Pregnancy Can Be Gross and Embarassing!

Sometimes Pregnancy is Disgusting

Everyone has heard of the glow of pregnancy, what about the not so positive aspects? The gross and smelly aspects?  Read about some common pregnancy woes and what you can do about them. 

The Gift of Pregnancy

  1. Morning Sickness - There is nothing glamorous about throwing up all the time. Usually it only lasts for one trimester, if you get it all all. However, that time can be hell, especially if you are working. If you work in an office with automatic flush toilets they will flush in your face while you are throwing up. This is obviously not good. Keep a couple of post-it notes on you, quickly stick one over the sensor as you are getting ready to vomit, it will stop the crazy face flushing. Also, sucking on hard candy helps to calm the stomach. Also, get rid of excess saliva in your mouth. It's common during pregnancy and it can make you completely sick if you don't spit it out. Try to be discreet.
  2. Leaking Urine - Sometimes pregnancy comes with a bit of urinary incontinence, especially when you vomit, cough, or sneeze. Many pregnant women have come to the doctor convinced their water has broken when in reality they just released a little urine. If you have a problem with this just wear a light days panty liner to avoid wet undies and the smell that goes along with it. Sadly, the smell will be painfully obvious to you.
  3. Very Sensitive Sense of Smell - A pregnant woman's sense of smell can be extreme and someone else's lunch can lead to sickness. I found that a small, quiet fan on my desk worked wonders when my office mate went on a tuna salad kick. Also, walks outside can give relief. You may find that you have to change soaps or deodorants because the smell bothers you so much.
  4. The Walking Farts - I don't really have a solution to this one, just know that it does happen. If you feel it coming on try to take the path less traveled. For me, pushing a shopping cart seemed to bring it on. I don't know if there's anything to that, but I found it true for me. Also, be careful getting up too quickly, no only will it make you dizzy it could lead to some unexpected flatulence.
  5. Sensitivity to the Sun - Some people, myself included found that their skin is very sensitive during pregnancy and that sunburns are much easier to come by during this time. Use sunscreen, don't sunbathe. The last thing you want is another source of discomfort.
  6. Excessive Hair - Much to my chagrin, after over a year and several thousand dollars of laser hair removal treatments, pregnancy made me grow hair similar to a gorilla in the jungle. My arm hairs were black and about an inch and a half long. I had a trail of black hair from my belly button to my public line. The hair on my legs grew like crazy. I just shaved it all, constantly, with the exception of the arm hair which I plucked, it was painful, it gets more difficult the bigger you get. As I got further along my husband had to take over my lower legs. Gross, I know.
  7. Labor and Delivery Disasters - Most women have a fear in the back of their mind. It's a fear you don't want to share with your doctor. What if you have a bowel movement while you are pushing the baby out? It does happen on occasion. Just know that when you are giving birth you will lose every shred of dignity that you have. You are spread out on a table for the doctors and nurses, and your partner to see. There is amniotic fluid and blood. It's not pretty. They tell you to push like you are having a bowel movement, it makes sense that you might have one.                                                                         Luckily, nature is on your side. Women tend to slow way down on eating as labor becomes imminent. This means that you make not even have anything to produce. Even if you do, it's not a huge deal, the doctors and nurses just clean it up and move on. I have not personally had a bowel movement on the delivery table but I know two people that did and they both said it was handled quickly and professionally. I did, over the course of three labors pee on a nurse, throw up on myself, and fart in a doctor's face. All were momentarily mortifying and then we all got back to the work at hand. There was no judging, I promise. I know it's hard to let go of the idea, but just bear down and push, baby needs to come out.

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