Myself and Life in a Foreign Country

How my life changed when I moved to Croatia.

I did not know much about the place I had moved to, and that had taken a part of my life with it. My open mind allowed for a good beginning in a foreign country.

I know sharing my life experiences with other individuals would be most helpful. Those who have experienced similar situations will benefit from my experience.

I survived a greater life than I had ever known and do not regret all the hard times I experienced. I learned and am still learning through my experiences, from the past and in the present.

I want to write and continue to write to let myself grow even more in this different life. I can handle life. I did not know what I was capable of until I felt myself in that position.

I walked right into a life with no idea of what would be. Now I see my true self as who I am, and not for who I was. The changes came over me when I had least expected them.

Many people listened to how I came to live in a foreign country and found it to be an incredible experience! Most people would walk away, and I know of a few who walked away from the different life in Croatia.

What did I experience in a foreign country?

• Disagreements.
• Anger.
• Disappointments.
• Feeling alone moments.
• Frustration.
• Stressed moments.
• The difficult people around me.
• The jealous next-door neighbour.
• Acceptance from the local people.
• Negative people.
• The Croatian language.
• Opinions of others.
• Dealing with doubt.
• Weather.
• Culture.
• Religion.
• Family.
• Finances.
• Unhappiness.
• Sadness.
• Gossips.
• Documents.
• Employment.

Writing. about my experience and meeting different people. Daily activities and the traditional lifestyle have created happy moments.

The different generations. Mishaps along the way improved my day-to-day routine. I had to learn new laws. In trying to keep up with the normal life I had in mind. The many factors that have allowed me to write a memoir are still in my thoughts.

The change in my life and all of what I had to go through in over a decade made me a stronger individual. Living that long in a foreign country makes me feel like a stranger in my family. I formed a steady and balanced foundation and decided to follow my ideas.

I did not feel happy with the way everything had changed in my life, and I did not see myself in these situations and had no idea what to make of everything. Of course, there was much gossip, and mistakes about another life.

People do not always accept foreigners and I did not feel accepted by most of the local people.

I did not mope and wait for someone to come along and feel pity for me and occupy my life with what I am familiar with.

I had it all gone for me back in my place of birth. Something changed in me, I felt freedom was no longer there. People in most parts of South Africa live in well-protected homes.

▪ Why should I be the prisoner in my own home?

• A life I could no longer grasp anymore.
• Moving away was the only option.
• My life changed in two places for different reasons.

▪ 2002 – The change flooded my mind with a million thoughts. I had worked out what I felt would be my best. Life gave me another view of this life.

It is nobody's fault; I do not blame anyone for the way things changed. The less I knew the better it was at that time about this foreign country.

My parents somehow knew in advance that my life would change and that I would go through a tough time living in a foreign country.

▪ I didn't know about the country I chose to live in.

Leaving South Africa to me was my way out of danger. I did not think about the effect. Everything at that time appeared too good to be true. Staying in a family home was not the best of ideas, it was the only choice.

Renting town apartments was rather expensive. I learned to be patient and happy with my life. I did not want to go back to restart my life.

Pride did get in the way. I made up my mind to live in Croatia the place of freedom for me.

I did not want to live as a prisoner. I have a mind of my own and feel free to make my own decisions. I don't like dwelling on the past life that is not my way of life.

I miss my family and feel for them living their lives in danger. Sometimes the decisions one makes can be for selfish reasons. One must fight to survive this rough world. On my arrival in Croatia, the friendly and hospitable family members were very pleased to meet me.

Only I knew what it felt like sitting there and not knowing any more about these foreign people and their culture.

That night everything and everyone around me felt strange, and I felt confused. My life changed from that day.

My life from the week before just disappeared from me. Travelling for a week was a lovely time but not so comfy.

I felt like I could no longer hold on to what was in my life. I saw the way the special moments vanished each day and knew each time I tore.

I had to let go of those moments and did not let go of my being only of what was in my life. The past life that I know now will not exist in this place.

Something I understood from my side of life. I couldn't explain or constantly argue about what I realized was going in another direction.

I had to figure this out on my own, and the many different moments, looking at photos of the foreign place, including the discussions of Croatia did not enlighten me further about Croatia.

I felt easy when I was alone and with my family but not when with foreign people.

It made me feel stronger at my weakest points. My move to a new place opened my mind to many different avenues. I could see my life going in another direction the one I knew of.

There was no communication when sitting in a room with different people speaking the Croatian language, I sat there and wondered when this nightmare would be over.

Everyone had conversations I had a lot to say but couldn't do it without being able to speak the language.
I smiled at their conversations and looked around the room as if to know something, but I didn't know.

It felt difficult when forced to learn the language. The process made me feel frustrated. I wanted to learn the language on my own.

''You must speak the Croatian language,''

This a line I often heard, and this was from the very first day of my stay in Croatia. I knew I would learn the language but in my time. It is important to belong in society and to have found my place in a foreign country.