. On and off. I wish it wasn't that way. All we knew how to do was fight.
The sun would set and leave a warm hue against my back wall. Now I see that hue from across the street in this building. Even though it has a balcony, I don't like it as much. That year my dad died of pancreatic cancer. I became a depressive mess. I don't really know much of what happened then. It was all a blur. It felt as if my innocence was lost and I was gone for awhile. To be continued...
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