At some point I think you have to come to terms with all of the whole . This is how we grow and we can come out for the better or for the worse depending on how we deal with it. When we open our eyes, instead of trying not to look at the things we don't want to acknowledge, we see ourselves clearly and it is only then that we can decide how to proceed. As humans we aren't one dimensional. We have the potential to do good and evil, to be kind and hateful, selfish and selfless. The image we have of ourselves is just that, an image. It means nothing. Our lives, the choices we make, and what we do with our lives after we make certain choices is what means something. Do we get down on our knees and ask for forgiveness and move forward to a new, better and more self actualized place?
Do we decide we want to be someone different than who we thought and make the necessary changes? Do we stay paralized where we are in between who we thought we were and who we actually are ?
What you do is up to you. It's your life, there is a lesson somewhere here that has presented itself and we either grow from it or shrivel up.