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William Elliott says
I feel it is good to stand up for and be a kind friend first to oneself.
Letting go makes it go smoother. Seems you are finding your way.
Rhonda Malomet says
Great answer. I've also seen how being used way my responsibility. I could have said 'no' or communicated clearly. And I have seen how others perceived my actions as using them when I felt I was being a generous friend. It *is* a life long process!
Rhonda...you have learned well. But, please continue doing good deeds, because it is a tonic for your soul and gives hope to humanity.
Here's a bit more that summarizes what I said. It came over the electronic transom today
But don't allow yourself to be used.
But don't allow your heart to be abused.
Trust, but don't be naive.
Listen to others,
But don't lose your own v
Can we see the rest of that quote? The character limit cut it off.
I believe the last part is
"Trust your own voice".
I believe it's important to take the high road and be kind where possible unless it compromises you in someway.
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Gary R. Smith says
Tamara Wilhite says
Indeed. It is as if some people think they are so special they are entitled to your generosity...as if they are doing you a favor. Go figure!!!
JR Scarbrough MFA says
You sound like a wonderful friend to have, JR. In my travels and within my experience, many of the same children who took advantage of their friends and relatives in their youth continue to do it as adults. Many cannot break free from the mold.
Please understand, I am not wanting to be nosy or preachy.... just wondering, do you feel that forgetting the incident works for you? Can you process it that way, or does it get buried and work against you? Just published a hub about it.
70 years from now, your obituary will accurately portray you as a warm-hearted, intelligent, and caring woman, who was an amazing wife, mother, neighbor and friend. Please do not allow cold-hearted people to cool your warm, loving heart.
Positive psychology, Sledge. Usually helps. If the comment can't be pushed back, I analyze the bully or friend to try and understand why they did that. It sometimes helps for future use. Yes, I feel it works.
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Mike Monaghan says
You brought up some good points. Please keep in mind that some "friends" only like you while you're down or need you until they rise up. You were a good friend in poverty...but not in prosperity. I know how you feel because I've been there, too.
Moesky, yes it is a tricky question - to bring out thoughtful comments like yours. I wholeheartedly agree with your observations and insights and visited your profile page. Thanks.
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shaniqua robinson says
That is to understand, Thewriterlives27. Thank you for participating.
Old Empresario says
So, are you the one taking advantage of her kindness and then taking her for granted?
CJ Sledgehammer says
Marvelous response, C J. And thank you for letting me know about giving the hitchhiker a ride. I guess many feel that way, 'In fact, I am the friend I wish I had.' It reminds me of the proverb to first be a friend to oneself.