Unconditional Love of my Mother: In Memory of Mom

My Mother and I In April of 2008

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The Death of My Mother

The words came slowly and sadly from my brother, "Ma passed away last night." I wasn't shocked by these words, because mom had been suffering terribly from Parkinson's disease for the past two years. The disease had taken such a toll on her that she couldn't walk or talk and had to be fed through a tube into her stomach before she died.

i controlled my sorrow while talking with my brother, but after I got off the phone I started to realize that I had lost the only person in my life who had given me unconditional love. Ma gave that love to all of my sisters and brother. In good times and in bad times, she loved us all equally and never expected anything in return.

My Mother, Father, and Youngest Sister

This picture was taken around 1996.
This picture was taken around 1996. | Source

Unconditional Love of my Mother

I will really miss the unconditional love, forgiveness, and caring ma had as mother for all of us. No matter how many times we hurt her with things we did, ma was always ready to forgive us. From the time I broke the record player as a kid until the last time when I wasn't truthful about my intentions to stay overseas, ma could always forgive, even though I knew she was hurt. I remember living in a warm home while growing up, because ma was always there as a caring mother. She quizzed me so many times on spelling words as a young boy, and encouraged me to dare to be different and follow my dream, although it meant I would be away from her for long periods of time. While I was away to school, in the Navy, and living overseas, ma was the only person who would regularly write me letters, send cards, and always send a Christmas gift package with candy and cookies. She did this up until four years before her death.

A Self-Educated Woman

Although my mother had to drop out of school after the ninth grade, she became a self-educated person. Besides reading a lot, she wrote some poetry and even had a cookbook published. Our house had a big library which was filled with all kinds of stimulating interesting books. In her later years, ma collected a lot of antiques and art work. About a year before she passed away, I still remember her sitting in a chair reading a newspaper one morning.

A Strong Woman

Ma had a strong will, treated everyone equally, and wasn't afraid to fight for her rights. After dad started farming when I was young, we had a landlord who lived down the hill from us. He sometimes took advantage of my dad who was afraid to stand up for his rights. Ma was just the opposite. One day, I remember hearing her sternly "telling old Mac off" when he was making unreasonable demands. My brother, sisters and I were all treated equally, and everyone shared the chores and had their responsibility.

Remembering Mother

What do your remember most about your mother?

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My Mother and Father

Picture of mom and dad taken in the 1960s.
Picture of mom and dad taken in the 1960s. | Source

Mom and Children in 1958

My two oldest sisters and brother are with ma in the picture.  I am holding a dog.  My youngest sister, Connie, wasn't born yet.
My two oldest sisters and brother are with ma in the picture. I am holding a dog. My youngest sister, Connie, wasn't born yet. | Source

A Model Wife and Homemaker

When my father died in 2004, ma and dad had recently celebrated their 60th wedding anniversary. Throughout the marriage, ma had been a model housewife and more. After we scattered dad's ashes in the woods overlooking our old farm, ma and I drove up to see her three sisters in central Wisconsin. As I drove, ma was reminiscing a lot about dad and how their romance started when they rode the bus together in Milwaukee during the Second World War. Six weeks later they got married. Actually, when ma met dad she was already engaged to a richer man from her hometown. She broke off the engagement by sending the engagement ring back to Fred, and then traveling to Iowa with dad for a honeymoon after getting married in Milwaukee.

Ma and dad had similar interests and worked their whole lives for the future of us kids. Both stressed the importance of education to better one's life. if it wasn't for their sacrifice, two of my younger sisters and I wouldn't have graduated from college. After dad started farming in 1954, ma helped dad in the barn every day milking cows in addition to taking care of three young children. Ma also worked outside of the farm to help dad with bills after my youngest sister started the first grade. After dad stopped farming when my youngest sister graduated from law school, ma would accompany him to town where they enjoyed antique shopping and meeting and talking with elderly folk. Dad often had a hot streak, but I will always remember ma giving him unconditional love just like she did for all the kids.

A Generous Friend

Finally, my mother was a warm, generous, and outgoing person who had many friends. She was very generous, especially to relatives and friends of my father who would visit and always stay for dinner. In her later laters, she volunteered as a clerk at a Saint Vincent DePaul store and had many friends there.

Ma is gone now and we will all miss her very much. Her unconditional love will especially be missed. You deserve to be in heaven, ma!

Dorothy Kuehn, my mother, passed away on May 7, 2011.

© 2011 Paul Richard Kuehn

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Comments 31 comments

chuckandus6 profile image

chuckandus6 5 years ago from The Country-Side

Beautiful Tribute to you mom


cheri 5 years ago

A sweet recollection of your loving mom....she is smiling down on you with unconditional love.


Paul Kuehn profile image

Paul Kuehn 5 years ago from Udorn City, Thailand Author

Thanks chuckandus6 and cheri. I hope my mother likes this tribute to her.


phdast7 profile image

phdast7 4 years ago from Atlanta, Georgia

What a lovely and meaningful tribute to your sweet mother. You write very well of her character and personality -- I feel as if I know her. A sweet remembrance of a precious and beloved mother. I am sorry for your loss. Sharing.


Wesley Meacham profile image

Wesley Meacham 4 years ago from Wuhan, China

Sorry for your loss.


LaThing profile image

LaThing 4 years ago from From a World Within, USA

What a wonderful tribute to your Ma! I am sure she was proud of you, and she sounds like a wonderful woman..... Peace to you and your family!

Sharing.....


Paul Kuehn profile image

Paul Kuehn 4 years ago from Udorn City, Thailand Author

phdast7,

Thank you very much for reading the article about my mother and sharing.


Paul Kuehn profile image

Paul Kuehn 4 years ago from Udorn City, Thailand Author

Wesley,

Thank you for your sympathy. Make sure you treasure your mother while she is alive. You never know who you really have until you lose that person.


Paul Kuehn profile image

Paul Kuehn 4 years ago from Udorn City, Thailand Author

Thank you for reading and your very nice comments. I appreciate you sharing this.


rajan jolly profile image

rajan jolly 3 years ago from From Mumbai, presently in Jalandhar,INDIA.

This is a beautiful tribute to your Ma, Paul. You mom was a wonderful person. This reminds me of my mom who passed away in December 2010. The last couple of years she suffered from dementia and was in the nursing home being fed by a tube and not being able to walk or talk.

I miss her to this day. Mothers are always remembered for their unconditional love.

Voting this up all the way up and across, except one. Sharing and pinning.


PurvisBobbi44 profile image

PurvisBobbi44 3 years ago from Florida

Hi,

What a beautiful homage to your mother---and I can relate. I lost my mother early in life she was only 66 years old.

And I still miss her so much. For years I would start to phone her and then I remembered she was not here.

I still feel like an orphan and probably always will.

Bobbi Purvis


jainismus profile image

jainismus 3 years ago from Pune, India

Great memories of great mother. This hub remembered me my mother....


Paul Kuehn profile image

Paul Kuehn 3 years ago from Udorn City, Thailand Author

Rajan,

Thank you so much for your great comments about my mother. I'm sorry to hear about your mother, and it seems like the last years of her life were similar to my mother's. It seems like a mother is about the only person who can really give you unconditional love. I appreciate the votes and sharing of this hub.


Paul Kuehn profile image

Paul Kuehn 3 years ago from Udorn City, Thailand Author

PurvisBobbi,

Thank you very much for commenting on this hub. I'm so sorry to hear about you losing your mother at such an early age. Your great comments are appreciated.


Paul Kuehn profile image

Paul Kuehn 3 years ago from Udorn City, Thailand Author

jainismus,

Thank you very much for reading and commenting on my mother's hub. I appreciate your comments and am happy you like this hub.


moonlake profile image

moonlake 3 years ago from America

So sorry about your Mom I know it been 2 years but we never stop missing the ones we love. She sounds like a great woman. I know Parkinson is a terrible disease my husband's sister died from it last year. Shared your beautiful story of your Mom and voted up.


Scribenet profile image

Scribenet 3 years ago from Ontario, Canada

A beautiful tribute to a wonderful Mother.


tillsontitan profile image

tillsontitan 3 years ago from New York

I don't know how I missed this lovely tribute to your Mom. No matter how old we are or how sick our mother gets to be, there is no loss to equal losing your mother.

You made some wonderful points about the unselfishness and support only a mother can give. So sorry you had to lose her but she lives on in your memory.

Voted up, useful, awesome, and interesting.


tillsontitan profile image

tillsontitan 3 years ago from New York

I don't know how I missed this lovely tribute to your Mom. No matter how old we are or how sick our mother gets to be, there is no loss to equal losing your mother.

You made some wonderful points about the unselfishness and support only a mother can give. So sorry you had to lose her but she lives on in your memory.

Voted up, useful, awesome, and interesting.


JayeWisdom profile image

JayeWisdom 3 years ago from Deep South, USA

I enjoyed reading this beautiful tribute to your mother, Paul, and your reminisces about her love for her family. There is no one who loves us like our mother and no one who can take her place when she's gone. I, too, treasure my mother's memory and understand the void the loss of your "Ma" left in your life. I don't think we ever stop missing our mothers after we lose them, but the memories grow sweeter with time as the pain eases. I hope it is that way with you now.

Voted Up and Beautiful

Jaye


Paul Kuehn profile image

Paul Kuehn 3 years ago from Udorn City, Thailand Author

moonlake,

Thank you for your sympathy. My mother was a great woman and the most unselfish person I have ever known. She could also forgive me and all of my sisters and brother for any wrong we did. I'm sorry to hear about your husband's sister dieing from Parkinsons. I really appreciate you sharing this hub!


Paul Kuehn profile image

Paul Kuehn 3 years ago from Udorn City, Thailand Author

Scribenet,

Thank you very much for the great comment. I really appreciate it.


Paul Kuehn profile image

Paul Kuehn 3 years ago from Udorn City, Thailand Author

Mary,

Thank you very much for the beautiful comments about my mother. I especially miss my mother on my birthday and on all holidays, especially Christmas. She was the only person who sent me a card or gave me a gift. Up until the last three years of her life, she would regularly send me a Christmas package. Thanks for voting this hub up.


Paul Kuehn profile image

Paul Kuehn 3 years ago from Udorn City, Thailand Author

JayeWisdom,

Thank you very much for your great comments. I really appreciate you reading this hub and commenting on it. No one has loved me as much as Ma, and I will always remember her. Yes, the memories do grow sweeter with time as the pain eases. I appreciate you voting up this hub.


kenneth avery profile image

kenneth avery 4 weeks ago from Hamilton, Alabama

Paul,

My sympathies and prayers for you. My mom left us a few years ago and while reading the story of your mom, I could have swore that you were writing about MY mom for she did all of these things too--self-educated; homemaker; generous neighbor and loved us unconditionally.

Dad was first to go to Glory and he and her were soulmates. Sure they had spats and would make up, but for 68 years they WERE the consummate man, wife, parents, neighbor.

Our daughter, 39, joined them Feb. 11 of this year and these sad events taught us to STOP using the phrase "I have LOST my mom, etc."

If you know where they are, they are NOT lost.

That one nugget of wisdom gives me peace and solace.

Loved your hub.

I wish I had been blessed with the chance to meet your mother.


Paul Kuehn profile image

Paul Kuehn 4 weeks ago from Udorn City, Thailand Author

Ken,

Thank you very much for the kind words about my mother. I am very sorry to read about the passing of your daughter at such an early age. Please accept my sympathy. I think you would have enjoyed meeting my mother because she was the kindest person I have ever known.


kenneth avery profile image

kenneth avery 4 weeks ago from Hamilton, Alabama

Paul,

Thank you for your kind words concerning my daughter and yes, I would have loved to sit down and listen (not talk) to your mom for an entire day for people such as your mom and mine were from a different leather. They were tough mentally, spiritually and emotionally.

I have a lot of respect for your mom and those like her.

And now you for writing such a great hub about her.

Take care and write me anytime.


Paul Kuehn profile image

Paul Kuehn 4 weeks ago from Udorn City, Thailand Author

Thank you once again for your very kind and thoughtful comments. As soon as I can, I look forward to reading and commenting on your hubs,.


kenneth avery profile image

kenneth avery 4 weeks ago from Hamilton, Alabama

Paul,

You are always welcome.

I acknowledge your superior writing talent and it is from your heart.

May I give you some free advice? Never take your talent for granted.

Although this is a simple statement, the ramifications are deep my friend.


kenneth avery profile image

kenneth avery 4 weeks ago from Hamilton, Alabama

Paul,

You are always welcome.

I acknowledge your superior writing talent and it is from your heart.

May I give you some free advice? Never take your talent for granted.

Although this is a simple statement, the ramifications are deep m


Paul Kuehn profile image

Paul Kuehn 4 weeks ago from Udorn City, Thailand Author

Although my writing is from the heart, I have to go a long way to achieve superior writing talent. I don't take my talent for granted and that is why I am striving to improve myself.

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