Illusions of The Past

We are not perfect but living in past mistakes is a sure road to the illusion that we are not worthy of success. Illusions of how bad we were keep us from being better. If we get stuck in the past then we live in illusions. Our vision of the past is faulty in most circumstances. We need to live in the now. Good judgement usually comes from bad judgement. Solutions are found in looking forward not backward.

If we look back and see the bad judgement that we exercised only then we are bound to repeat them. If we look back and see what the solutions were at that time then we are bound to live them in the now.

No we do not mean all the images what we mean are negative images. You do not need to go see a psychiatrist and we are not talking about the ever so popular notion of repressed memories. We are not talking about warm fuzzy feelings we had nestled in our mother's bosom. We are talking about the images that we have that are condemning us to view ourselves as less than perfect.

How can a person who was the youngest of four move forward in the world if she still views life as everyone bigger, stronger and smarter than she. She must somehow treasure the feelings of security and yet rid herself of the image of being a youngest and smallest and needy. And certainly the oldest child must rid themselves of the feelings of being better than the rest. The comparative thoughts we develop as children must be treated as illusions. We grew up with the illusion of comparing ourselves to others and must "grow out of it".

Today many fall prey to a drive to become more perfect. Just think of plastic surgery. Wow what a concept. (we do not mean that which is necessary for health or repair) "If only my nose was smaller and by boobs were bigger". Just think of big cars that are unnecessary. Why does the computer programmer need a monster truck in his driveway? Everyone does not need to be a supervisor at work yet we all strive to be one. Why does an amateur writer on the net need more page views?

Shoot, there are even preacher men on tv that would have you believe that if you accept their version of God that you will have more in life. Kind of misses the point doesn't it? There are some who even claim that if you give more to their charity you will be a better person. And just watch or read beauty ads or articles, if you use their product or technique walla you will be more beautiful. And men take this pill and your wife will love you more.

We live in an illusion of "if I have or do this I will be more perfect". How sad is that?

You can live in the moment and still shoot for the moon in striving for a more abundant life. There is a time and place and space and season for all things. Why not go to school in your fifties, believe me when I tell you there is more to learn out there. Why not make plans to accomplish goals. This is not a problem. The problem is in the illusion that it will make your life better.

We are not recommending to throw away your dreams we are simply suggesting that you dream more fruitfully. Do not dream of the past trials and tribulations and do not dream of the future as fulfilling what others think. Stop with the relativity of wealth and good looks and power you are the perfect you. And yes that you includes your hopes and aspirations and goals and dreams.

Here is a mantra that you can focus on. Please let me be me and a more happy me at that.

There was a man who was most giving of himself. Others saw this in him and loved him for it. But as he was helping the homeless and the needy he was always thinking that he was not good enough. You see, in his empathy toward others he envisioned himself the same and did not realize the treasure that he was. He was so full of self loathing that one day after helping to feed 100 people he went home and declared to his wife that he was worthless because he did not buy his wife a new car so she could be proud. He declared that he would stop spending so much time helping others and spend more time working to provide more money for his wife. She wiped away her own tears and reminded him that she loved him for who he was and his good and kind giving spirit. We all have a bit of this man in us. We become blind to what makes us special. And we sometimes succumb to the notions of the world and what would make us proud in their eyes. We need good people like spouses to remind us.

Perhaps many of us need to look at ourselves and what we offer and be satisfied with that. Oh and that man went on to build and operate one of the largest homeless shelters in California. Because while satisfied he still strives to help even more needy folk.

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