Reflection on the Suicide of a Child

The Front Door

Where does my heart go, my darling, my son

When you’ve taken the memories away

Your presence, the comfort, the sound of your voice

Disappearing in one single day

Where do I go to think back with a smile

On the good times and love that we shared

For what you have done to yourself and to us

Makes me wonder if you ever cared

Heartache and hoping and loving and pride

I think back on all that I’ve been through

The wonderful, horrible, beautiful times

That I’ve spent in my life raising you

So how could you go; how could this be so

It is all I can do now to pray

Walking in the front door, I just miss you more

Than I did when you first went away


The Lily Pond

My Son,

That bright, inquiring face

I’ve watched since you were small

Exploring life and studying

The wonders of it all

A happy, smart and funny child

Adventurous as you grew

I always was so very proud

But wonder if you knew

My Son,

We had our differences

And struggles through the years

They mean so very little now

When washed away by tears

I tried to show you

In my way

The words I say now every day

“I loved you more than I could say,”

My Son


Comments 4 comments

Jennitasia profile image

Jennitasia 7 years ago from Arkansas

I love it!

Eleven13 profile image

Eleven13 7 years ago Author

Thank you -- just added another, so both parents were represented.

Peggy W profile image

Peggy W 7 years ago from Houston, Texas

Heartfelt poetry. Sad. Hurt. Loneliness. Not understanding. Once we have crossed the barrier of death, perhaps it will become clearer to us and we may know the answers to many things that are now beyond our understanding.

Eleven13 profile image

Eleven13 7 years ago Author

I can't imagine the impact of losing a child at all, let alone to suicide, but I've known those who have gone through it. The bewilderment, sorrow, anger, remorse -- all so powerful. There are few answers that comfort them. I agree, crossing that barrier of death may be what it takes to put events like this in perspective. The challenge becomes to live well until that time.

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