Happy Living Alone

I'm the quiet one in a family of people who love to talk. Because of this, I LOVE living alone. I love being alone. When I have the house to myself it's like I bathe in the silence the way some people like to bake themselves in the sun. The world is much lovelier in silence.

I know not everyone likes being or living alone. Of course, the people who talk a lot must find it hard to not have someone to share everything with. But, that's not me.

Sure I talk to myself a bit. It's so seldom I get to speak without being interrupted. I like hearing myself complete a sentence, even a whole thought.

How to be Alone and Like It

Of course, this won't work for everyone. Some people are just social animals, true extroverts who need to have other people around in order for themselves to shine. I don't really and truly understand that but I try to.

  • Keep making plans. Have new things to do. Don't put yourself on the shelf just because you don't have someone else around each day.
  • Don't slack off. Take up exercising. It's a good way to spend time with a group of people plus it keeps you active.
  • Know you are good enough by yourself. You don't need approval or feedback from others to be a complete person - you are a complete person just as you are.
  • Put yourself, your opinions, your ideas and your values first. You don't have to ignore all that free advice, but consider your own judgements first, give yourself top priority.
  • Become an observer. You don't have to comment on everything, you don't have to participate in everything but you should take an interest to at least learn a bit about everything. Participate in your own life rather than taking a back seat.
  • Appreciate the silence. Soak in the delicious soothing calm of life without extra sound bouncing around from wall to wall inside your head and out.
  • Enjoy a conversation with just yourself. Don't feel you have to obey some rule about what's normal. It doesn't hurt anyone for you to talk to yourself.
  • Be grateful for what you have. Don't fall into becoming a pessimist. See what you have, right in front of you. Look for the good things and that's what you will find/ see.
  • Value the people you have in your life and the people you meet just once. Don't be stingy with smiles, waves and hellos.
  • Treat yourself. Cook yourself a great dinner at home. Go to bed early or sleep in - just because you can (and you have the whole bed to yourself). Give yourself a spa weekend, in your own place. Do things to please yourself, honour yourself.
  • Create your living space to your own taste and style. Give yourself the best reading nook ever, the most luxurious bathroom or well stocked kitchen - make your home suit your personal interests and the person you are.
  • Avoid bad habits like smoking, too much drinking, etc. You won't have anyone to notice you're smoking or drinking too much and we tend to make excuses or ignore something like that ourselves.
  • Don't stagnate. Rearrange, redecorate and switch things around. It's nice to have something new in your day to day life.
  • Don't buy endless stuff. Think about what you really need and want - avoid clutter which could too easily lead to hoarding and having more stuff than you can use or even managed to deal with.
  • Be creative. Bring new things into your life, take on fresh projects, learn new crafts and ideas. The nice thing about being creative and alone is doing it all to please yourself, do it all your way.
  • Don't become a TV couch potato or someone who only interacts with other people through the Internet. If you keep yourself shut away you could end up being a shut in, someone uncomfortable with being out in the world, meeting new people. Don't let yourself become afraid of life and people outside the safety of your front door.
  • Keep track of your own achievements. When you don't have people to give you congratulations or feedback you need to know yourself and feel good about what you have done and done well.
  • When you have a plan for the day or the future you can begin right away. Don't delay. You don't need to get the ok from someone else, you don't have to change your plans to suit someone else, so start making them.
  • Go out for coffee, go out for a movie and go out for dinner, alone. I like to bring a book and people watch too, especially if I get a seat with a view outside.
  • If you don't want to be alone, you don't have to. Volunteer, get together with family and friends. There are always people who will be happy to find a use for any time you can give them.

Book lovers never go to bed alone.
Book lovers never go to bed alone. | Source

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Comments 11 comments

That Grrl profile image

That Grrl 3 years ago from Barrie, Ontario, Canada Author

One of the best things about living alone and being single is (still) having the bed to myself. :)


WiccanSage profile image

WiccanSage 3 years ago

I share a 950 square foot apartment with my husband, 2 teen boys, a 40 lb lab-pitt mix and a guinea pig. I actually envy people who live alone-- I love my family but dang it gets crowded here lol. Great article.


baygirl33 profile image

baygirl33 4 years ago from Hamilton On.

Hello!

What a lovely hub!I do live alone and sometimes I feel lonely,but mostly I'm learning to handle it. You are so right in that the space is one's own and private and free to do or not do.

Thank you for the validation!


That Grrl profile image

That Grrl 4 years ago from Barrie, Ontario, Canada Author

We get pressured to be extroverts. My Mother was always after me to be more social. But, I just never could be that loud.


patchofearth profile image

patchofearth 4 years ago from somewhere in the appalachian foothills

An introvert is someone who derives pleasure from an interior life-- the things going on in his or her own head. When we want to unwind, we like to be by ourselves and enjoy the solitude. You are definitely talking the language of the introvert here. Thumbs up.


jpcmc profile image

jpcmc 4 years ago from Quezon CIty, Phlippines

It really takes dedication to look after children. I would say the same with working in the front lines. Cashiering is one tough job. Just imagine all the personality types you will encounter. Good luck my friend.


mours sshields 4 years ago from Elwood, Indiana

Very good article! And, great suggestions! I'm married with 3 kids,plus a friend who lives in our home. However, I usually enjoy my alone time when I get it, too! Very good hub!

Marcia Ours


That Grrl profile image

That Grrl 4 years ago from Barrie, Ontario, Canada Author

Thank you for your comments. I also looked after children (my sister's kids) and worked in retail as a cashier for years. It take a lot out of you to be working with children or the public, both can be demanding at times. You have to give a lot of yourself and you certainly are in the front lines versus people working in an office and taking phone calls, etc. That time after work is something to be treasured. I used to love the bus ride home and I didn't mind that it would take an hour or longer to get home. The secret was waiting for rush hour traffic to die off a bit, otherwise you were packed into the bus and not peaceful at all.


jpcmc profile image

jpcmc 4 years ago from Quezon CIty, Phlippines

I think some people don't like living alone because of safety risks. But I understand the value of solitude. It's peaceful and simple. There are many times when I choose to be by myself. Live well and be happy my friend. Thanks for sharing.


lrc7815 profile image

lrc7815 4 years ago from Central Virginia

Great hub. There is a huge difference in being alone and being lonely. I think to enjoy being alone is to have come to terms with knowing who you are and liking it.


phdast7 profile image

phdast7 4 years ago from Atlanta, Georgia

That Grrl - Excellent advice.. I was married for 21 years and raised three rambunctious little boys. I am fairly social and as a teacher I am around people all day, lots of people. And I love coming home to my quiet peaceful house. Its just me and the cats and I love it....for all the reasons you mentioned. :) Great Hub. Sharing.

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