Healing Depression -- His Way

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The Verse:

As taken from the Faith-filled Catholic Women’s Bible, by NAB Fireside Catholic Publishing, Wichita, Kansas –

Yes, in joy you shall depart,

In peace you shall be brought back;

Mountains and hills shall break out in song

Before you,

And all the trees of the countryside shall

Clap their hands.

Isaiah 55:12

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The "ME" Today

Most definitely, I am NOT depressed. My friends at present can't believe that I even went through that. Not everyone I know knew of my suicide attempts because of severe depression. To many, I portray a sunshiny, positive attitude. Well, that’s true - I am sunshiny. But, I wasn’t – not always.

Even though at times it's hard, I work on maintaining my sunny disposition. I realized the joyful me results in many positive outcomes.

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The Causes of My Depression

Overcoming depression isn't easy because the causes are many times left ignored. Maybe, it is also because of the complexity – the causes run into one another.

Veering into grief was what started my depression. My father passed away followed by two aunts who're very dear to me. I wasn't able to grieve properly because after the funerals, I went headlong into work. I didn't realized I masked the pains of grieving which created a lot of fears - like the unknown and death.

Each fears, pains and sufferings I experienced negatively from thereon turned into helplessness, frustrations, despair and sadness. Because of death, I can't look forward, I can't plan ahead. The list of my fears grew long. Then there are sufferings – from job losses to goal failures; to fake friendships and the humiliation of being different. I also suffered from the hands of cruel relatives who seemed to derive pleasure in using me as a punching bag for unknown fault of mine. The stress of living a hard life everyday for many years with not having a solution made me very depressed. So when the good times come, it is like unbelievable, it felt like a hallucination.

Reasoning to myself that the bad times will go away made me feel like I'm denying reality. For more than 10 years, I felt unworthy even just to wish to have a nice Christmas dinner for my family. Then one day, just like in the story books, the feelings of unworthiness and misery came to a stop. To conquer depression, I realized that my reasonings should come with internal conviction. And, I knew that I just didn't came to that thought by myself. It was through my daily prayer. God worked HIS miraculous healing embrace in me.

The Three (3) P – words that helps me conquer depression:

It's no mistake. The word "helps" is in present tense because I continue on with the Five P to avoid depression and anxiety, as both are occuring illnesses like the flu.

1. Prayer – always at all times of the day be in communication with God. Through praying, the seed of faith grew inside me. My husband Jack, whenever he sees me having my panic attack, he’ll calmly remind me the Serenity Prayer which goes: “God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can and the wisdom to know the difference.” At very, very trying times when all thought fled me, only one prayer remains “JESUS help me, please.” Over and over, that’s just what I say and everything will pass.

I find this site helpful in my daily prayer moments –

http://www.ourcatholicprayers.com/

2. Positive thinking – if the blind can do it, I can do it. I gave myself the WILL to turn negative and bad thoughts around. I got some steps to go about it:

a. I confront my insecurities and think about my strengths or whatever I am good at. Then, I say my good stuff aloud.

b. I jot down notes whenever I feel bluesy. Then, I read them over and scratch out all the negative words I see and change it into positive words. I sometimes doodle or sketch what I feel, whether hurtful feelings or situations; then redo it into a more colorful or nicer looking picture. It’s a release. A huge release of emotion and it will not well up inside and form into depression.

c. I jog in place while praying or singing whenever I feel anxiety building up inside me.

3. Playing - believe me, GOD doesn't want us to mope around. He wants us to be happy. Heaven is everywhere wherever God is. Any sort of good games or hobby will do or any activities will suffice. As long as the mind is active and in a an enjoyable state, both sadness and depression are absent.

Other solutions that helped me:

Helping me get over severe depression is my husband Jack. It really would be nice to have somebody with you who can love you no matter what, whether he understands or not, Jack's here with me.

Everybody needs somebody through all times, both happy and sad. There are helpline in case you need to talk, just dial these numbers –

US National Suicide Prevention Hotline 1-800-273-8255 (TALK)

National Hopeline Network 1-800-784-2433

Or go to helpful websites like –

http://www.befrienders.org/index.asp

Along with my husband's support, I went to seek medical help. I was prescribed Lexapro and Seroquel; and when I feel the oncoming panic attack, I take Xanax. Am glad I weaned myself away from those prescriptions. Now, the only medications I take are my bp and gastro meds. My doctors helped me a lot get through my ordeal. I also am thankful I have priests and nuns who were able to talked with me, prayed with me, counseled me. They guided me towards my spiritual growth for which I am thankful and for which I know is my foundation in being mentally sound and emotionally stable and strong.

Life is much better for me now that I am on track. I'm in control and when I feel I'm not, I lift everything up to JESUS. I pray, I tell Jesus what bothers me, making me scared, or just about anything that triggers an anxiety attack and depression. I realized it is His way that healed me. He sent me people support, the right medications and of course His Holy Spirit enlightened me to exercise my will -- the yearning of healing. So am healed.

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Comments 8 comments

ShaneMorris profile image

ShaneMorris 5 years ago from Springfield, MO

I respect your outlook on things and I'm glad have faith, real faith - not just practiced when people are looking. I think your tips here are nicely fine-boiled down to the basics. I think the faith is absolutely necessary. Here's the thing, my father (a former pastor) had always taught me to befriend all, but just never let convictions that some may have stain your mind. He didn't say "stain your mind", but I thought it had a nice sound. So through high school - to the day I have been collectively friends with many different types of personalities and human beings, and it wasn't always the good kinds. Today, I live in a house with six - or is it seven? - people that I met while working in a downtown restaurant awhile back. We live in a house right by campus, I'm the only one who has faith, but I don't let that deter me. I've got many flaws that I don't deny and by no means am I saint but, as one of your steps suggested, I try to live my life justly. Through being an only child, I've had a-lot of time developing my observant quality and I have to admit that I think I can usually tell much of a person by the way they carry themselves, how they talk, how their eyes move when they're talking to you, etc. so I do try very hard to always give someone a chance - until they mess it up. It seems like I've been taken advantage of by many of the most important people in my life so I've become stubborn. Society is not the same thing as it was years ago. All I can do is just meet everyone with a smile, and make sure to check my back pocket for my wallet. :)


MonetteforJack profile image

MonetteforJack 5 years ago from Tuckerton, NJ Author

Shane, thank you. I am moved by your comment. Moreover, I am awed with the fact that here you are, so young and yet you are mature and responsible. In life, yeah, FAITH is everything and you're right, being grounded and practical. Nowadays, we really have to look at our back pockets and have our keys all the time. Thanks again.


kittythedreamer profile image

kittythedreamer 5 years ago from the Ether

Voted up and beautiful, MonetteforJack. Very encouraging and inspiring for those who battle depression in their lives. It is definitely an internal battle and you have written about it so personally and gracefully here. Great job. Keep hubbing and keep your head up!


MonetteforJack profile image

MonetteforJack 5 years ago from Tuckerton, NJ Author

Thank you, I appreciate it very much :)


Timi 5 years ago

Very inspiring, Monette... Keep the faith dear friend... Life is beautiful and God loves us all... :-)


Ann 5 years ago

Finally, my friend put 'em all n writing! I remember our endless phone chats when I was in Mississippi, and I am glad to realize now after reading this that I actualy didn't miss any of your episodes, because you've trusted me well enough to tell them all to me before, in all its finest detail. I feel happy now that I did tell you to write, because seeing your words in print, it all seemed like "art." You just write beautifully, Monette,and everything seemed to resonate in prayer. Your "depression" didn't sound so bad ater all. It is an honest-to-goodness truth of your ordeal, and I admire that you deal with it with dignity. Thank you for the inspiration, and looking forward to reading more from you, my beautiful friend in Jersey! Your friend who's constantly on a journey, literally that is, Ann


MonetteforJack profile image

MonetteforJack 5 years ago from Tuckerton, NJ Author

Aww ... you're sweet, Ann ... I am trying to improve my writing skills. I read up on other hubbers as well and I gain insights, too. I haven't discussed my depression to great detail because it seems like an unbelievable situation, so with my attempts at suicide. Now, I realized that Jesus is with all of us all the time if only we let Him and of course, the support of family and good friends -- truly, am very blessed more than I really deserve. Join the hubbers, Ann !!! I know you have stories to tell, too. God bless and talk with you soon.


James A Watkins profile image

James A Watkins 3 years ago from Chicago

I am so glad that you feel better these days. You have Jack and you have Jesus to help you. Thank God! You are truly blessed.

Thank you for sharing this part of your story.

James :)

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