I swear my thoughts are going to make me crazy! Ever since I have had my melt down/ affair I have turned in to a very scared depressed women whom has lets her thoughts get the best of her. I am scared and on edge ALL the time. I always seem to have that pit feeling in my stomach and I hate it. Everything I think is wrong even things that were minor before. I just want to be me again, for myself and my family. I hope it will go away
If you are married, then keep your affair to yourself. Never ever tell your husband. This has to be your burden, not his. Don't tell other friends, coworkers etc. Find a good therapist or Church leader and vent to them. I think this is showing that you're human and feeling some remorse. Good luck and you will pull through.
Mental chatter can be a real problem when it goes out of control. A simple trick is to start breathing consciously and keep your mind focused on breathing. This interferes with obsessive thinking. If you have not done anything wrong talk honestly with people whom your trust. This can be very cathartic and you need it. I have some hubs on mental chatter that might be useful.
[url=http://hubpages.com/hub/Are-You-a-Victim-of-Your-Mental-Chattering[/url]Finally, have yo tried brainwave entrainment audios? They change your brainwave frequencies and you get relaxed, say within 30-60 minutes. You just play the audio and allow yourself to be relaxed. One of my hubs talks about that too.
PS: Think of all the good qualities you have and imagine positive things happening to you. [color=#ff0000You should also know that you are much stronger than you think![/color]
I wish I knew how to ignore my thoughts. Sometimes they take control, and no matter what I try, they refuse be be kept under control. This leads to anxiety and depression. Medication isn't the answer, neither is alcohol. If you have a religious belief, then turning to it may help, and trying to put right any mistakes will certainly help you feel better about yourself. Also, trying to accept that we all make mistakes in life, and that anyone who pretends otherwise is lying. Also, try looking at the bigger picture. In an unimaginably sized universe, where our little planet is only one amongst billions in our own galaxy, and that our galaxy is only one of billions within the universe, and that the rest of the universe isn't even aware of our existence, makes one put things into perspective. Also, when considering how short life is, might help you to realise that worrying about things that have happened in the past will make no difference to your present or future, exept by making you ill.
Having said all that, I know it is easier said than done. The human mind has an endless capacity to torture itself.
It seems to me that you are not happy with your life and some of the choices you have made. Your 'thoughts' are your conscience, trying to sort out the mess. First off, you need to tell yourself that it's okay to make mistakes. That is how we learn, hopefully. Don't try to shut out the thoughts, listen to them, listen to YOUR INNER SELF. Somewhere deep inside, you have a vision of how you want your life to be. You need to eliminate the negative things in your life and surround yourself with positives. Stop reading the paper, stop watching the news. If you have friends that are uplifting and inspirational, hang with them. Avoid the people who bring you down. You need to take Action to change the things you do not like. As Sherlock said, this is easier said then done but if you have sunk low enough, there is no where to go but up.
All my best to you and may you find the peace and solace you not only crave but DESERVE.
I disagree with keeping an affair to yourself. That to me is simply unacceptable. It may be your burden, but your husband obviously has a right to know what is going on. Afterall, you are married to him. I always try to put myself in someone else's shoes. It would be extremely hurtful for me if my husband cheated on me and kept it from me. Ultimately, it is a mistake that has been made and the consequences of those actions need to be dealt with. And, keeping stuff like that in will destroy you and your thoughts. Everyone makes mistakes, so the first thing you need to do is come to terms with the mistakes you have made. I know this is easier said than done. I have made my fair share of mistakes and it took me a long time to come to terms with them. In fact, I am still working on it. Anyway, I just mainly wanted to point out that I believe it to be very wrong to keep this stuff from someone. In the end, that is your decision and if you feel like that is the right thing to do then I suppose it is! Good luck and I wish you the best!
Trust me everything is out in the open, if you read my other forms they have been out for a little while and this is just the after math of all guilt and how to rebuild trust within myself which is A LOT harder than it is. This situation is the worst thing have dealt with in my life. Everything I do these days I feel guilty , just because I am scared. I have never acted out the way I did but the put in my stomach and the guilt sucks and I know it will be awhile to over come. I go to a therapist and physiatrist to help me. My husband and I also see the therapist together. I love him and I am happy with my life, at times content but that happens with everyone. I know what I did may not be okay but I am learning from it and I want to take it back but I can’t . I also know that I always had that type of personality and I am changing it. I do know that my family is my life and they make me so happy and the thought of them being gone kills me.
Get your mind off of yourself and focus on somebody who is worse off than you are. Only then will you be cured.
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