It depends on what was done. I have the memory of an elephant when someone does something terrible to me. I may forgive the transgression in time but I'll never forget and I'll be more guarded with that person. Other more minor infractions are easily tossed out. If it was a spouse I am a lot more forgiving of that.
I am very much the same way but it takes time. I have held grudges for years and later realize that it was stupid!! I try not to hold grudges anymore it just makes everything worse, it is easier and less stressful to forgive.
I just move on. Once the moment of anger is done, I'm done with letting it bother me. Bad times are only alive in our memories. I'd rather read a good book than sit around simmering about something that's done and gone.
I still won't watch the Dallas Cowboys because Jerry Jones fired Tom Landry, that was 1989. He fired him while Tom was playing golf, what kind of man fires a legend Like Tom Landry while he's on the golf course?
I guess I hold a grudge for awhile.
I'm pretty sure my not watching hasn't hurt their revenue.
When someone gives a personal lesson in meanness to a critter or to a person, that someone shouldn't be surprised if the student learns their lesson. But on the whole, I do my best to let it go. I don't squat with my spurs still on and my gloves are left on the pommel.
I hold grudges at the drop of a hat. I'm really bad about it. However, I work very hard at letting go and moving on. Odd that I should find this thread. Yesterday I had some extremely upsetting news from someone who was once very close to me.
So I held grudge, took a hammer and destroyed everything that person gave me. Took all the valuable gifts and memorabilia and gave it to a thrift store. Then I went to dinner with a friend and we bitched all night.
Good a good night's sleep. My house is clean. I think I'm fine now.
May not be exemplary conduct, but after being through so much betrayal and not knowing about it for a year, I feel better now.
Well, I didn't word that right. There were some little gifts that were ceramic-like, that I was given by the person, and took a hammer to them. All the rest went to the thrift shop. The betrayal was also about being used, deceived, etc. for a year or more.
I'm pretty understanding; and I have to say when someone I know has done something it's not usually because they intended it - so I don't hold a grudge. If someone I don't know does something (like some stranger at the grocer store) it's a small thing, so I don't hold a grudge.
On the other hand, if someone intentionally does something that hurts my kids there will be a lot more than a grudge for them to deal with; and I wouldn't think twice of devoting the rest of my life to seeking revenge (that's within the law, not outside of it). If there's a job to be lost at stake, a professional license, a reputation, or anything else; I'd be out to create as much damage and loss for them as possible.
i don't hold a grudge, i move on, but if possible if i lose trust in that person, move a w a y from them as well as on, in my own life. some people are just trouble makers, i can do without that in my life