What Makes You Cry?

Whew!  That entrance made me tired!
Whew! That entrance made me tired!
"But  I don't want to take a nap."
"But I don't want to take a nap."

"Hush, little baby, don't you cry....." A Lullabye"

Chances are, the very first sound we make is the familiar wail of a newborn in that moment we enter this big wondrous world.

That cry is glorious music to the ears of a young Mom & Dad, who have anxiously awaited their Angel's arrival. So overwhelmed with pride and joy, our parents cry too. Their tears flow in awe of the precious miracle they behold. These are merely the first few teardrops shed of the rivers to come. There will be tears of joy, of celebration, tears of pride and even tears of fear. The strength of emotions shared by parent and child are the single-most powerful of all.

While this glorious event may be our first experience with tears, we're innocently unaware of the lifetime of tearful moments ahead of us.

We will come to discover that tears will surround us and follow each step along the roads we may travel.

The reality is, the trails we walk for decades to come, will have been paved with our blood sweat and tears. The end result we offer the world will be our legacy.

I can't stop laughing!!
I can't stop laughing!!
You are soooo funny!
You are soooo funny!

We Laughed Until We Cried....

You've tried to repeat the story. You want so badly to share with friends the fun you had and how you laughed, huge belly-laughs, until your abs screamed, "Stop!".... but it's just not the same. Sometimes, ya just gotta be there.

I will admit, that often I have found myself while walking through a store alone and out of nowhere, I laugh out loud. It's like a reflex you know and can't be helped. I think about my sister's humor, something she said or did that sent me into fits of laughter and I'm helpless to hold back. Gosh, it almost makes me cry now too as I struggle to remember the sound of her laugh. And we would literally laugh until we cried. How I miss that.
The wonderful thing about tears is that they're not just for sadness but happiness too ....and isn't this a wonderful thing? We've all had these moments. They remain our treasures. These precious memories collected through the years of laughter with the ones we love so intensely throughout our life. They live in our heart to comfort us in less-happy moments.

My guess would be that times such as these can bring on a smile even now as you remember the times you shared.... such crazy-fun moments. I'm so grateful for these memories. The day may indeed arrive when we hold them to give us comfort.

The aftermath

"My Head is about to explode."
"My Head is about to explode."

Physical ramifications of sobbing

While crying is a real form of emotional release, it can and often does wreak havoc upon us in a physical way. Any woman who has wept away her eye make-up can confirm having to cleanse the streams of black mascara running down her cheeks. It's a sight. With all the pressure and tissues used, we can assure ourselves a couple of very red, puffy eyes, not to mention that our nose becomes too congested to breathe through. Let's just say, there's very little we can do to attempt to hide the fact that we've been crying. We might as well confess.

When I've had myself a session of sobbing, I know to find the aspirin or OTC pain reliever of some sort, because a pounding headache is a certain aftermath. The benefits that may come from purging emotion, rest assured, will have it's share of physical toll. That's just the way it is. If possible, a little sleep may be in order. Come to think of it, can there be anyone who at some point, hasn't cried themselves to sleep? A broken heart is usually the culprit in this case.

This anger wears me out.
This anger wears me out.

Beyond Angry..when all we can do is CRY!

I should not deny, I am one of those women who cries when angry. I think I just don't know what to do with anger other than succumb to tears. Sure, it lessens the stress but does nothing for the appearance of strength.

We're conditioned to be strong and maintain composure. This is all great in theory and I suppose we should try to control emotions. I simply haven't learned how to do this and further, I can't seem to justify holding back true feelings.

Men have been known to suggest that a woman's tears are a powerful weapon. The biggest and rugged of He-Men have been know to transform to arms full of comfort...a soft place to fall.

When I consider frustration, it begins to appear that the female hormone is programmed exclusively for crying. I'm not proud to say this, but I feel this is true and I don't want to hide from the facts. When we're angry enough to hyperventilate, feel our blood pressure rise and want to scream.....something's gotta give. So it seems what gives is all composure and then the tears just fall.

It's a non-violent response to an upsetting issue, and besides....I've not heard anything about the possibility of a cure for tears...any time soon or the near future. I trust I have not misrepresented the female of our species.

At least, I hope it's easy to accept and maybe even admit....A damned good old fashioned cry, makes us feel so much better. Please don't ask why.

Sad times & Sad songs that make us cry..

Often, when people are feeling the least bit down and out, we may completely avoid mingling with others. More than this, we tend to protect our heart from exposure to sad stories or hearing an emotional song...the tear jerker type.. We're afraid, the least little jolt, will cause an avalanche of tears and wear us down to a blubbering sap.

There are those however, who can handle all of this and seem to think that facing the demon head-on is best. To each his own. Whatever works is what we need to do.

I do find it interesting to learn how others deal with their emotions. I'm always open to learning new ideas for handling sorrow and stress in ways that help the most. Technique matters.

It takes time and experience to know ourselves and become keenly aware of how we act and react. In some small way it can be comforting to know what to expect of our response in particular situations.

For instance, I know I cry at weddings.....the ambiance, the music and all that love in the air. The bride and groom are glowing, parents are emotional.....this scenario just overwhelms me.

Needless to say I cry my heart out at memorials and funerals. Loss is much too sad to all of us. We feel for the family and remember the pain and heartache of our own tragedies. Compassion allows us to comfort and console. Our tears are healing. We needn't even try to hold them back.

There are hundreds of reasons we humans cry. Any number of situations may bring us to tears. Emotions run freely and are expressed in numerous ways by each of us.

But because we are all children of the same Universe, we relate and communicate and share all of the same feelings needs and comforts. Our spirituality connects us all, in ways we may not even understand.

Some things, we just know. We see them, hear them and can sense them as well. Sadness shows itself in our actions and on our faces. Tears are visible. Laughter is contagious and spreads a joy from one end of the world to the other.

When we see someone hurting, we want to embrace and comfort them. We offer our time and our strength so that they might feel safer.

What makes you cry is what makes me cry. And so it goes for our fellowman. We have the power to dry each others tears and to walk with one another through the darkness.

I can't imagine it should be any other way. Can you?

Do you know why we cry??

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Comments 40 comments

fpherj48 profile image

fpherj48 21 months ago from Beautiful Upstate New York Author

Wow.....I've shed an ocean full of tears since I first wrote this hub!

fpherj48 profile image

fpherj48 4 years ago from Beautiful Upstate New York Author

Honey.....I'm quite behind schedule!! I have no idea why I was not notified of a comment....but I'm glad to know you came for a visit!! I rarely cry when something happens to me....I understand what you're saying. I guess. after awhile, we build a wall?

HoneyBB profile image

HoneyBB 4 years ago from Illinois

You really got me pegged...or we women pegged...I most certainly was smiling remembering a time when I laughed until I cried as you suggested I would be. I rarely ever cry when bad things happen to me anymore. However, I do find myself crying when I read something sad in somebody else's life. And, I can definitely imagine things that could happen in my life that would turn on the waterfall. I don't even want to go there or I just might .... cry! Thanks for sharing. This is a great hub. Voted+++

fpherj48 profile image

fpherj48 4 years ago from Beautiful Upstate New York Author

idig...Very true words. There's time to cry and time to laugh....and also a time for deep reflection. Peace to you.

idigwebsites profile image

idigwebsites 4 years ago from United States

It's all right to cry... it relieves your tensions and cleanses your eyes. As long as it will never be for too long, otherwise it'll make one really depressed. Thanks for sharing. :)

fpherj48 profile image

fpherj48 4 years ago from Beautiful Upstate New York Author

Thank you so much for your very touching comment. I appreciate you sharing your thoughts on how we interact with one another through emotion and expression.

Tears, whether due to sadness or laughter.....are a wonderful symptom that our heart is in great working order!! Peace.

remaniki profile image

remaniki 4 years ago from Chennai, India

Nice to be on your beautiful hub Paula and reading it from top to bottom and confirming to myself that I belong in your group - the crying team- for I am very emotional and cry and laugh (or even laugh until crying) all the time.

I loved these lines the best on this hub though the hub in its entirety is awesome. "While this glorious event may be our first experience with tears, we're innocently unaware of the lifetime of tearful moments ahead of us." Very well-said Paula.

Crying does relieve us of our tensions and worries. So let's all keep crying and laughing taking life as it comes. Peace and love, Rema.

fpherj48 profile image

fpherj48 4 years ago from Beautiful Upstate New York Author

You can that again, alocsin!

alocsin profile image

alocsin 4 years ago from Orange County, CA

I think crying and laughing are two necessary sides of the same coin. They both express strong human feeling, and we only know the meaning of one because of the other. Voting this Up and Interesting.

fpherj48 profile image

fpherj48 4 years ago from Beautiful Upstate New York Author

Nell ...you are so right. And the older I get (rather, my BODY gets) the expression, "laughed till I pissed me pants!!" well...it's no longer just an expression! LMAO.

I have to be very careful when I spend time with my crazy friends.....but then, they're pretty much in the same boat!! I suggest we all invest in Depends.. (Oh, what an awful thought!) No way.....I'd rather pack a change of clothes....hahahahahahahaha...

Sad tears are the pits. I guess there's no escaping that part of life.....which is why we have wonderful friends... Peace!

Nell Rose profile image

Nell Rose 4 years ago from England

I totally understand this, I cry if I hear a sad song, I cry if I hear someone else upset, and well, just about cry at everything! lol! I can also laugh as though my sides are going to split in two! my friend used to make me laugh so much I would nearly fall over with laughing! I do think that life makes us fill up like a glass of water, and all it takes is one more drop to make us cry, and laugh too!

fpherj48 profile image

fpherj48 4 years ago from Beautiful Upstate New York Author

Ruchira...Thank you dear lady.....I appreciate your thoughts....may you have far more tears of JOY....!!

Ruchira profile image

Ruchira 4 years ago from United States

wow...your beautiful hub and the message at the end made me cry (sob sob)

I feel it's okay to shed a tear here and there since; that makes me feel light and takes off a LOT of load off my shoulders and chest...lol

unlike my kid who just cries for every rhyme or reason...lol

beautiful hub, fpherj...voted up indeed!

fpherj48 profile image

fpherj48 4 years ago from Beautiful Upstate New York Author

Hello, Great Slanted One.....I hear you, my dear. In a few years, when you are over the Hormonal Hump....it gets better. It's a hell of a trip, getting there, but at some point, our tears dry up a bit.....and we laugh a whole lot more!! Has something to do with realizing we've cried more than our share! Hey, Chinese food is peppered with giggle spice.....you didn't know this?

Pratrieprincess....You are so kind! Thank you for such kudos. I'm glad you enjoyed my hub. Yes...commercials can do me in as well....depends on my mood, my fatigue, what time it is, where I am, who's with me, what happened 5 minutes before, if I'm hungry........WOMEN! We are an emotional mess, aren't we??? Don't need much of a motive to cry!! LOL

prairieprincess profile image

prairieprincess 4 years ago from Canada

This is awesome! I am new to your work and am definitely going to be your latest fan. I liked the way you organized our reasons for crying and then ended by concluding that crying brings us together, because we all cry for the same reason. How profound!

I, myself, can cry at a television commercial sometimes. I kind of revel in it, if that makes sense. A good cry makes me feel better and then I can go on. Thanks for this hub: I really enjoyed it!

Sharyn's Slant profile image

Sharyn's Slant 4 years ago from Northeast Ohio USA

Paula ~ This is such a great article with so much compassion and yet it still has that "Paula humor" which I love. I've cried way too many tears in my lifetime. It doesn't help being extremely emotional to begin with, even about very simple things. But as I was reading, I keep thinking about this one time when I was with two girl friends at a Chinese restaurant. I won't bore you with the details because as you say, "you just gotta be there," but the three of us could not stop laughing. I am giggling now just thinking about it. We DID laugh till we cried, peed and something oriental was coming out our noses for sure. Oh my! Thanks for bringing up this great memory!


fpherj48 profile image

fpherj48 4 years ago from Beautiful Upstate New York Author

Thank you so much Thoughtforce..(Tina...right?)

Women are emotional beings....the way we were created to be. Even your typical "Strong" woman has moments of tears.....

I can fully appreciate crying at just about anything that touches us.

I hope you keep a good supply of tissues! Bless you.

thougtforce profile image

thougtforce 4 years ago from Sweden

fpherj, I cry in every possible situations but I struggle to hold it back! I think it gets worse with age, and nowadays I am too emotional especially when it comes to my family, children or animals. I also cry when I see sad or romantic movies or hear sad or beautiful music! I do agree with you about that a real good cry makes us feel good inside even if I don't cry like that so often. It is more silent tears falling in all possible situations:)) I also cry when I laugh and when I am angry so this hub was like a description of me:)) But I guess it is a good thing to have emotions and to be able to feel for others, the opposite would be even worse! You wrote a lovely hub about crying! Voted up


fpherj48 profile image

fpherj48 4 years ago from Beautiful Upstate New York Author

Mystery solved......I went back and checked my comment section in one of my hubs....I confused you with "alancaster".........I suppose I can see how I did that.....I always have to do my investigating so I can be sure I'm just not getting "old & senile!!" LOL

fpherj48 profile image

fpherj48 4 years ago from Beautiful Upstate New York Author

Yes...you know, I should have checked where you are from.....the hubber I was thinking about is from England! But thanks for taking the time to respond.!!

Alastar Packer profile image

Alastar Packer 4 years ago from North Carolina

fpherj I may have read that one too but the daughter belongs to someone else, unless teenage nieces count lol.

fpherj48 profile image

fpherj48 4 years ago from Beautiful Upstate New York Author

Alastar...you and I met months ago. Goes all the way back to my "Raising Boys...." hub. If I'm not mistaken, your daughter attends SUNY at Buffalo? or is it Fredonia?

Actually, I was shocked to see that I was not already following you. I do believe I was and somehow you were deleted....which also goes back to my early days when I was a Hub-Baby, learning the ropes.

Thanks for stopping by. Good to see you again!

Alastar Packer profile image

Alastar Packer 4 years ago from North Carolina

You know something, I believe I read and voted up your Marketing Ploy Hub fpherj. Ha Ha that's funny about laughing out loud. People will look at you funny sometimes. Yes, that's true about most men, we hate to see you women cry cause it gets to us. Really makes me feel bad and want to comfort though. One of many special and generally sincere abilities the female gender has, crying and big hearts that is. Btw, science has recently proved how very beneficial tears can be- listen up Macho Man!

angela p profile image

angela p 4 years ago from Richmond, Virginia

fpherj48 - I have never heard that before...resembling Joan Collins. But thank you!! I will take that as a compliment...lord knows I need all I can get girl!

fpherj48 profile image

fpherj48 4 years ago from Beautiful Upstate New York Author

meloncauli....Goodness, even your Pen-name & your profile pic!!! Hmmmmm, this is interesting. I don't KNOW why you would watch something you already know makes you cry.....but, like I always say, to each his/her own. We're all different. You may do this simply because a"good cry," really is a big relief from things that are getting us down.

Thanks for the heads-up on "LaVie en Rose" (although I must admit, I never heard of it).....I'll stay clear of it.

I go OUT OF MY WAY to avoid as much sadness as possible..

meloncauli profile image

meloncauli 4 years ago from UK

Ha, I can cry at commercials too! We are definitely on the whole much more emotional than men. Every time I see the film GHOST I cry. It works very time. Now why on earth do I watch it then knowing I will cry? I watched La Vie en Rose for the first time last week and I needed a beach towel to mop up!

fpherj48 profile image

fpherj48 4 years ago from Beautiful Upstate New York Author

angela p...You are too funny! I hope you didn't cry for too long after commenting...lol. We woman are strange creatures..(not meaning to agree with men...but, you know)

Shifting the topic....I can't help but mention..if that is a pic of you, you bear a striking resemblance to a young Joan Collins. Do you hear that alot?

fpherj48 profile image

fpherj48 4 years ago from Beautiful Upstate New York Author

sunita sharma.....Keep laughing...keep crying...it's normal and healthy for us. What would life be like without all the smiles and tears?? Thank you so much for visiting. Please stop by anytime!

fpherj48 profile image

fpherj48 4 years ago from Beautiful Upstate New York Author

teaches12345....I hear you. Both a good cry and a fit of laughter, definitely relieve stress! They're also a good reason to not bother with eye make-up!! LOL

fpherj48 profile image

fpherj48 4 years ago from Beautiful Upstate New York Author

bill....I've really never known a man who doesn't cry....some, more openly than others. I was raised by a musician/song writer/poet....ya think my Dad may have been an "openly emotional sort of guy?" LOL...all 4 of my sons are the "soft touch" type, however macho their outer personna. My hubby has ceased trying to hide from me when something brings tears to his eyes.

Yes....we're all human, we all FEEL....therefore, we all cry. Thanks, bill. Always nice to hear from you. Peace

fpherj48 profile image

fpherj48 4 years ago from Beautiful Upstate New York Author

Tillie....We just can't escape the things that make us cry, so it's ever more important we seek out the people and things that make us laugh!! Without the balance of the two, I'm afraid we'd all be in adjoining rooms....if you know what I mean....the rooms with the padding on the walls?? Thanks for stopping by GF!! LOL

fpherj48 profile image

fpherj48 4 years ago from Beautiful Upstate New York Author

Martie....There was a time when I too cried at the drop of a hat....at just about anything, as you have confessed. However, after a diagnosis of clinical depression (myself and 10 million others...since it seems to be EPIDEMIC) and put on an Rx....my emotional status is stabalized to a "fake" lull. I've found I am not only more productive, but far more tolerant. So, basically, as you may have surmised....the Rx is best for the people AROUND me....as opposed to me!! Go figure, Girlfriend.

As long as Paula can calmly accept and keep smiling at the throngs of assholes all around us....it's all good.

Isn't this the female mission? "Let's just make sure everyone ELSE is happy!!" Arghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh! LOL

angela p profile image

angela p 4 years ago from Richmond, Virginia

Great hub! I cry about everything. I laugh a lot too. Just an emotional person I guess. I cry when watching sad movies and hearing sad songs too. Country songs seem to do it to me more than any. I feel so much better after a good cry...especially when I am stressed out and can't take it anymore! Like now....we are moving and lots of stress at the moment. Think I will go cry! LOL.

Sunita-Sharma profile image

Sunita-Sharma 4 years ago from Los Angeles,California,US

No matter how grown up we all are but there is a small child with in us, which makes you cry & laugh on certain situtions. Being an emotional person I do cry when I listen to songs that brings back memories of some special. I also cry when I watch romantic movies.This is a great hub..voted up ~:)

teaches12345 profile image

teaches12345 4 years ago

A good cry solves many things and relieves stress. We all need the tears and support of our friends to get through the tough trials of life. My favorite "crying" times come from excessive laughter and that is the best stress reliever for me! Voted up.

billybuc profile image

billybuc 4 years ago from Olympia, WA

One of the first things that changed for me once sobriety set its roots was the ability to cry once again and it was....liberating. I cry when I look at Bev and realize how much I love her...I cry when I see a mother with her newborn...I cry watching romantic comedies...and I cry when someone I know is hurting. It is a healthy release and today I welcome it and recognize it for what it is...being human. Great hub my friend!

tillsontitan profile image

tillsontitan 4 years ago from New York

We are definitely children of the same universe GF! I cry over commercials, come on admit it, some of those commercials, like when the Dad buys the son his first Ford? However, choice be given, laughing is so much better even when it's at my own expense. I love to laugh and find the humor in things like this wonderful hub! And yes, it made me smile. Voted up and funny and interesting.

MartieCoetser profile image

MartieCoetser 4 years ago from South Africa

I cry about everything.... what was and what could have been, my youth, buried in the past, the good, the bad and the ugly in my past, my present, my future, the beautiful blue sky, my granddaughter playing violin in the concert, compliments, beautiful comments on my hubs, ohhhh, just name it, and I can cry over/on/under/above/about it. Of course I try not to upset others with my tears.

But I can also laugh. I worship people who can make me laugh until I cry :)

This hub of yours, fpher, reminds me of my own - Emotional Orgasms.

Great minds....


Voted up and to cry over... because it is so unpretentiously true :)

fpherj48 profile image

fpherj48 4 years ago from Beautiful Upstate New York Author

I vote for laughing all the way too, GF. I've cried my own private river until it's banks overflowed....for more years than I care to think about.

I have to say that aging brings us a plus side and a minus side to just about everything....but I really have a better handle on my emotions than I did as a young, oh-so-sensitive girl.

I hate to say it, but at this point in my life, I hate like hell to give anyone the satisfaction that they've hurt or upset me!!!! lol.

Sunshine625 profile image

Sunshine625 4 years ago from Orlando, FL

This hub reminds me of this weekend. I was playing Barbie's with Faith and OMG I was laughing so hard that I couldn't even speak. I had tears streaming down my face! I think I burned about a 1,000 calories laughing so much. Those are my favorite laughs. I rarely cry at sad songs except for Keith Urban's Thank You song that he wrote as a tribute to Nicole Kidman since she basically saved his life from addiction. Google it! Crying is time consuming and I'd rather be doing other things so I rarely cry. I prefer to LMAO. Awesome hub as always my efferJ!

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