LETTERS TO YOU: “How to recognise and challenge limiting beliefs?” Part I
What is holding you back in life? Most of our limiting beliefs were ‘installed’ in our minds in childhood. Maybe you’ve heard your parents or teachers saying “you can’t have it because you don’t deserve it, money doesn’t grow on trees, you can’t depend on anyone but yourself, I don’t have enough time, rich people are evil, nobody will ever love you if you misbehave...etc.” Sound familiar? We have all been living our lives based on these rules and guides. In a way, we always look for an easy way out and use these limiting beliefs as excuses. We can always justify why we have or haven’t done something. For example “I’d rather stay poor and honest, than become rich, because money is the root of all evil”. Limiting beliefs lie at the heart of almost each challenge we have to overcome. If you are serious about achieving your big life goals, stop sabotaging yourself and get rid of the limiting beliefs once and for all.
- Recognise your limiting beliefs. Write down all the possible beliefs you hold about yourself and the world. Remember that beliefs are just our assumptions, which are true only for us. Limiting beliefs are negative statements in our mind. Limiting beliefs could be:
I am not lucky
There is no hope
I’ve tried everything
It’s impossible to become rich without losing friends
I will never find a good job
No one loves me
I always screw up
I am not smart enough
I don’t deserve it
I can't trust anyone else to do the job as well as I can, so I have to do everything myself
When things are going well, something very bad will happen to ruin it, so I won't let myself enjoy anything too much
- Challenge every single limiting belief you’ve written. For example, your belief is “Nobody loves me”. Questions this belief using these sample questions:”Who is this nobody? Do I absolutely know it’s true? Who told me so? Is this person a role model to me? Does this person have any proof? Do I have any proof? What does love mean to me? What would I be without this belief? What might happen if I didn’t believe it was true?” For each belief, think of examples from your life, which will prove that these statements are not entirely true. For instance, belief “I am not lucky” proves untrue because “I was lucky to pass that exam or I won a lottery a few times ”. Think of all the possible ways each limiting belief got in your way towards achieving something. Did this belief prevent you from taking actions? Find the sources of your limiting beliefs. Dig deep into memories. Did this particular limiting belief come from childhood or last year’s event? By the time you finish analysing your limiting beliefs, you will realise that these beliefs are just your assumptions, which act as the barrier between you and your desirable well-balanced life. Notice the other side of your beliefs. Change them into positive statements, such as, “I can do this, I am smart enough, I deserve it, I am capable of sustaining a healthy relationship…etc. ”
- Learn to listen to your self-talk. Is it negative or positive? If it’s negative most of the time, then it’s time to practise positive thinking. Just practise it daily. It will help you maintain your positive thinking and attract exactly what you want in your life. It’s not all about knowing “the law of attraction” and watching a movie “Secret” a few times, it’s about recognising that the journey towards positive thinking requires work. What you put out in the world comes back to you – only ten times more! Avoid people that don’t believe in you and always challenge you to do something. It’s not them you want to prove wrong, it’s you that you want to prove right. Every action you take must have a positive agenda behind it. And every action you take must be done for your benefit, not for someone else’s.
Be healthy, happy and wealthy.....and Remember: “When you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change.”
Always by your side,
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