I'm having a hard time being me - How can I change and make a difference in my life and the lives of others?

Having a hard time with you

Having a hard time being you? If the answer is yes, do not beat yourself up, instead understand where it may be coming from and make a choice to turn things around. Many people suffer from low self esteem and negative thinking, they either feel they are not attractive enough, smart enough, worthy of a place in society or feel they have nothing to contribute to others and the environment around them. Sometimes many of these feelings come from an abusive dysfunctional childhood or from emotions they have developed from unhealthy relationships.

Whatever the reason, first things first, stop beating yourself up and stop pointing the finger at others or blaming the circumstances you are in. That is clearly misplaced energy that serves you and those around you no good. Begin living in the now, making clear conscious decisions to make a change for you and your future.

Responsibility can be a grand action and it can begin to open doors for you. Begin taking responsibility for your life as it is in the now. No more blame, no more shame, just a clean cut start to a new way of thinking. Now that you have decided to be responsible, you can begin to choose to make a difference.

Five things that will help you make a difference in your life and in the life of others.

1 – Resentments. Let them go, they will eat you up alive, serve no purpose other than become your number one offender. Wasted energy, while you are busy being pissed at others, the circumstances, people and things will go on as usual, the only one suffering will be you, so let it go.

2 – Acceptance. If it is what it is, than that is exactly what it is. Let it be, if things are not going your way no matter how hard you try, than perhaps it may just be meant to be. Release the frustration and begin to find peace within.

3 – Helping others. Once you begin to help others, you will soon learn nothing is more gratifying. Make a difference in people’s lives, give of your time and give an ear. So many people want to be heard, become a listener, advocate for other’s well being, so many of us need someone. Experience the real gift of giving.

4 – Forgive. Heal your heart and the heart of another; sense a relief, a freedom that can only be earned through forgiveness. Let go and let GOD, a humble heart is an open heart for receiving all that is good and pure.

5 – Honesty. What part did you play in it all? Honesty with others is important, but being honest with you, it brings much wisdom. Really look deep inside, what are your motives? Once you know yourself you can begin to improve yourself.

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Comments 27 comments

Cagsil profile image

Cagsil 5 years ago from USA or America

Hey Madison, you did an excellent job. Very nicely written. :) Most people fail to realize that the single great threat in their life is themselves. I've written several hubs on explaining how to begin the process of change. It starts from being completely responsible for every aspect of life and as you said- resentment- have no regrets from any actions you've taken. Don't regret any reaction your actions create either. We all make choices and it's those choices that create the situation or circumstances we get ourselves into. Great hub! :)


Happyboomernurse profile image

Happyboomernurse 5 years ago from South Carolina

Hi Madison22,

Thanks for sharing your 5 points on how to make a difference in one's own life and in the lives of others.

The pointers you give are a good starting place.


Madison22 profile image

Madison22 5 years ago from NYC Author

Cagsil, Wow, so awesome to have you stop by and read my hub. I really respect your point of view, it is an honor to recieve a comment from such a great writer, thank you!!


Madison22 profile image

Madison22 5 years ago from NYC Author

Happy, thank you. I am so glad you enjoyed my hub. Thanks again for your comment, I really appreciate it.:)


suziecat7 profile image

suziecat7 5 years ago from Asheville, NC

Great advice - some of which I need to adopt in my own life. Super Hub.


beth811 profile image

beth811 5 years ago from Philippines

Madison, I'm feeling the same too! I feel like I'm hating myself and people around me most of the time. I'm thankful that I stumbled on this hub.

Beautiful hub! Rated up!


IGotSunshine profile image

IGotSunshine 5 years ago from USA

Very helpful and insightful. A lot of people surely can relate to your suggestions. Thanks.


Madison22 profile image

Madison22 5 years ago from NYC Author

Suzie, thank you for reading my hub and commenting!


Madison22 profile image

Madison22 5 years ago from NYC Author

Beth, I am also grateful you stumbled upon my hub, I hope it helps.:)


Madison22 profile image

Madison22 5 years ago from NYC Author

Igotsunshine, I really appreciate your comment, thank you for reading!


Denise Handlon profile image

Denise Handlon 5 years ago from North Carolina

Nicely written. Thanks for sharing this lovely hub. Happy Holidays.


Cari Jean profile image

Cari Jean 5 years ago from Bismarck, ND

You've just described the last five years of my life! I have been on a journey of emotional and spiritual healing and I finally feel as though I know who I am and that I can start being me!


heart4theword profile image

heart4theword 5 years ago from hub

Sometimes the responsibilities of the everyday life, don't leave much room for me, to be me? The needs of others come first, by the time I take care of my daily tasks, there is no time left for my natural abilities to surface. So I vent here on hubpages once in awhile:) In the mean time, I keep on..keeping on, and pray for God's Strength to give me the endurance I need. Encouraging Hub! Thankyou:)


Cheeky Girl profile image

Cheeky Girl 5 years ago from UK and Nerujenia

Fix the things in your own life and then things in other areas will transform too. We all get so much life, if we only ever use it right and spend our time and energy wisely, we will be all productive and content. There is nothing wrong in helping and giving to others of our time, as it is another amazing way of being fulfilled and accomplished.


Neil Sperling profile image

Neil Sperling 5 years ago from Port Dover Ontario Canada

I agree 100% with Cheeky Girl - she is a sweet wise friend.

Full Speed Ahead, One Inch At A Time


Madison22 profile image

Madison22 5 years ago from NYC Author

Cheeky Girl, you put that so eloquently! Neil is so right, you are wise. :-)


Madison22 profile image

Madison22 5 years ago from NYC Author

Neil, thank you so much for reading!!


gguy profile image

gguy 5 years ago from new jersey usa

Madison, keep up the good work!!


fucsia profile image

fucsia 5 years ago

Great Hub! I totally understand what you wrote about people who suffer from low self esteem and negative thinking. I often feel sad for this kind of thoughts. Maybe it is better to say: I often felt sad... Because I am learning to love myself, also through the steps that you have described.

Thanks for your help!


Jaspals profile image

Jaspals 5 years ago from India / Australia

Wonderful article full of insight. Thanks for sharing thoughts. Keep writing.


Madison22 profile image

Madison22 5 years ago from NYC Author

Thank you, Jaspais!


loua profile image

loua 5 years ago from Elsewhere, visiting Earth ~ the segregated community planet

Madison, you stated it quite well, succinct and to the point; how to get in step with one's conscience...


Madison22 profile image

Madison22 5 years ago from NYC Author

Thank you so much Ioua!


catgypsy profile image

catgypsy 3 years ago from the South

A great hub with some wonderful advice. Letting go of resentment is so important and something I have to remind myself of sometimes. We get wrapped up in our feelings and don't realize we are the only ones suffering, as you said. Great list of things we need to change for ourselves!


Madison22 profile image

Madison22 3 years ago from NYC Author

Thank you so much Catgypsy!


rajan jolly profile image

rajan jolly 3 years ago from From Mumbai, presently in Jalandhar,INDIA.

Very sound advice. It is important not not only stop blaming oneself but others as well for the hard times one is facing. It is extremely important to let go and learn to accept things as they are if we cannot change them.

Love all the 5 points enumerated herein. Awesome hub. Voted as such and useful.


Madison22 profile image

Madison22 3 years ago from NYC Author

Thank you, Rajan!

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